The Ultimate Final Fantasy Parody
by princess454
Summary: This is the ultimate Final Fantasy parody. The best, longest, funniest parody you'll ever read. It includes FF characters from 7, 8, X, & X2. Lots of cross over pairings, lots of plot lines and more. It's the ultimate Final Fantasy Parody!
1. Chapter 1: The Announcement

PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ THE STORY:

First off, this is a fan fiction **parody**. It is not based on the story line of any Final Fantasy game. It is a mix of the characters of Final Fantasy in one story.

There may be a few typos, but I won't read the whole thing just to fix them because it's pretty long already. I started writing this a while go, with no intention to put it on here. Again, this was written, especially the beginning, awhile ago just for fun. I'm not publishing it or doing anything important with it, it's just here and on other web sites for my friends to read and for others who enjoy a good laugh to read. I seriously tried to edit it to the best of my ability. (You try editing 184 pages...) Though I'm not publishing anything don't copy any of the ideas used in this story. You might find some great, some super funny, but that doesn't mean you can take it. Capiche? However, if for some odd reason, sequels or other fan fictions that are based off of this appear, make sure its ok with me and that I get credit. I have no problem with people adding side stories or using this as an idea helper kinda thing, as long as everyone knows I was the original creator. This has happened before, I have many dedicated fans to this parody (sweat drop).

So if you're looking for something serious and well...serious, I suggest you find something else because this fan fiction is somewhat random, but not stupid, and funny. There are certain parts that display certain things, such as a serious part, then a random part to maybe break the tension and make you laugh. Trust me. Even though it may not look like it at first, there really IS a main plot line to this whole thing...hehe.

There might even be some other extra characters in it, like InuYasha and Himura Kenshin come in for no apparent reason...and yeah, it's just for fun. Also I'm mostly known online as Princess, so I refer to myself at times as Princess on here.

Um...let's see...what else...oh, and if you're an uptight Final Fantasy fan, for safety reasons you shouldn't read this either. Keep in mind also that not all Final Fantasy characters are in it, actually it's mostly 7, 8, 10, 10-2 characters. Also if there's something 'wrong' about a character, it's most likely done on purpose, because I assure you that they will not act the way they're 'supposed' to act. They are merely exagerated. There's a reason for that but I won't bore you with the story, and also to make it simpler, it's funny. If you don't get something just skip over it. Anything in ( ) is probably comments by me...indicating a part I think funny or weird...stuff like that. I'm not saying I don't accept criticism, it's just most of what people will write bad about are most likely things that are intentional. Also, if you really don't like this story, why read it? Just...don't read it. This is only here for my friends, but then again...they did say I should put it on here...eh, who knows.

Here comes the part where some people get confused. Please don't ask me and nag about how "Hey, wait a minute! Aeris is dead! Sephiroth too! Auron also! Tidus isn't real! What the heck you crazy lady!" Um, hello? I know that! Duh. In this story every dead character is brought back to life, those some of us like, some...we don't really like. Hehe. And this isn't taking part in a Final Fantasy world either. All the characters are people, just like us. They're still Cloud, still Tidus, they have their super powers, swords, everything. They just know they're video game characters. In fact, in the world of this story, being a video game character is the same thing as being an actor or actress. All the characters are actually known celebrities, and some didn't just stop at video games. Take Yuna for example. She's loved by millions of fans, and has released quite a few CD's. Wanna leave already? It's really not that confusing. You know what? I shouldn't be writing this on the first place. I should've left you to fend for yourself! But NO. I'm too nice. You better read my story now.

Another subject I get nagged on about a little too much sometimes. Yes. There are a lot of Final Fantasy cross over pairings. You know what? I don't give a cheese cake as to what you think about it. I chose these specific couples for a reason. (Ok not really but its still funny right?) This story has grown and developed between me and my friends for a long time now, and its no use changing it now. Even if I wanted too. Which I don't. I like these Final Fantasy pairings just fine thank you! And don't even THINK about coming on over to me and nagging this and that about age difference. Love is love, no matter how many years apart you are from someone. Oh yeah, no there's no Yaoi on here...sorry fans of Yaoi, hehe. When I started this I actually had no idea what Yaoi was. And there's no Yuri here either (sorry Cloud) and don't think I'm some kind of homophobe either its just that it never crossed my mind really...

Alright...I guess you can read it now. Once again, this is for fun, FUN! And is in no means important or created to make anyone's life easier. It's just...here. Here to make you laugh. And sing along. Yeah you guessed it...this is a musical too. Have fun!

* * *

Chapter 1: The Announcement / The Trip.

Auron burst through the wall.

"I'm getting married," He announced. Everyone ignored him, you know, because everyone ignores old people. Auron sighed. "I'm getting married," He repeated. Again, everyone continued what they were doing and paid no mind to him. Quistis came calmly through the hole Auron made through the wall, and stood next to him.

"Hey everyone! I'm getting married!" She announced. Instantly, all the girls ran to her and started talking in fast and loud girl talk mixed with giggles and high pitched exclamations. The guys just muttered their congratulations meekly and returned to what they were doing.

"Oh, Quistis! Whose the lucky guy?" Yuna's voice could be heard louder then the babble of girls.

"Oh, it's Auron!" Quistis replied happily. The babble stopped.

"You're...kidding, right?" Yuna asked disbelieving.

Everyone except Quistis started laughing nervously. "Nice joke Quistis, but this is no laughing matter. Who are you really getting married to?" Tifa asked.

"I'm not joking, I am getting married to Auron," Quistis replied.

Everyone went back a step or two and stared at her.

"Well...if that was the best you could do," Yuna said sadly and patted Quistis on the arm as if something tragic had happened.

"Wait...Auron is getting married to Quistis? Is that what I heard?" Tidus asked coming in the room with a bag of popcorn and stuffing it furiously in his mouth.

"Yeah," Auron replied slapping his fore head. Tidus started choking and Yuna patted his back hard and he spit popcorn on everyone. When he stopped and he motioned for Yuna to stop, he walked over to Auron.

"Look, Auron, buddy... You can't go joking around like this. You're already not popular with the guys, the fans, you know. I mean, why would anyone ever marry you? Auron, it's time I give you the 'talk'. The talk my friend, is about something called 'being attractive'. Look at me, I'm blonde, I'm blue eyed, and I'm tan. I have my own video game, a cute girlfriend, I'm a _super star_. I have millions of fans, and what do you have Auron? Nothing. Not even money. Not even looks. Your life ended before it even started. I'm sorry I was the one to have to break it to you...but I knew I'd be the one. I knew, oh how I knew! Right when I first met you. So, you have to _stop_ this while you can buddy, the guys are getting suspicious," Tidus said doing a hanging motion with his hand.

"But Tidus, it's not about what is on the outside, it's about what is in the inside," Auron replied.

"Oh Auron, you're always filled with that mumbo-jumbo. Besides, I'm pretty sure your insides are ugly too," Tidus replied patting Auron hard on the back.

Auron pushed him away and turned to the rest of the group. "We're getting married at a resort outside a small town. Of course we want all of you to be there, so you have to travel in the Final Fantasy Lounge bus, while me and Quistis go in my car," Auron announced. Immediately, complaints and groans filled the room.

"I don't wanna go in that stinky rickety old bus!" Rinoa cried.

"Yeah, we haven't be in that thing since our college road trip!" Cloud piped up.

"Which we didn't even get to all the way!" Tifa agreed.

"Whatever!" Squall agreed too.

"You're going and that's it," Auron growled.

"Oh and Rinoa will be my Maid of Honor!" Quistis announced smiling.

"Yay! Oh Quisty, really! Oh this is great! Isn't it great Squally?" Rinoa exclaimed shaking Squall's arm.

"Whatever," Squall muttered.

"Tidus...unfortunately I chose you to be one of my best men," Auron announced in a dull voice. Tidus jumped and looked up in glee, with his face lighting up in complete joy.

"Wait, whose the other one?" Yuna asked.

"Jecht," Auron replied.

Tidus came down and his smiled faded. "What?" Tidus cried.

"Sorry...I had to, I couldn't choose between you two so I chose both," Auron explained.

"That jerk is going to be in the wedding! Oh, I won't be able to face him!" Tidus cried out again. Auron shrugged.

"It's ok Tidy Baby, just don't...talk...to him," Yuna said putting on a supportive smile.

"_I'll be standing right next to him Yuna!_" Tidus cried. Yuna shrugged.

"Alright you whipper-snappers, let's get em' going!" Auron cried. (Whoa...nice line Auron) And, like in all twisted and random stories, their bags and stuff got MAGICALLY transported to the bus, and Auron and Quistis gave the gang instructions and left.

* * *

On the road...

Tidus was sitting in the driver's seat with Yuna on the passenger seat, and everyone else was squished up in the back (Hehe, losers). Suddenly Tidus's face lit up again and he turned the radio up.

"Yuna! It's our song!" He cried. Soon "Born to be Wild" was audible all over the bus.

"Get your motor runnin'!" Tidus sang.

"Head out on the highway!" Yuna sang back.

"Lookin' for adventure!" Tidus sang again.

"And whatever comes our way!" Yuna sang back again.

"Yeah Darlin' go make it happen!

Take the world in a love embrace!

Fire all of your guns at once!

And explode into space!" They sang.

"Booooooooooorn to be Wiiiiiiild!" Tidus and Yuna sang extra loud.

Sephiroth's fist shook with rage. _"Would you two can it_ !" He bellowed. Yuna turned around in her seat and stuck her tongue out.

"You're just mad because you're lonely," She pointed out. Cloud laughed.

"SHUT-UP!" Sephiroth cried.

"Nice one Babe," Tidus complimented.

"Hehe, thankies!" Yuna replied and they did a secret hand-shake.

"I love you," Tidus cooed.

"I love you too!" Yuna replied.

"_I hate the both of you_!" Sephiroth cried from the back.

"Just, when do we get there?" Vincent asked timidly from the back as well.

"Tidy hun, when do we get there?" Yuna asked. Tidus didn't reply.

"Babe? Tidy Bear? Tidus? Hello?" Yuna cried. Tidus started to hum.

"It's official. Tidus has gone deaf," Cloud commented.

"I haven't gone deaf!" He cried.

"Then why won't you answer?" Yuna wondered.

"Because my name isn't Tidus at this period of time," Tidus explained.

"Then what is it?" Cloud asked. Tidus simply pointed at his dorky driver's hat. It read "Mr. Cool Driver."

"Ok Mr. Cool Driver, when do we get there?" Yuna asked.

"Mr. Auron-not-as-cool-of-a-driver hasn't _called_ yet," Tidus, I mean, Mr. Cool Driver replied.

"Yeah, probably in the back seat with Quistis," Cloud said, making uninvited visuals in everyone's mind. Gee. Thanks Cloud.

"Could you be anymore gross?" Zell complained and looked oddly at Cloud. Cloud shifted his eyes and hid his face behind an upside down newspaper. Suddenly, as if on cue, or perhaps nothing else in the story happens, Tidus's radio buzzed and he picked it up.

"Yo," He said into it in a cool voice.

"Tidus, where the hell are you? We got at the resort thirty minutes ago!" Auron cried. Tidus looked around nervously and everyone glared at him.

"Why did Tidus have to be the driver?" Tifa groaned.

"C'mon people, we're not lost," Tidus reassured them. Auron could be heard groaning on the other line of the radio.

"Tidus, just follow the map and get here _before _the wedding," Auron said and signed off.

"He didn't say over and out," Tidus noted sadly.

"Here, let me take a look at the map," Yuna said extending her hand to get it.

"No! Don't!" Tidus cried. Yuna's hand came back.

"Why?" She asked suspiciously.

"Women can't read maps. Here, Cloud, you take it," Tidus said and tossed Cloud the map. Yuna crossed her arms and looked out the window.

"Tidus...you had the damn map upside down," Cloud said slapping his forehead.

"Women can't read maps," Yuna muttered under her breath.

"Hey, I either drive, or read, I can't do both!" Tidus snapped. Cloud turned the map the right way and began telling Tidus the _right _way to go. Soon over an hour, they finally got to the resort. Tidus parked the bus and they all got out and hotel boys got their bags out too.

"I call Tidus as my room mate!" Wakka cried jumping out.

"Fucking no way! I get Tidus, and Squall and Vincent, and Sephy...well, I get everyone except Wakka," Cloud declared.

"I'm not sharing a room with you dumb heads even if somebody paid me. The Best Man, gets his _own_ room," Tidus replied.

"I wanna go in your private room!" Wakka complained. Tidus looked at Wakka oddly.

"_No! _God Wakka, how gay could you be? Me and Yuna are sharing!" Tidus cried. Wakka looked at Yuna.

"Oh yeah. I forgot she was here," He replied. Tidus slapped his forehead.

"Well, for all the single guys, we'll all share one room," Cloud said. "And make it the coolest bachelor pad ever!" He high fived Zell.

"Aww man. You guys get to do all the fun stuff," Tidus whined sadly.

"That's ok then Tidus, you get my spot. I'll share with Yuna," Cloud replied and slid over next to Yuna. "How about it cream puff?" He asked. Yuna shoved him.

"Get away from me Cloud!" She cried in disgust.

"Ok, ok, just watch the hair," Cloud said with his hands immediately flying up to his head in a smooth like manner.

* * *

They walked in to the lobby.

"Hello, welcome to Happy Happy Hotels, how may I make your happy stay here at Happy Happy more happier?" The desk lady asked a little too perky. She's been working here a long time. Tidus looked at her weirdly and told them they were here for a wedding. "Name of the groom please," The lady asked going to the computer.

"Auron," Tidus replied.

"Last name too Sir," She asked.

"I don't _know_ his last name, what am I, _People_ magazine? Geez," Tidus replied. The lady typed something and grinned wider.

"Alright, all of you have been checked in. The rooms are that way and when we have special occasions such as weddings you can rent out the whole hotel! So the place is all yours," Happy Lady said.

"Awesomeness! Who loves Auron and his wedding? I do!" Cloud cried and ran to the room hallway.

"Yunie, though you're sharing with Tidus, you can come to our bachelorette room anytime!" Tifa said.

"Alright," Yuna replied. Everyone walked into the hallway.

"Nooooo...there's three rooms with three beds each and three master bedrooms. What are we going to do?" Cloud grumbled.

So they decided that, Auron and Quistis get the far back master room, Yuna and Tidus with the second, and Rinoa and Squall with the third. Aeris and Tifa got one regular room, Sephiroth, Vincent, and Cloud got one, and Zell and Wakka share the other. So two rooms have one bed extra, in case one of the couples fight or something. Just to make that clear, you know...because later on, I don't want people to get confused by all the moving. Right. Ok. Next paragraph.

Yuna and Tidus were in their room putting everything away. "Hey look! We got presents," Yuna announced. A hotel boy guy dropped off two boxes.

"Heh, I love those baggage boys, they wear such funny hats!" Tidus exclaimed. The guy was still standing in the room, and glared at Tidus before leaving.

"Ooh...Tidus, these are from your dad," Yuna said cautiously.

"Yeah right," Tidus retorted. "He wouldn't even give me stuff for Christmas, why the hell would he give me something now?"

Yuna shrugged and picked up one addressed to her. "I hope this isn't what your dad... usually...gives me," Yuna said in a scared voice.

"If it is, I'll kill him," Tidus replied simply. Yuna opened it and took out a short and way too small lingerie dress thing. Night gown thing. Well...really I don't know. I wasn't there.

"What the flip is that!" Tidus cried.

"I think your father misunderstood who was getting married...," Yuna replied meekly. A card fell out of it. "Dear Yuna, I hope you like the gift. I _do_ know it's Auron's wedding, but I just wanted you kids to have a little fun. I hope you've been working on that diet to lose...those...pounds!" Yuna read.

"You're not fat!" Tidus erupted nervously.

"How dare he!" Yuna cried and chucked it out the window.

At that same time Wakka was randomly strolling by, when a super short and way too small night gown thing came flying at him and hit him right in the face. He looked at it in his hands and a slow grin appeared. "Dear Diary: Jack Pot," He said and ran off.

"Let's see what he got you," Yuna said and reached for a square rectangular box.

"I can't believe Auron invited him. He knows we hate each other, he _knows _he's always sending me weird gifts when he's _not _sending me gifts, and the nerve of him calling my girlfriend fat, and _encouraging _bad behavior, what kind of a dad is that! And another thing-," Tidus started.

"Here Tidus just take it and open it, let's get this over with!" Yuna cried cutting him off and tossing the present to him. Tidus decided to read the card first.

"Dear Son, all I can say is...don't get too ahead of yourself," Tidus read.

"I wonder what that means," Yuna said suspiciously. Tidus closed his eyes and ripped the wrapper off.

"Yuna... Tell me what it is," He ordered.

Yuna backed up like, all the way over to the other side of the room before answering. "Are you sure?" She asked in a scared voice.

"_Yes_," Tidus replied.

"Just, look for yourself," Yuna said strapping an army helmet on. Tidus peeked out one eye, and he started shaking. Steam like totally puffed out of his ears and he was red and he cried out in anger.

"_What...the...heck_!" He exploded. Hehe. I mean, poor Tidus. "_I can't believe he sent me a box of tissues_!" Tidus bellowed.

"Tidus, calm down," Yuna said helplessly from under the bed. Then who showed up save the day? I mean make it worse?

"Hey guys!" Cloud cried popping in. Tidus was still slightly hyper ventilating. "Whoa...what happened here? You guys fighting?" Cloud asked.

"No! Tidus just got a really stupid gift from his dad...who purposely sent it...to make fun of him. Yeah, that's it," Yuna replied. Cloud noticed the tissue box in Tidus's hands. His face scrunched up and he put his hand over his mouth. "Cloud! _Don't_!" Yuna cried. But it was too late. Cloud buckled to the floor and holding his stomach he started laughing really hard. Yuna slapped her forehead. Tidus rubbed his forehead instead.

"Cloud! Please _leave_," Tidus snapped. Cloud was getting up, still laughing, when he took one look at the tissue box and started laughing all over again. "Yuna, just dispense of this please," Tidus said tossing the tissue box aside. Yuna picked it up and threw it in the trash can, to which finally Tidus let out a big breath and felt relieved.

"Ah man, you guys ruin all the fun," Cloud complained. He then left. Two seconds later he came back. "Oh yeah, and the reason I came was to tell you to get ready," He said.

"For what?" Tidus asked.

"Looks like Auron signed us up for _horse back riding_, the little bastard," Cloud announced. Tidus groaned but Yuna squealed with delight.

"Oh joy! What a good way to spend a nice sunny day, and we won't have to deal with moving in to a smelly hotel room now!" Yuna said happily. Too bad Yuna doesn't know what's bound to happen...

* * *

Intermission. Feel free to grab a snack, make a drink, because things are only going to go downhill from here. Er, I mean, get better from here. Hehe.

* * *

Everyone met up in the lobby.

"Hey look, Auron left us a note. So kind of him, eh?" Cloud said taking a taped piece of paper from the door knob leading outside. "Dear kind wedding guests...yeah right...uh, blah blah, we won't see him 'till the wedding, yadda yadda," Cloud read.

"That's fine with me, I'm here to enjoy the hotel, then the wedding later," Tifa confirmed placing her hands on her hips. I don't even think Tifa likes Auron all that much.

"Hear, hear!" Tidus agreed and did an imaginary cheers.

"When do we get to ride the blasted horses?" Sephiroth growled.

"Sephy wants a cute little white pony! Doesn't he?" Zell cooed in a baby voice. He and Wakka laughed. Sephiroth's eye brow twitched and he gave them a murderous glare. Wakka and Zell shut up and shrunk. Cloud went up to Sephiroth.

"You know buddy, you gotta teach me how you do that," He said placing his arm around Sephiroth's shoulders.

"Don't...touch...me," Sephiroth replied. Cloud immediately pulled his arm back and backed away a little.

"Alright! Talk to ya later Sephy! Right...," Cloud said loudly and walked back to where he was.

"Let's just go outside already," Tidus complained. The gang (Heh...the gang...) made their way outside and followed some arrows reading "Stables." Once they got there, a man with a straw hat and chewing on a wheat...thing...looked up at them. He gave them a tooth less grin.

"Ew...," Yuna muttered walking closer to Tidus.

"Yo Johnny! We got em' city kids here early!" The man shouted out.

"City kids?" Cloud repeated. The man, whose badge read Buck, nodded at them. Johnny came out then carrying some saddles. He was around their age and wearing a cute cowboy outfit. He smiled at them; well, mainly Yuna, Tifa, and Rinoa, and walked by.

"Country boys are sooo cute!" Yuna, Tifa, and Rinoa chorused.

Tidus and Cloud grumbled and Squall simply grumbled "Whatever."

"Johnny will assign all yer' horses," Buck said. Johnny came out leading two horses.

"Alrighty," He agreed. He faced them and everyone stared at him back. "You...and uh...you," Johnny said pointing at Wakka and Squall. They walked forward. "You get Jacko here," Johnny said to Squall.

"Whatever?" Squall asked coming near the horse.

"What?" Johnny asked.

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"Whatever?"

"What?"

"What..._Ever_...?" Squall cried. Johnny was about to say "What?" when Rinoa cut him off.

"Wait! So sorry," She apologized. She took a transmitter kinda thing out of nowhere and put head phones on.

"Whatever?" Squall repeated. Rinoa furrowed her brows in concentration and spun the dial around until she got it tuned. "Whatever?" Squall repeated tiredly.

"He's asking, if this is the right way to get on the horse," Rinoa confirmed putting the transmitter away.

"Where the heck did you get that?" Cloud asked. Rinoa shifted her eyes.

"Ebay...," Rinoa replied nervously.

"Figures," Cloud muttered scratching his chin.

"Oh...yeah, you get on the left side of the horse," Johnny said looking at Squall oddly.

"Whatever," Squall replied and got on. I've actually researched Squall language a little for the parody, and as hard as it may be to learn, I know a few words. Squall definitely said "Thank you" just now.

"You. With the funny orange hair," Johnny said. Wakka came forward. "You get Mrs. Puffycream," Johnny assigned. Cloud laughed out loud and pointed at Wakka, who reluctantly climbed upon Mrs. Puffycream, who wheezed when Wakka sat. Cloud was completely enjoying this and laughed and pointed some more.

"Right, now I need Dracula the Second, Spikes, and Miss Transmitter," Johnny called. Vincent, Cloud, and Rinoa went forward. They each got a horse.

"Hey Vincent, my horse is called Champion," Cloud proclaimed proudly.

"What is my horses's name?" Vincent asked raising a hand.

"I figured you were a tough boy...I got ya Thunder," Johnny replied to Vincent's black horse. Vincent smirked at Cloud who looked away.

"Not...too tough, eh Dracula Jr.?" Buck asked.

"No worries, I'm a professional horse rider," Vincent replied.

"Hey Vincent! They have real horses here, no demon ones, sorry!" Tidus called out and snickered.

"Shut up Tidus! If Vincent says he's pro, then he's pro," Yuna added.

Vincent just maneuvered his horse to go forward and he turned his back on everybody. He was a professional horse rider. He was. _He shall be a professional horse rider._

"Now...how about Cowboy Barbie, and Ken," Johnny called. Yuna and Tidus came forward. "Here ya go Barbie, you get Dolly, she's mild," Johnny said. Yuna re-settled her Gucci sunglasses, sprayed bug spray around her one last time, and got on Dolly. "Now for Ken...you can get Lightning," Johnny said and lead over another black horse. "This 'eres Thunder's brother."

Tidus got on Lightning proudly. "Don't worry. I _know_ how to ride horses," Tidus replied loud enough for Vincent to hear. Johnny just shrugged.

"Now...whose left?" He asked and looked back at the group. "Military Barbie, Dracula Returns, Flower Barbie..." Tifa, Sephiroth, and Aeris came forward. "And...let me guess...your name is Zell," Johnny determined in a matter of fact bored voice.

Zell shifted his eyes. "How did you know?" He asked in a scared voice. Johnny snickered.

"I know a Zell when I see one."

"I didn't know it was a common name!" Zell muttered suspiciously. The rest all got horses and Buck walked up to Vincent.

"Yo Fangs, listen here," Buck called. Vincent reluctantly turned around.

"Yes?" He asked.

"I wanna hear too!" Tidus cried and trotted over to them.

"You two listen up. Here is the map to the trail...I mean, I _would_ go with ya, but seeing as how you're a professional horse rider and all, you can take it, right?" Buck asked.

"Yeah I can take it," Vincent and Tidus replied in unison. They glared at each other then turned back to Buck. They should have said no. They should have agreed to have a guide. But no. No!

* * *

After getting instructions, Vincent lead the group and everyone followed.

"I can't believe I'm going to be stuck riding a filthy mammal around for two hours," Sephiroth growled.

"Just enjoy something for once, will ya Sephiroth?" Tifa complained.

"I will _not _enjoy something!" Sephiroth cried.

"Resistance to have fun, denial on leisure," Aeris muttered jotting it down.

"Aeris...what are you doing?" Wakka asked.

"Oh. Well, I've been majoring in Psychology and decided to have a project using Auron's wedding. It was perfect, seeing as how we all would be together for the whole of Auron's wedding and beyond, which is quite a long time to spend with around ten people. You see, I'm basically just going to survey up who needs therapy, and see if I can help them," Aeris concluded. Wakka nodded.

"Wait...what's your Aunt Marge doing in New York?" Wakka asked. Aeris anime sweat dropped and just told him to never mind.

"Might as well add everyone Aeris. We _all_ need therapy," Tidus said.

"Yeah, especially after this," Cloud added. Aeris shrugged and continued taking notes.

"I don't need therapy," Yuna protested.

"More than you think Sweetheart," Sephiroth sneered. Cloud laughed. Yuna just groaned and moved up ahead.

"Something bothering you Lady Yuna?" Vincent asked.

"Damn jerks. I just wanna enjoy a peaceful horse ride, is that so much to ask?" Yuna wondered. Vincent shrugged.

"Maybe it is. Maybe not. Depends if you deserve it," Vincent replied. Yuna looked at him oddly.

"Whatever. I just want them to leave me alone," Yuna said.

"Where is your partner, Tidus?" Vincent asked plucking a shrub and inspecting it. Yuna turned around. Tidus was riding next to all the other guys laughing and joking around.

"He's hanging out with his friends. Why aren't you?" Yuna asked.

"Because I need to make sure we don't get lost," Vincent grumbled. "And besides, I am conversing with you," He added. Yuna shrugged.

"I can just go ride by the girls," She said. Vincent shrugged back.

"If you wish," He replied.

"Or...I can keep talking to you. They're busy anyway," Yuna noted turning around and watching what the girls were doing.

"If you wish that too," Vincent replied. Yuna couldn't read his mind so she just rode closely behind him. They rode in silence for awhile when suddenly Vincent slowed down until he was right next to her. "Here," He said and extended a plant to Yuna. It was a weird plant that resembled a skinny bulb, with four wide leaves covering it.

"Hehe...nice," Yuna replied nervously.

"No, see, pull that leaf," Vincent instructed. Yuna pulled it and gasped in surprise. The leaves then flowed out by themselves, revealing a beautiful pink flower, freshly bloomed.

"There you go. I hope it makes you feel better," Vincent said handing it to her. Yuna took it and held it gently.

"Thanks Vincent," She replied and smiled at him. Vincent nodded and took the map out, and looked around. Yuna then backed up and rode next to Tifa and Rinoa instead.

"Hey guys," She greeted.

"Hey Yuna. What were you talking to Vincent about? We getting close?" Tifa asked.

"Um, yeah, sure," Yuna replied. She hid the flower in her purse.

"I wish the guys would stop fooling around and actually ride with us or something...this is really boring...," Rinoa sighed.

"The world doesn't revolve around men, Rinoa," Tifa snapped.

"Yes it does!" Rinoa pouted.

They looked back at the end of the group, where all the guys were attempting to shove each other off their horses. Hehe. Losers.

"Cloud! Damn it, leave me and _Lightning_ alone!" Tidus could be heard shouting.

"No way _Ken_!" Cloud replied and snickered.

"Whatever!" Squall laughed. Whoa, wait. Squall laughed?

"Hey, shut up Squall!" Cloud growled.

"How do you know what he said?" Wakka wondered.

"I don't, but I could tell he was making fun of me in some way!" Cloud replied. Squall anime sweat dropped.

"God, they are so dumb," Tifa finally said after watching them.

"Let's go through our own trail...see if we can find any pretty water falls!" Rinoa suggested.

"I don't know...that seems like a bad idea," Aeris replied.

"Shut the fuck up Aeris and for once in your life stop being so cautious!" Tifa snapped. She and Rinoa headed to their right. Yuna looked nervously up at Aeris, past her to Vincent all the way up ahead, and back to the guys.

"Grr...I'm sure Tidus can survive ten minutes without me," Yuna finally said and followed Tifa and Rinoa. Aeris followed awhile later grumbling. They rode awhile and looked at the pretty plants and stuff.

"Guys...let's go back now...the others might be worrying," Aeris said worriedly.

"Ha! They probably haven't even noticed yet," Tifa replied.

"Hey look! A pretty flower," Rinoa said to herself. She got off her horse and walked towards it. Tifa and Aeris were still arguing when a yelp cut them off. "Owww! Heeelp!" Rinoa wailed. Yuna, Aeris, and Tifa got off their horses and ran to where Rinoa was.

"Rinoa, what happened?" Yuna asked.

"Gah...I saw a flower and went to go see it...and I tripped over a stupid tree root," Rinoa replied. Tifa and Yuna tried to help her up, while Aeris drummed her fingers together nervously.

"See? I knew something bad would happen!" She said frantically.

"Shut-up Aeris!" Tifa growled. Suddenly Rinoa gave off a yelp of pain.

"Argh...it's my ankle. I think I twisted it," She announced. Yuna blew away a strand of hair from her face irritably.

"This is just _great_," She said sarcastically. Tifa helped Rinoa sit down and extend her leg.

"Somebody go back to the guys, tell them we're here and we need help," Tifa ordered. Yuna and Aeris looked at each other. "What?" Tifa asked.

"Where exactly ARE the guys?" Yuna wondered. An owl hooted as they all looked around.

"Um...and where are our horses?" Aeris asked. The horses were gone.

"The horse guy is soooo gonna sue us!" Rinoa cried in despair. Yuna started pacing back and forth.

"Think happy, think happy, think happy, think happy, think happy," She muttered over and over again biting her thumb nail. Aeris and Tifa looked at each other then back at Yuna. "We're doomed!" Yuna suddenly cried and fell to her knees.

"Oh gee we are!" Aeris cried and her hands flew up to her face in horror.

"Alright, alright, just everyone shut up and calm down!" Tifa ordered angrily. They all looked at her. "Aeris will stay here with Rinoa, Yuna and I will try and find our way back. Understood?" Tifa asked. Everyone nodded and Yuna and Tifa headed out.

* * *

Meanwhile...

"Hey guys...haven't you noticed its gotten kinda...silent?" Zell asked. They stopped and looked around.

"Nah!" Tidus and Cloud replied in unison. Suddenly they saw Vincent trotting over to them.

"Argh! You guys are such _idiots_!" He cried.

"Hey, what for?" Tidus wondered.

"Can't you see? The girls got lost! I was up there finding our trail and you guys couldn't even look after the girls?" Vincent snapped. Everyone finally noticed the girls were gone.

"Heh...it's their own dumb fault...they shouldn't have run away!" Sephiroth growled.

"Well...it's not _really_ their fault...they don't know any better," Cloud added. Everyone nodded solemnly.

"Look, we just gotta go find them," Vincent ordered and got off his horse.

"Why? They were useless anyway," Sephiroth grumbled.

"Hey man! That means Yuna is lost! I have to go find her," Tidus said and got off his horse too. Everyone else reluctantly got off.

"Where do we tie the fucking horses?" Sephiroth demanded.

"Just leave them, they're not important right now," Vincent replied and headed off.

"Hey, how do _you_ know where they are?" Cloud asked following Vincent.

"I don't," Vincent replied bluntly. Everyone kinda spread out and started calling out for the girls. After awhile or so, they didn't have any luck.

"Oh God! We're doomed! Without the women I can't _survive_!" Cloud cried out in despair and fell on his knees. Everyone shifted their eyes and looked at each other, then back at Cloud on the ground.

"Get back up you sissy," Sephiroth growled. "We'll find them, not if I can help it!" Sephiroth then cut a tree clean in half. For...no...apparent...reason. Tidus started whistling.

"What are you doing now?" Vincent asked plugging his ears.

"Yuna and I have this thing where if we get lost we whistle. Don't worry, we'll find them in no time!" Tidus cried happily and continued whistling. Sephiroth got annoyed by the noise.

"Hey Blondie, why don't you just buy her a freakin' dog whistle? She'll come much faster," Sephiroth sneered. Cloud laughed and pointed at Tidus.

"Hey! Shut-up man!" Tidus snapped. Everyone else chuckled sneeringly. Hehe.

"Yeah! Or maybe get her a tracking collar...you two will never get separated again!" Cloud cried and laughed harder.

"This is really getting old...," Tidus muttered.

"Or, like, implant a tracking system in her brain while she sleeps!" Zell suggested and he and Cloud laughed more.

"Alright the joke's over!" Sephiroth snapped and they stopped laughing. Tidus whistled one last time before giving up.

"Ah...hope is lost...," He said and hung his head.

"Wait...what was that?" Inuyasha wondered. Everyone turned towards him.

"What is it Inuyasha? Did you hear something?" Vincent asked. Inuyasha barked happily and nodded.

"_Did ya pick up a scent dog boy_!" Sephiroth bellowed. Inuyasha whimpered and trotted over to Vincent.

"Sephiroth! Don't yell at poor Inuyasha like that! Aww...come here boy," Vincent said gently and petted Inuyasha. Sephiroth's fist shook with impatience. "Well boy? Did ya hear something?" Vincent asked kneeling down next to Inuyasha. Suddenly Inuyasha's ears perked up and his hand went up too and pointed towards the woods.

"He heard something! Alright! We can still maintain the world population, woohoo!" Cloud cried. Everyone looked oddly at Cloud who was punching his fist in the air, then turned to the woods. Inuyasha ran away.

"Bye Inuyasha...Goodbye!" Vincent called and waved. He flicked off a tear drop and turned boldly to the others. "Alright, let's move," He said and they walked forward. Tidus whistled again and then, they heard another whistle respond! Everyone cheered and ran that way.

* * *

"Tifa! I think I hear Tidus's whistle! _We're saved_!" Yuna cried happily and started running in that direction. Tifa let out a breath of relief. Yuna whistled, heard one back louder, and clapped in joy. Tifa looked at her weirdly and shook her head. They ran until they got to a clearing. Yuna whistled again and Tidus whistled a few yards away. "This is so exciting!" She cried.

Tidus broke through the bushes with everyone else following him a moment later.

"_Tidy_!" Yuna yelled.

"Babe!" He cried back. They ran into each other and hugged. "I can't believe you got lost babe, what was with that?" Tidus asked.

"Long story...," Yuna grumbled. Tifa gave off a sigh of relief as she saw everyone come through to the clearing.

"I never thought I'd be this happy to see all you guys," She said.

"World population, _saved_!" Cloud cried and nudged Wakka. Wakka shifted his eyes and stepped sideways, away from Cloud.

Sephiroth watched Yuna and Tidus, disgusted. "It's only been a freakin' 20 minutes!" He snapped.

"Heh, no matter how long, we all saw Sephy get a little desperate there," Cloud replied. Everyone laughed. Sephiroth snarled and turned his back on everyone.

"Whatever...," Squall said in a scared voice.

"Huh?" Tifa asked.

"Oh! Tifa! He must mean Rinoa! Oh gosh, we forgot. C'mon guys, we need to show you where they are," Yuna said and untangled herself from Tidus.

They walked down to where Tifa and Yuna had come from. They came to Rinoa and Aeris and they could be seen holding leaves like cards.

"Go fish," Rinoa said in a bored voice. Aeris picked up a leaf from a small pile near her knee.

"Guys! We're back!" Tifa exclaimed. Aeris looked up and wiped her forehead.

"Oh, what a relief!" She said and got up.

"Squally!" Rinoa cried out and threw her arms up like a two year old asking to be picked up.

"Whatever, whatever, ever?" Squall asked. He helped Rinoa get up and she leaned on him while standing on one leg.

"Oh, yeah, I twisted my ankle tripping on a damn tree root," Rinoa grumbled.

"Oh my gosh! What if you can't be maid of honor anymore?" Yuna exclaimed.

"Oh no!" Rinoa wailed.

_Then I can be maid of honor..._, Yuna thought evilly. Squall patted Rinoa's hand.

"Guys, let's go find our way back now...it's getting dark out," Cloud said looking up and rubbing his arms from the cold.

Will they be able to find their way back? Will Rinoa's ankle get magically healed and is she still in the running for Maid of Honor..._if_ they ever get back?... To make it to the wedding? Where _did_ those horses disappear to anyway? Will Sephiroth just end up killing them all?

* * *

Music Credit : "Born to be Wild" - Steppenwolf

Characters: Square Enix

My Message to You: Tune in for the next chapter to find out what happens!

End of Chapter 1


	2. Chapter 2: Teens Lost In the Woods

Chapter 2

**In 2005 a group of Final Fantasy characters got lost in the woods, due to a tragic horse back riding incident that caused them to end up in the middle of the woods with no idea how to get back. Though myth says they made it back all right, though nobody is sure yet, someone from that group so happened to have a video camera with full batteries and recorded a documentary until the day of their rescue while in the woods. The following documentary footage was found a year later by a following hunter, and now can be viewed by the public. **

* * *

An owl hooted in the distance. Yuna shuddered and hugged Tidus's arm.

"This is messed up, how the hell are we supposed to get back in the dark?" Cloud grumbled. Everyone was in a huddled group, trembling with the cold, and watching helplessly as the sky darkened ever so quickly up above.

"Those damn owls won't stop fucking hooting," Sephiroth hissed. Another owl hooted and he clenched his fist.

"I'm getting really scared now," Yuna stammered.

"God...me too," Rinoa agreed. All the girls nodded.

"Don't worry girls, I'll protect you," Cloud assured them proudly.

"Yeah, or most likely make our situation worse," Tidus muttered. Cloud glared at him.

"Shut up you sissies, you won't protect anyone at anytime, you're all too busy being sissies," Sephiroth growled. Vincent sighed.

"Will all of you just be quiet? We'll all stick together. This isn't some video game...this is _real_," Vincent replied. Tidus and Cloud still glared at each other slightly and then looked forward again. Suddenly Squall tripped over something and Rinoa almost fell on her bad ankle.

"Ow! What happened?" Rinoa asked.

"Whatever...?" Squall asked. Cloud bent down and inspected what Squall had tripped on. Since it was dark, he couldn't really tell what it was.

"It looks like some kind of backpack...," Cloud announced. Tidus went over and kicked it.

"Whatever it is, it's not alive," Tidus noted. Cloud slapped his forehead.

"Of course it's not alive! It's a back-pack!" Cloud cried. Vincent felt around it and found a zipper.

"It _is _a back-pack of some sort...maybe we'll find some useful stuff in here...?" Vincent asked plying around inside it. Vincent felt around for hopefully a flash light, and found something that felt like it. But when he turned the switch up to light it, it gave off a weak glow, then slowly turned off. "Damn it...the batteries are low," Vincent announced. Everyone groaned.

"I think I found a blanket or something...," Cloud said and took out a wide canvas sheet of some kind.

"That's no blanket, Cub Scout of the Year. It's a tent," Sephiroth snarled.

"A tent? Oh my gosh, this is so incredibly lucky!" Yuna cried out.

"We'll need light to set it up," Vincent said.

Sephiroth took a lighter from his pocket. "I have this," He announced.

"You have a lighter? Do you smoke or something?" Cloud asked.

"No! This is incase of the emergency that I'm stuck in the woods with a group of idiots," Sephiroth replied.

"Well we're not using _your_ lighter...mine's cooler," Vincent said cooly and took out his own lighter. It was a miniature gun, and when he pulled the mini trigger flame shot up out of the hole thing where bullets come out to shoot people. It's so magical. "Alright everyone, gather up some leaves or something...let's see if we can start a fire," Vincent ordered.

Everyone except Yuna reluctantly started picking up leaves and twigs and junk. "Won't you be of any help at all?" Vincent asked Yuna.

"I'm not touching dirty dead leaves. Like, ew," Yuna replied and took out a nail filer. After they started up a fire, the guys struggled with the tent awhile and finally put it up.

"It's a little...lopsided...," Vincent noted looking at it. It was way lop sided actually.

"Argh! I'm not trying to put it up again, I'm bad at this camping stuff," Cloud cried. Sephiroth went over to it and started whacking at it with his Masamune.

"What the fuck are you doing!" Cloud cried shrilly.

"Fixing the damn thing...you sissies...," Sephiroth replied. Suddenly the tent came back up right. Everyone stared at it in disbelief. "There. Now...all of you..._Leave me alone_!" Sephiroth snarled and walked away. Tidus came out of nowhere then and rolled another log to the fire.

"There! Now it can be just like in the movies!" He declared happily. He turned to everyone else while sitting on the log. "Does anyone have any marsh mellows on them by any chance?" He asked.

"What do _you _think?" Cloud asked sarcastically and sat at a log. Everyone sat around the fire.

"What do we do now?" Wakka asked.

"Well...we wait until morning...then we should try and find our way back," Vincent replied.

"I hope by then somebody notices we're gone," Tifa said miserably and held her head in her hands.

"Auron will definitely notice...won't he?" Yuna asked.

"Well...he_ did_ say we wouldn't be seeing him until the wedding...I don't know if he'll know that we're gone...," Cloud replied. Yuna's eyes widened.

"Noooo!" She moaned. Tidus patted her shoulder.

"Don't worry Yuns, we'll be back home in no time," Tidus re assured her.

Three days later...

* * *

Nah...just kidding.

When everyone got more or less tired of just sitting there and watching the fire miserably, the problem came up on who would sleep in the tent.

"I'm definitely sleeping in the tent," Yuna said right away.

"I think all the girls should sleep in the tent," Cloud said, surprisingly noble.

"Why? Girls aren't tough enough to sleep outside in the woods?" Tifa snapped.

"Fine Tifa, if you want to sleep outside then I'll switch ya, I don't want bugs in my hair anyway!" Cloud fired back.

"Ok, ok! Look, all the girls sleep in the tent, Cloud you're staying outside," Vincent ordered.

"But Tifa doesn't want to sleep in the tent!" Cloud protested.

"Of course I do you idiot, I was just making a point!" Tifa cried.

"Will you guys stop fighting?" Rinoa pleaded. Cloud grumbled and walked away from the tent. Yuna was already in the tent and claiming her spot. She hummed and sprayed bug spray all over the place.

"Hey Yuna, would ya spray some of that stuff in my hair?" Cloud asked.

"Cloud, no bugs are going to go in your hair," Vincent sighed.

"They'll get killed by the fumes five feet away before anyway," Tidus sneered.

"Yeah, yeah," Cloud muttered and lay his head on the back pack.

"Wasn't there anything else in that back pack?" Zell asked. Cloud opened it and looked around.

"I found some snack bars...a spoon...a coupon...a tooth pick... oh, and some scratchy blankets," Cloud said and took the blankets out. Vincent slapped his forehead. Everyone kinda sat around or laid by the fire.

"Hey...where's Sephiroth?" Tidus asked.

"Probably out killing some poor helpless animal," Cloud replied poking a stick in the ground. Everyone mumbled an agreement.

"Hey...if you could have any woman in the world...who would it be?" Tidus suddenly asked.

Cloud laughed evilly. "Wonder Woman!" He replied. Everyone else groaned.

"Tidus, this isn't some sleep over...," Vincent started.

"Whatever!" Squall agreed.

"So? We're all laying around in scratchy blankets lost in the middle of the woods. I have nothing else better to do," Tidus retorted.

"Bet you 500 gil the girls are talking about us too," Cloud said.

"Yeah...and magazines," Zell replied.

"And boy bands," Wakka added.

"And jellybeans, and stickers, and those pop-up books," Tidus added also. Everyone looked at him oddly.

"Anyway, I'd have Wonder Woman. She's my idol," Cloud confirmed.

"I can't picture you with Wonder Woman," Tidus said shaking his head.

"Hey, what about you Valentine?" Tidus asked Vincent.

"Or should wesay, Dracula Jr.?" Cloud snickered. "The guy called_ me _Spikes...how lame..."

"Yeah, and how exactly am I supposed to be Ken?" Tidus asked.

"They didn't give me _or_ Squall a nickname," Wakka declared proudly.

"Want one?" Cloud threatened. Wakka stuck his tongue out at him. "Anyway Tidus buddy, back to your original question, Vincent doesn't _want_ any girl," Cloud said.

"Cloud...," Vincent warned.

"Yeah...thought so...just wanted to see if he had imagination," Tidus replied, ignoring Vincent.

"Whatever?" Squall asked Vincent.

"I don't care...I really _don't_ want anyone," Vincent grumbled miserably.

"I think he and Yuna should pair up, what a sight that'd be," Cloud continued ignoring Vincent.

"What!" Tidus cried.

"Just mixing and matching dude, nothing serious. But wouldn't it be a pretty sight?" Cloud asked jokingly and he closed his eyes.

"No. Not at all," Tidus snarled.

"Opposites do attract," Cloud continued smirking to himself.

"_No they don't_!" Vincent and Tidus cried in unison. Wakka laughed.

Cloud raised an eyebrow. "Fine. I'll stay silent," He mused and closed his eyes again.

"You've just been spending way too much time out in the woods Strife. Now, lay off your fantasies and let us sane ones go to sleep," Tidus said and turned around.

"At least I _have _a last name to go by," Cloud suddenly spoke up and Tidus ignored him.

* * *

Meanwhile, in the girl's tent...

* * *

"Yuna, if you spray once more that perfume I'll kill you," Tifa threatened.

"It smells like squirrels in here!" Yuna protested. After a glare from Tifa, Yuna reluctantly put away her Summoner's Secret vanilla perfume.

"Geez, now let's get some sleep," Tifa grumbled and turned around facing the tent wall.

"I wanna talk about the boys though," Rinoa protested.

"Yeah, and magazines," Yuna added.

"And boy bands!"

"And jellybeans!"

"And stickers!"

"And not to mention those cute pop up books..."

Tifa growled.

"Guys, Tifa is right. We should all just go to sleep," Aeris said in a quiet voice.

"This isn't some sleep over you know," Tifa added from her corner. "We're stuck in the middle of the fucking woods."

Yuna and Rinoa shrugged. "Well, sweet dreams then," Yuna said and lay down looking up at the tent ceiling. Rinoa grumbled something and lay down as well on her stomach.

Tifa sighed and was about to fall asleep when Yuna uttered, "God...I just can't sleep."

"Me either," Rinoa's voice replied.

"If you can't sleep, then go outside!" Tifa hissed.

"Hey, no need to throw us out of the tent!" Rinoa replied.

"That's ok, I_ want_ to go outside," Yuna said haughtily and crawled over to the opening.

"Don't you even think of bringing Tidus in here," Tifa warned.

"Don't worry, I _won't _!" Yuna hissed and crawled all the way outside. Rinoa said good bye and closed the tent for her.

"The nerve of Tifa, seriously," Yuna muttered to herself and brushed herself off. She saw that the fire was dulled out and that it was hard to see who was sleeping where. Yuna stomped her foot silently and felt her way around. She stopped when she came upon a big boot.

"Whose there?" A sleepy voice asked.

"Er...Yuna. Is this Tidus?" She asked nervously. She couldn't tell. (She couldn't _tell _! Geez...)

"Uh, yeah, If you want me to be," The voice replied. Yuna punched the arm of the person.

"Grr, Cloud you're such an idiot! I knew it was you," Yuna replied. Cloud snickered. "Where's Tidus?" Yuna asked in a whisper.

"Don't know. To my left...right?...Not sure. You should _feel around _some more," Cloud replied. Yuna slapped the back of his head. "Ow! Ok, ok. He's right next to me," Cloud replied feeling out his hair. Yuna hastily crawled over there and lightly felt the person's hair.

"Ow! Gee, spiky. Ok this is Tidus," Yuna confirmed.

"Why are you out here anyway? Can...uh...I go in the tent?" Cloud asked.

"No! Tifa's in there. Remember?" Yuna replied. Cloud shuddered.

Yuna laughed at Cloud's reaction and shook Tidus. "Tidy, wake up," Yuna said softly.

"Five more...minutes...Mom," Tidus mumbled. Cloud muffled his snort.

"Tidus! It's me, Yuna!" Yuna said a bit louder.

"...But I _do _want the pancakes," Tidus replied in a whiny voice. Cloud down right started laughing now and Yuna glared at him. Yuna had no choice and slapped Tidus for him to wake up.

"Ow!" Tidus cried out and sat up right.

"Oh, sorry Tidy, you wouldn't wake up!" Yuna apologized. Tidus rubbed the side of his face.

"You didn't have to flippin' slap me Yuna!" He replied. Cloud laughed.

"She didn't have a choice. You were begging for p-p-pancakes!" Cloud sputtered and started laughing again. Tidus anime sweat dropped.

"Shut up Cloud, I'll video tape _you_ sleeping when I get the chance!" Tidus threatened. Cloud stopped laughing.

"Hey, everyone lied. I do _not _talk and walk in my sleep," Cloud replied crossing his arms. Yuna giggled. Cloud glared at her and lay back down.

"We better move away...or else we'll wake up finding our selves about to get killed by Cloud as he stands over us with a leaf and starts talking to himself," Tidus said and he and Yuna scooted over.

"I heard that!" Cloud cried and he faced his back to them.

And so night turned into day in the mysterious woods. Vincent was the first to wake up. He immediately started to re-light the fire with his gun lighter thing. He pushed the trigger and the flame ignited. He lit the fire and blew into it a while until it rose up bigger. Vincent sat quietly and gazed at the fire. He heard the shuffling of the others asleep around him, which caused him to look around at them. Just as his gaze fell upon Yuna and Tidus sleeping next to each other, the sound of the tent flap being thrown open set his gaze to go back immediately to the fire.

Tifa stretched and yawned and walked toward Vincent with a miserable expression. "I thought I was dreaming...but I guess it's really true that we're stuck in some forest," She said. Vincent just looked away and focused on a tree. Later Rinoa woke up, followed by Aeris.

"Rinoa, how's your ankle?" Tifa asked.

"Oh it's fine. I can walk and everything. I guess I can still be Maid of Honor!" Rinoa replied cheerfully.

"If we ever make it back," Cloud mumbled who had woken up and was rubbing his eyes.

"Huh, still no sign of Sephiroth," I'm pretty sure Squall said. They all sat or stood there silent, and watched as a squirrel climbed onto the face of the sleeping Zell. Cloud snorted but looked away. Zell twitched then opened his eyes.

"_Aaaaahh_!" He screamed and jumped up but the squirrel hung on, even as he ran around in circles to get it off. Everyone looked at each other and sort of sighed.

"Still no sign of Sephiroth, eh?" Tifa suddenly said. Squall looked annoyed but didn't say anything.

"Nope," Everyone replied in unison. Yuna and Tidus were still sleeping but Yuna woke up once Zell, who was still running around blind for there was a squirrel hanging on his face, tripped over her.

"Argh, Zell!" Yuna cried and shoved him off. He continued running around and screaming. Yuna stood up and looked around. "Where the heck am I?" She asked.

"Uh...you're in the woods...," Cloud replied.

"The woods? Which one? Do you mean the Macalania woods? We shouldn't be here around at this time...," Yuna said more to herself. Everyone shifted their eyes and looked at each other.

"The _what_ woods?" Cloud asked.

Yuna looked worried. "The...Macalania...woods...," She replied drumming her fingers together nervously.

Suddenly Squall laughed. Everyone looked at him with massive surprise.

"Did...Squall...just..._ laugh_?" Cloud asked incredulously.

"He laughs just like everyone else does!" Rinoa snapped defensively.

"No he doesn't," Cloud protested. But Squall had long since stopped.

"What was so funny sweetie?" Rinoa asked swooping over to him. Squall shifted his eyes. Everyone shifted _their _eyes and coughed simultaneously. Rinoa bent over to hear what Squall was whispering in her ear. "Oh...hahaha!" She suddenly cried. Everyone widened her eyes at her, so that she would tell them. "Oh...uh...he just said, Macalania sounded like a peanut...," Rinoa announced. There was a short silence.

Suddenly Cloud laughed. "He's right! Macalania peanut, come get your Macalanian peanuts!" He cried and slapped his knee. Everyone else (mind you that when I say 'Everyone else' It means everyone else, except usually Vincent or Sephiroth...because they don't count, as _everyone_ else) laughed nervously for awhile and it grew silent again.

"Well...are we?" Yuna asked again. "Wakka...do you know?" She asked a bit nervously and went over to him. Wakka backed away.

"Uh...don't ask me anything...ya," He replied.

"Why are you acting so strange? Why are _all_ of you acting so strange? Who are all of you anyway? Where am I? _Is this some kind of joke on the Summoner or something_!" Yuna exploded. Everyone stayed silent and stared at her with worried expressions.

"I think Yuna has gone mental," Cloud muttered to Tifa who nodded. Yuna started pacing back and forth wringing her hands, and everyone's eyes followed her like a tennis match or something.

"This is so wrong..._wrong_...who are these people to treat me this way? Where am I? Did I get kidnaped again? Where's Sir Auron and Lulu and...oh Yyevon..._Where's Tidus_?" Yuna was saying to herself and suddenly turned around facing everyone. Everyone pointed to the ground where Tidus was currently drooling while sleeping at the same time. Yuna ran over to him. "Tidus, Tidus! Wake up!" Yuna cried shrilly. When he wouldn't wake up Cloud suggested that she should probably leave him alone until he wakes up. Yuna glared at him. "Shut-up you stupid Al Bhed!" She snapped.

Cloud looked taken aback. "What?" He asked confused. He turned to everyone else who just shrugged in reply.

Tidus mumbled something then turned over. Yuna growled with impatience. She grabbed a loose tree branch and started whacking him with it. If this wasn't sad or true, it would be entirely funny and everyone would be laughing about now. But now they were just thinking that Yuna would most likely end up killing Tidus. Well, except for Zell, who was thinking more along the lines of "_Get this squirrel off my face_!"

Finally Tidus sat up and saluted. "Er...I mean...," He said and lowered his arm hastily.

"Tidus! Hurry, we have to run!" Yuna cried pulling his arm until he stood up.

"What?" He asked. Cloud was about to tell him something when Yuna pointed her tree branch at him threateningly. "Stand back or I'll summon all my aeons on you!" She cried. Cloud backed up hastily.

"Yuna, what in the name of Blitzball cheerleaders are you talking about?" Tidus asked alarmingly.

"They kidnaped us! All of them. That one looks Al Bhed," Yuna points at Cloud, " They might have taken Lulu and Auron hostage!" Yuna cried.

Tidus mouthed something to Cloud who was too scared to reply. He was busy eyeing the tree branch nervously. "Wait Yuna, uh...let me talk to them...," Tidus said and pried her fingers off his arm.

"Be careful!" She cried.

Tidus walked over to Cloud. "What in the name-," He started.

"I don't know! She woke up crazy like this, ask anyone!" Cloud cried shrilly.

"Yeah, he's right. I've just been too scared to say anything," Tifa added.

"Will Yunie be ok?" Rinoa asked on the verge of tears.

"I guess she thinks she's still in Final Fantasy X or something...by the way she's babbling like that...where's Wakka?" Tidus asked looking around.

"No way Mon, I'm not dealing with Yuna being mental. I already had to travel all those miles with her on that stupid pilgramage...you were there!" Wakka cried from up a tree.

"Wakka! You and I are the only ones she recognizes!" Tidus cried back angrily.

"First, just freakin' tell her I'm not an Al Bhed or whatever," Cloud said gazing at the tree branch again.

"Oh, right. Uh, hey Yuna! Cloud-or I mean, this guy, whose name is Cloud, whom I've known since high school," At this Cloud nods rapidly, " Isn't an Al Bhed, I repeat! He's not an Al Bhed!" Tidus cried over to Yuna.

"That's what he wants you to think!" Yuna snapped. Wakka laughed and pointed at Cloud.

"Hey man, you help out too!" Cloud cried swatting Wakka's hand away.

"Uh...what he said!" Wakka cried over.

Yuna bit her lip. "Well, I guess if Wakka says so...I believe you," Yuna replied.

"Uh, chuck the tree branch away too...," Cloud added.

"What tree branch?" Yuna asked looking around, while holding the tree branch with one hand like a staff.

Cloud anime sweat dropped. "Never mind, I guess," He muttered.

"Hello, I'm Tifa. I'm not an Al Bhed!" Tifa greeted cheerfully and extended her hand. Everyone watched puzzled. Yuna smiled.

"I'm Yuna! The Lady Summoner. Of course, you already knew _that_...," Yuna said shaking hands.

"Strife; _Cloud_ Strife," Cloud introduced himself cooly and nodded at her smirking. Tidus punched him on the shoulder. "Hey, It's not always your friend goes in a mental re-lapse and forgets who you are! Knowing she's mental while she doesn't is fun!" Cloud said to Tidus out of ear shot from Yuna. Tidus glared at him.

"Aeris," Aeris said cheerfully and shook hands with Yuna.

"Vincent Valentine, at your service Lady Summoner," Vincent said charmingly and bowing slightly. He kissed her hand and Cloud laughed nudging Tidus who turned red from anger. Yuna giggled but smiled at him all the same.

"I think that will be a-," Tidus was saying when Zell came running in. He was red in the face and panting, but the squirrel was gone.

"Knocking my head onto a tree until that squirrel came off was a really good idea!" Zell cried.

Yuna looked at him oddly. "He looks Al Bhed," She whispered to Tidus.

"Oh no, that's Zell, he's not Al Bhed, he's just..._ special _," Tidus explained looking at Yuna seriously.

"Oh...," She replied and turned back to Zell.

"Hi, I'm _Yu-na_," Yuna greeted as if talking to a deaf person.

Zell looked confused. "I already knew that," He said.

Yuna smiled at him. "Of course you did!" She replied and patted his head.

Rinoa came up with Squall to Yuna, looking very teary-eyed. "T-T-T-This is S-S-Squall, and I-I-I'm-," Rinoa started but then burst into tears. "I knew her since kinder garden, how could she f-f-forget m-me!" Rinoa sobbed onto Squall. Yuna looked confused and worried.

"Is she alright?" Yuna asked Squall. He just half nodded and turned to Tidus.

"Squall doesn't talk much-," Tidus started to explain.

"Yeah, because he's a _lo-ner_!" Cloud cut in mockingly and laughed. Squall glared at him. Rinoa ran to Tidus.

"M-M-Make her remember m-me! P-P-Please!" Rinoa cried.

Tidus scratched the back of his head, and went "Er..."

Yuna patted Rinoa's shoulder. "I'm sure I have met you somewhere, because you look familiar. But do you know how many people the Summoner meets everyday?" Yuna asked cheerfully.

"Tell me about it," Wakka muttered rolling his eyes.

"Alright, visiting time with the Summoner is over kiddies," Tidus said and started to push Yuna away.

"Where can I schedule a _private_ meeting?" Cloud asked casually sliding up to Yuna who looked a little disgusted and turned away. Tidus shoved Cloud from behind.

"No where! Now uh, Yuna let's go," Tidus said.

"And where do you think _you're_ gonna go?" Tifa asked. Tidus did a slitting throat motion towards Tifa who instantly shut up.

"Hey, look! Whose that fellow?" Yuna asked and pointed. Sure enough, Sephiroth had returned to them.

Vincent accidentally let out a sigh of relief, and everyone stared at him. He shifted his eyes. "Don't stare at me!" He snapped after awhile and turned away. Sephiroth trudged over to them eating what looked like a kabob of meat.

"Hey, what's that you're eating?" Zell asked while smelling the heavenly smell. "Smells like...hotdogs..." Zell started to drool and everyone stayed back a few paces from him.

"Not hotdog," Sephiroth replied while chewing the last piece, "Squirrel."

Everyone put on a disgusted face.

"We have food here, Sephiroth," Vincent said.

"Yeah, horrible kind. I want _meat_...," Sephiroth replied.

Yuna went up to him all happy like. "Hi! I'm Yuna!" She greeted and extended her hand. Tidus bit down on his finger nervously.

Sephiroth looked her up and down. "So I've heard...," He muttered. He started to walk away.

"Hey, don't walk away from your Summoner! I'm going to vanquish Sin you know!" She cried. Tidus bit down harder. Everyone seemed to be watching. Even Vincent. Sephiroth continued to walk away muttering dark things.

"How rude! Hey, you, don't walk away from me!" Yuna cried. Sephiroth stopped in his tracks. Zell breathed in and out of a brown paper bag.

"What did you say?" Sephiroth asked.

"That's right, you heard me, I am a High Summoner and you are to treat me like how I'm supposed to be treated. _Who do you think you are! _I greeted you personally and this is the greeting I get in _return _? You must clearly not be in the best state of mind right now. Apologize this instant!" Yuna ordered. Sephiroth turned around slowly. He walked up to Yuna. She stood her ground and frowned up at him.

"Nobody..._ Nobody _... Orders..._ Me _...Sephiroth...AROUND!" Sephiroth exploded. He made a movement Vincent knew all too well, while muttering, "You little ungrateful-"

"_Sephiroth, wait_!" Vincent cried just as Sephiroth was going to pull his sword out.

Sephiroth froze but his eye brow twitched with anger and his fist shook. "What...now..._ Valentine_ !" He asked.

"Sephiroth! You can't kill Yuna!" Vincent cried while pushing a complaining Yuna towards the safety of everyone else.

"She _ordered me around _Vincent...," Sephiroth replied menacingly.

"Sephiroth! Yuna isn't-," Cloud started to say but walked over to Sephiroth and Vincent so Yuna wouldn't hear. "-sane right now!" Cloud finished.

"You're finally noticing this _now_!" Erupted Sephiroth. Vincent slapped his forehead.

"No, not like that, I mean she's literally not right in the head!" Cloud cried.

"She thinks she's _still _in Final Fantasy X," Vincent explained calmly.

"I don't understand," Sephiroth replied in a huff.

"Sephiroth, can't you see? That's why she introduced herself to you, she had no idea who you _were_!" Tifa cried coming up also.

"She didn't know who we were either, except for Wakka and Tidus," Aeris added quietly but not bothering to get any closer to Sephiroth.

"So one desperate day in the woods turned her insane eh? What a weakling...," Sephiroth sneered.

"Don't take it out on her, and don't attempt to kill her either!" Vincent snapped.

"Why do _you_ care so much Valentine?" Sephiroth growled.

"It's not only him, we all care for Yuna!" Tifa snapped back poking Sephiroth on the chest.

Sephiroth followed her finger then glared at her menacingly. "Fine. I won't do anything..._hurtful_," He said in a mocking tone. He walked over to the fire and started to sharpen his Masamune and grumbled things under his breath.

"What's the deal with him anyway?" Yuna asked.

"He was abused as a child," Tidus explained simply, shrugging a shoulder.

Cloud, Tifa, and Vincent retreated back to the side of the camp everyone was on.

"Don't talk to him. He's not in the best mood right now," Vincent told Yuna and walked ahead.

"Yeah, like he's ever in a _good_ mood," Tifa added.

"He's evil, Yunie, you can't go near him," Cloud explained.

Yuna glared at Sephiroth, then turned to her newly attained friends. "It was nice meeting all of you. But I must be going with my guardians to our next stop...right?" She asked inquiringly turning to Tidus and Wakka.

"Suuure...," Wakka replied.

"Yuna...we're kinda staying here for awhile...," Tidus tried explaining to the best of his ability.

"Yeah I know, we're stuck in the middle of the fucking woods," Yuna suddenly replied in her usual bold tone, and not her soft nice one anymore.

"Huh?" Tidus asked, appalled that sweet Final Fantasy X Yuna just cussed.

"So, when are we getting out of here? Should we start walking or something? I don't wanna miss Auron's wedding," Yuna continued and made her way over to the tent. Everyone looked at each other and shifted their eyes again.

"Did...Yuna just come back to normal?" Cloud asked.

"Normal? When was I ever not normal?" Yuna asked him angrily turning around.

"Uh...Never...," Cloud replied nervously.

"Yuna, do you want to take a nap or something?" Rinoa asked comfortingly whilst going up to her.

"Yeah...actually...I do feel rather tired-," She started but then fell right asleep. Tidus caught her before she fell and told Rinoa to take her in the tent.

"Whoa...Yuna is like, totally scaring me," Cloud said once Yuna was safely inside the tent sleeping, and Rinoa had returned.

"What the fuck was wrong with her anyway!" Sephiroth cried from his post at the fire.

"I can't explain it," Tidus began and everyone turned to him. "It's this thing she has-"

"You mean Yuna is mentally challenged or something?" Cloud asked. "Hey everyone! Tidus is dating a retard!"

"_No_!" Tidus cried.

"God, everyone in Final Fantasy X is messed up," Sephiroth muttered. (Heh. So true)

"I say we look at the map, since there's enough daylight, and plan our way to civilization while Lady Yuna sleeps," Vincent suggested quietly taking the map from his pocket.

"_You had the damn fucking map all along?_" Cloud exploded.

"As I said, now that we have daylight, we can research it properly," Vincent replied annoyed. Everyone agreed and aimlessly walked around or sat around the camp. Vincent, Sephiroth, Cloud, and sometimes Tidus argued over the map and tried to plan something. So this is it for Part 1 of Chapter 2 . What the heck is wrong with Yuna? Will she turn crazier the more they stay in the woods? What do the squirrels have against Zell? Will they ever make it back? How did Rinoa's ankle magically heal anyway?

* * *

Intermission. Feel free to grab food, relieve yourself of the Nature's Call, and sharpen your own Fan girl Sephiroth Masamune. Trust me. You'll need it.

* * *

Yuna's eyebrows furrowed in concentration and she moved over uncomfortably. Finally she just opened her eyes and saw that she was inside a tent. She was laying down, and as she yawned she realized that she had been asleep. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, then tried to focus her eyes sleepily while staring at her knees. She sighed and looked around at the small tent, and decided to go outside. She opened the tent flap and looked outside to a silent forest, the aroma of pine trees easily distinguishable. She stood up outside and worriedly twisted a strand of hair, looking around.

"Hello?" She called. There was no one around. Nothing moved or stirred, it was so silent it started to creep Yuna out. "Helloooo...where is everyone?" She called a little louder. Her stomach started to sink, and she finally moved from her spot from in front of the tent. She ran a few feet forward, back, and in all directions calling out. But nothing answered back. Now Yuna's chin trembled and she breathed quickly, and called out more shrilly.

"Tidus! Cloud! Vincent! Rinoa! Wakka! Anyone! _Where are you guys_?" She called out shrilly and desperately, her throat scratchy from the first symptom as she was about to start crying. She whimpered slightly and ran forward to a tree, backing up against it she called louder one more time everyone's name. Tears were already forming from the corner of her eyes and streaming seconds later as she looked around nervously and hurriedly, but nothing moved or answered her. Yuna let out a sobbed gasp as the empty forest woods, the thousands of trees everywhere, became a blur and she slowly sank down because her side was hurting from nerves, and her heart was beating fast and was ringing in her ears.

After awhile she sniffed her tears and rose half way up, leaning on the tree for support. In a shaky voice she called out again but like the other times, she got no reply and the trees seemed to watch her sternly. "What happened to them!" She sobbed out and leaned her head against the tree, whimpering softly. She began to rake the tree with her nails, over and over again and barely felt the pain that came from the splinters digging in under her nails.

"They're gone...They're all gone..."

Yuna repeated that until a sharp stab of something made her gasp out suddenly, and she scratched the tree harder, crying.

"T–T-Tidus...," She murmured. And she began full on sobbing now, her hands now off the tree and now covering her face.

"_He's gone_..."

She sank down now squatting, and sobbed into her hands. "T-T-T-Tidus is gone!" She choked out and removing her hands she started staggering forward on her knees, then falling on all fours and crawling through the leaves and forest ground. "Tidus...," She repeated again and crawled over to a clear spot, with no trees. She moved into a fetal position and began crying quietly until she thought she heard a rustle.

"Tidus?" She sat up hurriedly and looked around, but there was nothing. "_Tidus_!" She cried out shrilly but again, no answer. Her heart jumped and she heard another rustle, then another, among the leaves. Her hands flew to her chest and she whimpered quietly. Her eyes were irritated from crying, and dry. She couldn't wipe them because her hands were dirty with dirt, but another rustle, closer, caused her to look up alertly and gaze unfocused again at the same blur of trees.

She staggered and struggled to stand up, but as she did she heard more rustles. "_Whose there_?" She shrieked and clasped her hands around the base of her neck. The rustles could be heard behind her, and she spun around. She saw a limp form moving forward, and at first she thought it was a giant grey worm. She gasped and her hands flew up to her head, grasping her hair.

The form was a person, in ragged, grey clothes. It was a man, and he started to moan as he crawled forward, causing the leaves to rustle. His eyes were blood shot, his teeth yellow and a lot were missing. His legs were crushed and bloody and his trucker hat covered half his face when he looked down to crawl farther. "What the heck!" Yuna shrieked and backed away whimpering more, away from the man.

"Help...," The man moaned, and his eyes fixed on Yuna, pleading for help.

"I-I can't...I-I c-can't help you," Yuna gasped hoarsely and continued to back away. She cried louder as the man suddenly groaned and looked up at the sky, then his head fell against the ground hard, and he remained limp for many minutes. Yuna sobbed and sobbed and turned around, starting to run what she could. After a few staggering feet she stopped and groaned with pain from her side and her chest, which her heart was beating way too fast against.

"You're only a little girl," Came a sudden voice. Yuna gasped and spun around, to find an old man staring at her with cold grey eyes. He had his hands behind his back, and he stood up straight in an old grey suit attire. He stared at her directly, through her soul, and never blinked. "Little girls shouldn't be running around the woods alone," He said rather quietly, but Yuna could hear him clearly.

"Tidus," She said and stared at him pleadingly, "Where's Tidus?"

"Little girls shouldn't be running around here. There's a monster in the woods."

"P-P-Please...Where's Tidus...Please...," Yuna pleaded and started to cry again.

"You shouldn't be alone in the woods," The man said again, with his un blinking eyes, slowly bulging from their sockets.

"_Please! Where's Tidus_?" Yuna shrieked and started to get angry. "_Where is he?" _Shestood firm though her whole self was shaking but she focused her tear swelled eyes upon the old man. The man didn't answer and Yuna got desperate. "W-W-Where is h-h-he...," She choked out and found her numb legs sinking her low again until she was on her knees.

"Where...Where...," She murmured repeatedly and started to scoop up the dead leaves with her hands and slamming them back down. She started repeating the word faster and faster and rummaged through the leaves desperately, as if Tidus was going to appear out of them. "Where! Where! Where!" She cried sobbing and flung the leaves everywhere angrily.

"Stop," The old man ordered quietly and Yuna looked up at him, but her hands wouldn't stop scooping the leaves and slamming them, but they started doing so more slowly until finally she stopped and her arms hung limply at her sides and she continued staring at the old man.

"Please...Help me...Help...," She said and she couldn't take the burning of the old man's eyes any longer. She stretched her arms in front of her through the leaves and lay her head down against the ground. "I need help," She said meekly and sniffed back tears. "Help me...," She repeated and suddenly sat back up, but only looking at the ground below her. "I want Tidus," She continued saying to herself. "I'd do anything."

Her eyes darted over the ground and she waited for the old man's response. But there was none. She looked up slowly to gaze back to the same empty forest, the same trees everywhere, not a sound to be heard. The old man had disappeared. "I can't be alone," Yuna said to herself and got up. "I can't be alone in the woods." She turned around to a particular side of the forest and started walking that way. She walked, gazing at the ground only, watching the many leaves pass under her. She thought she heard a sort of whisper at her ear and flung it off with her hand, as if to swap a mosquito. She walked faster. More whispers came, like empty whistles buzzing pass her ear. She swatted at nothing in particular angrily and started to run.

The more the whispers came, rushing past her, the faster she ran. She started to scream pleadingly and whimper, her screams shaky, with her dry throat and eyes and her side hurting from the running. She ran through bushes, running through them and between trees blindly, screaming with her arms stretched out in front of her as if to protect her. She'd scream, get choked off, and sob and then scream more in that cycle, and saw more and more streaks of red appear on her arms as the branches of the bushes scratched her. The bushes disappeared and a clearing stood before her, and she whimpered wringing her hands as she came to a slow walk and tried to focus with her blurred vision.

There were a series of twigs hanging from the branches and there were twigs hanging and glued to _these _twigs and they seemed to form a figure. These figures were hanging all over and Yuna stared at each one, frightened and her heart beat faster and faster the more figures she saw.

"What do they mean?" Yuna murmured in thought out loud to herself. The figures never seemed to stop. They went on and on, and as a faint wind came they all swung at the same time. A fog seeped in and Yuna saw no end to the disturbing figures so she decided to turn another way. But every single way was like the others; all the trees with those figures hanging loosely, and some had the figures drawn on the trees in red.

"Where am I!" Yuna shrieked and ran blindly forward, covering her head with her arms and crying loudly. She couldn't see anything, because she didn't want too. She didn't want to see the trees, the figures, or the fog. Amazingly she didn't run into any trees, and her steps on the leaves echoed loudly through the silence. With a frightened whimper, she decided to look up and orient herself. The trees were long gone, the normal ones anyway, and now Yuna saw herself facing a stone run down house. Half its roof was gone, and it was patched with half stone, half brick blotches and fog surrounded all sides of it. Gnarled and dead looking trees were the only other things around the house, but other then that, the fog limited what you could see at a distance. She pushed her hair behind her ears so she had it off her face, and hugged herself from the cold the fog brought in.

"Hello...?" She called quietly, for that was all her throat could muster. An owl hooted, but nothing else seemed to be alive. She walked towards the house and knocked on the moss over grown door, which opened with a creak slowly. She trembled and her teeth chattered as she made her way inside, her whole stomach flying up to her throat as the door slammed closed with a _bam_.

"An-Any-An-Anyone t-t-there?" She called and looked around the house. It was completely bare, it didn't even have a floor with the forest ground visible beneath Yuna's feet.

"You're only a little girl. And your lost in the woods. This is a dangerous time, you shouldn't be running around alone in the woods," Replied a familiar cold voice. The man appeared at a dark corner and walked one step closer, his hands still behind his back, his attire the same, and the same bulging burning grey eyes staring hard through Yuna.

"P-P-Please...help...I'm c-c-cold," Yuna said with a hoarse voice. Her lips had grown cold and she felt numb.

"You haven't listened...you aren't to be running around in the woods alone," The old man said ignoring her. Yuna couldn't speak, her voice was gone and her lips were too cold. She began hyper ventilating slightly and as the old man's eyes burned into hers a steaming heat ran down her face, almost burning her for it was her tears streaming down her cold face.

"Too late. You'll soon join everyone Yuna," The old man said. Yuna managed a confused look and continued rubbing her arms for warmth.

"H-H-How...?" Yuna started but trailed off.

"You'll soon join everyone Yuna. It's about time...," The old man continued. There was a pause while Yuna struggled to say one word.

"T-T-T-Tidus...Tidus," Yuna said and gulped.

"He too. You'll soon join everyone Yuna. You'll join Tidus. They've all been waiting patiently for your arrival. It's your time as well. You'll soon join everyone Yuna, and it will all be over. Soon, it will all be over...," The old man said and his voice seemed to fade, as if he couldn't talk more and had to wait for his next chance to speak.

"N-N-N-No," Yuna replied and suddenly she got desperate again, and as the tears forced themselves fiercely down her face she shook her head furiously and backed away.

"No!"

She opened the door, slammed it closed on the old man's face, and ran outside. She tripped over a large rock sticking out of the ground and fell on all fours. When she looked up the old man was staring over her.

"It will all be over soon Yuna," He repeated. A huge noise seemed to drown all else and Yuna covered her ears. It was a deafening crash and rush of water, and Yuna cried out in fright as she saw a huge wave appear from above the dark trees.

"No!" Yuna cried and ran through the old man. After staggering slightly from the shock of passing through him, like dipping head first into freezing cold water, Yuna continued to run and came to a tall stone wall. "No! No! No!" She cried and stomped her foot, angry tears getting her wet all over again. She gasped out sobs and looked up to the wave coming closer and found the old man nowhere. She repeated the word "No" over and over again, her voice starting out angry and sobbed until it got choked to a murmur but she still repeated it endlessly.

She leaned on the wall and slid all the way down, muttering, "No, no, no," as she tearfully watched the wave coming closer. Though it still had more distance to cover before it reached Yuna, she felt her breathing get choked off as if already covered in water. She gasped and waved her arms around, as if trying to swim upward. But her eyes told her that she was still outside, with the trees and the fog and the stone house clearly visible. There was no sight of water anywhere, but Yuna still felt the sensation. Suddenly her vision got blurred, she felt light headed, and she felt her lungs exploding.

_So this is what it feels like to drown_..., Yuna thought sadly as everything seemed to turn bright and then fade away. But in this moment of peace as Yuna drowned, or felt like she was drowning, she suddenly got angry, and desperate again. She fought her way around the whiteness, churning and twisting around, and though she couldn't hear herself she was forcing herself to yell Tidus's name.

* * *

"Tidus! Tidus!" Yuna cried and twisted around.

"Yunie! Yunie, wake _up_, you're having a _night mare_!" Rinoa cried and shook Yuna awake.

"Huh?" Yuna said more calmly and opened her eyes. She was back in the tent and it was as if everything was starting over again. She started breathing hard. "No, no, Tidus!" She cried and ran out of the tent.

"_Yunie_!" Rinoa cried and got out of the tent to see where she was headed. Like in the night mare, there was no one at the camp and Yuna started to get that sinking feeling again.

"_Tidus_!" She shrieked.

"Yuna! It's ok he's right-," Rinoa started but Cloud, Tidus, Vincent and Sephiroth re-appeared from where they were talking and came to see why Yuna was shrieking.

"Yuns!" Tidus cried and ran over to her.

"What's going on, why is she shrieking like that?" Cloud asked Rinoa.

"I don't know! She was fast asleep and I was just checking up on her, then she started twisting around and I got scared 'cause it was like watching something from _The Exorcist_ or something, then she started yelling for Tidus, woke up, and ran outside!" Rinoa explained hurriedly.

"Tidus! Tidus, Tidus...," Yuna repeated as Tidus ran over to her and hugged her.

"What in the name of being stranded in the forest with idiots happened to her? Again?" Sephiroth demanded.

"Can't you see we don't know yet?" Cloud growled.

"Yuna, you gotta tell me what happened," Tidus told her breaking apart.

"Everyone had gone...," Yuna said meekly but she couldn't say anymore because of the shock of fearing that the night mare was starting over again. She sat down on a log to regain her breath and convince herself that she was awake, and that everyone including Tidus was here, and that all those realistic things she went through was only a night mare. Cloud and Vincent went over, Cloud sitting next to Yuna, Vincent standing back a distance, and Rinoa sitting on Yuna's other side and patting her arm.

"Yuna, what kind of a night mare did you have?" Cloud asked, but Yuna gave him a wide eyed frightened expression so Cloud shut up after Tidus glared at him.

"Geez, look at her, she's all shaking and pale, guys, give her some breathing space!" Tidus cried and everyone hastily backed off a little. Yuna's chin trembled along with her body and she started to cry quietly.

"Oh Yunie, don't cry!" Rinoa said worriedly.

"Whose crying?" Tifa asked coming back with Aeris, Squall, and Wakka from somewhere.

"Yuna. She's been traumatized by a night mare," Tidus explained worriedly.

"Really? Oh, Yuna, you ok?" Tifa asked squatting down next to Yuna and looking at her thoughtfully. Yuna half nodded and looked at Tidus with pleading eyes.

"Uh...guys, move," He said and pushed Tifa out of the way who glared at him afterwards for doing so. He and Yuna walked away to a tree, out of everyone's earshot, and sat there talking.

"So, she's gonna spill it all to Tidus and not us?" Tifa asked angrily.

"Well...that's pretty understandable...," Rinoa replied wringing her hands. They all sat around and waited.

"Why did she get traumatized?" Cloud asked. Rinoa shrugged.

"Probably due to past experiences," Vincent explained calmly from behind Cloud.

"That makes sense...," Tifa said looking up in understanding.

"Of course it does, I wasn't surprised at all when any of this happened," Vincent replied promptly.

"What, do you like, stalk Yuna and know all about her?" Cloud asked him suspiciously.

Vincent shifted his eyes. "No!" He retorted and looked away.

Tidus came back to them and they looked up. "Yeah...give her some space...she'll get over it...," He said awkwardly and walked away. Cloud took out the map again and they all tried to help in this time so they can get the heck out of there. Nobody noticed Vincent walk away from them quietly and head towards Yuna through the back of her tree.

Yuna was leaning against the tree, breathing in and out calmly, and resting her hands on her lap as she tried to become relaxed.

"You doing ok?" Vincent asked out of nowhere. Yuna jumped and spun her head towards him, then turned away breathing in and out louder. "Oh...gee, sorry," Vincent apologized hurriedly and scratched the back of his head. He sat down next to Yuna and there was a moment of silence while Yuna eased her breathing slightly then sat up straighter against the tree. "You feeling better now?" Vincent asked.

"Yeah...," Yuna replied and nodded firmly. She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and looked rather nervous still, so Vincent looked at her worriedly. "I-I just...," She said noticing Vincent's gaze, "I just feel stupid that's all. Letting a disturbingly realistic dream get to me and scaring everybody out like that, worrying Tidus...," Yuna trailed off then she bit her bottom lip.

"Oh...well, you did scare us...but don't think you're stupid, because you're not...," Vincent said awkwardly. Yuna shrugged.

"You must be the only one to think so then, given my reputation," Yuna replied admittedly.

"What? Yuna, your reputation doesn't say anything of you being dumb...besides, doesn't Tidus think your smart?" Vincent asked. Yuna decided not to answer. "Anyway...do you know why maybe you're being traumatized?" Vincent asked trying to change the subject.

"Yes...and no...mostly yes, I think," Yuna replied.

Vincent nodded. "Do you think it will stop soon?" He asked.

"Well, that's the thing, I think it'll stop as soon as I get out of my desperate and abandoned state of mind...which, also means as soon as we get out of these woods," Yuna replied quietly and slid down further down the tree.

"Yes, I agree-er, I mean, you know we're all nervous and feeling abandoned I mean, we _are_ stranded it's just...you seem to be taking it all more seriously then everyone else," Vincent replied, though he knew why.

"I know, I know...it's just...due to traumas and past experiences and stuff, it-it all got mixed and...well, it happens when I'm in a situation like this...you know, stranded in the woods is like the perfect kind of thing to happen to me to start me up," Yuna explained. "I just want it to go away, which means the faster we get out of these woods the better."

Vincent nodded in understanding and got up. "You seem to be talking, and breathing normally. You want to go back to everyone else and convince them that you're ok? That way we can all try this plan I-well, me and _some _help from Cloud I guess-that we came up with, and it might get us out of here," Vincent said.

Yuna nodded happily and Vincent took her hand for her to stand. She looked down to brush herself off, but when she looked up to thank him he disappeared. (Weird) Yuna looked around flustered and tried not to think of Vincent's sudden disappearance, similar to the one the old man in her dream kept doing and how it scared her. _Vincent's just weird like that, he can disappear at will I guess...can't Vampires do that?_ Yuna thought and smiled to herself.

Vincent re-appeared after seeing Yuna get ready to head back, and walked the long way back to the camp so no one would see him. Looking down at the ground, he ran smack face into Sephiroth. He looked up to Sephiroth's glare and backed off. Then Sephiroth started shaking his head and clicked his tongue. He pushed past Vincent and walked off.

"Oh, what? _What_?" Vincent cried but Sephiroth just shook his head and walked away.

Yuna walked back to everyone huddled at the same camp and everyone looked up and greeted her cheerfully. "Hello everyone," She greeted back and sat next to Tidus who put a comforting arm around her.

"You feeling better Yuna?" Cloud asked across from her.

"Yeah...I'm not insane right now or anything, so you guys can talk freely with me again," Yuna joked. Everyone laughed nervously.

"Anyway, we're planning to finally take this plan of a trail tomorrow morning so we can start bright and early and hopefully get somewhere," Cloud continued.

"Yes, so Yuna...if you're feeling alright tomorrow we're going to head out...so hopefully you'll be in a good state of mind to do so," Tifa added. Yuna nodded. After a few chats, it darkened and everyone got ready to sleep early for the event of finally going on a trail tomorrow.

"Hey guys...where's Zell?" Wakka asked absentminded as he climbed up to his tree branch that he slept in.

"Zell...hmm...as a matter of fact, I haven't seen him in hours," Aeris replied. Everyone agreed.

"The chicken-wuss was finally monster meat," Sephiroth growled casually like he was proposing to invite everyone to a nice dinner.

Everyone got scared and worried expressions.

"Don't worry...he should be back by tomorrow...I mean, knowing Zell he probably fell asleep or something or...well, maybe another squirrel attacked him and he hit his head against another tree a little too hard this time and fell un-conscious," Tidus suggested not helping much at all. Everyone stared at him. Tidus shifted his eyes and dove in the tent.

"Yunie, you'll be fine with only Tidus in the tent with you right?" Rinoa asked.

"What kind of a question is that!" Cloud demanded who was obviously annoyed by the fact that Tidus and Yuna got the tent to themselves.

"Yes, I'll be fine," Yuna said to Rinoa glaring at Cloud.

"I'd rather sleep outside, that tent was too stuffy anyway," Tifa convinced more to herself and tried to pick a spot of forest ground to lay down in. Cloud grumbled something about Tidus and Yuna always getting special treatment or something, and lay down again. And then that thing happened when the camera fast forwards in a cool like way showing the sun go down fast then rising up with like the cloud moving fast and stuff, and it was a new day.

But another day, means another chapter! So this is it for all of Chapter 2. Where did Zell go, and is he even alive? Will the perfectly planned trail work and will they make it out of the forest? Will Yuna go insane again, or have another weird dream? Who else will disappear after Zell? Did Yuna's dream mean anything in real life to the helpless group of Final Fantasy characters now mercilessly stuck in the woods? Will I ever stop typing random questions to get the readers agitated for the new chapter?

* * *

End of Chapter 2

My Message To You: No, the whole plot line to this isn't them stuck in the woods the whole time. Hehe, trust me...(I've been saying that a lot haven't I?)


	3. Chapter 3: The Truth Is Revealed

Chapter 3

This time as everyone woke up and had more stale snack bars for food, Yuna joined amongst them, normal.

"Did you have any more bad dreams?" Tifa asked.

"Nope, I still wanna leave the forest of course...but no bad dreams this time," Yuna had replied.

"That's good. Then we can finally get the heck out of here without worries, or anything bad...right?" Tidus asked.

"Yeah, let's get a move on already!" Cloud complained. Vincent swiftly took the map out, and the trail they planned on it.

"You know, the horse guide could have at least told someone we got lost," Tifa started as they finally got everything cleaned up and packed so they could walk.

Vincent was stalking behind the group with Sephiroth. Cloud, Squall, and Tidus were following the map at the front, and all the girls were complaining in the middle.

"I know, what kind of a horse guide is he, didn't he have some responsibility towards us?" Yuna asked.

"Maybe because we lost his horses, and we didn't exactly start off as best friends?" Cloud explained. "The guy wouldn't come looking after us."

They continued walking, and it seemed really pointless, because ten minutes turned into twenty minutes, which quickly turned into almost an hour. They still looked like they were in the same spot, with trees all around and a forest ground.

"Um...you sure we're going in the right direction?" Rinoa asked Cloud and Squall up in front, trying to get a peek at the map over their shoulders. Cloud hastily snapped it shut and turned to her.

"Of course we're going the right way! We're professionals aren't we?" Cloud snapped.

"Hmph...professionals my-," Rinoa started but Tifa pulled her back.

"Aeris, you've been awfully quiet, how is your therapy thing going?" Tifa asked trying to keep everything casual.

"Tifa, do you honestly think I've continued doing that project after this dilemma? Besides, am I the only one worrying over where Zell is, and why Wakka is walking on all fours?" Aeris blurted. Everyone turned and noticed Wakka walking like a dog.

He stopped and stood back up right. "I uh...was bored...," He said and walked a few feet away.

"Yes, where_ is _Zell?" Rinoa wondered.

"Zell?" Yuna asked in an airy, soft voice. Exclamation marks popped out of everyone's head.

"Oh no!" Rinoa wailed.

"Alright everyone calm down!" Cloud ordered.

"Nobody is getting agitated Cloud," Tifa grumbled.

"Right...well...no one get desperate and stuff," He re-phrased. Tifa rolled her eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at me!" Cloud snapped.

"I can if I want!" Tifa snapped back.

"Nuh-uh!" Cloud retorted.

"Uh-huh!" Tifa fired back.

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"_Nuh-uh_!"

"_Uh-huh_!"

"_Nuh-uh_!"

"Uh-," Tifa started but Rinoa covered her mouth.

"Shut-up! Stop fighting, we gotta care for Yuna!" Rinoa cried.

"Care for me? Why?" Yuna asked.

"Sorry, I'm Cloud Str-," Cloud was about to introduce himself when Yuna giggled.

"Yes, I know. Strife; _Cloud_, Strife...right?" Yuna asked and laughed. Cloud took his hand back with an anime sweat drop.

"Yeah but-," Cloud started but Tifa cut him off.

"Do you remember who we are Yuna?" Tifa asked.

"Of course. I did only meet you yesterday," She replied.

"I get it! She remembers only from yesterday but is still in her Final Fantasy X mode-," Wakka was saying when everyone glared at him and he stopped talking. Yuna merely smiled at all of them then moved on up to Tidus and Squall who were arguing over the map.

"No Squall, gosh Vincent made this line to–_don't shake your head at me_!" Tidus was exploding. Squall frowned and actually looked like he would say something when Yuna came between them.

"Hello. Is there something wrong on the way we are traveling?" She asked.

"No, no Babes, just leave us guys alone and we'll figure it out," Tidus said absentmindedly and waved her off without looking. Squall looked at Yuna's expression, which was taken aback and turning red as she blushed. Squall took Tidus's arm and moved him away from Yuna.

"What do you want Leonhart--let go of me!" Tidus protested. Squall shook his shoulders and pointed at Yuna angrily. "What? It's Yuna, I know that," Tidus replied frustrated. Squall slapped his forehead and shook his head. "It's...not Yuna?" Tidus suddenly asked in a very scared voice. Squall shook his head, then nodded. "Squall man, you're not making sense," Tidus said and turned away. He walked back to Yuna who was watching Rinoa, whom was trying to get Tifa and Cloud to stop fighting over whether hair was important or not.

"Gah! There's no agreeing with this woman!" Cloud cried.

"'This woman'? Are you out of your mind?" Tifa erupted.

"Actually, yes, _I am_!" Cloud replied angrily.

Rinoa gave up and walked back to Yuna.

"They fight like an old married couple," Yuna noted to Rinoa.

"Eh...close enough," Rinoa replied crossing her arms. "We need to get out of these woods fast...it's just ruining everyone," Rinoa said sadly. "I_ hate_ fighting."

"I'm working on it!" Cloud barked as he moved away from a shaking with rage Tifa and joined Squall with the map. Tidus went up to Rinoa and Yuna and put his arm around Yuna.

"I was working on the map, but I don't know why Vincent won't _move his behind from the back _and help us out," Tidus complained rolling his eyes.

Yuna shouldered his arm off. "Uh...please, don't do that," She said and moved next to Rinoa.

"Huh? Blame Vincent for everything? I always do that," Tidus replied.

"No, uh...never mind," Yuna said quietly and walked next to Wakka.

Tidus looked at Rinoa. "What's with her?" He asked.

Rinoa turned around to make sure Yuna was out of ear shot. "She's back Tidus, you know, to thinking it's Final Fantasy X. Maybe the dreams have stopped, but we're still lost in the woods, and she's in that desperate state of mind or whatever! She's still going insane...," Rinoa explained.

Tidus pounded his fist into his hand. "Damn! No wonder she was acting all shy and shit," Tidus replied.

Rinoa shook her head in puzzlement. "Can't you tell by her voice? It's all quiet and soft and stuff," Rinoa said.

Tidus shrugged. "I never found out why she suddenly got a different voice...I guess I'm also used to the old one...," Tidus replied.

Vincent suddenly came up to them. "I heard you complaining about my post. Do you wish for me to help with the map? But I do say that it is most advisable if I remain in the back to help ward off-," Vincent was explaining when Cloud turned around and cut him off.

"Lie! He wants to stay back with his boyfriend Sephiroth."

Tidus laughed and gave Cloud a thumbs up. Vincent scowled.

"Very well, I'll help out with the map," Vincent replied quietly and swooped away.

"That's alright, I don't need anyone to help me out back," Sephiroth hissed and waved his Masamune around. Aeris moved up front hurriedly and joined in Rinoa's and Tifa's conversation.

"Why is Tidus acting so strange?" Yuna was asking Wakka.

He shrugged. "Don't ask me, he's _your_ boy-," He started but then stopped and shrugged again mumbling nothing in particular.

"My what?" Yuna asked.

"Uh...boy...guardian...yeah that's it," Wakka replied nervously shifting his eyes.

"So are you, and you two are good friends, wouldn't you know if he was sick or something?" Yuna asked.

"Tidus isn't sick Yuna, he's just weird," Wakka replied.

"Weird?" Yuna repeated. Then Tidus came towards them and Yuna muttered an excuse and hastily moved away.

"What's with her? I know she's all in FF-X mode and all, but we were friends then too, right?" Tidus asked Wakka frantically.

"Why is everyone asking me stuff? _I don't know_!" Wakka exploded. Tidus inched a little from Wakka who was steaming for some odd reason. Literally.

* * *

The sun was setting. Those who were living normal lives and not stuck in the woods would watch it with an enjoying praise, rather then the looks of horror these fellow people lost in the woods were giving it now.

"We've been walking the whole _day_, we would have come across something by now," Tifa complained. Cloud threw the map on the ground in frustration.

"Don't do that!" Vincent cried and picked it up. Everyone groaned and slapped their foreheads in frustration because everyone was sure they were right on track.

"Princess will you shut the freakin' camera off? We're already stressed enough!" Cloud snapped at me.

"Yeah!" Everyone agreed.

No way! This is my camera and I'm making a documentary.

"Please, just shut the camera off," Vincent muttered.

"Yeah, how about we take five eh?" Cloud said and blocked the camera lense with his hand.

Hey! Don't touch the lense man!

"Then turn it off!" Cloud demanded and everyone suddenly turned against me, giving me dirty looks.

Right, go ahead, turn against the one who owns you! (Well, for now anyway. Square Enix let me borrow you, hehe.) You'll see then whose getting out of the woods!

"Aren't the batteries low by this time?" Tidus asked.

_No_! This is my magical camera.

But I knew I couldn't film them anymore, I mean their faces, their expressions, these characters were truly miserable. I had no choice. I'll have to _hide _first, then I'll film them.

(-Pretends to turn off camera-)

There, I turned if off, the documentary is on a pause.

"Why is the red light still flashing?" Sephiroth snarled.

That means it's off dummy!

Sephiroth's fist shook but he looked away from me.

Don't worry readers, I am now hiding behind a bush and shall, on all accounts, continue filming. I'm not missing a second of this!

"Alright, well now that we know we're not being recorded by some documentary obsessed pursuer of Final Fantasy characters-"

_What_?

"-We can go over this map again I guess," Cloud suggested. Everyone started to agree when Yuna shook her head.

"You got a better idea?" Sephiroth sneered.

"No...I've been here before...," Yuna replied softly, her eyes looking far away.

"What do you mean?" Vincent asked.

"I...I know where to go...follow me!" Yuna cried and suddenly took off at a run.

"Yuna, wait!" Tidus called and everyone attempted to catch up with her.

Yuna slowed down and darted her head in different directions. "I know where we are going will solve everything," She said turning to everyone and nodding. "Soon it will all be over."

Everyone looked at her anxiously.

"Are you sure?" Tidus asked.

"Yeah, I've gone through here before!" Yuna insisted. They started following Yuna through the woods.

"I don't know if Yuna really knows where she's going," Tifa said to Rinoa.

"I know but...she seems to insist on it...maybe we should," Rinoa replied.

"You guys are both stupid, we're not supposed to be following a mental person in the first place," Sephiroth growled.

But Yuna looked very confident as she would take random turns at some places and lead them through the otherwise undistinguishable forest. Suddenly Yuna came to an abrupt halt, causing Tidus and Cloud to almost run into her.

"We rest here. We'll continue tomorrow," She instructed as the sun was gone, and the sky darkened to a deep purple. So everyone re-did their camp for a temporary state, and once Vincent had a small fire up and ready he walked over to Yuna who was brandishing the map aside as if it was not worth anything, and it didn't follow the same way she thought would lead them back.

"Lady Yuna...can I have a word?" Vincent asked.

"Yes, sure," Yuna replied turning to him.

"Well...I'm sure I'm not the only one...but we, or at least me, are worried if you are leading us the right way...to, well, wherever you're leading us," Vincent explained.

"I can't deny it Vincent, I know where I'm going, I know it's right. I can't explain it, but it will all be over soon," Yuna replied and smiled at him confidently.

"Yes but-," Vincent started but Yuna shook her head.

"If we are lucky we'll be there by tomorrow. I sure do hope so," She said and spun around to check if the tent was ready to be entered safely yet. Vincent took this as a closing to the conversation and walked away.

"I asked about where we were going," He said to Sephiroth's expression.

The next day it was the same, Yuna was still in her Final Fantasy X mood or mode or whatever and determined to go the way she kept guaranteeing, "Would ensure to make it all over soon."

They were still walking in a group, Yuna semi leading the way, though until further notice from her Cloud and Tidus have taken to keep going the direction they were going for now so they could stay in the front and Yuna didn't protest.

Yuna hummed along as if they were merely on a hike. Nobody was talking much, there wasn't much to talk about. A lot of them have caught on that Zell still hasn't been seen, but decided they didn't want to be the ones to declare it out loud.

"Strange how there aren't any fiends around here in these isolated woods," Yuna noted once. The others agreed meekly but didn't say anything else. Yuna took this absence of having to battle lightly and as they walked on she started skipping and singing.

"Oh God," Wakka merely muttered, who felt as if he was transported back in time. Tidus felt the same and just looked at all the others nervously.

"Wonder when we'll get there eh?" He asked Cloud who just nodded annoyed, obviously because nobody was depending on him for their safety. They just walked on, sometimes listening to Yuna sing, when she switched off from humming, "Wouldn't it be Nice" By the _Beach Boys_. (Hehe)

"_Wouldn't it be nice if we were older,  
Then we wouldn't have to wait so long!  
And wouldn't it be nice to live together,  
In the kind of world where we belong_!" Yuna would sing aloud.

For some reason everyone looked at Tidus who stared back.

"What? It was her favorite song when she was 16...," He explained and everyone looked miserably ahead, to a forest scene that didn't seem to change. But though it was still day time, at one point the woods got darker, the trees more huddled together, the usual brown beige leaves turned grey and more dead looking.

"Hey Sephiroth, feel at home?" Cloud joked and snickered as everyone noticed this change. Everyone continued walking when Vincent noticed that Yuna wasn't among them.

"Yuna?" He called and turned around as everyone else did so too, also noticing Yuna was gone. But she wasn't really gone, she had just merely stopped walking and had that far away look to her eyes. She was dead still and wouldn't move, and she didn't seem to see or hear the others as she stared straight ahead.

"Yuns, what happened? This is the way you were leading us right?" Tidus asked coming over to her.

"No, no, no...," She murmured.

"No?" Tifa questioned. They huddled around her to see what was wrong.

"I-I...I can't go on. You guys go ahead," She said and made to turn around but Tidus held her arm back lightly.

"Yuna, you were leading us this way the whole time. What happened?" He asked.

Yuna shook her head. "You guys go ahead, I'll be fine," She said a little more frantically.

"She probably was leading us the wrong way and now wants to go back, but doesn't want to admit it or something. I knew it!" Sephiroth snarled.

"No. This is the right way. I've been here before, I know," Yuna insisted, drawing her watery eyes now on Sephiroth while she said it and then turned back to Tidus. "I can't stay, or go on. Please understand," She said.

"_Why_?" Cloud insisted like the others.

"Tidus, you know why," Yuna said with a hint of desperation.

"No, I don't," Tidus replied looking at the others as well to answer their expressions too.

"Yes, I told you why, you know!" Yuna cried and her tone was bold and for a minute everyone thought she came back. "Wait...you _don't_ know...you were gone...," Yuna said and was back to FF-X mode as fast as she got out of it, for she had her soft voice back. She was talking mostly to herself and was confusing everyone around her.

"Right, I don't know, so why can't you tell me?" Tidus asked.

"Because you're gone," She replied.

"No...I'm right here," Tidus replied puzzled and everyone was even more confused.

"Yuna, are you maybe...relating back to your dream?" Rinoa asked.

"What dream?" Yuna asked, but Rinoa didn't go further in questioning.

"Please, guys, I can't go on. But the again...I shouldn't be alone in the woods...," Yuna said, again talking more to herself.

"Yuna, why don't you just keep leading us where you were leading us and we'll see what happens," Vincent suggested.

"I won't be alone...right?" She asked feebly, and she trembled slightly and went paler then she already was.

"No, Yuna, we're all right here," Rinoa replied comfortingly and linked Yuna's arm with hers.

"Yeah, me too," Tidus said brightly and gave her hand a squeeze.

"Alright...we go straight through here...," Yuna instructed. Vincent and Squall treaded first and looked around, for Yuna indicated to go through some medium height straggly bushes.

"Clear," Vincent declared and everyone else followed them. Yuna gave off a whimper as she passed through the bushes.

"Yuna, it's alright!" Tifa reassured her on Yuna's opposite side from Rinoa. Aeris also helped in comforting with Tifa and Rinoa, and they all walked together with Yuna as Sephiroth stalked behind them and the other guys walked in front.(Macho men!)

They walked, the woods the same sinister way, until they all noticed something that made them walk slower.

"What...the-?" Tidus asked. A slow fog had seeped in, and when they looked ahead, there was even more deep and dense fog awaiting them.

"Why has fog come in this particular part of the woods?" Vincent asked.

"Well, at least our trip got a little more exciting...," Cloud replied, trying I guess to look on the bright side.

"Oh no," Yuna muttered and started to whimper.

"Yuns, it's just fog...we'll get through it," Tidus said to her.

"No, no, that!" Yuna shrieked and pointed up at the tree branches. Oh, shit...it's the figures from the trees! Those things scare the hell out of me...

* * *

Everyone looked at the lone figures hanging from the trees, and the marks on the tree trunks. The fog seeped in slowly, but you could almost hear it, and you could definitely feel it's cold.

"Wha-What are those things?" Rinoa gasped and dug her nails into Squall's arm.

"They weren't set up there naturally," Vincent noted quietly.

"Don't look at them," Yuna warned suddenly and wouldn't look up and focused her eyes on the ground.

"Geez, how are we going to know where to go?" Cloud asked jerking his head down all of a sudden.

"I-I guess I know the way...Follow me," Yuna said and took Tidus's hand to lead him to the right direction. The other's followed, trying hard not to look and inspect the figures more closely. Then Yuna started crying and threatened to turn back around.

"No Yuna, we're almost there...I see something ahead!" Cloud said excitedly, because he thought he did see something looming ahead.

"I-I can't look," Yuna sobbed lightly and tried to wipe her face with her hands but Tidus had taken them in his and he hugged her. "Tidus we have to leave," Yuna told him when she pushed herself lightly away.

"No...you said it'd be over once we got there...just lead us there. We're all waiting," Tidus replied.

"But...I don't want to go...," Yuna said.

"Do you know what's at the end?" Vincent asked her softly seeing as how she was crying.

"That's it, it's just the end," Yuna replied.

"How is that it?" Tifa asked.

"It just is!" Yuna cried.

"Well, we do need to put an 'end' to these stupid woods," Cloud said and started walking forward.

"No Cloud don't go!" Yuna cried suddenly.

"Yuna, we're going and that's final. This is just a forest, there's nothing scary in it. What are we, in some crappy teenage horror movie?" Tidus asked.

Maybe...

"Is that what you want, to go?" Yuna asked him seriously.

"Uh...I guess...," Tidus replied.

"We all wanna go. There may be something that can help us get out of here at The End!" Rinoa agreed.

"If Tidus wants to go, I guess I'll go too," Yuna replied meekly looking down.

"Alright then, let's catch up to Cloud before the Blair Witch eats him or something," Wakka said and everyone gave him a terrorized look.

"I was _joking_?" He replied to their expressions but everyone continued to look scared as they watched Cloud stroll along ahead of them, obviously trying to be brave by whistling like there was nothing wrong.

"Hey guys, there seems to be like, a hedge wall or something!" Cloud cried and they saw that he stopped because there was something blocking him. Indeed, brushy hedges grew so tall, it was like a wall that continued on both sides as far as anyone could see. Whatever it was hiding behind it, it was completely blocked by the wall, and it seemed so sturdy and the dead hard leaves so grown in together nobody could get through.

"This is it," Yuna suddenly said in an oddly triumphant but still frightened voice. "It's through this wall. If turn back now-," Yuna started but Tidus cut her off.

"We're _not _turning back, we're going to end this once and for all," He said. Yuna nodded and a few streams of tears escaped her eyes again.

"I wonder what's across this wall that Yuna is so afraid of," Vincent asked Sephiroth quietly, and a bit farther back then everyone else.

"Probably a second hand run salon," Sephiroth suggested.

"No, I'm thinking it has something to do with what she got traumatized by...in her dream, you know?" Vincent asked ignoring Sephiroth's suggestion.

"Whatever, I just wanna get out of here," Sephiroth growled. Squall mentioned for everyone to stand back, and lunged at the wall with his blade. He bounced back and landed on his back.

Cloud let out a triumphant, cocky little "Ha-ha-ha!" and smirked. "Foolish little Squall, watch and learn!" He cried. He raised his own blade out of nowhere from behind his back the same time he raised one eyebrow, for a cool like reaction. Squall scowled at him.

"Guys and their swords," Tifa muttered.

"Madam, out of the way," Cloud ordered at Tifa who snorted and moved away from the wall with her arms crossed. With a yell Cloud lunged at it flying and struck it hard. Squall grinned as Cloud flew back even farther than he had, with his blade even hitting his head with a painful _thunk _. "Owwwiiiee!" Cloud cried and massaged his head. Tifa cackled evilly.

"You sissies are pathetic," Sephiroth muttered.

"Oh yeah! You try then!" Cloud cried at Sephiroth angrily.

"I know better. Obviously the hedge won't cut using a blade," Sephiroth replied.

"Fine, we'll use magic or something. What's the element weakness of a hedge?" Cloud asked.

"A weed whacker," Tidus snorted and even Sephiroth laughed. Cloud anime sweat dropped and grumbled. Wakka got bored and leaned on the hedge absent mindedly, and with a jolt he jumped away as the section he had leaned on fell back. Everyone turned and just stared in disbelief.

"I can't believe it!" Cloud cried and cursed.

"It's getting dark already, we should hurry up and go through it," Vincent said and was the first to go. Everyone followed, after Yuna received some encouragement from Rinoa and Tidus, and it wasn't long until they saw a looming building through the gnarled dark trees and heavy fog.

"It-It's the house," Yuna stammered.

"Like, oh my God! You think someone lives there?" Rinoa cried excitedly.

"Well it is a _house _isn't it?" Sephiroth sneered.

"I don't know, by the looks of it, it has been isolated for quite some time," Vincent reported.

"Just because it has some gnarled trees and some gravestones, with a touch of fog, doesn't mean no one lives here. Vincent, you should be feeling at your own home," Cloud replied and laughed along with Tidus.

"Guys, let's just see if anyone could help us and get out of this cold backyard," Tifa said to stop the fighting and proceeded towards the broken down building, rubbing her arms for warmth.

"I doubt anyone lives in this dump," Tidus said following Rinoa while leading a trembling Yuna.

"C-Cold," Yuna stammered through chattering teeth. Tidus held her close. Meanwhile, Cloud inspected a stone wall by tapping it with his blade. The wall crumbled down into smoke and rubble.

"Nice going! No surprise if you get sued by the owner," Tifa said.

"It's ok, I think Vincent's great uncle is on his graveyard shift--literally," Cloud replied and laughed at his own joke. Vincent rolled his eyes and was first to spot a burly hard wood door, covered in damp moss and barely visible through the fog. Everyone stepped over to it. Vincent pushed at it but it didn't budge.

"Use the fucking door knob genius," Cloud snapped and grabbed at the door knob, turning it to open the door and revealing pitch black darkness. Sephiroth threw a rock inside and struck a wall, the dust from the impact suffocating everyone and leading them into coughing fits. Sephiroth then stepped inside and seemed to look around.

"I always knew vampires had night vision," Cloud commented. Sephiroth then suddenly pointed a hand towards a random spot, and a torch ignited into flame, giving off a dull glow to the house. Everyone was too afraid to ask how in the name of hell Sephiroth knew how to do that.

"Nobody lives here, but we can stay here over night and explore beyond the house," Vincent said. Everyone walked inside and looked around. They shuddered at what they found on the walls.

"Are...those...bloody _hand prints _?" Cloud managed to ask. Everyone was afraid to answer as they gazed over a bunch of bloody hand prints, scattered all over the walls of the house. Then suddenly they heard a noise that made the hair on the back of their necks rise, their hearts skip a beat and fly up to their throat, a sound that literally made them all stop breathing.

"_He-e-e-l-p_!" Came a moan-ish yell, from upstairs.

"Oh my fucking God, it's Zell!" Tifa cried, her hands flying to her head.

"Please, _help_!" Came Zell again.

"It's coming from upstairs!" Cloud cried and immediately sprinted up the stone steps, dust clouds following his feet.

"Cloud! Don't go up there!" Yuna cried and started to cry all of a sudden.

"Back up!" Cloud cried halfway through, ignoring Yuna. Squall and Vincent followed him up. Yuna started to sob and shake uncontrollably.

"Rinoa, take care of Yuna, I have to go see what's up!" Tidus cried to Rinoa who nodded hurriedly coming to Yuna's side.

"No!" Yuna shrieked but Tidus gave her a final hug and followed Cloud's party.

"That leaves me and Wakka to go out back and see what's going on there," Sephiroth said. Wakka looked like he rather watch ice melt, metal rust, or grass grow. Sephiroth noticed this. "Fine, stay here with the _women_," Sephiroth sneered and started out the door. Tifa glared at him, then Wakka who immediately jumped up and followed him.

Tifa sighed and slumped against the wall, sliding all the way down and facing Rinoa, Yuna, and Aeris who were all kneeling on the floor looking back at her. "I hate this," She suddenly said.

"Me too," Rinoa agreed. "It's so scary here."

"No not that!" Tifa growled. "I hate not being part of the action. This stinks. I say we form our own party and explore downstairs!" She suggested excitedly.

"N-N-No! You guys stay here, I need to be with Tidus," Yuna said shakily and tried to get up.

"Yunie, no!" Rinoa cried and pushed her back down. "Tidus is fine! You need to stay with us, and calm down!"

"I can't! Can't you see? We're in danger, and I must be with him until the end," Yuna said and got up quickly before Rinoa could push her down again and headed upstairs.

"I'm going with you," Tifa said getting up also.

"I wanna go be with Squall too! You guys aren't the only ones with boyfriends you know," Rinoa wailed and followed Yuna.

"What? You think I'm going because of _Cloud?_" Tifa demanded. Rinoa shifted her eyes. "Well I'm _not_!" Tifa cried and turned to Aeris. "Aeris, you're coming too, right?" Tifa asked.

"I-I guess...I mean, I don't want to be left alone here either...nor do I want to be alone when Sephiroth comes back...," Aeris replied and stood up slowly, joining them. They all headed upstairs, to a pitch black landing.

"Tidus?" Yuna called nervously.

"Squally Squirrel!" Rinoa cried out cheerfully. Tifa and Aeris looked at her, then at each other, shrugging.

* * *

Meanwhile, Tidy Bear, Squally Squirrel, Cloud, and Vincent had followed Zell's voice, which had continued yelling and moaning out in agony.

"Is he being tortured or something?" Tidus asked as they stumbled around in the dark floor of upstairs. Vincent strolled along the hallway as if it was daytime, and the rest struggled to follow him without running into him or each other.

"His voice had sounded faded yet close at the same time. I also can't determine which direction it's coming from. This is truly challenging," Vincent reported stopping briefly and almost tripping over Cloud who had run into him when he stopped.

"Stupid Zell, getting lost," Cloud replied menacingly as if Vincent hadn't said anything important.

"He stopped calling. Now what do we do?" Tidus asked.

"I think it was coming from outside...maybe the roof?" Vincent suggested.

"It's definitely not upstairs anymore...maybe on the roof? Or outside?" Cloud asked and Tidus agreed. Vincent anime sweat dropped and reluctantly followed the three as they turned around and headed back the way they had come from.

* * *

"It's too dark, I can't see a thing. Let's head back downstairs and see if Sephiroth and Wakka have come back yet," Tifa suggested. Everyone started back down the stairs except for Yuna.

"I'll keep watch here," She said softly but nobody heard her. After the others stomped down the stairs, Yuna walked forward with her arms outstretched. She felt a door and at that precise moment, heard Zell again. She got scared and hurriedly opened the door, running inside and closing the door behind her, but putting her ear against it to see if she could hear anything else. She heard people passing by the door then go down the stairs. She remained in the room afraid to come outside. She slid down the door and sat there at the bottom crying.

* * *

Sephiroth and Wakka remained outside, patrolling the place. "Let's just go back inside," Wakka complained.

"No way!" Sephiroth snarled spinning around facing Wakka. "I can handle the outside...who knows if that Zell kid shows up here?" Sephiroth explained but stopped short afterward. "I hear something out back. This is a job for us! Let's go," Sephiroth cried and swooped out of view, without waiting for Wakka's protest.

* * *

Tifa, Aeris, and Rinoa gave up looking around downstairs. "There's nothing but rubble and dust. Let's go back to the entrance room and wait for the guys," Tifa said and they walked to the hall. Tidus, Squall, and Cloud had just gotten to the bottom of the stairs as they girls came in.

"Oh, you guys are ok!" Rinoa cried and ran to Squall.

"We didn't find anything in that damn darkness, and we heard Zell for awhile but then it got...silent," Cloud reported. Everyone shuddered.

"Hey...where's Yuna?" Tidus asked. They looked around.

"She got lost!" Rinoa wailed. Suddenly they heard a girly scream coming from outside.

"That's her!" Tidus cried and everyone ran outside.

* * *

Yuna would stop sobbing for a few seconds to see if she heard Tidus or any of the others. The whole house was silent, so she assumed that they had finally gone. "They're gone...they're gone...all of them...," Yuna murmured choking back tears but they spilled all the same. She got up with a shaky hand and tried to locate the door knob of the door. She found herself locked in. "No! No, no, no! _No_!" Yuna cried and pounded on the door.

Vincent, who had remained in the hallway, and fortunately the others hadn't noticed, was trying to find out things for himself. He heard the pounding by Yuna and rushed to the room he heard it from. He flung open the door and saw the faint outline of Yuna, which he guessed was Yuna since she was crying. "Yuna?" He asked quietly.

Yuna suddenly ran up to him and, to Vincent's utter surprise, horror, and confusion she hugged him tight and started crying on his shoulder. Vincent stood there paralyzed until Yuna loosened her grip on him a little and looked up.

"T-T-Tidus?" She asked.

_Ah, of course. She had thought I was Tidus_, Vincent thought with some relief. But before he could say anything, because he was still not very much in the state of speech for Yuna was still too close for comfort, Yuna suddenly started crying again. She lifted her hands from him to cover her own face.

"Y-You're not Tidus," She muttered.

"N-No, sorry...it's me Vincent, and I heard you pounding on the door...are, are you ok?" He managed to ask. She shook her head.

"They're all gone," She managed after awhile.

"I don't believe that, they are probably still in the house. I was going downstairs already...good thing I stayed up, we'd assume you got lost," Vincent replied sort of jokingly but Yuna just started to cry some more and Vincent was afraid she might hug him again. "C'mon, let's go downstairs to see if they are there," Vincent suggested but Yuna sort of shook her head and turned away.

"It's no use, they've all gone. Probably T-T-Tidus too, a-a-and I wasn't even there w-w-with him," Yuna sobbed. Vincent took in a breath and mustered all the courage he had in him. Then, slowly, he extended his hand until he held Yuna's arm at elbow's length, then slid his hand down so that he was holding hers and started to pull her to the door.

"You'll see Yuna, they're not gone," Vincent reassured her. Yuna sniffed and didn't protest that he was leading her down the stairs. Even though Vincent reassured her again and again everything was fine, Yuna seemed not to be listening and kept muttering "No, no, no." But Vincent's stomach suddenly sank when he saw that nobody _was _down stairs. If nobody was downstairs, and nobody was upstairs, there wasn't anybody in the house then except him and Yuna.

"They must be outside," Vincent said to Yuna without looking at her, but in his head he thought, _What would they be doing outside in the dark woods? _

Yuna let go of his hand and instead took to digging her nails into his arm as she clutched him in fright. "Outside? B-B-But it's c-cold and dark outside," She stammered. Vincent lead her outside anyway, where indeed it was freezing and the fog was still around, and it was very dark. He felt Yuna trembling beside him as she clutched his arm.

"Argh...alright...here," Vincent said and took his cloak off. He wrapped it over Yuna who clutched at it and muttered a thanks. "Now...let's check out back to see if they're-," Vincent started but suddenly they heard a howl. "Sounds human," Vincent noted in a scared voice after it died away. Yuna let out a loud sob at that and dug her face onto Vincent's arm so that she wouldn't see anything. Vincent just shook his head and tried to walk towards the noise while hauling Yuna with him.

They walked closer and closer, when Vincent tripped on something and Yuna almost fell with him. "Wha-what was that?" Yuna asked meekly. Vincent bent down, and pushed over what he had tripped on. It was a body.

"W-W-What the!" Vincent gasped, and he jumped up surprised. Yuna screamed. It was Squall! His hair was matted with blood and dirt and his face was equally bloody and dirty.

"How did this happen!" Yuna shrieked and started to cry, for fright that this was her fate as well.

"L-Let's move on," Vincent replied with a gulp, and for once he was actually a little afraid. Who else would they find dead?

"Vincent I can't go on...this is too scary," Yuna whispered. Vincent looked back at her. He knew Yuna was scared to death even before they even came to this strange stone house...but now he saw the true fright in her eyes. He could almost feel how frightened she was. For once...Vincent felt sorry. So he hated himself for doing this.

"Come here," He said. Yuna inched to him and he held out his arm. Yuna gave off a little sob and flung herself around him, glad for the sudden security. Vincent gave off a sigh and looked around, thankful that no one was watching this. "Yuna, don't cry so much, really. It's going to be fine," Vincent reassured her.

"No, no it's not! We're all going to end up dead!" Yuna cried as she sobbed on him.

"Look, I'm sure Squall isn't really dead I mean, an-and anyway that doesn't mean nobody else is alive, you know, like Tidus! Think of Tidus and hopefully we'll find him-"

"_Hopefully_?" Yuna shrieked cutting him off and started to cry again. Vincent winced and realized he might have said the wrong thing.

"What is this anyway? I thought you were brave and kick ass Yuna now, didn't you bring your guns with you?" Vincent asked. Yuna immediately stopped sobbing and merely sniffled as she backed away from him.

"What are you talking about? I've never held a gun before in my life! Are you suggesting I go around shooting things in the dark until I find Tidus!" She cried, now angry.

"Oh...right, sorry I forgot," Vincent said to himself to Yuna's confusion as he had forgotten Yuna was in "Final Fantasy X mode" (Hehe. Air quotations.)

"Look, whatever! Just take it from me, you can shoot," He added and rummaged around himself, pulling out a spare gun and handing it to her.

"What the--are you serious!" Yuna cried waving the gun around.

"Whoa, be careful with that!" Vincent scolded ignoring her.

"I don't _wanna_ do it!" Yuna wailed like a baby and she almost chucked it away, but Vincent had grabbed her arm and looked into her eyes.

"You have to help me find the others, and incase whatever out there that killed them is still around, _we have to kill it_," He explained quietly. Yuna whimpered and looked down at the gun in her hand and positioned it correctly in her grasp.

"Ok," She nodded and Vincent nodded in return. She followed him as he started walking slowly again, Yuna having a gut feeling he was searching for more bodies.

"Oh no," Yuna heard Vincent say and she practically threw up.

"Vincent...please, I'm not good with this tragedy stuff and-and bodies," She pleaded quietly.

"Yes, I know. Fine, watch out for that there...don't trip over it, and tell yourself it's a tree root," Vincent replied. Yuna let out a frightened groan and moved closer to Vincent, grabbing his hand.

"Yuna-," Vincent was about to complain but suddenly she screamed and pointed. Vincent looked up and his mouth dropped open.

* * *

Too bad Princess has to stop writing because she doesn't feel like spoiling her readers and will torture them by leaving them hanging...

Just kidding. I would never do that to you guys. Um...

* * *

First they saw Tifa, and Rinoa. Their throats were slashed and animal like scratches were all over their clothes and blank faces as they were sprawled on the ground. Aeris was a few yards away, in a crumpled sort of state, and a tree branch was on top of her. Cloud was heaved on a rock it seemed, and almost right behind him was a wide wall, with blood scratches all over it and more of those hand prints. The wall was crumpling and cracked, and next to an oak tree whose shadow was almost hiding him...was Tidus, standing up, leaning face first on the wall.

Yuna dropped her gun and Vincent watched it fall and hit the ground, crestfallen. He didn't look at any of the others, nor at Yuna. Yuna was trembling so hard Vincent felt the vibrations of her going through the ground and coming to him. For some reason, Yuna didn't cry. Vincent guessed she had cried so much during this whole entire episode that her tear glands simply refused to work, even though it reached the climax of Yuna's emotional state.

Vincent finally looked up at her and watched as she just closed her eyes and slowly sank to the ground, sitting there, her hands trembling something terrible and her breath coming out in gasps. It was so utterly dramatic and something out of a movie, that Vincent doubted for a whole minute that this whole thing was real. Has this really happened? Is everyone..._gone_? He sat next to Yuna but didn't say anything.

"I knew it was going to happen," Yuna suddenly whispered. Vincent looked at her.

"No you didn't. Nobody could have ever predicted this," Vincent replied, but he still knew there was something fishy to all of it.

"I _knew _it," Yuna repeated and covered her face with her hands. Suddenly Vincent heard a brushing sound behind them.

"Don't move," Vincent told her and got up, his gun ready.

"No, I want to help," Yuna replied and got up. She picked up her gun and stood next to him.

"Are you sure?" Vincent asked her bewildered.

"Just go," Yuna replied and proceeded to move ahead of him. They moved into the dark forest, practically blind. Yuna felt Vincent put a hand on her shoulder as he moved in front of her. After awhile, Yuna gave out a gasp as even she heard the brushing sound this time, and Vincent aimed his gun. Yuna aimed hers with her hand shaking, and hoped she didn't have to actually shoot anything.

Moments later, they were about to turn back when suddenly a figure appeared and Yuna pulled the trigger, closing her eyes.

"Ah! Damn it," Came a voice.

"_Sephiroth_?" Vincent cried.

"Valentine, what are you doing walking around alone in the woods with Barbie and teaching her how to shoot? And why exactly did you, so called best guns man, forget to teach her the _biggest rule?_" Sephiroth cried glaring at Yuna.

"Ugh, sorry Sephiroth-," Yuna started.

"Don't freakin' shoot with your eyes closed!" Sephiroth cut her off angrily.

"Sephiroth, enough! What are _you _doing alone in these dark woods?" Vincent demanded, standing between Sephiroth and Yuna.

"Looking for Zell! Wasn't that the plan?" Sephiroth snarled.

"Y-Yes but...," Vincent started but then looked at Sephiroth's eyes. "Wait! Sephiroth, how _could_ you? I knew it, I wondered why you weren't there-," Vincent ran a hand through his hair and looked away.

"Knew _what_? Just because I'm better at fighting than everyone else you automatically assume I was the one who did something bad-," Sephiroth replied.

"Did you, or did you not kill Tidus?" Yuna demanded suddenly and raised her gun at Sephiroth.

"Yuna!" Vincent cried alarmed but Sephiroth snorted.

"Don't worry, I didn't kill your blondie boyfriend Ken. Though I admit I'm angered by the fact that I've been beaten to it-," Sephiroth was replying then he noticed Yuna's expression and quickly added, "Ok, ok, I didn't kill him and why are you asking?"

"We...we left the house after everyone, because everyone had gone and well, we were going through the woods-," Vincent started explaining.

"Everyone's dead," Yuna finished for him, and with a single tear running down her cheek she lowered her gun slowly.

Suddenly Sephiroth's eyes widened. "I don't believe it," He murmured dreamily. "It's a dream come true."

Yuna looked at him with shock. "How _could you_! Don't you have a heart _at all_!" Yuna cried at him.

"No...not really...," Sephiroth replied examining his nails. Vincent held Yuna's shoulder back to keep her from pouncing on Sephiroth.

"Look Sephiroth, I don't believe some monster in the woods killed everyone. Did you seriously have nothing to do with this?" Vincent asked him sternly.

"Maybe...maybe not...," Sephiroth replied and pushed past them. Yuna's tears were quickly racing each other down her face and Vincent knew that her tear glands haven't given up after all.

"Come on Yuna, we can find out what he's up to," Vincent whispered to her and gave her a small smile. Yuna looked down and wiped her eyes.

"Ok," She replied feebly, returning him a weak smile. They followed slowly after Sephiroth, not really knowing what they were doing. Suddenly, a strong wind came out of nowhere, and whipped around them. Yuna screamed and Vincent pulled her to him and looked around to see where Sephiroth had gone. Just as fast as it had come, the wind died away and Sephiroth was gone. Yuna didn't move from Vincent's protective grasp, which was hard for Vincent because he wanted to see where Sephiroth had gone.

"Yuna, Sephiroth, he-," Vincent said and was about to push Yuna away but she wouldn't let go.

"Please, don't leave me alone," Yuna replied. Vincent sighed.

"But Yuna, Sephiroth just disappeared, don't you wanna know what happened or-? Well?" Vincent practically pleaded so he could be let go.

"Fine, but...stay close," Yuna said and let go of him but still grabbed his arm. Vincent practically sprinted to the spot Sephiroth was and looked around.

"He couldn't have just disa-," Vincent was about to say when he did a double take on something that he had thought was a log.

"What? What did you find?" Yuna asked him trying to make out what Vincent was staring at.

"He...he...," Vincent trailed off and inched closer towards Sephiroth's body on the ground.

"Wait...that-that's _Sephiroth_?" Yuna cried and found out that because she didn't recognize him was because he was face down and his hair had sort of wrapped around him, hiding him completely. Vincent didn't reply. It was Yuna's turn to put her hand gently on his shoulder.

"I can't believe this," Vincent merely murmured and placed his hand on his forehead. Yuna leaned her head on his shoulder and rubbed her eyes.

"Vincent, we have to get out of here," She said quietly.

"Yeah? And go where? We're stranded in the middle of nowhere with some un-explainable force killing people and we're going to be next!" Vincent growled.

"Don't say that," Yuna murmured.

"I just don't get this! This is ending up like some teen horror movie, and we have nowhere to turn, but just wait until that wind thing comes around and kills us next!" Vincent continued.

"Not a teen horror movie, but close," Said a voice.

"Huh?" Vincent and Yuna replied in unison and turned around to face darkness.

"Whose there?" Vincent demanded as Yuna hid herself behind him.

"If I told you, it would give it away, would it?" The voice replied chuckling and whoever it was came forward. Vincent swiftly took out his gun but turned to Yuna shockingly as she quickly pulled his arm down.

"Wait...is that who I _think_ it is?" Yuna asked as Vincent lowered his gun. By the sound of Yuna's bold tone, she was back to her normal self all of a sudden.

"Yuna, doll, glad you recognized!" Ashton Kutcher replied as he came close enough for them to make him out.

"_Like oh-my-God I can't believe this_!" Yuna shrieked out happily and punched Ashton on the shoulder as he laughed, and a bunch of camera people came out and laughed too.

"What...what is going on?" Vincent asked nervously, totally confused. Suddenly the whole gang, and _Zell_ came out of nowhere, laughing and wiping their bleeding faces like it was no big deal.

"YOU JUST GOT _PUNK'D_!" Ashton cried.

"...Punk'd?" Vincent repeated.

"Yeah, it's like when Ashton punks celebrities and stuff, right Ashton?" Rinoa asked.

"Yeah, except this was the Final Fantasy horror episode special! Man it was great...," Ashton replied. Vincent twitched.

"Tidus! You're ok!" Yuna cried happily and Vincent watched her run into his arms.

"I...I seriously don't get it...you people do this to other people... to _entertain_?" Vincent asked.

Ashton shrugged. "Why not?" He replied.

Sephiroth came up behind Vincent and slapped his back really hard. "Haha! I can't believe you fell for that Valentine, and that whole scene of me 'dying'? You fell for it! I gotta admit I'd wake up from the dead right then and there if you started crying on me...," Sephiroth said.

Vincent shook slightly with anger. "What about Zell?" Vincent asked glaring at Zell's mocking face, "Where did you go all this time! _We were freakin' looking for you_!" Vincent exploded.

"Well, I suddenly picked up this scent of hot dogs, so I left while everyone else was walking, and followed it for two days. I ended up in this little town just off the forest, and walked into Ashton. We planned a prank to play on all of you while I met him, and we totally put it into action. And you guys fell for it so bad!" Zell cried and laughed.

"So we were really stuck in the woods until the day you left?" Yuna asked.

"Yeah, sort of. These woods are part of a national park, and that stone house used to be a park ranger office. They abandoned it and built a bigger and new one way off that way, yeah, we'd never reach it," Zell explained.

"These woods are a _national park _?" Vincent repeated in disbelief.

"Yeah...except we wound up in the old part, where it sometimes gets foggy and a little funky," Zell replied waving his hand in front of his face.

"But the house, it-it was covered in bloody hand prints, and the wall too-," Vincent sputtered.

"Actually, the hand prints were a school project the whole 1st grade of our town school set up, and all the kids got to put their hand prints on the park's wall and station. Of course that was years ago, so now the wall has long since crumbled and yeah, the prints are still there, but that's paint my friend not blood," A park ranger said coming out of nowhere.

"What about those figures hanging from the trees that Yuna saw in her dream and were actually true?" Vincent demanded.

"What dream?" Yuna asked but Vincent ignored her and stared at the park ranger.

"Oh, well I know it may be hard to believe but the squirrels we have here are of a rare breed, and uh...they aren't very right in the head," The park ranger replied making a loopy sign at the side of his own head.

"Tell me about it," Zell grumbled who, if you remember, was a victim of the squirrel's insanity.

"Vincent, just lighten up man! We're going back home, yeah!" Cloud cried punching the air.

"Ok guys, everyone to my jeep!" The park ranger called out and everyone cheered. Vincent waited until everyone was ahead, and miserably followed the group.

"Tidus, wipe that paint off your face, it's scaring me," Yuna said to Tidus who tried to wipe it off reluctantly.

"But it looks so cool," He protested.

"Heh, look at mine, looks like I got a deep gash from a blade on the side of my face," Cloud showed off popping up in front of Tidus. Squall shoved him. "Hey man I didn't mean anything by it!" Cloud cried and started a shoving game with Squall.

"Ok, you kiddies stop that and let's get the hell out of here," Sephiroth growled and was the first to hop on the jeep. Everyone else followed, and soon they were on their way back to the hotel!

That is...unless the car stops working.

"Oh no, the car died!" The park ranger cried. Everyone gaped at him and groaned in disbelief. "Haha, just kidding! I have the humor in my family," The park ranger replied.

"I bet," Sephiroth snarled and everyone else gave off a sigh of relief.

Will the car_ really_ stop working while they are driving there? Does Ashton Kutcher really have magical powers, seeing as how he disappeared suddenly? Or he will re-appear at the wedding? Is the wedding still on? Is Yuna's sanity officially back? Will she remember any of the dramatic moments she had with Vincent? (Hehe)

* * *

Music Credit: "Wouldn't it be Nice" - Beach Boys

Plot Steal (Only mildly...hehe): _The Blair Witch Project _

Celebrity Guest Star: Ashton Kutcher

My Message to You: Next chapter's actually funny and like...on track to the actual plot line! Like, really? Yeah! Tune in next time...

Things you won't wanna miss:

Auron's Bachelor Party

Quistis and Auron's Wedding

And more...


	4. Chapter 4: Bachelorettes and Bachelors

Chapter 4: Bachelorettes and Bachelors

After the dramatic events that would normally haunt people for a long time, maybe even for life, everyone in the gang more or less forgot about it. Except for one person. Hehe.

"C'mon Vince, we're going to breakfast, ya coming?" Cloud asked Vincent in their room about two days since the uh...hmm..._thing_.

"No," Vincent replied muffled from being under his blankets.

"You haven't left this damn room in two fucking days, Vincent! Get up!" Cloud cried and pulled the blankets away. Vincent hissed and covered his head with his arms.

"The sun...turn it off...," Vincent muttered as the shades were drawn in their room.

"Oh," Cloud said hastily and pulled on the string hard. The whole shade fell down. Cloud scratched his head and laughed nervously. "C'mon! At least it woke you up. Auron is due to come back from...well, wherever he's been this whole time, and we need to meet up with him to know when the wedding is, 'cause seriously it's taking some time...," Cloud said. (I know seriously, when am I _ever_ going to get to the wedding?)

"Fine, fine...," Vincent replied and got up. He and Cloud walked out into the hallway and went into the dining place where breakfast was served from nine to eleven in the morning.

"What do you mean _no more breakfast_?" Cloud erupted to the serving lady. She pointed her spatula without looking behind her, and Cloud read the clock. It read 11:01 A.M.

"Oh c'mon! I want my _bacon _man!" Cloud whined. Vincent anime sweat dropped and shook his head.

"Heh, oh _Cloud_!" A voice called in a sing song way. Cloud turned around and saw Tifa wave a piece of bacon around then eat it, smirking at him.

"Argh! _Damn _you...you _and_ your bacon!" Cloud cried and walked away angrily. Vincent sulked off to a lonely table in the corner and proceeded to concentrate on the very interesting design of how thread criss-crosses together to make a table cloth. Cloud came back to him minutes later, 'Tifa' in pen readable across his hand clearly and then smaller words, of possible revenge plans, under it.

"Anyway, I know you don't like sunlight and all, but that means you usually wake up earlier then everyone else. What's been up with you buddy?" Cloud asked him. Vincent kept looking down. "Fine...be all _silent_ again...nobody talks around here, it bugs me," Cloud retorted.

Suddenly the doors flew open, revealing a bright spotlight from the sun on the carpet. Cloud looked up and music came out of nowhere. A fog seeped in, and through the light a skinny figure strutted down walking in slow motion, removing her sunglasses and flipping her hair. Cloud squinted in the light but it was too late. Soon...the moment was over, and the music stopped. The fog re-winded itself away and the doors closed.

"Something heavenly just entered the room," Cloud reported. Vincent didn't move. I don't even think he was breathing. But as Cloud craned his neck a disappointed sigh came out of him. "Darn...it's just Yuna," He said. Vincent's face lowered more if that were even possible. "I wonder why she's alone," Cloud continued. "I see she's wearing her famous short denim mini skirt with a-," Cloud started but Vincent muttered something. "Huh?" Cloud asked.

"I said, _shut up_," Vincent repeated.

"Why?" Cloud demanded.

"I don't want to hear you rant on with your sick minded games," Vincent replied.

"Sick minded? Silly inexperienced Vincent, it's merely an _observation strategy_, nothing 'sick minded'. Who do you think I am anyway? That's not _all_ I think about you know," Cloud explained. Vincent didn't reply but gave off a half hearted sigh. "Eh, you're no fun, I wish Tidus was here," Cloud said and leaned an elbow on the table.

As if on cue they heard some ruckus going on behind the kitchen, and Tidus appearing out of nowhere trying to avoid a spatula that had so happened to be hurtled at him. Possibly by the serving lady. Hehe. Tidus ran over to Cloud and Vincent, placing his hands on his knees while taking big breaths before finally sitting down.

"What happened?" Cloud asked.

"The stupid serving lady! Cloud, _they don't have any bacon_," Tidus replied in a scared voice.

"I know!" Cloud blurted out and rolled his eyes. Tidus clicked his tongue and shook his head. Vincent was wondering why he was sitting at a table with either of them in the first place, while Cloud added 'Serving Lady' (poorly scribbled) onto his hand next to Tifa's. Yuna sat on the chair next to Tidus, which was between Vincent as well, and placed a cup of orange juice in front of her.

"Hey guys," She greeted.

"Hey," Cloud and Tidus replied simultaneously.

"How come you guys aren't eating?" Yuna asked while drinking her juice.

"Stupid serving lady doesn't have any bacon," Tidus replied menacingly.

"Oh...Tifa took all the bacon," Yuna replied casually. Cloud took a highlighter from behind his hair and highlighted Tifa's name on his hand boldly before looking at it, as if thinking it over, then nodded his head tossing the highlighter behind him.

Rinoa came by and stood next to Yuna's chair. "Hey Yunie," She greeted. Yuna twiddled her fingers at her and continued to sip her orange juice.Rinoa continued to stand.

"Uh...Rinoa, have a seat I guess," Cloud said puzzled. Rinoa cleared her throat. Vincent then looked up half way and got the message, proceeding to get out his chair to let Rinoa sit next to Yuna. He then walked outside and left the doors swinging as he left.

"What's up with him?" Tidus asked prodding a donut with his knife.

"Tidy! You're not eating that are you? That thing is bad for you!" Yuna said sternly.

"I only got it to pick at it _Yuna,_ geez...," Tidus replied crossing his arms.

Cloud sniffed. "I miss bacon," He said and hung his head.

"Anyway, what _is_ wrong with Vincent? This was the first time I've seen him outside his room...," Rinoa said.

"Eh, I dunno. Vincent's always weird and stuff, why do you guys care now?" Cloud replied digging his head into his arms. Rinoa shrugged.

"Hey! Like look whose here!" Yuna suddenly cried getting up from her chair and running to the door. Quistis and Auron had come inside. Yuna and Quistis shrieked and hugged followed by Rinoa's squeal of excitement and she and Quistis proceeded to hop up and down holding hands.

"That was...odd...," Cloud noted as he watched.

"It was so sudden. If I blinked, I would have missed it," Tidus replied in a mystical voice. Auron walked to their table and sat down. "Auron, my man," Tidus greeted and he and Auron pounded fists. Cloud nodded at Auron who nodded back. Then they all heard yet another squeal of excitement from across the room and rolled their eyes at the same time.

"Chicks...," Cloud muttered.

"No need to say it. Anyway, Auron, what about the wedding, eh?" Tidus asked.

"Oh yes...it was actually scheduled for tomorrow night, but uh...I had forgotten something...and of course it must happen ahead of time...,"Auron replied and sounded rather disappointed.

"...Yes?" Cloud asked.

"I must have a...uh...," Auron hesitated and seemed utterly reluctant to say it until Cloud urged him along with his hand. "Ok...I need to have a bachelor party. But really I don't think I need one-," Auron started to say quickly before anything happened but it was, of course, too late.

The little metal gear in the back of Tidus and Cloud's heads started to un-rust and spin slowly, then faster and faster.

"Did you say..._ bachelor party_?" Cloud and Tidus cried in unison. Auron looked like he wanted to be somewhere else or possibly climb under a rock.

"Yes," He replied and hung his head. The gears exploded, thus Cloud and Tidus jumped up on their chairs and started whooping, punching the air and cheering.

"This is awesome!" Tidus yelled.

"Yeah! Woohoo, baby, _yes_!" Cloud yelled and started to boogie on the chair.

Yuna, Rinoa, and Quistis watched them rolling their eyes and shaking their heads.

"Men," Yuna muttered.

"No need to say it," Rinoa replied.

Tidus and Cloud started to do the can-can with their arms around each other's shoulders and singing, "Ninety-nine bottles of beer at Auron's party, ninety-nine bottles of beer-!" then laughing, giving each other high fives.

"Tidus, come down from there you're making a scene," Yuna ordered.

"Cloud, you're simply an idiot," Tifa said also. They grumbled and got down from the chairs, but still grinning from ear to ear.

"Somebody kill me now," Auron muttered.

"Don't worry, I'll have some rules for you guys' 'bachelor party'," Quistis said sternly.

"Nooo!" Tidus and Cloud moaned like they were twelve year olds who had gotten their PlayStation 2's taken away.

"You go Quistis!" Yuna encouraged and Rinoa nodded.

"_No_ strippers," Quistis said first of all. We all saw that one coming.

Tidus and Cloud's jaws dropped open.

"_No way man_!" Cloud protested.

"Auron, do something about this!" Tidus cried pleadingly. Auron shrugged.

"I don't really care," Auron replied.

"Of course you don't care, you've got Quistis," Cloud muttered out of the corner of his mouth.

"Secondly, don't try to drink _too _much, and I mean till the part where you're actually throwing up!" Quistis said.

"That's the best part!" Cloud groaned and Tidus slapped his forehead shaking his head.

"I can already tell this isn't going to be fun at all," He said.

"Tidus _always _comes back with something over his head when he's completely drunk," Yuna added. "That way I'll know."

"That's not true!" Tidus cried shifting his eyes.

"Gee Quistis, should I bring a list of emergency numbers as well?" Cloud asked sarcastically. Quistis reached into her purse, taking out a list, and shoved it at Cloud.

"There," She said haughtily.

"I'm seriously not believing this," Cloud said looking down the list. "You've got 911 on here five times!"

"So you won't forget!" Quistis replied.

"What a way to crush a man's soul," Tidus said sadly with Cloud nodding solemnly beside him.

"Whatever, you guys are so stupid, don't act like you've never partied before! Besides, this is Auron's bachelor party, what _more_ could you expect?" Yuna snapped. Auron turned stiffly towards Yuna and glared at her.

Tidus shrugged one shoulder. "True," He agreed.

"Well obviously it's tonight, so I'm going to go tell the others...and get my chicken suit ready," Cloud added and walked away quickly before Quistis said no chicken suits allowed.

"Tidus...you're not going to-?" Yuna asked.

"I wanted to," Tidus replied nervously.

"Well, if Cloud is bringing_ his _signature party costume...I don't see why Tidus can't bring his as well," Quistis said reluctantly.

"Yes!" Tidus cried jumping up. He then ran away yelling, "_Toga_!"

Rinoa laughed. "I remember everyone's signature party costumes...God, those were great!" Rinoa exclaimed cheerfully. Yuna and Quistis looked at her.

"You thought those were fun?" Yuna asked.

Rinoa sweat dropped. "Well...back then they were, weren't they? Oh, don't deny it! You guys liked them too!" She whined.

"Trains!" Selphie cried popping up from a hole in the ground.

"What are we going to do for your bachelorette party, Quistis?" Yuna asked.

"Eh...I don't know. Something simple...nothing too great," She replied.

"Joy," Rinoa added sarcastically.

"Hey! Bachelorette parties aren't as fun as bachelor parties and you know it...don't bite my head off!" Quistis cried.

"Hey, Tifa and I are the_ best_ party planners, we'll make it great," Yuna reassured them.

"Yeah, your parties are fun Yunie. Well...mostly because you _and_ Tidus plan them and he usually adds all the fun stuff-," Rinoa started but stopped at Yuna's expression. "I'll...go now," She quickly added and ran off.

"Don't worry, it's going to _rule_," Yuna said to Quistis.

* * *

"This is going to_ stink_," Cloud said an hour later in his room, with all the guys sitting around watching him pacing back and forth. Tidus was sitting on a crate spinning a Blitzball on his finger and pondering.

"Well...how about we get dancers to come...but they don't take their clothes off?" He asked.

"No," Auron replied bluntly.

"Hey...I know a guy that works at Vegas...we can bring an elephant!" Cloud said rubbing his hands together evilly.

"Oh my God! Just like at our graduation party? That was so awesome," Tidus agreed.

"Yeah, but this time we can ride the elephants around legally...uh, but hide the beer of course-," Cloud started but Auron cut him off.

"_No _elephants! What the heck are you thinking anyway? Damn teenagers...," Auron said shaking his head.

"Hey! We're not _teenagers_, we're just younger and like to have more fun than you old people!" Cloud cried pointing at Auron angrily.

"Yeah Auron, I mean no elephants? They're so cute and fun...plus it'd go great with my toga," Tidus said.

"No, think of something else," Auron replied.

"Pole dancers-?" Zell asked but Auron shook his head.

"Fine. I'll hire a clown," Cloud suggested sarcastically.

"No. Clowns are fucking scary man," Tidus said in a scared voice.

"I was kidding! God, I don't think I'm even gonna go at this rate," Cloud replied.

"This is pathetic," Sephiroth snarled shaking his head.

"We can play pin the tail on the Kimahri," Zell suggested and Tidus laughed.

"I hate that thing...," Tidus added suddenly all serious.

"I'm stumped. Vincent you got any ideas?" Cloud asked sitting down on the lawn chair in front of the TV and opening a beer can. Vincent was on his bed reading and looked at Cloud briefly, then returned his gaze to the book. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Tidus went over and opened it.

"Babes, what's up?" Tidus asked Yuna who looked a little nervous.

"God! Quistis is just as bad. She won't let us do_ anything_! She didn't even like the cute baby elephant idea...," Yuna said walking in the room.

"Hey! This is a guys room, no chicks allowed!" Cloud protested. Yuna rolled her eyes at him and sat on the edge of a bed.

"So what now?" She asked looking at Tidus.

"I have no clue. Auron is just as bad too. He wouldn't go for the elephant _either_!" Tidus cried. Auron shook his head. Then Rinoa suddenly came in shrugging.

"She didn't go for the limo idea either," She said to Yuna and walked over to Squall, taking a seat on his lap.

"Argh! You guys have to leave! We're thinking of our_ own_ ideas!" Cloud cried at Rinoa and Yuna.

"No! We need to do something together because this is getting way out of hand! We might as well hire Barney or something," Yuna replied.

"Together...wait...that's it!" Tidus cried.

"What do you mean?" Auron asked.

"We should have a combined party! It'd be way more fun," Tidus suggested. Everyone considered this for awhile.

"Are you sure that's even legal?" Cloud asked.

Tidus shrugged. "Hasn't stopped us before!" He replied.

"I like that. Nice idea Tidy!" Yuna agreed.

"Yes!" Tidus cried triumphantly and looked at Auron. "What about it? If you don't like this idea, then I'm not even going!"

Auron looked at everyone. "Fine. I'll go with that," He finally said.

Everyone cheered and high fived each other.

Auron walked out of the room and five seconds later came back. "Quistis said no. Also she said she'd come up with her own idea," Auron said. Everyone groaned.

"This stinks!" Rinoa cried angrily.

"Fine. We'll just go with whatever Quistis wants," Yuna said to Rinoa getting up. Rinoa got up too nodding and they left.

"What are _we _doing then?" Cloud asked Auron.

"Just throw a party, right? Nothing else," Auron said and left too.

Cloud made sure he was gone then said, "And then we'll just see what happens, right guys?"

"Yeah, Auron doesn't have control over what _happens_, so we'll...uh...do something, right?" Tidus asked looking at Cloud who nodded.

"That's fine with me," Sephiroth agreed.

"So that's it then," Cloud said and took out his cell phone. He then started to dial on it rapidly.

"What are you doing?" Tidus asked.

"Text messaging Yuna. I need her to do something while our party is going on...," Cloud said rather mysteriously and walked into the bathroom.

"Does he even have my _permission_ to text message my girl friend?" Tidus asked angrily to himself.

Cloud came back two minutes later and said, "Don't worry. This will actually turn out to be pretty fun."

* * *

Night time, 8:37 P.M. Party Time. Well... almost.

* * *

"Ok, Quistis's party starts in like fifteen minutes," Yuna said coming out of the walk in closet while putting an earring in her ear. Tidus was struggling to put on a pair pants and fell on the floor when she came in. Yuna went over to her vanity table.

"Tidus, get up," Yuna said and hurriedly put on the other earring, then splashed herself with perfume.

"Hey, no rush here, my party is later than yours," Tidus replied getting up and diving under the bed. He rummaged around then took out a long box, blowing out the dust on the top. "I've been saving this baby just for this...hopefully its time will come once again," Tidus said dramatically and lay it on the bed. He removed the cover and beamed. There, lay his signature Toga costume. Tidus laughed evilly and placed the wreath of leaves on his hair carefully.

Yuna turned around and groaned. "Oh Tidus! Are you seriously going to wear that?" She asked crossing her arms.

"Yeah! It's been years since I last worn it...it must come back Yuna! This is ten _times_ better then Cloud's stupid chicken suit," Tidus explained to her sternly. Yuna shrugged and turned back to the mirror. She fluffed up her hair once and swung her purse on her shoulder.

"Well, don't start off wearing it, wear it...you know...later, ok?" Yuna said.

"Duh! I know, I know," Tidus replied and removed the wreath, replacing it back in the box. Closing the box and carrying it with him under his arm, he followed Yuna out in the hallway. Tifa had just come out with Aeris and went over to Yuna.

"You ready?" Tifa asked Yuna.

"Yeah, I hope it works...," Yuna replied anxiously.

"What?" Tidus asked suspiciously.

"Oh, nothing Tidy, don't worry about it," Yuna replied and Tifa nodded.

"Fine...ok., I'll go over to Cloud's now, have fun," Tidus said, kissing Yuna then waving at everyone else as he left. They waved back and headed towards Quistis's room.

"You didn't tell Tidus right?" Tifa asked Yuna.

"No! Cloud told me it had to be a surprise," Yuna replied.

Rinoa and Squall came out of their room in front of them.

"Rinoa! Oh, uh...hi Squall," Tifa added.

"Squally, you can go ahead and go to Auron's party. We'll just be going to _Quistis's_ party now," Rinoa explained, winking at Yuna. Squall nodded and walked away. Rinoa then squealed quietly and hopped up once. "This is so exciting!" She whispered.

"Rinoa, you're so going to give us away I can see it now," Tifa groaned slapping her forehead.

"Oh...sorry," Rinoa replied and pretended to zip her lips.

"Alright, enough talk, let's get into action," Yuna said and walked forward boldly. Yuna knocked on the door and Quistis opened it.

"We ready to go?" Quistis asked smiling.

"Yeah!" Everyone replied a little too enthusiastically. Quistis lead the group outside, to a court yard.

"Like...oh my God," Yuna said under her breath.

There was a table set up with snacks and cake, and cute petting zoo animals were running around.

"Isn't it adorable!" Quistis gushed. She ran over to a llama and hugged it, laughing as it licked her face.

"Are we at a five year old birthday party...Or a bachelorette party?" Tifa asked. Yuna slapped her forehead. Rinoa suddenly laughed as a goat nipped at her belt.

"Oh, I get it! Nice _job_, really! I think I might hire you for my _own _bachelorette party!" Rinoa said laughing as she took out a five dollar bill and placed it on the goat's head. Yuna and Tifa stared at her.

"Uh...Rinoa...that's a _real_ goat," Yuna finally said. Rinoa's smiled dropped.

"What? Oh, no!" Rinoa cried and watched helplessly as the goat ate her five. Tifa took out her cell phone and laughed evilly.

"Caption: Rinoa...thinks...goat...is stripper...," Tifa says dialing on her phone.

"Oh Tifa! Grrr...," Rinoa cried crossing her arms. Yuna's cell phone rang and she went over to a corner, speaking lowly into it.

"C'mon guys, have some chips or something!" Quistis said to the others and shoved a bowl at Aeris.

"Um...ok," Aeris replied shifting her eyes.

"Please, I haven't had chips since I was twelve," Tifa retorted turning her head.

"Really?" Rinoa asked while taking a hand ful and shoving it in her mouth.

Yuna came back and shrugged her shoulders. "Drinks?" She asked Quistis, smiling. But it wasn't her usual smile; it was the signal. It was a seductive, mocking sort of smile that Yuna doesn't usually give, well, especially not to Quistis anyway. Rinoa was busy eating chips and Aeris was inching away from a sheep that kept trying to eat her braid, but Tifa knew that smile all too well. Not that she'd ever admit, really, that she secretly watches Yuna and Tidus flirt with each other to learn how to do it--

"Hey, I know! I could get some from Cloud's car," Tifa said on cue, waving a pair of keys around.

"Drinks? From _Cloud's_ car? Uh...I don't think so!" Quistis replied sternly.

"Ah, c'mon Quistis, have some fun will ya!" Rinoa cried with a mouthful of chips while pushing Quistis on the shoulder.

"I don't know...," Quistis said uncertainly. "I _saw_ the way you guys acted that day we went to Vegas..." (Note from Princess: Man, that was so funny!)

Yuna, Tifa, Rinoa, and Aeris all sweat dropped and laughed nervously.

"She_ had _to bring up Vegas," Yuna muttered under her breath to Rinoa who nodded.

"Well I'm going, it's a little cold outside anyway...we should warm up," Tifa said and walked towards the parking lot.

"It'll be fine Quistis, besides, you need practice for your wedding day!" Rinoa said laughing lightly.

"Right...," Quistis replied, still uncertainly.

"Here we go!" Tifa declared hauling a bag over her shoulder.

Quistis's eyes widened. "_That_ much?" She cried.

"Oooh, bring it on!" Rinoa said ignoring her and rubbing her palms together.

Yuna and Rinoa cheered as Tifa dumped the contents on the table. Hehe.

* * *

At least 3 hours later...

* * *

Quistis was...uh...how do I say this? Cold, hard, _drunk_. The others just watched her and just nodded at the babble she kept talking about. The petting zoo animals had all run away, and the cake and snacks had uh...vanished mysteriously.

"Hey! I got an idea, let's head on over to Auron's...you know, check things out maybe? What about it Quistis?" Yuna suggested then after Quistis took a break to take a swig. Yuna was waving a bottle in front of her face.

"Ok!" Quistis cried and Aeris helped her walk.

"Oh Yunie! It _worked_!" Rinoa whispered cheerfully to Yuna who was smiling triumphantly.

"And Cloud thinks _he's _the master," Yuna replied with her nose up haughtily. Yuna got in Cloud's car while Aeris and Tifa helped Quistis get in the back.

"We headin' now? Aren't you going to call Cloud?" Rinoa asked taking the passenger seat.

"Nah...we'll surprise him," Yuna replied mischievously while backing up the car. Tifa rolled her eyes and crossed her arms while looking out the window. They pulled up in front of a barn whose windows were all colorful from the lights inside and music could be heard pumping through the walls.

"Wow, nice," Rinoa commented.

Yuna put down the window mirror and applied another layer of lip gloss. "Ok, let's go," She said fluffing up her hair and opening the door. Rinoa checked her hair as well and saw Tifa help Quistis out.

"Uh...Aeris will help you!" Rinoa said hurriedly and ran to catch up to Yuna who was walking up to the door.

"Wow! This is awesome!" Quistis cried loudly as Aeris and Tifa walked with her to the door too.

Yuna and Rinoa stood there grinning as they waited for someone to open the door. Cloud opened it awhile later, and smiled at them.

"Ah! Hello there _Angels_," He greeted.

"_Good morning Charlie!_" Yuna and Rinoa chorused back giggling.

"Where's the others?" Cloud asked looking over their heads.

"We're a coming!" Tifa cried and Quistis finally got hauled up the steps and she did a loud shriek of excitement as she looked inside the barn.

Cloud laughed. "Hehehe, perfect, perfect...," He replied wringing his hands evilly.

"Shut-up Cloud, a _monkey_ could have gotten Quistis drunk enough to get us here," Yuna retorted and pushed her way inside.

"Aww...so she's the only one who _is_ drunk?" Cloud asked. The others rolled their eyes at him and walked inside, leaving him alone while grumbling something.

"Babes! What are _you _doing here?" Tidus cried spinning around on his egg seat and facing Yuna and the others coming in.

"Tidy!" Yuna cried and ran to him laughing.

"What _are_ the girls doing here?" Vincent asked bewildered.

"Lighten up Vince! They just came to pay a visit that's all...," Cloud replied sitting back on his crate while throwing his can of beer in a dumpster that was not so far away.

"Uh...where the heck are we?" Tifa asked.

"This is a bar that's in a barn. Looks funky huh? There's all sorts of weird seats and tables, it's awesome," Tidus replied spinning around again on his egg seat. Yuna took a drink from a waiter and sat on a large chair that resembled a hand. Rinoa giggled and sat on a chair that was like a lava lamp.

"What the-? What are _you_ doing here?" Auron suddenly cried when he came back from somewhere and saw all the girls sitting around with drinks in their hands.

"Uh...hi Auron!" Rinoa greeted cheerfully.

"Heeeyy!" Quistis cried. Auron stared at her.

"Are you drunk? _Is she drunk_?" Auron asked.

"Isn't everyone?" Cloud replied burping. Tidus laughed and chucked a can at Cloud who dodged it and threw one back at him.

"It's on Strife!" Tidus cried and ducked behind the bar. He came back up, ready, in his toga. Cloud was already zipping on his chicken suit. "War!" Tidus cried. Cloud swiftly hauled Vincent, Squall and Zell to his side behind the turned over seats and tables and ducked low. All the girls had screamed and fled. Auron knew he couldn't do anything about the girls here so he just shook his head, and told himself to stay as far away as possible from the 'war'.

Quistis whooped and strapped on an army helmet, joining Cloud's party. "Let's destroy them!" She cried.

Cloud stared at her. "Um...ok...it's more for fun really-," Cloud started but a whip inches from his nose silenced him.

"No!" Quistis cried and stood up with an American flag background behind her. The Final Fantasy VIII battle song, or that marching song or whatever came on. "We...are to go out there...and win!" She ordered pacing back and forth.

"Yes m'am!" Cloud cried saluting.

Quistis nodded and ducked low. "Where's our ammo?" She demanded.

Squall dumped a crate full of beer cans and bottles in a pile next to them.

"Yes...Yes..._Yes_!" Quistis cried evilly and cackled. Cloud made a mental note never to get Quistis drunk again.

* * *

Meanwhile, on the other side of the battle field...

* * *

"They got Quistis! She's one tough cookie," Tidus reported through the spy glass.

"Sir Tidus, what are we to do now?" Wakka asked.

"Chill man, chill, _chill_! We just throw our ammo, and keep our strategy...who do we have in our team?" Tidus asked. Wakka looked around.

"Uh...you and me. Cloud's got everyone else, Auron is sitting in a chair far away, and the girls obviously don't count-," Wakka started.

"_Of course they don't_! God...ok...we start now. We'll show our bravery by throwing first, who cares if we're a two man team?" Tidus cried and ducked low, his hand at the ready over a can.

"Two man team?" Sneered a voice. Wakka and Tidus spun around. A godly figure with flowing hair stood above them...Tidus even blocked his eyes with one hand and squinted.

"Sephiroth."

"You're joining?" Wakka cried eagerly. Sephiroth snorted.

"No, I'm going to the bar. See ya!" Sephiroth replied and strutted off. Sephiroth left them alone and walked to the bar, where he noticed Aeris was sitting there sipping a drink. Rinoa had turned around to face Tifa and Aeris looked alone. Sephiroth strolled over and sat three seats away. He drummed his fingers on the table top and waited until the bar man came to him.

"How may I help you Sir?" The man asked.

"Uh...Er...I'll have uh...what she's having," Sephiroth replied and nodded over at Aeris who froze.

"Sorry, but uh...what's your drink called? It looks good," Sephiroth grunted to Aeris. She just froze there staring into her cup and not moving, or talking. "Uh...excuse-?" Sephiroth tried again, in the most gentle tone he could muster at the time, but Aeris got up and ran away screaming, holding her head in her hands. Rinoa and Tifa had both seen her run and then glared at Sephiroth who had ended up just staring where Aeris had run too with one finger pointed like he was about to say something.

"Sephiroth! Can't you just leave someone alone for _one minute_?" Tifa cried.

"I--Hey! I just asked the name of her drink that's all! Leave _me_ alone," Sephiroth snarled and spun back around on his chair crossing his arms.

"Poor Aeris...she'll get over it right?" Rinoa asked.

"I didn't _do anything_!" Sephiroth cried.

"Shut-up Sephiroth, you _always_ harass Aeris, leave her alone for once please!" Tifa snapped back. Sephiroth widened his eyes but turned away snarling.

"Just gimme a Bud," Sephiroth hissed at the bar man and avoided looking back at Rinoa and Tifa.

* * *

Meanwhile...

* * *

The battle was raging fierce, and both parties have run out of ammo.

"What are we going to do?" Tidus cried while trying to drink as much beer as he could to empty out bottles and cans.

"_Keep on a drinkin' Mon_!" Wakka ordered. On the other side of the battle field the party was having party member issues.

"Vincent and Squall, you guys have to help!" Cloud cried angrily.

"I don't even know why I've been pulled into this, I can't get out now! Not with all this beer flying around anyway...," Vincent replied. Squall nodded.

"Drink men, drink!" Quistis ordered snapping her whip. Cloud bent down over a doggie bowl and lapped up more beer.

"This is insane...," Vincent muttered.

"It's a bachelor party, duh!" Zell cried. After the last explosions of the recently thrown bottles were fading away, Vincent took out his gun and swiftly rolled out from their protective table shield.

"Noooo! Vincent! _Don't be a hero_!" Cloud cried extending his hand.

"Good-bye, Cloud," Vincent replied and keeping low to the ground he made his way across. He was doing fine until he heard a whistling sound and gasped as he looked up. A can was coming his way! He hurtled himself to the right and fell hard on the ground. He then quickly rolled on his back and proceeded to shoot every can and bottle that came at him. After a brief pause of invasions he wiped his forehead and took some breaths. He then got up and dove out of the battle field boundaries, finally reaching the safe zone.

"Did you see that? Vincent escaped! They are low one man!" Tidus reported to Wakka who laughed evilly. Vincent then got up, brushed himself off, and replaced his gun cooly.

"Now that's over," Vincent added to himself looking at his watch and walking to a lone table. No one knows when the battle ended, or who won. After a brief period of time however, it only has been reported that both parties fell unconscious due to too much alcohol consumption. Vincent grew bored and went outside for some air, wondering when he could go back to the hotel. But, thus his curse, he can't help staying fully awake during night time. Hehe.

But as Vincent walked down the path then took a seat at a bench, he found out soon enough that he wasn't alone. There was a giggle and Vincent spun his head around, looking down the bench. Yuna was sitting there, a coat around her covering the clothes she had come in earlier.

"Y-Y-Yuna, I didn't notice you were here-," Vincent said immediately and got back up hastily.

"Oh, no, sit down if you want. I'm just waiting until we can go back to the hotel. Auron's bachelor party basically stank beyond all putrid smells known to man," Yuna said looking ahead and smiling. Vincent chuckled and sat back down.

"Um...yeah I guess. Cloud and Tidus seemed to have a blast though," Vincent replied. Yuna shook her head laughing.

"They have a blast wherever they go, honestly," Yuna retorted. Vincent nodded and chuckled lightly again.

"So uh...well...no offense but you're usually one to be with them, having a blast. Why are you outside?" Vincent asked. Yuna shrugged.

"I didn't feel like drinking all that much...plus, _someone _has to drive," Yuna replied. Vincent laughed again.

"That's usually my job when we have parties," Vincent replied looking at the moon. Yuna laughed back.

"Yeah...or Auron's. But I don't really want to party as hard as I used to you know? Maybe taking a break wouldn't be that bad," Yuna replied.

"You're _only_ nineteen anyway, you shouldn't _be _partying hard like you do," Vincent said shaking his head. Yuna shrugged.

"Kinda hard when everyone else is doing it," Yuna replied. There was a brief moment of silence. Yuna shifted in her seat and sighed.

"Well, yes, maybe, but you're the trend setter. I don't see why you just don't party as much and maybe the others will follow," Vincent replied.

"Please Vincent, don't worry about me," Yuna laughed.

"I...I can't-," Vincent started and Yuna looked at him oddly. "I mean," He continued hastily, "I can't help worrying just a little. It hasn't been that long since...well, you know," Vincent said and looked at her a little shrilly.

"Since what?" Yuna asked anxiously.

"Since...the woods...," Vincent muttered looking down. _Why?_ He thought, _Why did I have to bring it up?_

"...I know also that it hasn't been that long...but I kinda forgot about that whole incident. I was all scared and loopy through most of it all anyway so I just rather forget about it, since it wasn't my sanest moment," Yuna laughed. Vincent gave off a weak smile.

"Yeah, you were pretty out of it...but it's not really that funny, I...don't know if you remember but you told me about your problem personally, and I don't think it's that funny. Interesting, yes...," Vincent replied.

"Yeah, Tidus thinks it's cool," Yuna laughed again. She shook her head. "And yeah, I remember telling you," She smiled at him.

"How come you told me? We're not really friends if you think about it...I mean, _Cloud _is more friends with you then I am," Vincent replied. Yuna shrugged.

"I think you're uh...trustworthy and more understanding," Yuna answered counting on her fingers. Vincent chuckled.

"Trustworthy, as in you don't want anyone else to know?" Vincent asked.

"Yeah, I don't want it getting out if that's ok. Only you and Tidus knowing is fine with me...but nobody else _needs_ to know, know what I mean? Besides, like I said, I just wanna forget about it and move on. So far the party for the wedding is pretty much over, and tomorrow is the actual event, and I need to focus on that!" Yuna exclaimed and slapped her forehead. "I_ still_ don't know what dress I'm wearing," She whined.

"You seem stressed about Auron's wedding. Is it because Tidus is the best man?" Vincent asked leaning back on the bench.

"Yes," Yuna grumbled and leaned back also crossing her arms. "I can just see it now. He'll do something out of plan somehow, and it will be totally embarrassing!"

"Doesn't sound like you have much faith in him," Vincent mused.

"Oh, like totally, I do have faith and all that jazz it's just that he always messes up at big events like this," Yuna replied. Vincent gave her a forward look. "Don't look at me like that! I still love him and stuff, it's only _because _I know him so well I know it's going to happen," Yuna said.

"I know what you mean, it's ok," Vincent smiled at her.

"There you go, understanding everything again," Yuna laughed.

"That's why I'm here," Vincent replied getting up. Yuna got up too and stuck her hands in her pockets.

"Well, I better be off too. But uh...," Yuna said.

"Yes?" Vincent asked.

"I'm kinda scared of going back in there, don't know what I'll see," Yuna replied with a growing grin. Vincent laughed.

"I'm sure you won't need a gun to protect yourself," Vincent replied taking out his gun and spinning it modestly.

"Ah, but you see, I never come unprepared," Yuna replied to him with a flirty smile and pulled out her own hand gun. Vincent's eye brows raised slightly and Yuna laughed.

"See ya later Vincent," She said with a small wave and strutted off. Vincent remained standing there, not really wanting to go back inside so soon. But all in all, he was glad anyway that he can stop worrying about Yuna and that she was fine and everything, and that gratefully she doesn't even think of what happened at the woods anymore. Vincent turned the opposite way in which Yuna headed to and walked out into the dark night.

* * *

"Oh, brother, it's like a jungle in here!" Yuna exclaimed when she came inside. She shook her head and marched over to Tidus who was strewn against a sofa with a lamp shade over his head, snoring.

"Tidy Bear, wake up!" Yuna cried shaking him. Tidus snorted and sat up, the lamp shade tilting to one side.

"Babes, sorry to sleep on ya I didn't–wait...Where am I?" Tidus asked looking around and tossing the shade aside.

"We're still at the barn sweetie, it's almost four in the morning. We should go," Yuna replied smiling at him mockingly.

"Eh...don't rub it in, here," Tidus grumbled handing her car keys.

"Find the others for me, will ya hun?" Yuna asked walking out. Tidus reached under the sofa and pulled out a megaphone.

"Everyone! Party's over! Time to go!" Tidus cried.

Rinoa stood up surprised from behind the sofa, her lipstick all smudged and her hair all over her face. "Ah, not the megaphone," She muttered, getting up clumsily on her heels. Squall got up after her.

"Ah! Not so loud man," Zell complained holding his head and appearing from under the poker table. Wakka crawled out from behind the bar. Quistis got down from the ceiling lamp. Sephiroth and Auron got up from just sitting at a table. Tifa was sleeping on top of the poker table and got up reluctantly. Aeris nervously re-appeared from the girl's bathroom.

"Where's Cloud?" Tidus asked sleepily. Everyone shrugged. Tifa went to get her coat from inside the closet and screamed. Cloud was hanging by his shirt on the hangers behind the door.

"Cloud! Get out of there!" Tifa yelled. He woke up with a start and swung around helplessly.

"Help me then!" He growled. Tifa pulled him by the front of his shirt but his boot pushed down from the door and he fell on top of her.

"Ah! Get off of me!" She cried. Cloud hastily rolled over.

"Geez, you do_ know_ that you could have messed up my hair?" Cloud yelled at her. Tifa growled menacingly.

"We're missing Vincent," Sephiroth snarled.

"He'll be back before dawn, don't _worry _," Cloud replied sarcastically brushing himself off.

"Who said I was _worried_? Sissies...," Sephiroth hissed.

"What's the hold up?" Yuna cried from the door.

"Whoa...Yuna's driving?" Zell asked.

"It's a miracle," Cloud added.

"Oh, shut-up! Now get out, now!" Yuna replied angrily.

Everyone left the barn and got in different cars to head back to the hotel. And that is it for Chapter 4? Yeah Chapter 4, yeah...I think so, so I'll just go with that. That is it for Chapter 4!

* * *

My Message To You: Alas, the anxiously awaited wedding, soon to come in the next chapter! Tune in next time... 


	5. Chapter 5: Wedding Bells

Chapter 5: Wedding Bells

The next morning.

"Hey Tifa, have you seen Yuna?" Rinoa asked Tifa as she exited her room and saw Tifa exit hers.

"Nah, I just woke up. She's probably having breakfast already," Tifa replied. They walked through the lobby towards the dining hall.

"You seen Cloud?" Rinoa asked.

"Hung over. What about Squall?" Tifa replied.

"Same," Rinoa sighed.

They walked into the hall and only saw Wakka and Zell.

"Hey guys, know where Yuna or Tidus is? Auron and Quistis? Anyone?" Rinoa asked taking a seat with Tifa at their table.

"Nah. Auron and Quistis are sleeping in, wedding day of course, Tidus is most likely suffering from a hang over, Sephiroth is probably in the sewers looking for _his_ breakfast, and well...Yuna and Vincent are over there," Wakka explained, then nodded over at the fire place where a seating arrangement of plush velvet sofas and arm chairs face it.

"Rewind," Tifa replied hurriedly, "Did you say _Yuna and Vincent_?"

Wakka shifted his eyes. "Yes...," He replied scratching his head.

"Like oh my gosh," Rinoa whispered. Then they saw Yuna walking towards them smiling.

"Hey!" She greeted taking a seat.

"Uh, hi Yunie," Rinoa replied nervously.

Yuna's eye brows furrowed. "What's up with everyone?" She asked worriedly.

"Uh...Yuna, were you seating at the fire place with Vincent?" Tifa asked.

"Yeah, so?" Yuna replied taking a bite of a muffin.

"But Yunie! It's _Vincent_! He's icky...," Rinoa said. Tifa looked at Rinoa oddly then turned to Yuna.

"Just, what's the deal?" Tifa asked.

"There's no _deal_, and no Rinoa, Vincent isn't _icky_. I was just talking to him! Geez, it's not like it's the crime of the century...," Yuna replied.

"Bu-ut Yu-na! He's...he's...an-an out cast, he's...you guys never talked to each other before! Why now?" Rinoa whined.

"So he's somewhat of a loner, doesn't mean anything! You know what, he's actually a really nice guy!" Yuna replied fiercely ripping another piece of muffin and popping it in her mouth.

"Whatever you say," Tifa sighed. Rinoa looked around then lowered her voice.

"Yunie, does that mean you _like _him?" Rinoa asked. Yuna gave her the most scandalized look she could muster as a reply. "I gotta know!" Rinoa pleaded.

"Yeah, tell us!" Tifa pleaded also. Yuna gaped at them for a minute, then smirked.

"Silly, silly little ones. In no way, ever, in a million years, will I ever_ ever_ like Vincent that way. Besides, aren't you forgetting something?" Yuna asked and got up, still smirking. "_I'm _dating Tidus, so it's no use trying to encourage me to like Vincent and break up with Tidy, because _you can't have him_," Yuna said mostly to Tifa, looking at her.

Tifa's jaw dropped at Yuna who walked away smartly. "I don't like Tidus!" Tifa yelled back at her.

"Of course you don't, you like Cloud," Rinoa said absent mindedly.

Tifa growled. "Shut-_up_! I do not!" Tifa cried turning on Rinoa.

Rinoa shrugged. "Whatever," She replied.

"God, don't tell me you're going to be taking Squall's lines now, are you?" Tifa asked anxiously.

"..." Rinoa glared at her.

Cloud then came in, looking miserable. He had walked in with Aeris and was talking to her.

"What's Cloud doing talking to Aeris?" Tifa demanded.

"Ah, Tifa, if you're going to get all psycho on me I'm going to leave," Rinoa sighed.

"What ever happened to your Squall lines?" Tifa asked sarcastically.

"..." Rinoa took a sip of juice.

Cloud and Aeris sat at their table. "Hey guys," Cloud greeted in a groggy voice.

"Hey Cloud," Rinoa replied but Tifa just looked up at the ceiling and drummed her fingers against the table.

"Hang over Cloud?" Wakka asked. Cloud nodded miserably and leaned on his elbow.

"Poor Cloud, I'll go get you some water," Aeris said cheerfully and stood up.

"Thanks Aeris, you're a doll," Cloud replied burying his head in his arms.

"I can get water for you Cloud, if I _wanted _to," Tifa replied still looking at the ceiling.

"Oh Tifa, don't get all jealous on me now, my head is killing me," Cloud grumbled.

"I'm not _jealous _it's just-," Tifa started but Cloud cut in again.

"Look, _please_ don't start cat fighting now, wait 'till later, ok?" Cloud begged.

"Why?" Tifa asked sarcastically rolling her eyes.

"Because I won't be able to watch it properly with my head throbbing!" Cloud cried angrily. Tifa crossed her arms.

"Hey Cloud, did ya hear that Yuna was actually talking to Vincent earlier?" Rinoa gossiped.

"So?" Cloud asked taking a sip of water as Aeris came back.

"I think it's sort of fishy that's all, seeing as how I never saw them talk to each other before. Makes me wonder if they have been doing it in secret all along!" Rinoa replied.

"Please, Vincent? Talking to a girl? Much less Yuna?" Cloud said and started to laugh. Then everyone started to laugh but Rinoa just looked puzzled and didn't get it. Cloud then stopped and everyone stopped after him. "Anyway, I better take a nap and wake up five minutes before the wedding. Wouldn't want to miss it by sleeping in!" Cloud declared and got up. Everyone else remembered suddenly about the wedding and left.

Rinoa was walking by the fireplace on her way out and looked sideways towards Vincent who was reading in an arm chair. Rinoa stopped and started at him. Vincent felt the presence of someone staring at him so he looked up and stared back at Rinoa, who stared at him back. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent. Vincent stared at Rinoa. Rinoa stared at Vincent.

Vincent finally narrowed his eyes and said, "Hello Rinoa." Rinoa backed away and ran out through the doors. Vincent shifted his eyes and shrugged, returning to his book.

* * *

Rinoa walked into Yuna's room. "Oh Yuna! That dress looks wonderful on you!" Rinoa exclaimed. Yuna didn't respond, she just stood there. "Why aren't you responding?" Rinoa asked worriedly. She walked cautiously to where Yuna was standing. "Yuna...?" Rinoa asked in a scared voice and waved her hand back and forth in front of Yuna's face. 

"Rinoa, what are you doing?" Came Yuna's voice, but her lips didn't move!

"Eeek!" Rinoa shrieked and staggered back.

"Rinoa, what's the _matter_ with you?" Yuna asked again and Rinoa turned. The _real _Yuna was walking out of the bathroom with a robe on.

"Yuna! What the-? I thought that was you!" Rinoa pointed at the fake Yuna. Yuna tried to keep a straight face but ended up laughing hard at Rinoa who glared at her.

"No, no. That's my dummy, I try on clothes on her and stuff. That's the dress I'm wearing for the wedding, lovely is it not?" Yuna asked walking over to the dummy and tugging on the bottom of the dress to fix it.

"Yeah it is. But, don't you think it's a little, uh..._ scary _having a dummy that looks exactly like you just standing there?" Rinoa asked and sat on the edge of the bed. Yuna shrugged.

"It's great for playing pranks. Cloud falls for it every time," Yuna replied and cackled evilly. Rinoa laughed nervously and anime sweat dropped. "I can't believe I fell for it," She said.

"Teaches you right. I still can't believe you and Tifa think I'm going out with Vincent now or something," Yuna replied taking a strawberry popsicle from the mini fridge. She handed a grape one to Rinoa who ate it cheerfully.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. By the way, I thought it was great how you re-bounded with that thinking Tifa liked Tidus or something," Rinoa said. Yuna licked her lips nodding and continued to eat the popsicle. Suddenly Rinoa shrieked and jumped up from the bed. "Ah! I felt something move," Rinoa said in a scared voice. Yuna laughed.

"It was Tidus, stupid. He won't wake up," Yuna replied and chucked a magazine at the bed where Tidus's head I guess presumed to be. There was a muffled groan. Rinoa giggled and decided to throw something too. She picked up the trash can and threw it. Yuna snorted and they heard an "Oww!"

Rinoa and Yuna cracked up. "Stop throwing things at me," Came Tidus's muffled voice.

"Aw! Yuna let's stop," Rinoa replied.

"No! It's too much fun," Yuna replied and looked around for something else to throw. She picked up a tennis racket giggling. Rinoa gaped at her and shook her head. Yuna nodded but Rinoa kept shaking her head and laughing silently.

"I know you're planning something!" Tidus suddenly cried sitting up and saw Yuna holding up the racket. Rinoa started laughing and rolled onto the floor. Yuna put the racket down.

"It's not what you think," Yuna said laughing.

Tidus gasped. "Yuna! How could you?" He asked. Yuna and Rinoa rolled onto the floor next to each other and laughed. "Yeah, yeah, keep on a laughing. You'd be super mad at me if _I _tried to throw something at you!" Tidus cried and chucked a pillow at them. Rinoa screamed and rolled away, and Yuna dodged it.

"Ha-ha!" Yuna cried mockingly pointing at Tidus. Tidus stuck his tongue out at her and covered himself with the blanket again. "Eh, now he won't talk to me. Oh well, so, Rinoa, what are you wearing?" Yuna asked picking up the things they threw around and setting them back.

"It's a surprise!" Rinoa beamed.

"No way! I showed you _my_ dress! No fair!" Yuna cried. Rinoa shook her head and stuck her tongue out at Yuna too. Yuna rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine. But we should be getting ready, me and Tidus have to be there early," Yuna said walking over to the side of the bed and shaking the mound of blankets that formed a cacoon like wrap around Tidus.

"No," Tidus moaned. Rinoa laughed and nodded heading out.

"Ok, ok. See ya soon Yunie! And er...good luck trying to get Tidus to wake up I guess," Rinoa replied trying not to laugh.

Yuna growled. "Good luck indeed. Tidus, I'm going to get ready, you _better_ be up until then," Yuna said walking over to the dummy and getting the dress out.

"I don't wanna," Tidus whined.

"Tidus, this isn't the freakin' first day of school! It's Auron's wedding!" Yuna replied with pins in her mouth as she re arranged her dress. She took it with her to the walk-in-closet. (Walk-in closet?)

"Fine! I always have to do _everything_," Tidus cried throwing his arms up. Tidus got up and was about to go to his dresser when the door flew open. "Cloud! What the heck, I'm in my boxers man!" Tidus cried diving across the bed and landing on the other side so Cloud wouldn't see him.

"So? I am too!" Cloud cried jumping inside with his hands at his waist super hero like, wearing Batman boxers.

"_Yuna is just in there_!" Tidus cried pointing at the closet door.

"Then we have to hurry! All the guys are getting ready in my room, I have no idea why, but the girls are probably getting ready in one room by themselves too...whatever, c'mon!" Cloud urged him.

"Tidy, who're you talking too?" Came Yuna's voice.

"Uh...myself...hehe," Tidus replied and glared at Cloud. Cloud ushered Tidus outside but Tidus hesitated. "Shouldn't I tell Yuna?" Tidus hissed.

"No! Don't be such a kiss-up man, just go!" Cloud cried and shoved Tidus into the hallway where he fell and rolled onto the floor. Cloud snickered and closed the door behind them.

"Cloud, I'll kill you!" Tidus threatened shaking his fist.

"Believe me, I tried. Now what are you sissies doing out in the hallway with only your...er.._.unmentionables _on?" Sephiroth asked coming out of nowhere.

Cloud laughed. "Unmentionables," Cloud repeated snorting and Tidus laughed too.

Sephiroth shook his head. "Never mind. I don't think I _wanna_ know," He replied and turned around, walking down the hall way.

Tidus scrambled up from the ground and he and Cloud made a run for it to Cloud's room. But suddenly a door flew open knocking them onto the ground. Tifa appeared and goggled at them.

"Argh, Tifa! You ruin everything!" Cloud erupted menacingly. Tidus hid behind a plant but for some reason Cloud didn't bother. (Hmm...)

"Oh my God. This is way too good to be true," Tifa suddenly said and as fast as Cloud could stop her she pulled out a camera and started taking pictures.

"Ah! Gimme that!" Cloud cried and dove for the camera. Tifa pulled it away and Cloud fell on his face. Tifa cackled evilly and Cloud got back up, his face flushed.

"Oh don't get mad at me! This is pay back from what you did to _me_!" Tifa snapped.

Cloud's jaw dropped. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Cloud cried.

"No, I'm not!" Tifa cried back.

"Tifa, it was _summer camp_! I was 12!" Cloud snapped.

"It doesn't matter. You had _no_ right to do that!" Tifa snarled and as Cloud tried to get the camera again Tifa ran away and faced him.

"What happened?" Tidus mused.

"Nothing of your concern, Tidus!" Cloud cried and dove towards Tifa again but she dodged him. "Fine! You know what? Keep it! I have a wedding to get ready for," Cloud said cooly and stood up all cool like. "C'mon Tidus," He added.

Tidus waved to Tifa and followed Cloud. "You'll see Strife! Don't be surprised if there are flyers of this picture all over!" Tifa yelled at them.

Tidus poked Cloud's shoulder. "She's right you know," Tidus said.

"Ah, who gives. Seriously, that girl can take a grudge," Cloud replied knocking on the door of his room.

"You have to knock to get in to your own room?" Tidus asked puzzled.

Cloud didn't answer but instead someone said, "Password?"

"Chocobo 007," Cloud replied and they heard a lock click.

"Nice password," Tidus snorted.

Wakka opened the door. "Hey, who's the newb?" Wakka demanded not letting Tidus in.

"Yo," Cloud replied sticking his hand out. "He's with me."

Tidus looked puzzled. "Wakka! It's me, Tidus!" Tidus snapped.

"So you say," Wakka replied, and let Tidus in reluctantly. Squall was the only one already in his tux.

"Nice, Leonhart. Way better than your SeeD party suit anyway...," Cloud said. Squall glared at him. Tidus started putting his suit on, struggling a little. Cloud flopped down on the lawn chair two inches away from the TV and turned the TV on.

"Guys, you won't believe it, Tifa caught us walking through the hall way in our boxers and she took pictures of Cloud!" Tidus exclaimed trying to find his tie which was the other way around and behind his head.

"Shut up, she's not going to do anything. She knows better," Cloud replied smoothly unwrapping a candy bar.

"I don't know. You _did_ do that prank on her during Summer Camp...," Vincent suddenly replied from a far away dark corner.

"Gah! How can everyone remember that?" Cloud snapped.

"Anyone see my tie?" Tidus asked looking under a bed. Squall shook his head and spun it around to Tidus's front. "Oh! Thanks Squall buddy," Tidus said and then struggled to tie it.

"Cloud man, where's your cologne?" Zell asked looking through a drawer.

"Well, it won't be in the sock drawer now will it Zell?" Cloud snapped and pulled it out of his boot. "Here it is," Cloud replied and laughed evilly.

"You keep it in your boot?" Tidus wondered in disbelief.

"For twenty-four hour use my man," Cloud replied. Cloud passed it around so everyone could spray on a little bit. Vincent suddenly appeared from the bathroom wearing a tux with a dead black rose pinned on it for the flower.

Cloud looked at him and wolf whistled. "Hey Vincent! Spray this stuff on and Yuna will be sure to notice ya!" Cloud cried taking the bottle from Wakka and handing it to Vincent who glared at him a murderous look.

"Hold up. Yuna?" Tidus asked.

"Don't worry about it. Cloud is just an idiot," Vincent said to Tidus and swatted Cloud's hand away. Cloud grinned and shrugged.

"Ok...going once, going twice-!" Cloud said but Vincent continued to glare at him so Cloud slipped the cologne in his tux pocket and patted it. "Too bad, so sad. Vincent will continue to be miserably single," Cloud pretended to sniff and spun around snickering.

"Why Yuna?" Tidus whined.

Cloud jumped up on his bed and looked down on them all. "Alright men, we're all dolled up, and we're ready to go! So we head off now?" Cloud asked. Everyone muttered and nodded. "Good! Now, let us go...!" Cloud cried and jumped down.

They exited the room in a cool like fashion with Cloud leading the group smirking. They trooped into the lobby, but...there was no sign of anyone. "Where are the chicks?" Cloud practically demanded.

"Uh...they're getting ready. If we're lucky we probably only have uh...I dunno...two hours to wait?" Tidus replied. Cloud got steamed and sat on a chair angrily.

"They better hurry...," He threatened.

* * *

Meanwhile...

* * *

"Ah! Where did my shoes go?" Rinoa cried. 

"I think Tifa kicked them under the bed," Yuna replied powdering her face.

"Did not!" Tifa snapped putting an earring on.

"Ok, I'm ready," Aeris declared applying one last layer of lipstick.

"Oh...is my hair ok?" Yuna asked worriedly looking at her face from all angles in the mirror.

"You have short hair, it always looks fine," Tifa grumbled.

"So?" Yuna replied tufting one part then checking herself again.

"Oh, almost forgot, look what I have," Tifa said pulling out some photos from her purse. Everyone huddled around her. Yuna almost gagged.

"Is that_ Cloud_?" Yuna asked.

"Yup," Tifa replied smirking.

"And...are those _Batman_ boxers?" Rinoa asked laughing.

"Eh, they're no big deal. Tidus has Superman ones," Yuna replied. They laughed.

"Speaking of guys I guess, we should get going," Aeris said worriedly.

"Hmm...fine. Do you think Auron and Quistis are at the church yet?" Tifa asked.

"Yes! Oh no, I should be there with her. I _am_ the maid of honor!" Rinoa squealed.

"Yeah, and Tidus is one of the best men. Can you believe you have to go in with Tidus and I have to go in with is_ dad_?" Yuna replied. Rinoa giggled. "It's not funny! I rather go with Tidy than his scary dad...," Yuna grumbled.

"Eh, it's just for the beginning, you'll be with 'Tidy' all you want at the party, won't ya?" Tifa said heading out. Yuna shrugged and grabbing her purse hurriedly followed everyone out. The guys were still waiting and were staring miserably ahead or at their shoes. Suddenly Cloud jumped up.

"What is it Cloud?" Tidus asked.

"I smell them...they're getting closer!" Cloud declared. He quickly checked his hair, pulling out a comb as if it was a sword and just as swiftly fixing his hair and slipping the comb back in his pocket. (Kinda like that cartoon, Johnny Bravo? Yeah...)

The girls came in and to Cloud of course, it seemed in slow motion. But in two seconds they were already standing in front of everyone and waiting for the guys to come back to life so they could get to the wedding already!

"Babes! You look great!" Tidus complimented Yuna.

He leaned in to kiss her but she said, "No, no! Lipstick." Yuna pointed at her lips and took his hand instead. Tidus hung his head.

"Shall we go now?" Rinoa asked nervously. "I'm the maid of honor you know!"

Yuna glared at Rinoa.

"Oh right, I have to go in with Rinny," Tidus said and let go of Yuna's hand and walked next to Rinoa.

"Tidy! You don't have to _now_!" Yuna snapped. Rinoa blushed and Tidus laughed nervously and hastily moved next to Yuna again.

"Alright, everyone in the damn bus," Cloud ordered and hopped into the driver's seat.

"Shot gun!" Tidus cried and shoved past everyone to get to it first.

* * *

They parked the vehicle in the church parking lot and everyone hopped out. 

"Oh! Well I have to go meet up with Quistis, bye guys!" Rinoa said and kissing Squall on the cheek she hurried inside.

"Well, I'll see ya later Tidy, go meet up with Auron," Yuna said swinging hands with him.

"Yeah...I guess so. I'll meet you at the altar...stand next to me?" Tidus asked her smiling cutely.

Yuna returned a flirty smile. "Maybe...," She replied.

"Aw, what?" Tidus whined. Yuna giggled.

"Kidding, Tidy. I'll try and get the spot. Bye!" Yuna said and kissed him on the cheek.

Tidus hugged her. "Bye Babes." Tidus then turned around to head towards the church. He waved and blew her a kiss just before he ran to the side where the groom would be in a secret room, and disappeared.

"Wow Yuna, you really got Tidus on the palm of your hand," Tifa commented.

"Ah...even your irritating comments can't bug me now Tifa," Yuna sighed sweetly.

"Hmph," Tifa replied crossing her arms.

"I think it's sweet Yuna," Aeris said, jotting some things down on her note book. (Remember, she's doing some psychology project).

"Enough with this mushy stuff, let's get inside the freakin' church," Sephiroth growled and pushed past them.

"Oh...my pen!" Aeris cried as her favorite pink pen had flown from her hand when Sephiroth pushed her. But it was too late. Sephiroth accidentally stomped on it as he walked.

"Sephiroth!" Tifa growled.

"What? Huh?" He asked. Aeris hung her head and sniffed. Sephiroth looked down. "Oh...was that yours?" Sephiroth asked poking the destroyed pen with his boot lightly.

"Yes. It was," Aeris replied sadly.

"It's ok Aeris, let's go through the wedding then tomorrow you can continue your studies. I'll buy you a new pink pen myself," Cloud declared proudly.

"Back off Strife, I was the one that destroyed it, I am perfectly capable of repaying her back with a new pink pen," Sephiroth snarled.

"You'll end up buying her a light pink pen most likely. Everyone could tell that the old one was a magenta sort of strawberry pink color," Cloud protested. Sephiroth shifted his eyes in puzzlement.

"It doesn't matter what _color_ it is, I'll give her a new pen Strife, not you!" Sephiroth cried after awhile.

"I can't believe you guys are fighting over Aeris, this is ridiculous," Tifa noted.

"We're not fighting over_ her_, we're fighting on who will get her a new pen!" Sephiroth snapped at Tifa.

"Oh dear," Aeris muttered softly.

"Uh...can we get to the wedding now?" Zell asked.

"Wait, I have to wait for Sir Jecht," Yuna grumbled digging around in her purse for a piece of gum.

"Strife, you don't even have the money to purchase her even the cheapest pink pen they have!" Sephiroth continued.

"Oh, so you're putting down my finance budget now is it?" Cloud erupted.

Aeris backed away a little ways from them and took out another pink pen from her pocket to continue writing. Suddenly a black limo drove up into the drive, and everyone watched as it stopped and a man came out of the driver's seat to open the far back door. And, hurray for the world, stepped out Sir Jecht. But he wasn't alone. He had his arm around a lady with a short black shiny dress, that matched her shiny dark hair. They were laughing about something and when Jecht caught sight of Yuna he waved.

"Here we go again," Yuna muttered waving at him back while smiling.

"Yuna! Long time no see!" Jecht boomed. He let go of his lady partner to give Yuna a big bear hug.

"L-Long time no see either Sir Jecht," Yuna choked as Jecht practically crushed her lungs.

When Jecht finally released her he laughed, nodding. "Ah, just call me Jecht, how many times do I gotta tell ya eh? It's like this every time we meet," He said.

"Old habits die hard I guess," Yuna replied brushing herself off.

"Well, you look pretty tonight! All fit for Auron's big wedding eh? Speaking of pretty, lemme introduce ya-," Jecht took hold of the lady's hand and pulled her closer to him as they laughed. "This is Cecile! We met around a month ago," Jecht announced proudly. "Cecile, this is my idiot of a son's girl friend, Yuna," Jecht introduced.

Yuna laughed nervously and shook Cecil's hand.

"I've heard_ all_ about...Tidus? Tidus is it?" Cecile asked in this honey dripping voice.

"Yes, yes it is," Yuna replied trying hard to keep smiling.

"Where is he off to now? Oh, right, Auron made Tidus one of his best men," Jecht said in a hushed forced whisper like it was a secret. Cecile laughed but blocked her mouth.

"And that's funny how?" Yuna couldn't help asking.

"Tidus! Being a best man! As if he can do _anything_ right...," Jecht replied.

"Actually, Tidus is very capable of-," Yuna began but Jecht cut her off.

"-Getting dressed all by himself now? And all for Auron's wedding. Isn't my son sweet?" Jecht asked Cecile who continued to laugh.

"O-k, well, it was nice meeting you Cecile, and meeting once again Sir Jecht with you, but I have to go now! Okay, bye bye," Yuna said and was about to turn around.

"Whoa, whoa! Hold up. Aren't we supposed to go in together or something?" Jecht wondered.

"What?" Cecile pouted.

"Yeah...you know what? I can always go alone-," Yuna started but Jecht laughed and cut her off again.

"Nah, Yuna don't be so polite, you polite person...you. Besides, we need the practice eh? I have an idea on who's gonna be next to walk down that aisle!" Jecht cried. Yuna resisted the urge to slap her forehead and smiled faintly while forcing a laugh.

"Well, look at that! We spent the whole time talking and everyone is already inside. Let us go then Sir Jecht," Yuna said. Jecht nodded and turned to Cecile to give her a "fare well" kiss. Yuna turned away and after two whole minutes Cecile went off alone and Jecht and Yuna walked side by side in to the church.

Everyone was seated inside, of course, except Quistis. Auron was up at the altar with Tidus nearby, who had Rinoa standing next to him. Tidus waved frantically at Yuna who waved back. Then suddenly Tidus noticed Jecht next to her and his hand kinda stopped and it fell limp at his side.

"Heh, he's happy to see me," Jecht noted.

"I'm sure he is," Yuna replied. Yuna and Jecht walked up there and Yuna stood next to Tidus.

"Hi Tidy! How ya doing?" Yuna whispered to him.

"Great...up until now," Tidus hissed glaring at Jecht.

"I love you too son," Jecht replied smirking.

"Please guys, I know it's too much to ask, but can we control ourselves at least for Auron's wedding?" Yuna hissed.

"Hmph," Tidus grunted and faced forward.

"I hope you brought extra under wear though Tidus. You know how you are when in front of a massive audience," Jecht continued smirking. Tidus turned red.

"I was five," Tidus snarled.

"Not when you were twelve," Jecht corrected. Tidus started to steam.

"Tidus, please! You're embarrassing me!" Yuna snapped.

"I wish I had a nickel for every time I've said that in my life. I'd be rich," Jecht commented.

"Sir Jecht you too, stop!" Yuna hissed.

"Fine. Just saying," He replied musingly.

"Tidy don't listen to him," Yuna said to Tidus.

"Believe me, he never does," Jecht replied.

"Shut up old man!" Tidus snarled.

Auron turned around stiffly to glare at them. The whole audience was looking at them. But then, Yuna was saved by the bell, (or organ) and the wedding song started. The doors then opened and Quistis came out in her wedding dress, being led by Headmaster Cid. (Haha! Cid...)

Rinoa gushed. "She looks so pretty!" Rinoa squealed.

"Whoa. I didn't know Auron was getting married to_ that_," Jecht said. Yuna rolled her eyes. After the whole hoopla, and Kimahri bringing the rings down the aisle, everyone was free to go.

Tidus was hauling Yuna as fast as he could away from Jecht when Auron grabbed Tidus's arm. "Wait, we need ya to do signing," Auron said. Tidus sighed and with Rinoa they did some official paper signing boring stuff.

"Looks like Tidus is leaving you a lot for Leonhart's girl...," Jecht commented behind Yuna.

"No! They're just the maid of honor and best man. Why would Tidus like Rinoa-"

"-When he has you? Good question," Cloud cut her off as he approached them.

"Oh my God! If it isn't Strife!" Jecht cried.

"J man!" Cloud cried. Yuna raised an eye brow.

"Ah, if it isn't my favorite best friend of my son's whom I wish was my own," Jecht greeted and he and Cloud hugged and patted backs.

"Ah, J-man, you always say that! Ever since the first time I came over to your house after school, to help Tidus with homework when we really hung out in his room playing video games!" Cloud replied.

"I remember!" Jecht cried and he and Cloud laughed.

"...Cloud?" Tidus asked as he came back to re-join Yuna.

"Hey Tidus! Your old man is back," Cloud said patting Jecht's back.

"So I've heard...," Tidus muttered.

"What 'Whiny Tidy', you jealous?" Jecht asked.

"No! Now old man, leave my friend alone. He's _my_ best friend, not yours!" Tidus cried.

"Ah Tidus, you know me and your old man have always been tight. Right J-man?" Cloud asked Jecht.

"Indeed! Ah Cloud, what I wouldn't do to make you my own son instead of Tidus. It's sort of sad really that I have to resort to my son's best friends instead...," Jecht replied.

Then he and Cloud looked at each other and laughed. Tidus's fist shook. Jecht and Cloud headed out while talking to each other, while Tidus stayed close behind to hear what they were talking about.

"So Cloud, you dating anyone?" Jecht asked.

"Nah...just playing the field, you know," Cloud smirked.

"From what I heard, for _both_ teams, I assume?" Jecht asked. They roared with laughter together.

"What?" Yuna asked Tidus.

"Jecht is asking about Tifa and Aeris," Tidus reported.

"Oh...," Yuna replied, wondering why he didn't just say their names. But then Cecile came and hugged Jecht.

"Oh, Jecht, who's this?" Cloud asked looking Cecile over.

"Oh, yeah, Cecile doll, lemme introduce you again to a friend. This is one of my good for nothing son's friends, preferably my friend as well," Jecht introduced.

"Strife; Cloud Strife," Cloud said taking her hand and kissing it.

"Oh, how polite! I'm Cecile," Cecile replied.

"And Cecile, this is my son," Jecht said and turned to Tidus behind him.

"Oh, cute! Nice catch," Cecile said punching Yuna on the arm.

"Thanks...? Hehe...," Yuna replied nervously.

"Dad, who is this?" Tidus asked.

"This is Cecile dumb ass. My lady friend," Jecht replied.

"_Lady_ friend?" Tidus repeated.

"Yeah, what are you, deaf too? What else is wrong with you?" Jecht asked. Tidus glared at him and didn't answer.

"Guys, the bride and groom are already at the party! Let us go?" Rinoa asked holding hands with Squall who saw Jecht.

"Squall!" Jecht boomed. Squall mustered an actual smile and pounded fists with Jecht.

"Are _all_ your friends, friends with your dad?" Yuna asked Tidus.

"Yeah, it's like his plan to befriend all of them so he can tell them all sorts of secrets about me," Tidus replied slapping his forehead. As if on cue, when Cloud and Squall came back from talking to Jecht, Cloud came up trying not to laugh and keep a straight face.

"Hey Tidus, how come you can't go to petting zoos again?" Cloud asked.

Tidus growled. "I was six!" Tidus exploded.

"Not when you were fourteen," Cloud replied and he and Squall started to laugh. Well...Squall did silent laughing. Tidus sniffed and wiped his eye.

"Aw, Tidy don't cry," Yuna said.

"I just wanna go to the party now," Tidus whined. Yuna nodded and patted his arm.

"Let's go!" Rinoa pleaded. Cloud, Squall, Aeris, and Rinoa were invited to come to Jecht's limo while riding to the party place.

"You can come too Yuna doll, but Tidus can't," Jecht said to Yuna. Tidus glared at him. Yuna stood her ground.

"No way Sir Jecht, you know I don't leave Tidus! I'm staying with him, even if we _aren't _going in some fancy limo," Yuna huffed haughtily.

"Eh, ok," Jecht waved her off and closed the door. Then the limo backed up and drove down the street.

"Thanks Babe, you're great," Tidus told Yuna.

"Only because I spend more than half my time with you Tidy!" Yuna replied happily trying to make him feel better.

"We're going to be late if the rest of us don't get there soon," Zell grumbled.

"Ok then, let's go," Tidus replied with renewed courage and taking over the driver's seat.

* * *

And away they go!

* * *

Tidus drove in to the after party place. The party hall. Where you have parties for weddings. A place where there are tables and a buffet set up, and a dance floor in the back. You know what I'm talking about, if, you have ever been to a wedding. Wait is it called a reception? 

"Wow, there's a lot of people here...do you think we'll get to meet someone we haven't seen in awhile? Oh this is just like a reunion!" Yuna squealed happily.

"Let's just hope it's not someone we _wouldn't_ like to meet again," Tidus replied getting out. Everyone else got out and walked to the entrance where a gigantic man was at the front, wearing sunglasses. Yes, sunglasses. At night. The horror!

"Name," The man boomed. Yuna coughed and waved her hand in front of her face. Everyone said their name and got in.

"Tidus and Yuna?" The man asked Tidus before he could say his name.

"I'm Tidus and Yuna, yes. How did you know?" Tidus asked suspiciously. "_Do you stalk us or something?_"

"Uh...no...you're the only ones left on the list," The man replied and let them in. Tidus laughed nervously and lead Yuna inside. There was some light classical music playing as everyone was getting ready to eat dinner, and walking to the buffet table.

"Well, isn't this nice?" Yuna beamed.

"Wait two hours or so," Tidus laughed evilly. Yuna rolled her eyes and saw a hand waving.

"Yunie! _Yunie over here_!" Rinoa was calling, waving her hand frantically and hopping up and down.

"Hey look, Rinny saved us a table. Let's go!" Yuna said.

"It's nice having minions do that for you, isn't it Yuna?" Tidus asked. Yuna gasped.

"She's not my minion," Yuna protested shifting her eyes. They got to the table and Rinoa smiled at them.

"Finally! Squally and I saved this table for us four. Let's get something to eat now!" Rinoa squealed.

"Ok Rinoa, calm down a little," Yuna replied laughing and setting her purse down.

"I'm just so excited! _Aren't you excited Squall_?" Rinoa cried.

"..." Squall replied.

"Now, don't let Squall talk too much! He won't let anyone else say something," Cloud said coming up to them. Rinoa had long since flown to the buffet.

"Hey, don't we get spots at the table?" Tifa asked.

"Just do this," Cloud said and picked up a chair from another table, then kicking aside Tidus's chair he put his down in its place.

"Hey!" Tidus cried. Cloud snickered and he and Aeris went to the buffet table. Tifa growled and followed them.

Kenshin came back awhile later and looked around bewildered. "Where did my chair go?" He wondered.

* * *

Aeris, Yuna, and Rinoa were at the salad station. Hehe. Station.

"Such fancy salad stuff they have here!" Yuna said cheerfully plopping a slop of green stuff on her plate. Rinoa looked at it disgusted and saw Tifa at the meat section.

"I wanna get real food!" Rinoa complained.

"Then go ahead and get _fat_ for all I care," Yuna huffed. Rinoa sniffed and cautiously got a tiny bit of the green stuff.

"No, no, no, no," Cloud repeated tossing different things behind his back as he surveyed the food. One by one the food he threw hit Kenshin on the head and he finally passed out.

"Cloud! Just pick something," Tifa hissed.

"I can't! It's all so-," Cloud started when he dropped his plate.

"Cloud!" Tifa cried angrily, watching the place fall and break.

"They have...bacon," Cloud said in a hushed whisper and his eyes got all glassy like and big. Tifa looked scared for a second. Cloud whooped and ran like a bullet to the bacon place. So fast he ran, that he couldn't stop at the moment he wanted to and accidentally slid under it, tripping over the bacon guy who flew up and screamed. Bacon Man then landed on the dessert section, catapulting the whole table (the Bacon Man was fat) towards a certain person, who had just woken up from consciousness, and then at that instant got bombarded with Jello, chocolate mousse, a table, pudding, cake, cupcakes, cookies, brownies, cheese cake, muffins, and a strange glowing slime I have no idea what it is.

Kenshin was sent to an ambulance ten minutes later.

"Cloud! See what you did? You hurt Kenshin!" Tifa growled. A bunch of weeping fan girls followed two paramedics who were taking Kenshin with his knocked out swirly eyes away with a stretcher.

"Bacon, my beloved bacon," Cloud swooned as he kissed a bunch of bacon slices as they all fell upon him lightly. Everyone got back to their table and started to eat.

"Yuna, what the heck are you attempting to eat?" Tidus asked as Yuna sat down. Yuna was about to say (_About_ to say what the green stuff was called! Almost...) When they hear booming laughter.

"J man! Over here!" Cloud called to Jecht and invited him to their table. Tidus got up as Jecht sat down.

"I lost my appetite," Tidus said and was about to walk away when Yuna pulled him down to his seat again. As everyone started to have some small talk, Aeris writing some stuff down, everything went ok. Yeah, I know, a miracle. Wait. It didn't go ok for long...

"So Cloud, how's business going?" Jecht asked.

"Oh, wonderful, just great," Cloud replied.

"And what about those little orphans you take care of?" Jecht wondered, hiccuping. Too much to drink, Jecht?

"Orphans? How sweet of you Cloud!" Cecile beamed.

"Yeah, those kids are great. Every time I wake up to their smiling faces it's like I'm doing something good for the world, you know?" Cloud replied happily.

Tifa grumbled something nobody could hear about Cloud never even seeing the orphans while she did all the cleaning and cooking and he never did shit.

"Tidus, I'm afraid to ask you what's been going on with _your_ life," Jecht suddenly said.

"No worries Old man, nothing interesting there," Tidus fired back.

"Oh nonsense! Yuna's dad emailed me the other day that you two were planning to move in together sometime soon."

Yuna suddenly started coughing and choked on a lettuce leaf. Tidus patted her back but she quickly recovered, saying, "Oh, daddy is such a joker. Tidus and I aren't old enough to move in together yet, no, it's too early..."

"Yeah, um, what she said," Tidus replied nervously.

Rinoa suddenly noticed Yuna's look and changed the subject. Alright, so things went back to normal after _that_...

* * *

Then Auron and Quistis made their grand entrance, and everyone applauded. Then those who were finished with eating went to the dance floor to dance "fancy like" for awhile, as Auron and Quistis started the traditional groom/bride dance stuff.

Rinoa blew out of her chair.

"_Like oh my God let's dance!_" Rinoa cried to Squall who stared at her with such a pleading look that if it were me, I would have melted. "Oh c'mon don't tell me you don't know how, you do know! Remember? Remember? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? 'Member? '_Member_?" Rinoa cried. (Wow, Rinoa, go ahead and spazz out)

Squall looked at her worriedly as if she was going mental. Which, if you ask me, might have been the case...

But Rinoa wouldn't take no for an answer and hauled him to the dance floor. "I wish I had a camera," Cloud snorted.

"I wish I had a dance partner," Tifa sighed.

"I wish Yuna would let me eat! Geez, what is it with women and dancing...," Tidus grumbled cause Yuna was pulling on his arm for him to go dance.

"Oh Tidy please, please, please!" Yuna pleaded.

"No!" Tidus cried.

"Wow, Tidus is standing up for himself...," Cloud noted.

But then Yuna leaned in real close and gave Tidus big puppy dog eyes. Tidus sighed.

"Fine...fine...let's go," Tidus said and pushed his plate away.

"Yay!" Yuna cheered.

"Then again maybe not," Cloud noted again rolling his eyes. Tidus and Yuna left, and Cloud drummed his fingers against the table frustrated.

"Oh God, fine, _fine_! Since _everyone_ seems to be dancing...," Cloud said awhile later. Tifa looked up. "Hey, uh...wanna dance?" Cloud asked Aeris turning to her.

"Um...ok...sure...," Aeris replied uncertainly. Tifa looked away muttering something. When Cloud and Aeris left, Tifa looked around then took Aeris's pink notebook. Tifa hummed while she flipped through it.

"Seems to have a lot of junk on Sephiroth...," Tifa noted. " 'Deep, personal issues, arrogant, uncontrollable acts of sneer commentary, might even be involuntarily to act such a way...'," Tifa read. Tifa was about to turn to a page where she saw her name when someone sat down next to her and she shut the note book closed.

"Meddling into the Aeris's stuff I see? Well, read anything interesting?" Vincent asked smirking.

"Oh, shut up Vincent. Well...but since you asked anyway, I think Aeris is planning to make Sephiroth her alpha guinea pig," Tifa retorted.

Suddenly Vincent chuckled. "I find that funny," He replied.

"I find it weird. If you ask me, I think Aeris should have therapy on herself before she does it on others," Tifa replied sternly.

"Eh, well...I wouldn't kill her plans just yet. I wanna see how that therapy session with Sephiroth ends up going," Vincent said, and then proceeded to take a sip of a red drink he brought with him.

"What is that?" Tifa asked curiously.

"Uh...tomato juice...," Vincent replied shifting his eyes.

"Yuck...but, I guess that stuff is good for you," Tifa muttered

"So...you gonna muster up the courage to ask Cloud to dance?" Vincent asked pushing his juice away.

Tifa glared at him and retaliated. "You going to ask Yuna?" She smirked.

Vincent's own smirk dropped and his eye twitched. "No," He replied sternly.

"Why not?" Tifa asked.

"Because I don't want to dance, and also because she's dancing with Tidus. Plus...I'd hate to dance with her just as much as she would hate to dance with me," Vincent explained cooly.

"Fine...we're even. And just to get the record straight, I don't like Cloud that way...," Tifa replied shrilly.

"I'm sure you do-I mean don't!" Vincent replied hastily and Tifa glared at him. Suddenly when Tifa and Vincent looked around nobody was at their tables anymore, and they were in a crowd at the dance floor. They seemed to be watching something...

"Bet you 500 Gil it's Yuna putting on a show," Tifa said getting up with Vincent to see what was the hoopla. (Hehe I like that word)

"Deal. I say it's Cloud already drunk and singing 'Pretty Woman'," Vincent replied and Tifa laughed. They tried to see over everyone's heads. Soon disco music filled the place, and everyone cheered as the lights turned off except for a light up floor.

"Yuna! It's our song! I mean...our _other_ song!" Tidus cried.

"Oh yeah!" Yuna cried back and they walked onto the floor, holding hands, ready for their performance where everyone made a crowd around them on the floor. Two spot lights came over who else, but Tidus and Yuna :

Tidus: Shake it, shake it!

Yuna: Shake your groove thing! Shake your groove thing! Yeah yeah!

Yuna & Tidus: Show em' how we do it now...!

Tidus: Let's show the world we can dance...

Yuna: Bad enough to, strut our stuff!

Tidus: The music gives us a chance ...

Yuna: We do more, out on the floor!

Tidus & Yuna: Groovin' loose, or heart to heart!

Tidus & Yuna and a mysterious background voice: We put in motion every single part!

Everyone: Funky sounds, wall to wall

Everyone: Were bumpin' booties havin' us a ball y'all

Everyone: Shake your groove thing! Shake your groove thing! Yeah yeah!

Tidus: We got the rhythm tonight...

Yuna: All the rest, no, we're the best!

Tidus: Our shadows crash in the light...

Yuna: Twist and turn it, we keep burnin' !

Tidus & Yuna: Shake it high, shake it low!

Everyone: We take our bodies, where they wanna go!

Tidus: Feel that beat, never stop!  
Yuna: Oh hold me tight! Spin me like a top!

(-The Song Goes Slow-)

Tidus: There's nothing more, that I'd like to do...

Yuna: Then take the floor and dance with you

Yuna and Tidus: Let's keep dancing...let's keep dancing!

Crowd: SHAKE IT! SHAKE IT!

Tidus: Groovin' loose, heart to heart!

Yuna: We put me in motion, every single part!

Everyone: Funky sounds, wall to wall!

Everyone (Cloud extra loud): Were bumpin' booties havin' us a ball y'all!

* * *

The song ended and everyone applauded. "I guess we both lose 500 Gil," Tifa mumbled to Vincent who nodded.

Cloud suddenly slid onto the floor where Yuna and Tidus left after they bowed and started in a bad high pitched voice, "_Pretty woman! Walking down the street_!"

Everyone kinda muttered an excuse and walked away, leaving Cloud on the floor curled up and screaming into the microphone.

"_Pretty_-wait...where did everyone go?" Cloud asked after awhile getting up.

"Dashing performance Yuna, as always," Jecht was saying to Yuna as Cloud came running to catch up with someone.

"Uh, thanks Sir Jecht," Yuna replied laughing nervously.

"Did you think I was good J-Man?" Cloud asked Jecht excitedly.

Jecht laughed out loud then suddenly turned serious. "No," He replied flatly and Cloud hung his head. Tidus snickered.

"Oh Yunie that was great! I haven't heard that song in years!" Rinoa beamed and everyone agreed. "If only _we _had our own dance...," Rinoa muttered to Squall who anime sweat dropped.

"Well, I'm going to take a break, I'm going to the bathroom," Yuna said and kissed Tidus on the cheek and walked away. Squall, Tidus, and Cloud then got in a big discussion over something stupid like sports and stuff awhile later and yeah...anyways, let's follow Yuna.

* * *

Yuna walked to the bathroom humming. There was a line though so she sighed and stood there waiting. Vincent was walking to the guy's bathroom line, and saw Yuna's back. He wanted to turn around but he had to go, so...he got in line with his head hung low. Wakka came out of the bathroom and noticed Vincent.

"Do _not _go in there!" Wakka warned Vincent who grimaced as Wakka passed by.

"Oh, hi Vincent!" Yuna greeted cheerfully because she had turned to see who Wakka was talking too.

Vincent turned to her stiffly. "Hello Lady Yuna," He replied modestly.

"Wow! I like your tux...the dead black rose is very original!" Yuna beamed. Vincent looked down at the pinned flower and shifted his eyes.

"Thanks...?" He replied, the question in his voice unconvincing.

"Yeah, really," Yuna giggled.

"Oh well, in that case, I guess it's safe to say you look stunning in your dress as well," Vincent replied but then the line moved and he moved with it, reminding him that he was at a wedding, in line for a bathroom, and there were a lot of people around him that could have heard him compliment Yuna on her dress. He shuddered.

Yuna smiled and nodded. Yuna then moved a place in line as well whistling. "So, do _you _think the wedding is going well?" Yuna asked awhile later.

Vincent guessed she couldn't stand two minutes without talking to someone so he allowed himself to answer. "Eh...it's ok. The food was good and the drinks well provided, and by the looks of things the dance floor isn't that bad," Vincent replied turning around and watching Cloud swinging a bottle around on top of the shoulders of a group of people as they chanted "Whoop! There it is! Whoop! There it is!"

"I'm just glad no one's gotten drunk yet," Vincent added sarcastically. Yuna laughed and Vincent turned back to the line. They both moved up a space.

"How long do you think you're going to stay?" Yuna asked.

"I...really don't know," Vincent sighed.

"Oh, ok," Yuna replied flipping her hair and moving up another space. Finally Vincent and Yuna were next, but when Vincent went inside he quickly backed out.

"Oh...my...God...," He stammered and covered his nose.

"Bad?" Yuna asked. Vincent didn't even answer but just moved over and when he was far enough he started to breathe hard until he got his breath back. "You can always go in the girl's bathroom, I'll make sure no one sees you!" Yuna suggested.

Vincent looked at her in horror. "I rather not...," He replied shifting his eyes.

"Oh c'mon! No one's looking!" Yuna persisted and pushed him through the door before he could protest further. Vincent had his eyes closed but Yuna laughed.

"Please! Out of everyone I know, I'd think for you to be more mature then that!" Yuna said. Vincent peeped an eye open and was genuinely surprised. "No pink fountains, no unicorns, no rainbows. Just sinks and stalls," Yuna said smiling slyly. She then went over to the mirror and started applying more make up on herself. Vincent looked around then went in a stall.

Right when he came in, he heard the door open and the sound of shoes on the tiles. "Hey Yunie!" Came Rinoa's voice.

"Rinoa! Gosh, it seems like forever, I was waiting in line this whole time," Yuna grumbled.

"God, I mean, remember how everything was peaceful and alright during dinner and the ball room dancing? It's a complete jungle out there! After you and Tidus did that disco dance, everyone started to drink more and dance more and well...I haven't seen Auron or Quistis since! Me and Squall had to hold hands throughout the whole dance floor to not get lost!" Rinoa cried.

Yuna laughed. "I'll bet you anything Quistis and Auron left their own wedding party. All they needed was the wedding to be officially married, they didn't have to stay at the party, so when everyone got drunk enough they probably left," Yuna replied and Rinoa giggled.

"That's_ so _like them," Rinoa agreed. There was a faint sound of rummaging through their make up bags and Vincent resisted the urge to bang his head over and over again at the stall door.

"Hmm, not to be fishy but...is there someone else in here or is it just me?" Rinoa suddenly asked. Vincent bit his finger nail nervously.

"Uh, no, I don't think so...," Yuna replied, sounding a little as if she was suppressing a laugh.

"Yunie! You're trying so hard not to smile, what's up?" Rinoa asked. Then there was the door again, and more foot steps.

"Hey guys," Tifa greeted. Vincent silently slapped his forehead.

"Tifa! I haven't seen you like, all night. Have you and Cloud been secretly kissing somewhere?" Rinoa asked and she laughed with Yuna.

"No! Cloud is out on the dance floor doing the conga line or something, or well..._trying _too," Tifa replied.

"I wonder what Tidy is doing...he better not be attempting to kill his dad or something," Yuna replied worriedly.

"Yeah, that'd be bad!" Rinoa agreed.

"Yeah, bad that I'd miss it!" Yuna replied and they all laughed.

"Yeah well I gotta go badly, hold on," Tifa said and ran to a stall that, so happened to be, the one Vincent was in.

"Wait!" Yuna cried and Tifa stopped.

"What?" She asked hopping up and down. "I have to go!"

"I...uh...I'm going in that stall!" Yuna cried and ran inside before she could.

"Um...ok?" Rinoa said puzzled. Tifa just shrugged and ran to the one next to it.

Yuna panted and smiled at Vincent. "Saved ya!" She whispered.

"Barely!" He hissed back. He shook his head. "When am I going to get out of here?" He asked.

"I don't know, as soon as they leave. But I'll have to go with them or else I'd look suspicious," Yuna whispered back. They heard a toilet flush and for some reason Vincent jumped up onto the their toilet seat and leaned on the walls with this hands.

"So they won't see my feet," Vincent replied to Yuna's puzzled expression.

"Yuna, you done yet?" Rinoa asked walking to the stall and knocking on it.

"Uh, actually, I might be awhile," Yuna replied trying not to laugh. She turned around and looked up at Vincent, winking at him. Vincent wondered what she thought so funny about this and rolled his eyes.

"Well I'll wait for you then," Rinoa replied and Vincent let out a groan accidentally. Rinoa stared in horror at the stall and Yuna blocked her mouth from laughing. "Yunie, are you...ok? Did you have the shrimp or something?" Rinoa asked worriedly.

Yuna and Vincent looked at each other with suppressed laughter and Yuna replied, "Yeah, told ya it was going to be awhile!"

Then Tifa came by next to Rinoa. "Yeah right Yuna! You're lying!" She suddenly cried.

"What? What do you mean?" Yuna asked sternly.

"You're allergic to shrimp!" Tifa snapped and laughing she pushed Rinoa against the stall crying, "Let's have Rinoa come in and check!"

"Wait no!" Yuna cried but it was too late. Rinoa got pushed against the stall opening the door which pushed Yuna back against Vincent who lost his balance and fell forward landing on top of Yuna and Rinoa.

"Oh my God!" Tifa cried at the scene. Rinoa quickly got up.

"Yunie!" She yelped.

"Ow!" Yuna complained rubbing her head and sliding out from under Vincent who rolled over and rubbed his shoulder. "This is _so_ not what it looks like," Yuna said to Rinoa and Tifa's facial expressions.

"I...uh...um-uh-I can-uh," Vincent sputtered but nothing useful came out.

"Vincent! What the hell were you doing in the girl's bathroom?" Tifa exploded.

"Yuna, did you_ know_ he was in that stall?" Rinoa asked.

"No! Well, yeah-that's not the point! That wasn't _why _he was in there!" Yuna cried.

"You know what, I don't even want to know," Tifa replied shaking her head and walking away.

"Tifa! Oh my God you're so immature!" Yuna cried at her angrily. Rinoa helped Yuna up.

"Yunie, what really happened? I believe you," Rinoa told her.

"Vincent couldn't go in the men's bathroom so I let him go in here because at the time no one was in here! Then you and Tifa came in and so for Vincent not to get caught I went into his stall and acted like I had to go! Vincent, say something!" Yuna cried spinning around to face Vincent.

"Y-Y-Yeah that's what happened," Vincent replied nervously.

"Ok, ok. Don't worry about Tifa, she just probably wanted something like this to happen to you," Rinoa replied.

"What do you mean she 'wanted'? Does Tifa not like me? Everyone likes me!" Yuna pouted. Rinoa laughed nervously and patted Yuna on the back and told her not to worry about it.

"How am I going to get out of here unnoticed?" Vincent asked behind them as they walked out.

"Stay behind us, and maybe nobody will notice ya," Yuna told him. Rinoa went first and looked around, then pushed Yuna and Vincent out.

"I, uh...I'm going to go," Vincent told Yuna looking up at her.

"Ok, bye!" Yuna replied waving at him.

"Yunie, maybe we should go back to our table," Rinoa told Yuna once Vincent left.

"Ok, I need to see what Tidus is doing," She agreed and they walked over there.

* * *

They unfortunately had to get through the dance floor first to get to their table, and it was like being in a Russian night club.

"I can't get through all these people!" Rinoa cried waving her hand in front of her face from the smoke machine. Yuna didn't reply and stood stock still. "Yunie?" Rinoa cried worriedly and faced the direction she was staring at. "Oh...my...God...," Rinoa gasped.

They saw another conga line, but it wasn't Cloud leading it. It was Seymour. With a Hawaiian skirt and coconut top and he was wearing a traffic cone as a hat. (What the fuck?)

"Oh my fucking God," Yuna cried.

"This is insane!" Rinoa cried also and actually wanted to cry.

"Hurry, let's go through here and _don't_ make eye contact with him!" Yuna warned and they moved through the crowd, trying not to look at Seymour.

After a long time they finally reached their table, where Yuna could see that Jecht was booming about something and Tidus was ready to lose it.

"Yuna! Come ere'!" Jecht called once he noticed Yuna. Yuna plastered on a smile and walked over there, taking a seat next to Tidus.

"Anyway, Cloud was just talking about what he'd like to name his kid, and all that," Jecht started.

"After me of course!" Cloud cried holding up his drink.

"Tidus wanted to name his after himself too, but no, everyone agrees he should name it after me," Jecht continued. Yuna had lost track on what they were talking about and also wondered how the heck they got to that conversation.

"The only thing I'm naming after you old man is a restraining order!" Tidus cried angrily. Yuna put her hand on his arm. Then suddenly Quistis came by and sat at their table and everyone greeted her cheerfully.

"Hey everyone! Well, the party is almost over and well...we have to do one thing first!" Quistis said and waved her bouquet around.

"Oh! I almost forgot about that!" Rinoa squealed. Quistis nodded and all the girls got up and made a crowd on the dance floor. The music stopped for a moment so that Quistis could throw the bouquet.

"I'm so getting that bouquet!" Rinoa cried snapping a football helmet on. Yuna looked at her weirdly and stood with her in the front.

"Woopee! Bouquet throwing time!" Seymour cried in a high pitched voice and started hopping up and down in the back of the crowd.

"One...Two...Three!" Quistis cried and threw it. All the girls jumped up (Rinoa dived/flew) but someone in the back corner who was talking to Squall suddenly caught the bouquet on his head. The bouquet fell on Zell's arms and he looked around confused. Suddenly Squall dropped his glass and ran out of there, but it was too late for Zell. A herd of women charged and dove at him and he was lost in the crowd. Rinoa stomped her foot angrily and threw the foot ball helmet over her shoulder.

"Oh Kenshin, I'm so glad you're ok!" A fan girl squealed as Kenshin came walking in a slow pace with crutches.

"Yes I'm-," He started but a foot ball helmet came out of nowhere and hit him on the head and with another "Oro!" he fell to the floor unconscious once again with another concussion to the head.

"Rinoa it's ok, next time we have a wedding you can get the bouquet," Yuna comforted Rinoa who sniffed.

"No! I_ never_ get the bouquet! It's a curse I tell ya!" Rinoa cried. Tidus came over to them with a large chunk of cake and he was eating it furiously.

"This is good cake and all, but after I'm done I wanna go home!" Tidus told Yuna sternly.

"Me too," Rinoa sniffed.

"Ok, let's go thank Quistis and Auron and get the heck out of here," Yuna said and walked over to Quistis who was talking to some other people. After that Tidus and Yuna went back to their table to get their stuff and tell the others that they were going home. Squall agreed to go home, and so did Tifa and Aeris but Cloud was still talking to Jecht all drunk.

"And then, and then I told him, listen to what I told him, I was like 'Yo, you gotta die man, this whole taking over the world thing, it isn't right' and he's all 'yeah I know, whatcha gonna do about it' and I was all 'I'm gonna like kill you dude' and then it was so funny I was like 'die!' and he was all 'no!' and then, and then, well it's all hazy from there but after that I just let my sword do the talking," Cloud said taking a swig of his drink and hiccuped. Jecht laughed.

"I _love_ those poodle jokes!" He barked and he and Cloud laughed together.

"Cloud, we're going home, c'mon!" Yuna ordered Cloud shaking him.

"No Yuna, c'mon, it's not even noon yet," Cloud protested and shrugged her off.

"Cloud! It's four in the morning! Sorry Sir Jecht, but we're all going to go now, it was nice meeting you again though," Yuna told Jecht.

"C'mon Cloud, let's go," Tifa said and took his arm, dragging him on the floor.

"Bye J-man!" Cloud waved.

"Bye everyone! Drive safely! Stay in school!" Jecht called out.

"My history teacher hates me," Cloud grumbled as Tidus helped Tifa drag him out the door. "I have an F in biology!" He continued. Yuna started to laugh with Rinoa.

"God, Cloud is so drunk right now," Rinoa said.

"You think?" Tifa snapped.

"Yoho, yoho! A pirate's life for me!" Cloud sang and got up from the ground where Tifa and Tidus dropped him.

And that is it for the wedding. Whose going to drive everyone back to the hotel? Will Seymour get a ride with anyone or will everyone just be too scared? Uh...let's see...more questions, more questions...will Vincent be haunted by the embarrassing moment he had in the girl's restroom? Will Rinoa catch the bouquet at another wedding ever? Will Zell survive from the pack of women now making a mountain of themselves on top of him so he can't breathe? Will Kenshin ever be safe for 10 minutes without someone stealing his chair or throwing something at his head? Tune in next time for chapter 8!


	6. Chapter 6: A Pool Party And The Beach

Chapter 6: A Pool Party And The Beach

Yuna and Tidus stumbled into their room.

"I'm so tired," Yuna moaned and lay across the bed still in her dress.

"Hey! You didn't have to drag Cloud singing 'Three's Company' to his room! Him and that heavy head and, and...and those heavy boots...," Tidus grumbled. Yuna laughed and kicked off her shoes. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Tidus kneeled down and hit his head against the dresser over and over again. Yuna laughed and said she'd get it. Yuna opened the door and peeked out.

"Yes?" She asked Squall who was in the hallway. Squall scratched the back of his head.

"Whatever?" He asked.

Tidus showed up next to Yuna. "What do you want Squall?" Tidus asked. Squall pointed to Cloud's room. "Oh God," Tidus added and shook his head.

"You should go and help out," Yuna said to Tidus.

"Why...why me?" Tidus whined and followed Squall down the hall way. Rinoa's head popped out from her room and as she looked around she spotted Yuna about to close her door.

"Yunie! Wait!" Rinoa called. She was wearing a very long and large Led Zeppelin shirt and tip toed to Yuna.

"What's up Rinoa?" Yuna asked.

"Well, first of all, I need to borrow some make up remover, and second of all Squall had to go to Cloud's room because no one can get him to stop talking and they had Wakka clean up the 'throw up'-," Rinoa shook her head disgustedly, "And I'm bored," She finished looking up at Yuna.

"Ok, whatever, just don't get mad if I fall asleep," Yuna yawned and let Rinoa come in. Rinoa jumped on their bed and gave her a thanks. Yuna awhile later came out of her bathroom brushing her teeth wearing pink Juicy sweat pants with matching Juicy slippers and a spaghetti strap tank top reading "Simply Spoiled".

"Obsessed much on your Juicy attire?" Rinoa commented jokingly looking up from a magazine.

"Nice Led Zeppelin shirt that's _actually_ Squall's," Yuna replied back sarcastically and Rinoa pouted.

"This is a cool shirt!" She cried tugging on it. She bopped Yuna with a pillow.

"Don't bop me with a pillow!" Yuna cried and hit Rinoa's head back.

"Ugh! Me either!" Rinoa cried and jumping out of the bed she chucked a throw pillow at Yuna who ducked and threw one back at her. While they were pillow fighting Tidus opened the door and ducked just in time as Yuna had thrown a pillow at Rinoa who dodged it and it went at Tidus.

"Tidy! So sorry!" Yuna cried blowing a strand of hair from her face. Rinoa laughed.

"Sorry to break up your fun ladies, but uh Rinoa, Squall is calling for ya and uh...I guess his shirt?" Tidus asked. Rinoa giggled.

"Yeah, better not take it off here before-hand, right Tidus?" She asked slyly and gave him the pillow she had on her way out.

"Uh...I guess not," Tidus replied and closed the door after Rinoa left. Yuna threw a pillow at his head. "Hey!" He yelped.

"I 'guess' not?" Yuna quoted him and threw another pillow at him but he dodged it.

"Hey, lay off, she was the one that suggested it!" Tidus cried.

"She didn't suggest anything!" Yuna replied laughing and started to throw the pillows on the bed. "What happened to Cloud?" Yuna asked to change the subject and climbed into bed.

"Uh...yeah, no more weddings for 'Lil Cloud for a _long_ while," Tidus said and put on a Zanarkand Abes t-shirt on. (Hehe! Go team!)

He then was about to close the windows when Yuna protested. "Leave 'em open," She said and went back to typing something on a pink laptop.

"Fine, but don't blame me if some squirrel army comes in and eats our flesh off," Tidus mumbled and got in the bed. Yunastopped typingto give him a weird look, then shecontinued. "I thought you were tired, will ya quit writing?" Tidus asked turning off his side's lamp.

"Hold on, I'll be done real quick. Oh and you know if anyone took pictures at the wedding?" Yuna asked.

"Uh...I think Squall took a lot of em', I know I took some, and maybe Vincent? I don't know," Tidus replied and got in a sleeping position.

"I'll have to ask him," Yuna replied and turned off the laptop.

* * *

An hour later...

* * *

Tidus sat up. He thought he had heard something and looked around suspiciously. The windows were clattering, and a chilly wind was coming in to the room. Tidus sighed and got up from the bed, then walked over to the window rubbing his arms. 

"I _told_ Yuna the windows should be closed, she never listens," Tidus grumbled to himself. He closed the windows and turned around to go back to bed. But then the windows opened again. "Huh?" He turned around, and the windows were clattering again. "Weird...but ok. Just probably _really_ cheap windows," Tidus said to himself and closed the window again. He stared at it, and when it didn't open, he turned around and walked back to bed.

Then the windows opened _again_ and Tidus clenched his fist in frustration. He walked over to the window and looked out of it. There was a pale moon, and the sky wasn't as dark since it was getting close to morning. It was also very cold, so after not seeing anything, Tidus made to turn around. But then he saw it. It was a small dark thing that was moving closer and closer to the window!

"Oh no!" Tidus cried and closing the window hastily he ran and jumped across the bed. Yuna shifted and yawned. When she looked at the alarm clock and saw that it was earlier than noon she got mad.

"Tidus! Why did you wake me up?" Yuna mumbled angrily.

"I didn't, I woke up because of the window not closing and the wind, and when I looked outside there was something getting closer and closer! So I have to take drastic action!" Tidus informed her and reached under the bed. He pulled his sword out, with the duct tape still stuck to it, and held it up hero like.

Yuna squinted then lay her head back down sighing. "You've gotta be kidding me," She mumbled.

"Yuna! If that thing comes any closer, I'm killing it!" Tidus cried.

"Tidus, put the sword away, and go to sleep," Yuna ordered sleepily and covered her head with the covers.

"Fine...but I'm telling you Yuna-," Tidus started. Yuna groaned and lifting the covers away she clumsily opened the drawer on her night stand and rummaged around. She took out her hand gun and held it up for Tidus to see.

"If it comes near me I'll shoot it, so don't worry and go back to sleep," Yuna told him and she lay her head down again and hugged the gun to herself.

"Yeah well, that's fine and dandy for you, but what about me? I'm a sword kind of guy Yuna, so you can shoot all you want but I'm slicing," Tidus told her proudly. Yuna mumbled something and went back to sleep. Tidus hugged his sword also and looked at the window before settling down again. But then the window started to rattle and shake and Tidus whimpered. Yuna grinded her teeth together angrily.

"That's it!" She cried and jumped out of bed with her gun and made her way over to the window.

"Yuna, no!" Tidus cried.

"Tidus, you're the most immature, scared, over reacting-," Yuna started as she opened the window. Yuna flung open the shutters and looked around sleepily. She rubbed her eyes and turned to Tidus. "See? There's nothing out there! Let me go to sleep and stop worrying-," Yuna started but then the thing suddenly flew at her face and she fell back.

"Yuna!" Tidus cried. He jumped up on top of the bed with his sword and looked at what it was...but–

Yuna had pulled it off, flinging it and got up. "What the?" Tidus asked. It was a plastic bag, and as the wind came in, it made the bag fly lightly under the bed.

"It...was...only...a...fucking...plastic..._bag_!" Yuna exploded.

"I didn't know!" Tidus cried helplessly. Yuna groaned and shut the windows. She put her gun back in the drawer and got in bed. Tidus sadly tapedhis sword back under the bed and while doing so looked under to see the bag. The plastic bag's evil red eyes stared back at him and Tidus rose back up quickly.

"Yuna-," Tidus started. Yuna covered her head with the covers to not hear him. "Never mind," Tidus added and moved to the middle as far from the edge as he could. But it didn't matter what they did, because the bag was already in its designated position and sending out the coordinates of its location...

* * *

Yuna opened her eyes and found to her dismay that it was one in the afternoon. As she was going to fall back asleep, a loud voice following a heavy knock on the door made her whine and slam her head against her pillow. 

"Hey, no need to knock, I'm your friend enough, what was I thinking?" Cloud said slamming the door open. Rinoa came in after him wearing a blue bikini with a denim skirt and a sun hat, holding a large pool bag.

"Yunie! You're still asleep? We're going to the pool!" Rinoa exclaimed.

"Had a party _after _the party all night?" Cloud snickered.

"Shut up Cloud," Yuna grumbled muffled from having her face in her pillow and blindly swung a pillow at the direction of where Cloud's voice came from. She heard an "Ow!" and Cloud rubbed his head.

"What's going on?" Tidus asked sleepily.

"We're going to the pool, right now. Better hurry! I'll stand here all day if you don't. Just talking, and talking and talk-," Cloud started and Tidus and Yuna both cried out "OK!" in unison angrily for him to stop. Yuna sat up rubbing her eyes and walked to the bathroom.

"Haha, bed hair!" Cloud leered and Yuna punched him on the shoulder. After she went in the bathroom Cloud sat on their bed and poked Tidus with an umbrella.

"Go away Cloud," Tidus grumbled.

"Cloud leave them alone," Rinoa sighed and re settled her sunglasses.

"No! What were you guys doing last night that kept you awake the whole time?" Cloud asked smirking.

"This!" Tidus suddenly cried remembering and dove under the bed to look for the plastic bag. But...it was gone.

"Um...you played hide and go seek?" Cloud asked shrugging.

"No, no. There was this bag and-and it came at Yuna because it kept opening the windows-," Tidus tried explaining as he came back up. Cloud looked at Rinoa who looked at him back then they both turned to Tidus.

"Uh...maybe I wasn't the only one knocked out cold enough...," Cloud said.

"Yeah, what _did_ happen to you? You were freakin' bonkers after the party and then now in the morning you're all fine and dandy?" Tidus questioned.

"Well, it kinda _is_ the middle of the day, I'm usually back to normal about now...hang over is gone...so we're all going to the pool!" Cloud cried excitedly. Yuna came out in a pink bikini with her hair brushed and neat with her sunglasses perched on top of her head.

"Maybe some sun and a nice tan can get me fully awake," Yuna yawned.

"That's the spirit Yunie!" Rinoa replied cheerfully. After everyone else was ready and informed that they were going to the aquatic enrichment tank (Uh...pool). They headed out into the sunny day towards the hotel's pool.

* * *

Yuna, Rinoa, Tifa, and Aeris got four pool chairs out and lay on them facing the sun to get a tan. 

"Kowabunga!" Cloud yelled and did a cannon ball into the pool the minute he got there, splashing almost everyone. The girls had all taken out umbrellas simultaneously that matched their bikini color, and didn't get the water on them.

"You girls arejust gonnaspend the whole time tanning?" Cloud asked them coming up from under water.

"Maybe," Yuna replied sticking her tongue out at him. Squall then jumped in and Tidus after that. Quistis and Auron were at their honeymoon obviously, and as for Vincent and Sephiroth...I wasn't sure where they were. Oh yeah...I forgot Wakka and Zell. No offence, but I always forget them. Wakka was nowhere to be seen and Zell was jumping in after all the guys. After the guys had some swimming competitions, they got impatient and begged the girls to come in.

"Maybe we _should_ go in," Rinoa said to Yuna.

"Fine...do I look like I just got back from Cabo?" Yuna asked Rinoa standing up and twirling.

"You _alway_s look like you just got back from Cabo," Rinoa replied rolling her eyes.

"And a salon. You're not even wearing any make up and you look fine," Tifa grumbled. Yuna stuck her tongue out at Tifa.

"You need to lighten up Tifa. You're like, jealous of everyone," Yuna replied. Tifa didn't reply but just glared at her. Yuna put away her sunglasses in her pink pool bag and gingerly walked over to the pool steps. Rinoa did the same and followed Yuna.

"Ah, it's too cold!" Yuna whined putting a toe in.

"Babes, just dive in head first," Tidus told her.

"I don't wanna," Yuna replied.

"It'll mess up her hair, won't it Yuna?" Cloud sneered and spit water at her.

"Ew, and_ no_ that's not it! I'm going in, aren't I Cloud?" Yuna snapped and kicked water at him.

"Hey! Everyone out and try to push Yuna in the pool!" Cloud shouted and climbed out of the pool.

"Ah! No!" Yuna screamed. Rinoa laughed but Cloud pushed her in first. Rinoa came back to surface.

"_Cloud_!" She screamed angrily. Cloud laughed triumphantly. Zell blocked Yuna and she ran the other way into Squall.

"No! I surrender!" Yuna cried out laughing as Tidus came out of nowhere and started tickling her. They picked Yuna by herhands and feet and swung her in. Everyone laughed until Yuna came back up to surface. "Now that I'm wet, you guys are _so_ dead!" She cried. All the guys looked scared for a second until Cloud pushed his way past everyone.

"Wait, wait, wait! Let's settle this with a classic game of...Chocobo!" Cloud cried. Some cheered while some groaned. "Everyone has to play, c'mon Aeris and Tifa!" Cloud cried as everyone got back in the pool.

"Fine! Geez," Tifa grumbled and got in. After everyone was in the poolthey made their teams.

"Ok, Tidus will go with Yuna obviously then Squall with Rinoa, then it comes to who will go with _me_," Cloud said rubbing his chin.

"Oh wow, like_ that_ would be surprising as to who you choose," Tifa grumbled but nobody heard her because Cloud then shouted, "Aeris can be with me!"

Yuna had already assembled herself on Tidus's shoulders. "Let's play already!" She cried.

"Fine, Zell, will ya be my partner?" Tifa asked Zell who shrugged. Zell went under water for Tifa to get on his shoulders but he had trouble getting back up.

"God Tifa, how much do you freakin' _weigh_?" Zell blurted out accidentally when he could breathe again.

"Zell!" Tifa cried turning red. Yuna and Rinoa snorted.

"It's her boobs that's causing all the trouble," Cloud explained, and got a wave of water splashed at him by Tifa.

"This is going to be a piece of Mako cake! With Yuna weighing like sixty pounds and my super fast underwater skills, we are going to _rule_!" Tidus cried out triumphantly.

"Think again Tidus, I put water proof hair spray on my hair this morning, so nothing will hold me back!" Cloud cried back. Squall...didn't say anything. Wakka stood on the diving board and did a silent countdown. Rinoa and Yuna turned on Tifa together and she fell first.

"Not fair! Zell you stink!" Tifa cried angrily. Yuna and Rinoa high fived.

"Aeris, you're supposed to try and push them off!" Cloud grumbled to Aeris.

"Oh...oops," Aeris replied. She tried to push Rinoa who, almost fell but Squall sank down, saving Rinoa from falling. Unfortunately, this was just what Tidus wanted, because he was already waiting underwater with his leg stuck out and tripped Squall who lost his balance and fell, complete with Rinoa and all.

"This is _so_ not fair, Tidus is cheating!" Rinoa whined.

"Don't get jealous because I'm so cool," Tidus replied running a hand through his hair.

"Aeris versus Yuna...go!" Wakka called out. Tidus and Cloud circled each other.

"You're going down Strife, you know you can't beat me," Tidus said to Cloud with a smirk.

"Just because you're fast doesn't mean you're strong, Tidus. I can fucking launch Aeris at Yuna and we'll win," Cloud replied.

"Am I really that light?" Aeris interrupted.

"Yes, watch," Cloud replied and tossed Aeris into the air. Aeris screamed and Tidus tried to dodge Aeris from falling on him and Yuna. Aeris came down and tried to at least push Yuna as she fell, but instead ended up accidentally gripping her bikini strap and pulling it loose. Yuna yelped and fell with Aeris. While all this was going on, Yuna's top lazily floated up to the surface.

"Ah! My top!" Yuna shrieked, only her head visible above water.

"I'll get it!" Cloud and Tidus cried at the same time and lunged for it. Cloud jumped on Tidus, holding him back and reached for the top but Tidus pushed him off of him, then the two started to fight and argue.

"Cloud let me get the fucking top!" Tidus cried.

"No, it was my fault, I should get it!" Cloud replied. They pushed and grabbed at each other instead, while Vincent strolled along the edge of the pool, wearing black board shorts, and holding up a black umbrella. He got the pool cleaner and scooped the top up. Tidus dove underwater and swam as fast as a fish to escape Cloud, and got out of the pool.

"Tidy my top!" Yuna cried to him and pointed at Vincent who was standing there holding the pool cleaner with Yuna's top inside it, shifting his eyes.

"Valentine, what do you think you're doing?" Tidus cried going up to Vincent.

"I-uh-," Vincent started but Tidus grabbed the top from the pool cleaner, cutting him off saying "Gimme that!"

Rinoa helped Yuna out of the pool while holding a towel up so no one could see her. "We stopped the game right? It's really stupid and I don't want to play it anymore," Tifa complained.

"Fine, we'll only have one top get released today," Cloud replied getting out of the pool and shaking his hair free from water like a dog.

"Here you go Yuna, I got it!" Tidus cried running a little too eagerly towards Yuna with the top in his hand.

"I agree, let's leave the pool," Aeris said and walked over to Yuna, apologizing.

"It's ok, it happens all the time," Yuna replied cheerfully. Cloud raised an eyebrow interested.

"_That's_ why you like playing Blitzball," Cloud said to Tidus pointing at him.

"Shut up Cloud," Tidus replied nervously.

"I don't want to go back to the hotel and get dressed to do nothing, it's still the middle of the day," Yuna grumbled, now free to be viewed with her top now on.

"Don't they have a beach here or something?" Wakka asked.

"I don't know...do they?" Tifa asked.

"Let's just make them have one," Cloud replied, so they re packed to go to the beach instead and left. Almost like magic, a few yards away there was a beach complete with clear blue waves and even some volley ball nets set up.

"Like oh my God, Tidy, volley ball!" Yuna exclaimed.

"All right!" Tidus cried punching the air.

"Ah, volley ball. The second sport I love to watch chicks play," Cloud said rubbing his palms together.

"What's the first?" Rinoa asked but Cloud didn't answer her.

"Hey look! It's Yuna!" They heard someone squeal and two fourteen year old girls ran up to Yuna handing her autograph books.

"Oh, like I love my fans!" Yuna replied and signed them.

"I remember when I had fans," Rinoa sighed while Tifa agreed nodding.

"I remember when I had fans too," Tidus said scratching the back of his head.

"Can you sign your CD for me Yuna?" One of the girls asked and shoved a CD at Yuna.

"Tidy, don't worry, somewhere there's a kid who still plays Final Fantasy X," Yuna told him cheerfully and waved to the girls as they ran away. Tidus hung his head. Zell ran to them holding a volley ball.

"Look what I beat out of some kid!" He exclaimed and everyone cheered.

* * *

Cloud, Aeris, Squall, Rinoa, and Tifa were on one team. Tidus, Yuna, Vincent, Sephiroth, and Wakka were on the other.

"Do I _have _to play this?" Sephiroth asked.

"C'mon, it'll be fun," Yuna squealed.

"We set Babes, as always?" Tidus asked Yuna who nodded. Then Tidus looked at Wakka, Vincent, and Sephiroth. "You three...stand in the back somewhere," He said.

Cloud called the serve and Tifa passed it to Rinoa who tried to set it over but it fell in the net. The little Final Fantasy victory dance/song went to Tidus's team. (Calling it Tidus's team, I have no idea why).

"I shall serve now!" Yuna exclaimed and ran to the back. She did a perfect arch over the net and it landed right next to Cloud who was staring behind him at some girls.

"Cloud!" Everyone on his team cried.

"Oh! Uh, sorry, geez," Cloud said and picked up the ball. He threw it to Tidus who wanted to serve next.

"C'mon Tidy, serve it!" Yuna cheered. Instead of the basic serve, Tidus threw the ball up, kicked it up farther, and head butted it to the other side. Squall took his blade out and whacked it back, landing two inches away from Sephiroth.

"Woohoo!" Cloud cried and his team got the victory song.

"Sephiroth! It was right _there_!" Yuna wailed.

"An awesome serve for nothing!" Tidus cried.

"I quit," Sephiroth replied simply and walked away. Zell just walked in and took his place. Aeris served it to Cloud, who set it twice over the net. Yuna set it and bumped it to Tidus who spiked it, winning another point. Cloud kicked at the sand and watched as Yuna and Tidus jumped and cheered.

Tidus served it to go over the net, but it would have run into the net if Yuna hadn't jumped out of nowhere and dove for it, bumping it on the last minute. Tidus was already thinking ahead and spiked it as it flew up. They won another point. Yuna scrambled up from the ground and gave Tidus a high five.

"Can I serve next?" Zell asked meekly punching his fists together.

"No," Tidus and Yuna replied in unison flatly. Yuna went to the back and served. Rinoa bumped it to Squall who set it to Aeris who spiked it over, but! Tidus dove for it, bumping it high enough for Yuna to spike it again and win another point for them. As once again Yuna and Tidus jumped around and cheered Cloud lost his patience.

"This isn't fair!" He whined.

"How come?" Yuna protested.

"Because, it's-just, well...I-um, it's just not!" Cloud sputtered.

"You stink and we rule!" Tidus singsonged, pointing at Cloud.

"Can I switch to Yuna's team?" Rinoa asked Cloud.

"No! They're cheaters!" Cloud cried.

"How?" Yuna asked walking up to him.

"Because, your fucking _kids _will be born spinning a ball on their hand! You guys are too good and it's no fair!" Cloud grumbled stomping his foot like a five year old.

"Kids? What kids?" Tidus asked but Yuna punched him on the shoulder and faced Cloud.

"Look, what do you say we do then?" She asked.

"I don't know, let Wakka, Vincent, and Zell play maybe?" Cloud proposed pointing at them. Zell jumped up and down eagerly, Wakka picked a fly from his hair, sniffed it, then ate it, and Vincent looked down at his feet miserably.

"Not the star team but it's still fair," Cloud said. Yuna shrugged.

"Babes! You're going to give in?" Tidus pleaded.

"C'mon Tidy, we're still playing, just...let them serve for awhile," Yuna said and patted him on the shoulder.

"You're a sore loser Cloud, that's all there is to it," Tidus said pointing at Cloud and walking back. Cloud snickered and walked to his own side too. Yuna handed the ball to Vincent, winking at him.

"C'mon, you can do it, I know you can," Yuna smiled at him and walked to her position. Vincent rolled the ball in his hands and tossed it up once or twice to get the feel of it.

"Make it today Valentine!" Cloud shouted from the other side. Vincent made sure to glare at him first, then he hit the ball as hard as he could. It exploded. The patched remains of it rained around Vincent as everyone groaned.

"Nice going Valentine!" Tidus jeered while Cloud clenched his fists angrily.

"I'm-I'm sorry, geez," Vincent muttered.

"Hey c'mon guys, I'll just get another ball," Yuna said and took off. Awhile later she came back tossing what looked like a brand new ball up on the air as she walked.

"Did ya buy that Babes?" Tidus asked.

"No," Yuna replied.

"She probably got it off some guy for a lap dance, right Yuna?" Cloud sneered.

"Maybe," Yuna replied to him haughtily sticking her tongue out, then smirking at Vincent. "Wanna try again?" She asked sweetly, spinning the ball on one finger.

"Why not?" He replied and she tossed it to him. Everyone settled back into their positions and Vincent served again. This time it made a loud _pow_ and landed really hard on the other side. Rinoa screamed and dodged it.

"Rinoa! You're supposed to _hit_ it, not be afraid of it! Geez, women...," Cloud grumbled.

"It came by way too fast!" Rinoa protested glaring at him. Yuna clapped her hands and jumped up in victory.

"Yay Vincent!" She cheered.

"Let's just see if he can do it again," Tidus muttered and tossed it to Vincent. Vincent, with now a half smile on his face, prepared the toss and served. It struck down on the other side so hard, sand flew. Yuna cheered for him again as they won another point.

"Vincent, _for your information, _you're supposed to serve it to the other side, not try to _kill_ the players!" Cloud cried angrily.

"Yeah, let's try some strategy now, eh?" Tidus agreed running to the serving position with the ball.

"Vincent, you can come up here and set with me while Tidus serves," Yuna said pointing at the spot parallel to hers on the court. Vincent shrugged and walked over there as Tidus dropped his jaw.

"Babes! You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah Tidus it's fine, just serve," Yuna replied.

"But we always set together," Tidus grumbled under his breath as he served the ball to Yuna who bumped it to Vincent who actually tried spiking it and made it. Cloud dove for it and bumped it up. Squall took a batting like position as if playing Baseball and once again whacked it with his blade. Tidus caught it on his head, butting it to Yuna who set and spiked it to the other side. Tifa caught it, bumping to no one in particular but Rinoa called for it and set it on the other side. Vincent bumped it up quickly as the ball came for him and Yuna ran up and set it over.

Cloud, intent on getting this rally over, bumped it and spiked. The ball came towards Wakka who didn't see it and got smacked on the face, falling backwards. Cloud cheered and wiped his forehead as his team got a point.

"Let's say we stop playing, ya?" Wakka asked dizzily as blue birds circled his head. (Yes. They were blue. I know).

"Ok, I'm beat anyway," Yuna sighed. They all agreed and started to walk away.

"Oh, what? Right when _I _spike a good hit, we all decide to go home?" Cloud cried. As they were walking a flyer suddenly flew against Zell's face and he pulled it off.

"Hey, guys, look!" Zell announced and everyone huddled around him reading the flyer.

"A fair coming to town!" Rinoa cried happily.

"It's at night, we could all go, it's right in town and everything," Tifa read.

"Well, we really _don't_ have anything else to do anymore...I say we go," Tidus said and everyone agreed.

Like, oh my gosh, a fair. Will they go? (Duh) Will they come upon more adventures there? Will perhaps any of the rides they go on get stuck? (Foreshadowing rocks) Am I really running out of questions? (Little voice: Yes.) Shut up! Anyway, stay tuned, for chapter 7!


	7. Chapter 7: The Fair Comes To Town

Chapter 7: The Fair Comes To Town

The gang arrived at the pretty lighted fair.

"Like, it's so pretty and colorful! I love fairs!" Rinoa exclaimed clasping her hands together.

"Whose gonna eat hot dogs at the fair? _Zell's_ gonna eat hot dogs at the fair, yeah, that's right...," Zell said to himself. Everyone looked at him oddly and then started to walk to the entrance.

"I can't wait to get my hands on some cotton candy, but not the pink kind! I'm cool, so I eat the blue kind," Tidus said matter of factly.

"Ooh Tidus! You're such a rebel!" Cloud squealed in a fan girl voice.

"You...do that_ way_ too well...," Wakka said to Cloud suspiciously. Cloud shifted his eyes. When they got inside Rinoa ran to a stand and started jumping up and down.

"Oh, look! A pink unicorn! _I wanna have it_! Squall! _Squall_! Win it for me, _please_? Pretty, _please_?" Rinoa pleaded, spazzing out. Squall shook his head and walked over to the stand.

"That'll be three Gil, Pretty Boy," The buck toothed guy at the stand said with his hand out. Squall reached in his pocket and paid for a round. He had to pop all the balloons to win.

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! _Hurry and get it already_!" Rinoa cried shaking Squall's shoulders. Squall tried to concentrate and aimed the dart. He got three balloons, and had two more to go. When he missed and only had one dart left, he made sure no one was looking and whacked the Guy At Stand with his blade, knocking him unconscious. Then he popped the balloon with his blade and made sure to get the pink unicorn.

"Um...ok. Yay anyway!" Rinoa cheered and hugged the stuffed animal.

"Tidus, get me a prize. Now." Yuna pointed at a stand and Tidus marched there obediently. Tidus went to a stand where you had to throw a base ball and knock down all the cans. He lost the first time, and kept losing over and over again. Everyone left and went on rides, and after like an hour they came back to Tidus.

"Did ya get it yet?" Yuna asked eating a corn dog.

"No," Tidus muttered angrily and slammed down more Gil on the stand.

* * *

2 hours later...

* * *

"Um, Sir, are you ok?" The lady working at the stand asked Tidus. He was shaking all over with madness and slamming more and more Gil on the stand even though he hadn't finished th previous round yet. 

"Must...get...stuffed...animal," He sputtered. The lady was scared now and looked around for help. When Tidus knocked three cans down at the same time, he cackled maniacally and started to throw the Gil instead at the cans.

"Take this! And this!" He cried hysterically chucking the money at the cans, the lady, and other unfortunate bystanders.

"Sir! _You have to calm down_!" The lady cried helplessly. The others were nearby watching a magic trick stand, and Vincent and Yuna were talking to each other and joking around modestly.

"I...think Tidus is having some trouble getting you that prize you wanted," Vincent said, suddenly looking over at the commotion.

"Oh...he's always over reacting!" Yuna grumbled rubbing her forehead. "I'll go get him."

Yuna handed Vincent her cotton candy to hold and turned around to walk over to Tidus. She pushed her way through the crowd and to the front of the stand. "Tidus!" Yuna scolded.

"You...you _know_ him?" The poor lady at the stand asked shrilly as she used the stand's sign to block the Gil and base balls being bombarded at her by Tidus.

"Yes...he's uh, my...boyfriend," Yuna replied shifting her eyes.

Some of the people around her actually gasped, and the lady at the stand shouted out, "Good Lord!"

Yuna turned red and grabbed a chunk of Tidus's hair, pulling him down. "Ow!" He yelped falling down. Yuna dragged him to where everyone else was, and away from that particular stand. "Yuna! Let go!" Tidus whined. Yuna let go and as Tidus scrambled up she tapped her foot and glared at him.

"What the hell was _that_ about?" Yuna demanded.

"I was doing what you told me to do! Is that so much? That I would spend hours trying to get you a stupid prize?" Tidus cried.

"It's not that! It's just that you take things too seriously and over react all the time! I mean, if you lost all your money and didn't get the prize after _hours_, a normal person would have stopped trying by then!" Yuna snapped.

"I didn't want you mad at me!" Tidus cried back.

"I wouldn't really care...all _that_ much!" Yuna protested and crossed her arms turning her back to him. Tidus threw his arms up and rolled his eyes.

"Oh, c'mon guys! How about we go on a group ride, eh?" Rinoa asked putting her arms around Tidus and Yuna's shoulders.

"Fine," Yuna and Tidus grumbled in unison.

Rinoa clapped her hands and beamed. She hummed and joined Tidus and Yuna's hands together and pushed them along to walk. "Now don't let go!" Rinoa ordered and whistled to everyone else. "C'mon, let's go back to the rides and find something we can all go on," Rinoa said.

"Finally. That magic stand was so boring," Tifa grumbled. Aeris nodded writing on her notebook.

"I don't want to_ go _on any more rides, I don't want to _continue _walking through this wretched place, and I want to go _home_," Sephiroth snarled.

"All you _do_ is complain Sephiroth! Here, have some candy and lighten up!" Cloud cried and thrust a candy bar at Sephiroth.

"...Candy?" Sephiroth repeated, as if foreign to it.

"Yeah..._candy_. It's magical!" Cloud said in a magical voice sarcastically.

"_Do you honestly think that a mere sugared product is going to solve all my temper problems_?" Sephiroth boomed while eating a big chunk of it and chewing noisily. Vincent laughed and Sephiroth turned on him, silencing him.

"Fine, I can't _laugh_ anymore," Vincent muttered miserably.

"I mean,_ candy _is just there to waste your money! And your teeth! Who, in their right _mind_, would look to _candy_ for comfort?" Sephiroth continued as he went to a candy stand and bought more. Cloud got kinda scared, and inched away from Sephiroth.

"I don't want to hold hands with you, I'm mad at you," Yuna said to Tidus.

"I'm mad at you_ too_," Tidus replied.

"Good, cause I'm mad at _you_. Just because I'm getting on this ride with you, doesn't mean _anything_. I'm still mad at you," Yuna said as she and Tidus got in a cart in the Ferris Wheel.

"Fine," Tidus replied.

"Fine," Yuna replied back. Rinoa and Squall got in the same cart as them.

"Are we speaking to each other again? How nice...," Rinoa beamed at Yuna and Tidus as if they were five years old. Tidus and Yuna turned their heads away from each other. "Oh Squall, don't you hate it when our friends fight?" Rinoa pouted. Squall didn't say anything.

Cloud was getting in the same cart Zell and Wakka had gone in, while leading Aeris inside. Tifa came out of nowhere and tripped him.

"Ah!" Cloud cried and fell on his face.

"Cloud?" Aeris called worriedly.

"Oops! My bad! Hurry up and go in Cloud, you don't wanna get stuck outside!" Tifa said hurriedly and pushed him inside as he tried to get up.

"But-," Aeris started but Tifa ran inside after Cloud was in and shut the cart door on Aeris's face.

"Only four per cart m'am," The Ferris Wheel dude said halting Aeris.

"But that leaves me with-," Aeris said turning around to face Vincent and...Sephiroth. Vincent shifted his eyes.

"I need to go use the facilities," Vincent said hastily and swooped away. Aeris gave Sephiroth a very frightened look, like when you're driving and you are about to run over a deer and the head lights go in the deer's eyes and it knows what's coming and it is truly frightened. Yeah, that look.

"Well? Are you going to go _in_?" Sephiroth snarled.

"I-I guess," Aeris muttered and shakily walked in, sitting at the very corner, trying to make herself as small as possible. Sephiroth muttered some things under his breath and walked in, slamming the cart door shut. When it locked Aeris whimpered. Sephiroth started to happily eat more candy and munched on it loudly.

"Hmm...candy," Sephiroth murmured. Aeris was trembling and hugged her knees. She tried to focus out the window, but Sephiroth kept eating that candy so damn _loud_...

"Want some?" Sephiroth asked with his mouth full and extended his arm with a candy bar in it. Aeris slowly shook her head, and turned her gaze back out the window.

* * *

Meanwhile.

* * *

"No!" Cloud was wailing on his knees in the other cart.

"Cloud, get a grip," Tifa snapped.

"Aeris...inside the same cart...as Sephiroth..._She's doomed_!" Cloud cried, banging his head against the door and staying that way.

"Whoop-dee-doo," Tifa replied in a bored voice.

"_You_! You_ planned_ this didn't you!" Cloud cried pointing at Tifa.

"Did not!" Tifa snapped.

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"_Yes you did_!" Cloud cried. Tifa crossed her arms and turned her head away from him. "Good thing I'm always prepared," Cloud suddenly added and everyone turned to him. He was rummaging through his pocket and took out a mini microphone.

"What the hell is that?" Tifa demanded. Cloud didn't answer her and pressed the little red button.

"Hello? Hello?" He said into it.

* * *

Meanwhile, in Sephiroth's cart.

* * *

"Ah!" Sephiroth suddenly cried out plugging one ear. Aeris had jumped at his yell and almost had a heart attack.

"Hello?" Came Cloud's voice into Sephiroth's ear.

"Strife! What the hell is this?" Sephiroth cried. Aeris was on the verge of crying. She was stuck inside the same cart as a delusional killer...

"Is that..._Sephiroth_ on the other line?" Tifa demanded going up to Cloud. Cloud shushed her and sat in the corner to hear better.

"Sephy, what are you doing right now?" Cloud asked.

"Pfft, like he'd tell you!" Tifa replied. Cloud shushed her again and she rolled her eyes.

"Not eating candy if that's what you mean," Sephiroth replied hurriedly.

"No, no! Where's _Aeris_?" Cloud asked.

"Oh, she's uh...just, sitting there...," Sephiroth said lowly.

"Oh, good," Cloud replied wiping his forehead.

"Want me to kill her for you?" Sephiroth asked eagerly. Aeris let out a weird noise.

"_No_! That's what I_ don't_ want you to do!" Cloud cried.

"Oh...," Sephiroth replied sadly. "Wait, Strife, how the heck did you get a microphone in my ear?" Sephiroth asked.

"Um...a long time ago...me and Vincent were bored...," Cloud replied shifting his eyes. Sephiroth growled. "So uh...are you just going to sit there with her?" Cloud asked to change the subject.

"I guess...what do you want me to do?" Sephiroth hissed.

"Talk to her, because, well...CPR doesn't work on people who've fainted," Cloud joked and snorted. Tifa sweat dropped and growled. Wakka and Zell looked at each other and shrugged.

"You disgust me to the fullest extent Strife," Sephiroth replied grimly.

"Why does everyone say that to me?" Cloud wondered out loud. But suddenly there was a jerk and the ride was over. "Anyway, the ride is over so I better find her without a scratch!" Cloud warned.

"Wait, the ride isn't over," Sephiroth replied.

"No time for jokes Sephiroth! C'mon, just let her go!" Cloud cried.

"No, seriously, I_ mean_ the ride isn't over! I'm still in the cart suspended in midair!" Sephiroth replied looking out the cart window.

"What the?" Cloud wondered and looked up. Everyone had exited their carts on the Ferris Wheel except for one that was stuck on the very top, which so happened to have Sephiroth's face pressed up against the glass to glare at Cloud. "Oh no! You're stuck!" Cloud cried.

"_What_?" Sephiroth erupted with his fist shaking.

"Aeris is stuck in the cart with Sephiroth? Ha! Priceless...," Tifa cried out in joy, and maybe even triumph.

Suddenly Cloud's bottom lip trembled and he started to wail. He flung his arms around Tifa and sobbed dramatically on her shoulder. "Aeris is going to die!" He wailed. Tifa grimaced and patted his back without much enthusiasm.

"Don't worry Strife, I'm not going to freakin' eat her," Sephiroth replied through the microphone.

"What?" Cloud asked pushing himself away from Tifa.

"I won't kill her! Geez," Sephiroth replied slapping his forehead. Aeris was plugging her ears and humming to herself while rocking back and forth.

"You won't? Oh, Sephiroth, I love you! Even though I'd never thought I'd ever say those words in like a billion years, I still wanna say them and say them again! I love you!" Cloud cried. Some people passing by stared at Cloud. There was a very long silence at the other end of the microphone line.

"Just for saying that...I _will_ kill her," Sephiroth finally muttered.

"_No_! _What have I done_?" Cloud cried out in anguish.

"Hey Mommy! Look at that guy! He has a big head and is screaming for no apparent reason!" A little girl walking by with her mom said and pointed at Cloud.

"No Sweetie, no pointing at crazy people and don't stare!" Her mom said and pushed her daughter along away from Cloud. Sephiroth laughed evilly on the other end.

"Ok, fine, fine! I take it back! I don't love you, I hate you! I hate you, you selfish bastard! Oh, I hate you! _Please don't kill her_!" Cloud cried hastily.

"Hmm...," Sephiroth replied, thinking about it. "Fine. Just if you ever..._ever_...say that you love me again-,"

"I understand! Now, is she...still alive?" Cloud asked shrilly.

"Yeah, yeah," Sephiroth mumbled flicking some lint of his sleeve.

"Wait... I have a good idea," Cloud replied.

"And what would_ that_ be?" Sephiroth snarled.

"I mean...Aeris is sweet and everything...but I don't think I want her as a girlfriend," Cloud started as he walked.

"...Yes...And...?" Sephiroth asked.

"I mean, we had a fling or two in the past, nothing too big. I mean, with my work, and all that I don't have much _time_...," Cloud continued.

"And?" Sephiroth asked again.

"She's really a nice girl and all, but she's not really my _type_ really, I mean all she wants to do is write and read, and write some more and-," Cloud continued but Sephiroth cut him off.

"_Ok I get it, you don't want to fucking date her now what's your plan_?" Sephiroth boomed. (You know, you'd think Aeris was hearing all this but I don't think she is...)

"I mean, you're my friend...uh...sort of, and Aeris is definitely one of my good friends, but we always had a _difficulty_...if you've noticed...hanging out together in a group," Cloud said.

"Yes...I've noticed...," Sephiroth replied stroking his chin.

"I mean, ever since Final Fantasy VII kinda came out, and when we did the 'scene' she's been kinda..._traumatic_, I'd call it," Cloud continued.

"Yes...," Sephiroth agreed.

"So! I think this is a perfect opportunity, to solve _three_ problems, all at once!" Cloud said.

"Shoot," Sephiroth replied.

Yards away Vincent got a zombie like stare and raised his gun, shooting off into space. After a few seconds he shook his head and looked around confused. He shrugged and walked away.

"I think...you and Aeris...should get together," Cloud proposed. There was a longer silence on the other end. "Think about it! It would solve this 'hanging out' problem, now we can all be in the same room without the other having a heart attack at your presence! Also, it would solve that whole triangle thing I have with Aeris and Tifa, I mean both of them is too much on my plate and one of 'em has got to go, or both if you ask me, but since I can't get rid of Tifa even if I tried, Aeris could actually be a little easy. And_ then _maybe having a girlfriend for awhile can, you know...who knows? Lighten your temper a bit, ease your problems-," Cloud started but Sephiroth cut him off again.

"No," He simply replied. Except his voice was all weird and squeaky.

"Seph...you ok? Besides, what do you mean _no_? C'mon! How else are you going to move on and...I don't know...have a life? You need to start dating man!" Cloud replied. (Cloud...giving...Sephiroth...dating...advice. I never thought I'd see the day).

"I said no Strife! Damn, how do you turn this thing off?" Sephiroth cried poking inside his ear.

"It's no use...," Cloud replied and laughed evilly.

"_Listen you_!" Sephiroth cried. Then he lowered his voice in spite of Aeris. "...I will _not_ even _consider_ going to such limits as to actually 'dating' someone, much less take advice on it by _you_!" He snarled.

"C'mon...it'll be funny!" Cloud replied. Sephiroth growled. "Tell her that she looks nice in that dress," Cloud suddenly ordered taking Sephiroth aback.

"No!" Sephiroth sputtered.

"Do it!"

"Fine...I guess...," Sephiroth cleared his throat and turned to Aeris. She had fainted. (Aha! That was why she was...not...listening...)

"What the?" Sephiroth cried.

"What?" Cloud demanded.

"Wake up you! C'mon!" Sephiroth cried and shook her.

"Cloud, it's been over an hour, are you still talking to Sephiroth? Is...he still stuck in that cart with Aeris?" Tifa asked.

"What?" Rinoa asked shocked. Squall snorted. "Squally! This is serious!" Rinoa scolded.

* * *

Meanwhile...

* * *

"Rinoa is gone you know," Tidus suddenly said. 

"Huh?" Yuna asked and looked around. In fact, everyone was gone and they were still sitting at a bench holding hands. "Oh, finally!" Yuna hastily added and pulled her hand free from Tidus.

"Finally I say! I have to go," Tidus replied and ran to the bathroom. Yuna rolled her eyes and slumped against the bench. Suddenly a cotton candy wad that was half melted and melting still appeared in front of her face and she gave a little shriek.

"Oh! Didn't mean to scare you...I-I was uh...returning your, um, cotton candy...thing...," Vincent said coming out from behind her.

"Oh...Vincent. Oh, why, thanks...though I don't see why I would be needing it anymore," Yuna laughed and poked at the melting cotton candy. Vincent laughed nervously. "Hmm...there was something I needed to ask you...oh right!" Yuna said while spinning the cotton candy stick in her hands then throwing it backwards when she remembered what she wanted to ask.

Kenshin was peacefully strolling along when out of nowhere a cotton candy wad came at him and hit his head. "_Oro_? Ew...this is all sticky!" He cried.

"Um...Kenshin...that's melted cotton candy and it just got all over your hair...there's only one thing left to do!" A fan girl who was stalking him and then came out said.

"What's that?" Kenshin asked gulping.

"We're... going to have to cut off all your hair!" The fan girl cried taking out a giant pair of scissors.

Kenshin fell on his knees and wailed, "No!" but super long. (FanFiction won't let me type it uber long, of course.)

"What was that?" Yuna asked when she and Vincent heard the long "No."

"I have...no clue," Vincent replied shuddering.

"Anyway, I needed some pictures from the wedding. Do you have any?" Yuna asked.

"Oh...right. Actually, I so happen to have some," Vincent replied.

"Oh lemme see!" Yuna squealed.

"My apologies Lady Yuna, the camera is in my room back at the hotel," Vincent replied.

"Oh...ok. Tomorrow I'll come by and I can have it then!" Yuna suggested. Vincent's eyes widened all of a sudden.

"No, no...I'll come by _your_ room and give it to you," Vincent replied.

"Don't be silly! I can come by your room just as easily as you can come by mine," Yuna said.

"Really, that won't be necessary," Vincent replied.

"How about...whoever wakes up first?" Yuna challenged and laughed. Vincent shifted his eyes.

"_Really_, it won't be necessary-," He repeated. Yuna giggled and shook her head.

"Fine...we'll have it your way. But whether you like it or not, I'm getting those pictures and I _will_ see you! And eventually I'll find out what you're hiding too!" Yuna said.

Vincent raised an eyebrow. "Hiding? I'm not hiding anything," He replied shifting his eyes.

"Ah, but you must be," Yuna said coming closer and looking up at him. "Then why don't you want me to come in your room?"

Vincent didn't reply.

"Exactly," Yuna replied to his silence, and turning around she started to walk away.

"Wait!" He called. Yuna stopped and twirled around. "The fair...it's almost closing," Vincent said.

"Yeah? And?" Yuna replied.

"You...never got your stuffed animal prize," Vincent said back after awhile.

Yuna smiled.

* * *

"Huh?" Aeris said dizzily and looked up. She screamed as she saw Sephiroth's face above hers. 

"Did ya say you liked her dress yet?" Cloud asked Sephiroth through the microphone.

"No, Strife! _She's freakin' unconscious already_!" Sephiroth boomed. But then Sephiroth looked down and noticed Aeris who was shaking. "Oh, wait, she's awake," He said hurriedly then pulling on his collar he stuttered, "I...uh...like your dress."

Aeris raised an eye brow and looked puzzled.

"This isn't working!" Sephiroth hissed turning his back on Aeris.

"Give her some time...you know how confused she must be now?" Cloud asked.

"Fine...but I want you to leave," Sephiroth replied. Aeris couldn't be happier to leave. But she then realized with horror and panic that she was stuck in the Ferris Wheel and couldn't leave. "Fine. Bye." Sephiroth then turned around to face Aeris. Aeris watched his mouth twitch up many times, then slowly..._ slowly_ raise into a half, pathetic attempt at a smile.

"So...why did ya faint?" Sephiroth asked in this weird nice voice. Aeris looked around for her note book and hugged it close to her tightly. "Ok...well I guess you can write if you want," Sephiroth said scratching the back of his neck.

Cloud meanwhile, turned off the micro phone and just let Sephiroth handle things for himself. And if he messed up (like Cloud knew he would) he would always talk to Aeris or plan some other plan for them. Cloud went up to Rinoa and Squall who were sharing a sundae and sat with them. "Hey, you know where everyone went?" He asked absent mindedly. Rinoa shrugged.

"Nobody tells _me_ anything," Rinoa replied looking up at the sky, away from Cloud.

"Oh come on! I thought you _knew_ Aeris was in the same cart as Sephiroth," Cloud replied. Squall snorted again and Rinoa kicked him under the table.

"Fine...I guess. But actually, I don't know where everyone is. Zell and Wakka said something about causing havoc in the Kiddie Area, I left Tidus and Yuna alone at a bench an hour ago, and Tifa said she gave up hope on ever thinking you would be sane again," Rinoa explained.

"Oh, well then, thanks a lot Tifa," Cloud grumbled.

"She was just freaked out that you were talking to Sephiroth through a mini micro phone installed in Sephiroth's ear...but then again, who knows?" Rinoa replied shrugging and eating another cherry. After Squall and Rinoa were done eating they decided to round everyone up so they could go home.

They found Wakka and Zell running around popping all the balloons from the kids and laughing their heads off. Then they finally found Tidus wearing a Fair Worker uniform and actually acting like he worked there and instructing people the wrong way on how to put on their seat belts in the roller coaster.

"Where could Yuna and Vincent be?" Tifa asked looking around, after they found her miserably throwing pennies into a fountain by herself.

"Over there! I'll get her," Rinoa cried and as everyone else walked out of the exit Rinoa ran to where Vincent and Yuna were at a game stand, trying to shoot the most targets possible to win a prize.

"You've been lucky a few times Yuna, but I'm going to beat you now," Vincent declared aiming his gun as the Stand Guy was about to count down.

"Oh really? We'll see," Yuna challenged and laughed. The light turned green and they began to shoot. The bell rang and Yuna threw her hands up. "Yes! I win, I win!" Yuna cheered dancing around and boogie dancing.

"It's these...cheap guns!" Vincent sputtered shaking his fist. Yuna laughed and stuck her tongue out at him.

"You just can't accept the fact that I'm better than you!" Yuna replied jokingly.

"Here's another prize for you m'am," The stand guy said in a bored voice and handed Yuna another stuffed animal Moogle. Yuna thanked him and turned to a little kid. "Hey, you want this?" Yuna asked leaning down and handing it to him.

"Thanks lady!" The kid cried happily and ran with his new prize. Vincent smiled at her as she got back up.

"Another round?" Vincent proposed.

"Actually, Rinoa is coming for us. I think it's time to go," Yuna giggled.

"Alright. But let's get something straight that even though you won more then me, I still got you that prize you wanted in the first place," Vincent said walking with Yuna to where Rinoa was waiting for them.

"Yeah, I love it!" Yuna cried hugging the big, soft, purple bunny rabbit. (See Alyssa! The bunny _is _purple. Not brown!)

"Weird company name that makes these," Vincent noted, lightly pulling the tag. Yuna laughed.

"That's not the name of the company, it's the name of the rabbit. They each come with a name! This one for example is Foofy," Yuna read.

"Strange name all the same," Vincent chuckled.

"You guys walk too slow! Just watch and see if _I_ wait around any longer!" Rinoa cried and stormed off. Vincent and Yuna laughed and watched as some old guy pushed a button and all the lights in the Fair except for some lone street lights turned off.

"Thanks," Yuna said all of sudden.

"For the prize? Sure," Vincent replied.

"And...also for not calling me Lady Yuna that one time," Yuna giggled.

"Oh...," Vincent replied turning slightly red. "I just always thought to call you Lady Yuna...I don't know why. Did I really only call you Yuna?" Vincent asked.

"Yeah, back at the stand. But it's no big deal, I've always wondered why you always called me Lady Yuna," Yuna replied.

"Do you wish for me _not_ to call you Lady Yuna anymore, Lady Yuna?" Vincent asked jokingly. Yuna laughed.

"I don't _mind_...but it's kinda like that sort of thing where nobody calls me that anymore," Yuna replied smiling at him.

"That's why I'm unique," Vincent said. "But...I guess I won't call you that anymore," He added.

"Once again, I don't mind-," Yuna replied laughing.

"Fine, every other week day I call you Lady Yuna and the whole weekend I call you Yuna," Vincent suggested and Yuna laughed.

"Deal," She replied and they shook hands.

* * *

"Do you...wanna play cards or something?" Sephiroth asked Aeris. She slowly shook her head. Sephiroth sighed. "Look...I know that you're scared of me...but we're stuck in this damn cart together and you have to understand that I'm not going to kill you!" Sephiroth cried. Aeris stared at him. "I'm serious!" He added. 

Aeris looked down at her lap and sighed. "F-F-Fine. It's just that...I'm cold and hungry, and not to mention tired. I mean, when are they going to fix this thing? Plus I have to get home to type up all my studies, and I'm not even done making my business cards yet-," Aeris started.

"Business cards?" Sephiroth wondered.

"Yes...uh, I'm done with my project...that's why I have to type everything up. Plus, now I can officially start my sessions," Aeris replied.

"Who do you have to uh... 'therapize'," Sephiroth asked.

"Um...m-mostly you but you don't have to do-," Aeris started hastily.

"_I'll do it_!" Sephiroth cried before she finished, slamming the wall with his fist. Aeris squeaked. "Uh...sorry. But I will! I don't see how it works, but at this point I'm sick of everyone-well...in general I'm sick of everyone-but Cloud has told me a million times I should sign up for this shindig and he says you're pretty good at it," Sephiroth replied.

"Oh...that's really nice of him to say," Aeris said and shuffled through her notebook. "So you're sure? You want to try it? You _are_ my...um...main object of psychology in my studies," Aeris asked.

"Yes, and if I don't like it I could always leave," Sephiroth replied shrugging one shoulder. Aeris laughed nervously and handed him a pink business card. He pocketed it and there was a turn of wheel sound, and before they knew it they were back on ground.

"Sorry for the inconvenience-," A guy started as Sephiroth slammed the door opened and lead Aeris outside.

"Yeah, whatever pal," He snarled at the guy before he could finish. Aeris looked around at the empty fair.

"Oh dear," She said worriedly.

"Don't worry, we'll still get home," Sephiroth assured her and grabbing her arm he walked quickly out the exit.

"Sephiroth, slow down," Aeris said as she tried to keep up with him.

"I wanna get out of this horrid place as quickly as possible," Sephiroth hissed and practically sprinted into the parking lot.

Ah...isn't love sweet? And it seems to be in the air anyway. No wonder it smelled a little funky back there. Anyway, that was all for chapter um...7? Chapter 8 will come up with lot's of the usual surprises, funny things, and uh...funny things. Will Sephiroth really go to Aeris's therapy session and will he survive? Will Yuna really get those wedding pictures...or something else? (Bad question). Is Kenshin really _bald _now? Will the gang ever find out why there's a secret plastic bag under Tidus and Yuna's bed, and what it's there for? In time!


	8. Chapter 8: Sephiroth's Therapy Session

Chapter 8: Sephiroth's First Therapy Session

Just after breakfast, Rinoa saw Aeris walk into her room. "Aeris! Wait up!" Rinoa called and ran over to her.

"Oh, hello there Rinoa," Aeris greeted twirling a strand of hair around her fore finger.

"So-o-o," Rinoa singsonged, rocking back and forth on her heels and smirking oddly at Aeris.

Aeris looked around and shrugged. "So...what?" She asked.

"How did your date with Sephy go?" Rinoa asked excitedly.

"What? _Date_? What are you talking about?" Aeris asked hastily.

"You know...!" Rinoa replied lightly punching Aeris on the shoulder.

"No-o-o...I don't," Aeris replied brushing off her shoulder.

"Hmm...that's weird. Cloud like, told everyone you went out with him at the fair...you know, after you guys got stuck at the Ferris Wheel?" Rinoa explained. Aeris sighed and hit her head against the wall over and over. "What really happened then?" Rinoa demanded tapping her foot.

"The worst! Not only was getting stuck in that wheel a horribly traumatic experience, but we got locked inside the fair grounds and Sephiroth had to tear down a fence so we could leave. Then he just drove us to the hotel..it was so incredibly awkward," Aeris finished.

"Sounds like a date to me!" Rinoa piped up cheerfully.

"How...? _How _does it sound like a date?" Aeris asked desperately, fearing that Rinoa had gone mad.

"You guys were at a fair, _together_. You were in a ride, _together_. He did something illegal to save you from getting stuck in the fair _together_. He drove you and him back here with a _car_, TOGETHER," Rinoa counted off on her fingers.

"You know what, whatever. I have an office to make and organize in my room so I can start my sessions," Aeris replied and opened her door.

"Bye!" Rinoa waved and skipped to Yuna's room. She knocked and waited until someone opened the door.

"Who is it?" Came a sweet voice.

"Uh...Rinoa?" Rinoa replied.

"Oh," Yuna said back, sounding like herself but disappointed. Yuna opened the door and gave Rinoa a questioning look. "What do you want? You know I'm waiting for someone," Yuna said.

"Who would that be? With that sweet voice you were pulling off it's got to be a guy," Rinoa replied.

"Maybe," Yuna said shrugging. "It's business stuff. Nothing special."

"Really?" Rinoa replied not buying it. Yuna rolled her eyes and placed a hand on her hip.

"You going to say what you want now, or will you leave already?" Yuna asked.

"Oh, well, I actually just wanted to see what you were doing but now I have something else! I've got the story on what happened to Aeris and Seph-," Rinoa was saying when Yuna suddenly shrieked and pushed her down, slamming the door. Yuna ran around her room frantically and found her magazine. She jumped on the bed and tried to find a casual position, as if she wasn't expecting anyone to come by. She quickly opened the magazine and pretended she was reading.

Rinoa rubbed her arm and glared at Yuna's door.

"You alright?" Somebody asked next to Rinoa. Rinoa looked up to find Vincent standing next to her with a camera in his hand.

"Oh...I-um, I knew it...," Rinoa suddenly muttered tapping her chin. Vincent shifted his eyes and wondered if Rinoa hit her head. "Have fun with Yuna!" Rinoa said getting up and running off.

"Fun?" Vincent repeated and knocked on Yuna's door slowly.

"Come in," Yuna's voice came.

Vincent opened the door and found Yuna on her bed reading a magazine upside down while chewing gum. "Hey you!" Yuna greeted and flung the magazine aside. She stood up and smiled at him real big.

"I, uh...have the camera," Vincent said, trying not to sound nervous.

"Wonderful! Here, I'll turn on my lap top," Yuna said and walked over to her night stand. Vincent stood still and noticed a plastic bag under Yuna's bed.

"What is that plastic bag for?" Vincent asked Yuna as she came back holding the lap top.

"Oh...I think it's just something that flew in," Yuna replied laughing nervously and kicking it under the bed while smiling at Vincent.

"Here," Vincent said and handed Yuna the camera. She hooked it up and beamed at the lap top screen.

"Wow, these are great! Oh, I remember that," Yuna said and laughed as she looked at the pictures.

"I was bored that night," Vincent replied scratching the back of his head.

"No problem," Yuna giggled. "Hey...wanna go get a bite to eat?" Yuna asked closing the lap top.

"Um...sure," Vincent replied.

"Good. I woke up too late for breakfast and well, now that I have the pictures, I have nothing else to do," Yuna said getting up.

"Where's Tidus?" Vincent asked.

"Eh, I don't really care," Yuna replied brushing her hair in front of the mirror.

"Oh. Are you two still having an argument?" Vincent asked pocketing his camera.

"Yeah, except the arguing part is over. Now he's just ignoring me, so I'll ignore _him_," Yuna replied setting down the brush a little too hard.

Vincent sat on the bed and picked up Foofy. While playing with its ears, he asked, "Well, shouldn't you be trying to work it out? You and Tidus usually go haywire when you're not at least ten feet next to each other."

Yuna sighed and got a coat out of the closet. "That's exactly my point. He can't do _anything_ without me, and we always get the reputation of being the 'clingy' couple. Usually I'd definitely try and work it out and we'd be happy again in like, five minutes. But I think it's good to get some space and time, you know? I mean...," Yuna said and turned to face Vincent. "It's kind of a relief to not have him around for a little bit."

Vincent looked at Foofy and tossed him to Yuna who caught it smiling. "We can go out to eat, but as soon as we get back you should check up on him," Vincent replied getting up.

"I _always_ have to check up on him. I feel more like his babysitter than his girl friend," Yuna grumbled and lightly set Foofy against her bed pillow.

"Just saying. Too much space might not be as good as you thought, then you might have regretted-," Vincent started but Yuna silenced him by grabbing his arm.

"It's ok Vincent. I mean, Tidus is a grown man, he can fend for himself. At least, that's what I'm putting up to test. I'm going to spend all of today without even spying on him or anything, and if I see in the end that he can work out things for himself, then I'll see about working it out with him," Yuna said smirking. Vincent half smiled and handed Yuna her purse.

"That's a good plan. If you were Cloud, he'd probably would have only made that up to win a few bets," Vincent replied. Yuna laughed and they walked out of the room. They headed to the lobby and walked into Sephiroth. Vincent stopped and so did Sephiroth and they kinda stared at each other.

"Sephiroth," Vincent said.

"Valentine," Sephiroth replied.

"Where are you headed?" Vincent asked casually, brushing his sleeve off. Yuna looked puzzled and looked from Sephiroth back to Vincent.

"Aeris's room...," Sephiroth replied sort of in a low voice and through clenched teeth.

"You mean...your therapy session?" Vincent asked and couldn't help the grin spreading on his face.

"No. Aeris's _room_. Not her office, Valentine...," Sephiroth replied.

"Her room..._is_ her office," Yuna piped up. Sephiroth suddenly zeroed in on her and Yuna yelped, hiding behind Vincent.

"She's right, you know," Vincent said to Sephiroth grinning still.

"Oh yeah? And where are you two headed? I didn't know Yuna provided concerts in graveyards," Sephiroth sneered.

"Hey!" Yuna cried but Vincent was still grinning at Sephiroth.

"You know very well Lady Yuna and I are only going somewhere to socialize. While you're going to an actual therapy session with the girl you just went out with-," Vincent started but Sephiroth's fist shook at him and Vincent actually stopped and laughed.

"You went out with Aeris?" Yuna asked cocking her head.

"No I didn't!" Sephiroth barked.

"Denial is something you have to deal with in therapy you know," Vincent replied.

"That's it. I'm going. Enjoy your _socializing_ Valentine, because after _this_ one goes, you might not be so lucky next time," Sephiroth snarled and walked away. Vincent looked down in defeat.

"Ouch," Yuna commented and patted Vincent's arm. "You ok?" She asked.

"I'm fine," Vincent replied, "I just hope Aeris is a _good_ therapist."

"Aeris is my friend. If Sephiroth doesn't spill to you what happened during his session, Aeris will tell me. Then we can get him good," Yuna replied smiling. Vincent looked up and gave her a faint smile.

"Ok. Let's go then," Vincent said and they walked out of the hotel together.

--

"I'm bored," Cloud announced letting fall his Play Station controller.

"Ha! You stink at Final Fantasy X," Tidus said laughing at him.

Cloud clenched his fist. "Stupid Al Bhed," He muttered glaring at the TV screen.

"I wonder what Yuna is doing right now," Tidus said laying down on his back on Cloud's bed.

"Doing something fun without you, maybe? I don't know," Cloud replied and tried to look for another game to play.

"You can't spend your time away from her thinking about her man," Zell told Tidus. "You're in a fight, remember?"

"It's too ha-a-a-rd," Tidus whined. "I mean, one time, it was the best ever. We went to the movies and everything, and well, we didn't even _watch _it," Tidus told.

"Really?" Cloud asked coming back up interested.

"Yeah! We like, threw candy and chocolate at people's heads for _two hours_," Tidus finished and smiled, remembering. Cloud rolled his eyes.

"Tidus, you're so rated 'E'," Cloud said.

"No I'm not! You are," Tidus snapped.

"No!"

"Yeah!"

"Wait, let's not fight, we're friends," Cloud said, but then lowered his voice and said in a hushed whisper, "Wanna know whose_ really_ rated E?"

"Who?" Tidus asked excitedly.

"Yuna!" Cloud cried laughing.

Tidus looked puzzled and replied, "Dude...she's not rated E. Trust me."

"No...as in rated E, you know. What does it _really_ mean?" Cloud asked Tidus. Tidus looked up in thought.

"Rated E...for Everyone to play-," Tidus stopped and glared at Cloud who had long since started laughing again.

"Nice," Zell said to Cloud and they high fived each other.

"I'm a genius," Cloud declared leaning back on his chair confidently.

"Well...so much for not fighting 'cause we're _friends_," Tidus remarked and he lay back down on the bed.

"Well, I thought it would take your mind off your little 'memories'. See what I mean?" Cloud asked.

"It didn't work," Tidus replied miserably and started to spin a Blitzball on his finger rather sadly. Cloud rolled his eyes at him.

"God, I don't even wanna be _near_ you if one day you and Yuna break up," Cloud replied shuddering.

"That ain't gonna happen," Tidus said throwing a pillow at Cloud's head.

"Just saying man," Cloud told him and hopped out of his chair into the game crate. "Aha! Look what I found," He announced coming back up.

"What? Money? Beer?" Wakka asked. Everyone looked at him weird.

"I was in the_ game_ crate Wakka," Cloud said breaking the silence and rolling his eyes. Wakka shrugged.

"Well, stop the suspense, what is it?" Tidus asked walking over.

"'Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball' baby," Cloud snickered waving it around. Everyone scrambled to go next to him as he opened the box. But it was empty. "What?" Cloud yelped. Everyone groaned. "That's it! Who has it under their pillow? Huh?" Cloud demanded.

"Eh, forget it. Why do you wanna play it so much?" Wakka asked. Cloud frantically pointed at the cover over and over again (Um...for those of you who don't know...Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball is a video game that consists of mostly girl players, with rather large, um...yeah. And they wear bikinis, and jump around playing volleyball. Yeah...)

"That's why!" Cloud cried hysterically.

"Calm down Cloud," Tidus said and slowly took the case from him and flung it away. Cloud's hand fell limply at his side.

"I mean, I'm so tired of Final Fantasy being rated 'T' for teens. I don't want a bunch of zit faced Geek teenagers playing _my_ games! We should have a petition, and make it rated 'M' for sure," Cloud declared crossing his arms.

"You're sad," Zell commented shaking his head.

"If you could be in any video game except Final Fantasy, what would it be?" Tidus asked.

"DEAD OR ALIVE BEACH VOLLEYBALL!" Cloud cried frantically and banged his head over and over again against the wall. (I don't know why, but I love it when people do that)

"I've always wanted to try skateboarding...or some type of real people sport," Zell replied dreamily.

"Volley ball _is_ a sport!" Cloud cried from his post at the wall. Squall picked up a piece of paper from the ground. He showed it to Tidus.

"Hey! Look at this!" Tidus announced.

Tidus Has acquired piece of paper

"What is it?" Zell asked.

"It's a sign up sheet for the next DOA Beach Volleyball," Tidus said and swiftly took out a pen. "Cafeteria...lady," He wrote and laughed his head off.

"Oh-my-God give me that!" Cloud cried and pounced on Tidus, acquiring the paper.

Cloud Has acquired piece of paper

Cloud took Tidus's pen too and started to write a bunch of names on there. "Voila!" He announced and handed it to Zell to read it out loud.

"Sign up sheet: Cafeteria Lady, Aeris, Rinoa, Yuna, Tifa...?" Zell looked at the others. After they thought about it they nodded and agreed and Zell read on. "And finally..._Sephiroth_?" Zell read in shock. Cloud laughed and buckled to the floor holding his stomach.

"Cloud! You wouldn't!" Tidus cried trying not to laugh. "

Oh yes I would! Sephiroth's hair is long enough for him to be mistaken by a girl, why not try and see if it works?" Cloud replied. Suddenly Zell ran to the bathroom and threw up. Everyone looked at him puzzled as he came back. He came back breathing hard and green on the face.

"Whatever?" Squall asked worriedly.

"Zell! What happened?" Cloud repeated worriedly too.

"Sephiroth...in Dead Or Alive Beach Volleyball...," Zell gasped out.

"Yeah...and?" Tidus asked.

Zell looked at each and every one of them in the eye, then replied slowly, "...Wearing a bikini."

Everyone ran out of there to go throw up somewhere. Wakka didn't even make it, and ended up throwing up on Squall, who when thrown up upon, threw up on Cloud as he threw up out the window. It was a big mess in the end. And the smell was awful.

"Argh...whose gonna clean up this mess?" Cloud asked miserably, plugging his nose.

"Not me!" Tidus protested.

"Let's get the girls to do it then," Cloud concluded.

"The girls won't do it!" Zell cried.

"Well, what are they here for then?" Cloud demanded. Everyone rolled their eyes.

--

Aeris was arranging her pens. "No...the blue one should go first...," She muttered and re-arranged them again. She shook her head and put the blue last. When she was about to re-arrange it again, there was a loud knock on the door and Aeris jumped five feet.

"Oh...ok, it's him," Aeris checked her hair in the mirror and looked back at her carefully arranged desk. "This is my fist session, let's hope to get it right," Aeris said to herself and slowly reached for the doorknob.

Sephiroth was tapping his foot as he waited and when the door came open he turned. "H-H-Hi there," Aeris said in a faint voice, as if she would pass out any minute.

"I'm here to see a...Aeris Gainsborough?" Sephiroth said, taking his pink business card from his pocket and handing it to Aeris. She looked at the dulled out and folded business card briefly and...laughed.

"That's me," She replied tossing the card over her shoulder. Sephiroth smiled. But it was a real smile, so...Aeris, as am I, was truly scared for a second.

"Hey, uh...I just kinda wanted to make it clear that everything I say in this room is confidential right?" Sephiroth wondered coming in.

"Everything sure is. Therapists never tell _anyone_ what goes on in here," Aeris replied taking a seat at her desk.

"That's good," Sephiroth grunted as he sat across from her.

"So," Aeris started, putting on a thin pair of glasses. Sephiroth's eyes darted away from her face and he focused on the trash can._This is going to be a pain! Why couldn't my first client be...Cloud, maybe?_ Aeris thought as she stared down at a blank piece of paper, wondering what to say, and incredibly scared to say anything.

_I didn't know she wore glasses... I mean, she is a therapist...they're smart people, smart people wear glasses..., Sephiroth thought as he watched the trash can,_ Sephiroth thought as he watched the trash can.

"Ok, this is really killing me," Aeris finally spoke up.

Sephiroth looked up at the word 'killing.' "How so?" He wondered.

"I'm just so nervous. I mean, it _is_ my fist time and I already don't know what to say, I had it all planned out...," Aeris grumbled and placed her hand on her forehead.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm perfectly comfortable. Erm...your office is nice, yeah...and-and your glasses...they're pretty," Sephiroth said and looked up at her. Aeris looked at him puzzled and looked around at her office.

"Yes...I did spend all day setting it up. You really think it's nice?" Aeris asked.

"Sure," Sephiroth replied.

"Ok, well, I think maybe it's time for me to do my job and not the other way around...thanks for breaking the ice though," Aeris replied and opened a drawer. She took out a folder and looked through it. In the silence Sephiroth slumped down on his chair and looked up at the ceiling. "So um, let's start with...the early times. Tell me about your childhood," Aeris asked setting the folder down.

"I liked to burn bugs with a magnifying glass and watch them squirm in agony," Sephiroth replied.

Aeris gulped and sweat dropped. "L-L-Let's move on...," Aeris pushed her glasses up and looked around wringing her hands.

"You know, if you don't have anything to ask me, I can just leave...," Sephiroth replied.

"No!" Aeris cried and Sephiroth raised his eyebrows. "I mean...I can't have you leave. I have to get this right! How about, um...God, have you ever considered getting a hair cut?" Aeris asked.

Sephiroth shifted his eyes. "Not...really...," He replied.

"That was stupid, sorry...don't-don't _you _have something youwanna talk about... maybe?" Aeris asked nervously. She took her glasses off and pinned them down her shirt.

"Not...really...," Sephiroth replied again, staring at the glasses. Suddenly a timer sent both of them jumping.

"Oh...that's convenient. A session is only half an hour long, so you're free to go," Aeris said wiping her forehead.

"Great! Good bye," Sephiroth replied hastily and ran out of there. Aeris let her head fall on the table and she hit it over and over. There was a knock after that and Aeris called out miserably, "Come in."

Rinoa peeked out with a giant smug smile on her face. "I just saw Sephiroth run out of here," She whispered as if it was a secret.

"Did he make it under five seconds?" Aeris asked sarcastically.

"Did the session go well?" Rinoa asked taking Sephiroth's seat.

"No, not at all. I don't think I'm good at this stuff," Aeris replied blowing a strand of hair from her face.

"Hey...do me!" Rinoa suggested excitedly.

"Well, you'll be easy. It's just...Sephiroth was so hard...," Aeris said as she walked over to a chair with a clipboard and motioning for Rinoa to lay down on the client sofa.

"Did he pounce on you?" Rinoa asked laying down. Aeris put down her clipboard to give her a weird look. "You know he likes you," Rinoa replied.

"He does not," Aeris objected.

"Does too," Rinoa replied.

"If he liked me, he would have flirted or at least, I don't know, be_ nice _to me. He was still his usual self," Aeris grumbled. But then Aeris put on a thoughtful expression.

"Something _did _happen, didn't it?" Rinoa asked sitting up.

"No, no...I was just thinking about something he said," Aeris replied carefully, hiding her face with her clipboard.

"Ooh, what?" Rinoa asked again.

"You're going to make a big deal out of it and tell Yuna who'll tell everyone including Vincent who'll tell Sephiroth and Sephiroth will find out I told you and it would seem as if _I_ made a big deal about it and he'll just make his way over here with his sword, ready to kill me!" Aeris cried shrilly.

"Geez, take a chill pill would ya? Just tell me what it was. If you're so confident that he doesn't like you than it can't be a big deal, now could it?" Rinoa asked.

"He just said he liked my glasses is all," Aeris replied hastily, turning red.

"Really? Wow," Rinoa said laying back down with a grin.

"You know what? Let's talk about you and not me. You're the one I'm giving a _free_ therapy session too you know!" Aeris snapped.

"Ok, ok," Rinoa replied and shifted on the sofa.

--

Yuna laughed and accidentally tripped on the curb. "Whoa, don't hurt yourself," Vincent said laughing, taking a hold on her arm to steady her.

"Sorry but, did he _really_ say that?" Yuna asked, covering her mouth and laughing again.

"I swear on everything that I have ever shot in my life," Vincent replied putting his hand up.

"Wow, then it must be true," Yuna said taking another spoonful of her ice cream. They crossed the street and walked along a park. "Who knew this little town could have such a good ice cream store?" Yuna wondered watching a kid flying a kite.

"Or a nice Café. Have you tasted this Cappuccino?" Vincent asked extending his cup.

"Nuh uh," Yuna replied shaking her head. Vincent held the cup to her mouth and she took a sip. "Wow...," She replied, wiping her mouth.

"Yeah, I know," Vincent said chuckling and taking another swig. They arrived at the hotel entrance again.

"I have nothing to do now," Yuna said, dumping her ice cream in a trash can. Vincent threw his cup in too.

"I actually want to find out how Sephiroth's therapy session went. Hehehe...," Vincent replied smirking.

"Oh...ok," Yuna said laughing. They came in to the lobby to see Cloud pacing feverishly back and forth.

"Cloud...what are you doing?" Yuna asked.

"Waiting for Aeris to get out of her God damn office! She hasn't left yet! I wanna know how the therapy session with Sephiroth went," Cloud replied.

"Wow, you're not the only one," Yuna said to Vincent and strutted off to go find Rinoa or something. Aeris and Rinoa left Aeris's room awhile later, Rinoa looking a little pale and green.

"Aeris!" Cloud cried running up to her.

"Rinoa...are you ok?" Vincent asked modestly to her.

"N-N-N-No...," Rinoa mumbled and she started wringing her hands.

"Do you need help?" Vincent asked.

"Where's Yuna?" Rinoa asked him, ignoring his suggestion.

"Went that way," Vincent told her and Rinoa nodded a little miserably and walked to Yuna's room.

"For the last _time _Cloud-," Aeris was saying to a whining Cloud.

"Oh c'mon! You HAVE to tell me!" Cloud cried.

"No, I don't!" Aeris snapped and pushing her glasses up she swiftly turned around and left another way. Cloud shook his fist in impatience.

"Since when does Aeris wear glasses?" Vincent muttered to himself and decided to go sulk in some unnoticed dark corner.

--

Yuna had walked to her room, but not before bumping into Tidus who just left Squall's room.

"Yuna," Tidus said with an unemotional face.

"Tidus," Yuna replied and sticking her nose up she looked ahead and pushed past him. Tidus muttered some things and walked right into Rinoa who was on the verge of crying.

"Rinny?" Tidus questioned.

"Hi Tidus," Rinoa greeted padding her eyes with a handkerchief gently.

"Are you ok?" Tidus asked worriedly.

"Not really. I just came back from a therapy session with Aeris...and, and...oh why?" Rinoa cried and ran off crying. But at that moment a door flew open and she ran into it, falling backwards.

"!" Squall kneeled down next to Rinoa who was rubbing her head. "Whatever?" He asked. Rinoa took one look at him and burst into tears. She then locked herself in the room. Squall looked at Tidus who shrugged.

"Don't worry man, I feel ya. Women, they're...they're too confusing! I mean, aren't we in Spring Break, the time of love? Instead, Yuna is going around giving me dirty looks and Rinoa is obviously not happy about something _you _did," Tidus said.(Yeah, they are in Spring Break. That's why they have all this time to do nothing really...)

Squall heaved a sigh. Awhile later a lightbulb appeared at the top of Squall's head.

"...How do you do that?" Tidus asked a little scared. Squall motioned that he had an idea. "Really? What?" Tidus asked excitedly. Squall did some hand movements and signs. "Nah...I don't know what you're talking about, but let's go to the bar anyway!" Tidus exclaimed. Squall slapped his forehead. They walked there and saw Sephiroth staring miserably into a drink. They sat next to him.

"Hey Sephy, my man," Tidus greeted. Sephiroth stiffly turned to him to give an icy glare, but it was weak, and he just stared back into his glass. "Hmm...something's wrong. He hasn't even insulted me yet, or told me to be quiet," Tidus said to Squall worriedly.

"Leave me alone," Sephiroth muttered closing his eyes.

"I'm guessing this has something to do with the therapy session," Tidus said ignoring him and telling the bar guy to give him his usual. Squall sat on Sephiroth's right side and Tidus sat on Sephy's left. "C'mon Sephiroth, you can tell us," Tidus said in a friendly tone.

"No," Sephiroth replied.

"Why not?" Tidus asked.

"Because...you'll make a big deal about it and tell Yuna who will eventually tell everyone including Vincent, who'll come to me and mock me, and I might get into such a rage I might as well go to Aeris's little office and tear it to shreds," Sephiroth replied through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, thanks, can I get some more ice with that though?" Tidus was saying to the bar guy and not listening. He turned back to Sephiroth. "What was that?" Tidus asked. Sephiroth sighed and shook his head. "Look...if you're thinking I'm going to tell Yuna this or something, you're wrong. Even if we weren't in a fight for _no reason at all_ and she keeps ignoring me, giving me looks when she can, and hanging out with that Vincent, and-," Tidus took a sip of his drink and regained composure, "I mean...yeah, I wouldn't tell her," He finished.

"You having trouble with the Pop Princess?" Sephiroth asked and Tidus nodded miserably.

"I wish I had a love life," Zell said appearing out of nowhere. Squall said something in his language about wanting to know why Rinoa was sad.

Then they all turned to Wakka, who added, "I haven't seen my wife in a year, and she has taken full custody of my only child with a messed up divorce."

Then they turned to Sephiroth who shifted his eyes. "What? Are we in some friendship circle or something?" He growled. Squall shoved him lightly. "Fine...I guess...I...I think for the fist time ever...," He started. Everyone kind of leaned in to listen. "I think I'm scared," He said.

Tidus raised an eye brow and looked puzzled. "Scared? You think you're scared?" Tidus repeated.

"Shut up already!" Sephiroth snarled and hung his head.

"I don't get it...scared of what?" Zell asked.

"Now _that's_ when it's personal," Sephiroth replied pushing his chair back and stomping out of there. Tidus decided to go too.

"I think I'm going to try and talk to Yuna...after all, who wants to end up sad and alone like Sephiroth?" Tidus wondered. Everyone agreed and wished him luck. He walked out of there and towards, well, supposedly his _and_ Yuna's room. He was about to knock when he thought, this is ridiculous, why do I have to knock to get in to my own room? He opened the door and found Yuna listening to her iPod, singing as she wrote something down whilst laying on the bed.

Tidus tried creeping out of there, he knew better then to interrupt Yuna as she was writing songs, but it was too late. Yuna noticed him and stopped singing immediately. She sighed and pulled her head phones off. "What do _you_ want?" She asked in an annoyed tone.

"Sorry...I didn't know you were writing," Tidus stammered. Yuna just kept looking at him so he scratched the back of his head. "Um...yeah. I just wanted to know what you were doing," Tidus said.

"Why? So you can check up on me or something? I'm a big girl you know," Yuna snapped angrily.

"Hey, would ya stop snapping at me already? I don't want to fight anymore," Tidus replied apologetically. (Aww...)

Yuna didn't snap anymore, but she still looked like Tidus was annoying her. "I'll think about it. Maybe you deserve a little space," Yuna huffed.

"Fine," Tidus replied and turned to leave.

"Fine!" Yuna cried back at him putting her head phones back on. She grabbed at the page she was writing and crumpled it up. As Tidus closed the door behind him roughly, Yuna sighed and looked at Foofy. He was slumping against the pillow, one ear up, the other down. "Kinda how I feel, huh Foofy?" Yuna asked it. Its button eyes looked back at her and she gave a faint smile.

Hmm...things aren't looking too good. Relationship wise anyway, cause this cupcake I'm eating looks _and _tastes good. Anyway, will Tidus eventually try again to talk to Yuna? Will Sephiroth be brave enough to go into another therapy session? What triggered Rinoa to cry, when she took therapy? And _what about that dang plastic bag_? We'll find out soon enough, hopefully. Hey...where did my cupcake go? Will I ever catch who took my cupcake? Tune in!


	9. Chapter 9: The Cupcake Mystery

Chapter 9: The Cupcake Mystery

I looked in vain for my dear cupcake. Unfortunately, it was no where to be found. I looked everywhere, behind every dog ear and underneath every rock. It was nowhere. I was walking, crestfallen, out of my office. Hopefully, I thought, I left it outside in the rain. The poor thing. Lost...alone...cold. How could I? How could I have done this to my cupcake? But it was too late now, because it was lost and I must find it. Anyway, I was walking out of my office building when I bumped into Wakka.

"Why, hello Wakka," I greeted, tipping my tiara.

"Yo mon," He replied.

"Have you...perhaps seen my cupcake?" I asked. Wakka was pointing at his lips and staring at me. I looked confused. "You ate it? You ate my CUPCAKE?" I cried.

"No!" Wakka yelped shaking his head.

"What then? Have you seen it?" I asked shrilly. Wakka sighed and finally shrugged. He did though, agree to help me on my quest. We walked down the street, looking all over. I even stopped people and looked under their shoes, but I wasn't lucky enough to even find a rainbow sprinkle.

Space

It was night time. The moon was shining like a flashlight upon a lonely but still sturdy cardboard box, in which it was alone and empty and that's why it was so dark inside. But still no sign of my dear old cupcake. Wakka was eating his fingernails out of hunger, and I was pacing feverishly in front of him, my hands frustratingly thrusted into my trench coat pockets.

"We must think Wakka," I continued. Wakka added some salt to his toe nail and nodded, biting it. "Where could I have left my cupcake?" I asked for the millionth time that day. Wakka was about to answer when out of nowhere Irvine comes walking in to the scene.

"Princess! Babe! Where've you been?" Irvine asked with his hands up, grinning and walking over to me.

"Not now, Irvine," I slapped my forehead. But that didn't stop him from giving me a bear hug, almost crushing me to pieces.

"You look so down. Why you guys look so _down_ man?" Irvine asked.

"I...lost my cupcake," I admitted. Wakka nodded hurriedly when Irvine turned to him, aghast.

"Anything I can do?" Irvine asked, loading his sniper.

"Help us look for it perhaps?" I proposed.

"You got it," Irvine agreed smirking and winking at me. I shook my head and waved them forward. Though it was dark, Irvine and Wakka's stupidity combined would give me enough light to find my way...and hopefully bring me the path to my cupcake.

Space

We walked for miles. Finally, after a rain of hail, a blizzard, a tornado farm, and many buffalo stampedes, we found a sign post.

"Welcome to Idaho!"

I wasn't surprised. "Dang buffalo," I heard Irvine mutter behind me as him and Wakka trudged past the mountains of buffalo droppings to catch up to me.

"Search under those droppings. My cupcake could be under any one of them," I ordered.

"Do we have too?" Irvine complained but we both already heard a s_quoosh_! As Wakka had already eagerly dove in the mountains of the droppings to look for my cupcake and possibly other interesting treasures. I gave Irvine a stern look and he reluctantly poked at a dropping wad with the tip of his sniper.

"All clear. I found nothing," Wakka declared popping up from a hole in the ground.

"Alright men, let's move on," I replied sighing with disappointment.

"Ah c'mon Prinneh, don't feel so down, we'll find it," Irvine said sincerely, and I would have taken him seriously if his hand didn't start sliding down my back. I slapped him and Wakka laughed as Irvine grumbled and rubbed the side of his face.

Suddenly a truck full of sheep stopped at our side and a toothless man hopped out. "YoU fEllawZ need 'em ar RiDez eh?" The man asked. I had trouble understanding him, so I turned to Irvine.

"_What_ did he say?" I hissed. Irvine shrugged.

"Idaho language isn't my area of expertise," He whispered back.

"If this man were a woman, _then _would it be?" I grumbled and turned back to the man. "Listen...we're from the city, you know...big buildings, up to date cars, uh...sanitary bathrooms?" I tried. Wakka and Irvine nodded. The man gave us a confused look.

"Hey guys, whadda ya doing here?" A familiar voice called out suddenly. Rikku popped out from the haystacks with the sheep in the back. She waddled over to us, a dead cricket between her two front teeth and hay twigs stuck in her hair.

"Rikku...Hi. What a surprise," I said.

"She's stalking me again! Ah!" Wakka cried and flung his toenails into the air.

"Sis, what's going on?" Another voice came. Then Riku, from Kingdom Hearts, came out of the haystack mess. "Who are these guys?" He asked.

"These are my friends!" Rikku proclaimed with a string of drool coming down her mouth. "The non imaginary ones," She added in a whisper. Riku looked at me and Irvine in awe. Irvine and I looked at each other and I couldn't help it, I grabbed his arm in fear.

"C0Me$z oonn NOW, l37$ G0!" The toothless man cried and hopped in the truck. Rikku waved us forward.

"C'mon, my adopted foster uncle can take us to our house, then you can call home!" Rikku cried and hopped in the back again. Riku, the guy, had walked up to me and was staring at me with awe.

"Can I have your autograph?" He breathed.

"Um, maybe," I replied nervously.

"Hey man, save some air for the ones who matter eh?" Irvine grumbled waving Riku away from me.

"Them city kids, they ain't nice," Riku growled to Irvine all of a sudden and spat into the grass. Wakka hopped on the ceiling of the car, and with his super powers he stuck on there so he wouldn't fly off. Irvine helped me into the back with Rikku and Riku and then it was suddenly silent as the truck started up and we drove down the remote dirt lane.

"Where did ya get your hat, eh Mr. City Kid?" Riku asked Irvine, breaking the silence.

Irvine fingered his cowboy hat and narrowed his eyes at Riku. "_Forever 21_...why?" He asked.

"No reason," Riku muttered, then his facial expression turned from hatred to complete admiration as he turned back to me. "I like your hair. It smells awfully nice," Riku said, giving me that wide eye stare. I inched away and laughed nervously.

"Ain't Riku polite?" Rikku cried clasping her hands together.

Riku blushed, then suddenly again, he had his eyes narrowed and he stared menacingly at Irvine. "Is that a real gun?" He asked.

"Yeah...want me to try it out on you?" Irvine replied sarcastically.

"Come on gentlemen, let's not fight," I said, trying to ease everyone down. Suddenly Rikku and Riku gasped.

"She said the G word!" Rikku cried out in a hushed whisper. Riku took his hand away from his mouth and put it on my knee instead.

"Don't worry, you didn't know," He smiled sweetly at me. Suddenly there was a gun shot and Riku pulled his hand back hastily. Irvine grimaced through the smoke at Riku, who frowned right back at him. As the truck drove on, my mind wandered far off again...and where, oh WHERE could my cupcake be?

Space

Indeed, Rikku and Riku's uncle drove us to a beat down diner where there was at least one phone booth whose cord wasn't bitten off by gophers. "I tried everywhere. Even Yuna's cell phone, but nobody is answering," I said turning to Irvine as I pounded the phone back into the receiver.

Irvine patted my shoulder then lightly pushed me aside. "Let me try," He said and punched in a number. He waited, taping his foot and filing his nails. "Yo, it's Kinneas," He said after awhile. I rolled my eyes and tapped my foot as well. "Yeah I want two cheese pizzas, one sausage. Deliver it to Beat Down Diner Drive. Thank you, Sayonara!" Irvine hung up and turned to me smirking. I gaped at him.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?" I cried at him angrily.

"Don't worry toots, everything will work out great," Irvine declared proudly. Meanwhile, Rikku and her uncle were trying to get Wakka off the car ceiling, and Riku was walking over to me bashfully, hiding something behind his back. "Oh, um...I-I have something, uh...um...before you go," He said to me, turning red.

"Ok," I replied. I turned to him and embarrassingly, he extended his fist and dropped something into my hand, like a five year old that found something special. I opened my hand and stared down at my newly acquired present.

"Wow...a piece of lint. Gee...thanks," I said in a bored voice and pocketed the lint. But no matter how many lint pieces I acquire from grey haired kids that talk in a country accent, it will never replace my cupcake. Then their uncle came by and bowed low to me.

"Don't you remember me Princess?" He suddenly asked in perfectly understandable English, that much sounded like a sort of business man.

"N-No," I stammered from the shock of him transforming all of a sudden.

"Stand back Honey Buns, he's gone mental!" Irvine cried shielding me.

"No, no," Uncle Weirdo guy laughed modestly. "It's me. Arnie."

There was a dead silence. The Earth stopped. TV's went bad. Dogs stopped barking. A raccoon got blown up in the middle of Arkansas, and as for me, well, I stared long and hard at the man who claimed to be Arnie.

"Arnie...?" I gasped.

"Yes, I know, I got a hair cut awhile back," He replied. I shook my head. It all made sense now. I shrugged one shoulder and added up everything that happened, and yes, this was definitely Arnie.

"Do I have to blow him to smithereens my darling Cumquat?" Irvine inquired to me.

"NO! This is Arnie, he's cool," I replied.

"Thanks," Arnie told me and gave Irvine a brief stern glance.

"Alright, well we have to go now, and your Jamaican friend will have to go too. He's permanently stuck to the roof of the car," Rikku informed us. Irvine and I just shrugged. Two seconds later a motorcycle drove by us, and whoever it was driving it took his helmet off. It was Cloud, and he shook his hair. Then as soon as his eyes fell upon Irvine and I, and well, everyone else, he yelped like a little girl.

"What?" Irvine asked, feeling around his face.

"_You_ guys made this delivery?" Cloud cried. Suddenly there was a pause. Then everyone broke out laughing.

Wakka walked over to us with the truck on his back (all the sheep and hay falling out of it) and he barked out laughter too, and cried, "Haha! Cloud delivers _packages_!"

Cloud turned red and started to cry. "Leave me alone! NOBODY UNDERSTANDS ME!" He cried and wailed like a baby.

"Wait, wait," I said hurriedly as I wiped tears from my eyes, "How come you're not back at the hotel resort with the rest? Why are you working during Spring Break?" I asked.

"I...I-I-because I _feel _like it, ok? Everyone else is busy worrying over _their_ problems, and nobody wants to do anything with me so I sometimes deliver these damn packages out of pure boredom!" Cloud cried.

"Well, I'm missing my cupcake so-," I started, wondering if Cloud could help out. He _is _after all, cute and blonde and blue eyed and cute and has a motorcycle--

"Look, just give us our pizza and_ beat it_," Irvine cut me off.

"Fine, here," Cloud replied sniffing and handed Riku the pizza. After Cloud drove away a little tear drop ran down my face, but I got over it as soon as the smell of pizza came to my nose.

"Hey! Hand over those pizza pies!" An annoying voice said out of nowhere when we all were about to get a bite. Yuffie hopped on by and aimed a water gun at all of us...menacingly.

Irvine yelped and hid behind me, trembling. "Please...please, not my hair...please," Irvine stammered eyeing the water gun with fear. Yuffie gave off a maniacal laughter and pointed it at Arnie.

"You! Hand me the pizza and no one gets hurt!" She cried. Riku himself stood before me, trying to impress me I guess, and bravely handed her the boxes.

"Go ahead, take it all! Just please don't cause Lady Princess any harm!" Riku cried out. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Put the water gun down too, please," Irvine whimpered.

"Hmm...no _pepperoni_, eh? We'll see about this!" Yuffie cried. She shrieked like a...I don't know she just shrieked really loud, hurting my ears and waved the water gun around while pressing the trigger. Little drops of water fell down on us.

"No-o-o!" Irvine cried and rolled onto the floor dramatically.

"Irvine! Don't you have a hat on?" I cried rolling my eyes.

He stopped and slowly got up. "You're right," He replied and I slapped my forehead.

"I LIKE TRAINS!" Selphie cried out and popped up from a hole in the ground.

When everyone started arguing and shooting water, hay, sheep, dirt, brownies, and a strange glowing slime I have no idea what it is at each other, Selphie stole the pizzas, the truck, Rikku, Arnie, and even 15 of Wakka's hair. It was too late for us because we didn't notice until four hours later.

"Good thing she didn't take my toe nails," Wakka said cheerfully.

"You know what? What are _you_ doing here _anyway_? I only started this short story to give a little credit to the characters that didn't nail a role in my parody...," I cried at Wakka. He shrugged.

"I don't do anything in your parody! So yeah, I followed you and acted like I was in _this _story, ok?" Wakka cried angrily.

"No! Get out of here and go back to the parody! Go hang out with Zell or something," I yelled at Wakka. When he wouldn't budge I used my magical writing skills to type the following sentence.

Wakka got struck by a series of lightning bolts, and soon after that a herd of squirrels carried him off back to the hotel to hang out with the lucky ones who actually are in my parody (And actually do something, and doesn't show up in this short story as an excuse to be famous and useful. Hehe.)

I turned to Irvine. "Well, I guess it's time we give up. We're never finding that cupcake, no way, no how," I said sadly. He wasn't listening and was grooming his long pony tail of hair and noticed I was talking.

"Oh sorry, what were you saying?" Irvine asked me. I suddenly started to cry.

"I'm never finding my cupcake! NEVER!" I cried and bawled.

Irvine sighed and said sternly, "That's not cool Boo Boo."

"Huh?" I asked with tears streaming down my eyes.

"C'mon! Don't cry! It was just a stupid cupcake! Why the heck would you even start this lame story involving a cupcake anyway? Just buy a new one or something," Irvine complained.

"...Irvine? How could you! This isn't you, I didn't know you felt this way!" I cried shrilly. Didn't he understand? This wasn't just _some_ cupcake, an excuse for me to write some nonsense story involving idiotic things that are just a waste of time. No! It was much more than that. It was a warm cupcake, its bottom tanned and baked to perfection. The top was the true beauty though. It was swirled with pink frosting, and had exactly 34.6 amazing and extraordinary rainbow sprinkles that varied in almost eight different colors! Didn't he understand the true beauty of it? _Didn't he? _I turned to Irvine as I thought all these things. And as I did...I realized something. And then I found myself in complete shock.

"You...," I suddenly breathed.

"Huh?" Irvine asked.

"You! You did it! You stole and ate my cupcake, didn't you?" I cried.

"No! That's not cool, Boo Boo," He said in that cool like voice again. I stomped my foot angrily.

"Then who? Who took it?" I cried.

"Look, would ya stop yelling? All that pink frosting on your lips is spraying onto my limited edition trench coat with real rabbit fur lining," Irvine said dusting his sleeve off. I stopped and...felt like kicking myself.

"I..._I _ate it. It was me."

I ate the cupcake! Why, of course! That would explain everything, and as I swiped a finger across my lips I saw that I really _did _have frosting on them, and it was pink too!

! Why, of course! That would explain everything, and as I swiped a finger across my lips I saw that I really have frosting on them, and it was pink too! 

"It was me, me all along! I ate it, I ate it, oh! That I did! A-ha-ha-ha!" I cried maniacally, and started to laugh hysterically.

Irvine looked at me worriedly, like how everyone does to Rinoa when she eats too much ketchup. I started to whoop and shout and bouncing like Tigger I ran off into the road, laughing and yelling to myself.

"Yep," Irvine announced proudly as he watched me turn smaller and smaller while I bounced into the distance.

"She really_ is _mental."


	10. The REAL Chapter 9: Strife Has a BDay

The REAL Chapter 9: Strife has a Birthday

Vincent was quietly sipping coffee at the dining hall, in his usual spot, in front of the fire place upon a big plush arm chair. For some reason nobody disturbed him while he sat there drinking his coffee or reading a book. He thought it was because of the atmosphere, perhaps the fire blazing away gave off a little warning sign. Maybe it wasn't that complicated, perhaps they just felt the warmth of the fire and simply thought, "Why ruin it?" and never came near so that they could preserve the tranquility of the fire and those around it.

But then again, he knew the real reason. They were all afraid of him. He didn't know what happened...did it happen while he first met them? Was there some big sign on his forehead reading "Back off?"

As soon as Vincent said his first word to them, they had labeled him as the loner. The outcast. The guy you leave alone because he doesn't talk to anybody, and who knows what he might do, who _knows _if maybe he has a dagger under that enormous red cloak? Then again some of them did talk to him. Actually, quite often. It's those who _don't_ know him...bystanders on the street. They all scuttle off in fear, because by judging Vincent first hand by how he looks they already know they shouldn't even be near people like him.

That's why Vincent is stuck with the pathetic losers he calls 'friends' now.

His forehead sign reading "Back Off" works really well when he goes out in public, so whenever Cloud approached him he thought, "Can't Cloud read?"

Whenever Tidus asked him something, or Cloud went on and on about something else, he thought, "These idiots _seriously_ can't read." _He_ knew that _they_ knew that they had labeled him how he is and they were perfectly fine with it. They all had labels, all of them. Some had more than one. They all label each other, and they're fine with it. Vincent wasn't fine with it...not really. He didn't mind that people on the street feared him, actually he rather not be disturbed in the first place. But sometimes...maybe he wants to chat with somebody. Maybe he wants to join in on all the parties the others have and such. But he can't, because he's labeled. He has to act by how they expect him to act, which really is how he acts naturally, but he doesn't really care. If he wants to sit down next to Yuna or something, he doesn't want little Rinoa going around spreading rumors about him. She is labeled the gossiper, but she doesn't_ have _to be. And Yuna, just stands or sits there, acting as if she wants there to be a rumor about her.

But Vincent knows that isn't true, Yuna has told him many times how much she hates rumors, paparazzi, the whole thing. Vincent wasn't used to it...sure, there have been rumors about him before but not that interesting ones, and definitely not recently. Vincent just sighed. Yuna told him not to worry about it, the best way around it is to ignore it. Vincent wasn't used to ignoring things...he was just used to shooting it and getting it over with. It's all Yuna's fault. She doesn't know how to read either, especially signs, those she totally ignores. It all happened so suddenly...she started paying attention to him. She kicked the signs down as she walked and just did what she liked.

There's been a few mild rumors, but they have ended for now. That seemed to satisfy her; she talks to him everyday now, like they were best friends. Sometimes Vincent likes it, because at least he can have a normal conversation with her at times. Not at all like Cloud. Vincent talked the same way with Tifa too, but her mind was always busy with something and she wasn't into conversation. Unless it was on Cloud of course. Why does everything have to revolve around Cloud?

Well, anyway, Vincent didn't know what triggered Yuna because it couldn't have been the woods...that much he knew. First off, she wasn't even herself at the time, her mind was off in 'Final Fantasy X' or something. But then Vincent has thought of this so many times, he actually wondered if at one point she was faking it. But he knew that was false also, he had felt her fear and nobody can act that out so well. Now that they were "friends", Yuna talks to him sometimes a little too much.

It sometimes gets annoying.

Vincent can never know whether she's really into what they are talking about, or if she's acting out the whole thing. Though Vincent is anti-social, there's no escaping the rumor that Yuna and Tidus are in a huge fight. Which they are, because that's all Yuna goes on about. Vincent wonders if she's using him, to make Tidus jealous, or to get her mind off everything. But as much as Vincent doesn't want to talk to her, he can't help it. Once Yuna wants something, she's used to getting it and that unspoken rule is sometimes so powerful you don't dare break it...and there he goes letting her talk to him again.

It was rather early, so Vincent was startled when Yuna walked in. She acted like she didn't know he was there, but it was obvious she came in to see him. She smiled real wide and waved to him, making her way over. Vincent set up a large neon sign reading "I really don't wanna talk right now".

But he watched, crestfallen, as Yuna rammed it down and took a seat across from him.

"Hi there!" Yuna greeted in a mildly groggy voice, and she took a sip from a SpiraBucks cup.

"Good morning," Vincent replied, his eyes traveling back to the book on his lap. "Why are you up so early?" He couldn't help asking a minute later. He couldn't stand the silence, and he knew Yuna couldn't either. What Yuna wants, Yuna gets.

Yuna smiled this signature smile of hers, one she's shown Vincent many times. He remembered it vividly from when they were at Auron's wedding, and she had smiled like that to him when they were in the bathroom stall. Vincent wondered if that whole incident was why she kept coming back to him all the time, but she had been talking to him before that too. He sighed in his mind, confused and annoyed. Why? The question was simply..._why_?

"Oh...hard time sleeping last night...," Yuna trailed slowly, and Vincent noticed the dark circles under her eyes...but she had obviously tried to cover it up before getting out of her room.

"How come?" He asked worriedly. He didn't want to sound worried. But like he was getting hypnotized, he slowly closed his book, set it on the coffee table, and leaned forward towards Yuna so they can once again talk. All of a sudden he didn't care that more and more people were coming in and spotted them talking once _again _to each other, and he didn't mind the fact that he really didn't want to talk. He talked anyway.

Yuna seemed to be pleased and she bashfully fingered her coffee. "Tidus and I fought again yesterday. My mind was so full I couldn't get a peaceful sleep," She said.

"Talk to him, he's probably dying to talk to you," Vincent replied.

"I want too...but there's nothing to say. I said it all last night," Yuna resting her chin in one hand. Vincent didn't say anything, he was tired of talking about Tidus all the time and what Yuna should do. If Yuna wanted someone as a therapist, Aeris was only six feet away. "But I don't wanna talk about it," Yuna suddenly spoke up leaning back in her chair. "How have _you_ been doing?" She asked.

"How do you think?" Vincent replied with a half smile. He didn't do anything all day, nor does nothing interesting happen. Yuna just nodded and shortly afterward turned to Rinoa who was calling her over.

"Well, later. I'm being summoned...again," Yuna said sarcastically and reluctantly got up. Vincent chuckled and waved. Then he picked up his book again, ready to read. But his mind was lost in thought again. The bachelor party. That was it. That one time they both sat down together and started to talk about the woods and stuff...and well, yeah they started to talk. That had to be the thing that gave Yuna the idea that she could talk to him anytime she wanted, and following that when they went to the fair she decided they were friends.

Vincent got up and dropped the book down on the coffee table, and swooped out of the dining hall. How come all of this happened without his intention to? Why would Yuna think they were friends...just because he won her that toy at the fair? Seems like Vincent was setting up the wrong signs after all, and Yuna _did_ know how to read them.

--

"Yunie, I heard what happened, are you ok?" Rinoa asked Yuna as she sat down.

"Um, _yeah_? Why wouldn't I be?" Yuna asked rather roughly.

"I dunno...Tidus says it was pretty harsh," Rinoa replied nervously shifting her eyes.

"Yeah, on _him_. I'm fine, he's the one that has to man up," Yuna said and finished off her coffee with one swig.

"Don't be so hard on him, next thing we know he'll be crying all over and stuff. Can't you guys just make up?" Tifa asked.

"No! That's exactly why...he needs to man up, I told you!" Yuna replied. There was a short silence until Aeris came and took a seat, looking flustered. Her braid was badly made and her bow was upside down, and she looked tired as well.

"Aeris...I wouldn't usually be asking this, but are you alright?" Tifa asked.

"I'm fine...I just think I'm going to take a break from therapy though," Aeris replied.

"Me too. I'm never going back, no offense," Rinoa said. "I was in tears."

"Yeah, we know," Tifa noted and rolled her eyes.

"Not because of you, you're not even a paying client. I just can't stand the fact that I'll have to come face to face with Sephiroth again...," Aeris grumbled and massaged her forehead.

"What's the big deal? If you guys are so bored next time he comes, bring a board game or something," Tifa suggested. Yuna laughed because she thought it was a joke and Tifa glared at her.

"I'll just cancel the sessions until he gets the point and quits on his own," Aeris proposed nervously.

"But then who do you expect will take care of his personality problems? _Cloud_?" Tifa wondered sarcastically.

"Oh wow, thanks, will that be my birthday present?" Cloud asked. Everyone looked at him puzzled. Suddenly Tifa turned around so no one would see her and she flipped through her diary.

"Ah! Today's Cloud's birthday!" She cried and everyone awed.

"And you don't tell us?" Yuna snapped grabbing hold of Cloud's shirt collar.

"I thought my _friends_ would remember!" He cried flinging her hand away.

"Wait...his birthday is _tomorrow_," Aeris suddenly spoke up. Tifa turned around again and opened her diary, then reading it she growled. _How did _she_ know?_ Tifa thought angrily.

"Cloud! Don't scare us like that!" Rinoa cried. Cloud snickered.

"Yeah, well, I never was one to actually have a party on the actual birthday. So I want to have one now! _Now_ I tell you!" He cried and started to laugh evilly.

"Uh...now?" Yuna asked.

"Fine...later tonight. _Then_ I will have my party!" Cloud cried and laughed evilly again.

Then, suddenly, a man came out of nowhere and started to play a long sad song on a violin randomly placed upon his shoulder. The doors flew open revealing a baggy eyed, unshaven, very very very very sad looking Tidus. He slowly dragged his feet over to them while holding onto a white blankey.

"Tidus!" Rinoa cried and ran over to him. Yuna muttered something and rolled her eyes up to the ceiling.

"Hey buddy, you ok? Something's different...did ya get a hair cut?" Cloud asked curiously. Tidus looked up and gave him a really annoyed glare, then sat at their table.

"Guys, I better leave. Something really smelly just entered the room," Yuna suddenly announced getting up.

"What's that noise? It sounds like something really annoying and _fat_...but then again I don't think I heard anything," Tidus spoke up. Yuna grimaced but with a hair flip she strutted out.

"That was really stupid Tidus, you guys are acting like five year olds!" Tifa cried.

"That's the only way Yuna thinks I act anyway," Tidus replied.

"Tidus buddy, my birthday is tomorrow and I'm having a little party in my room tonight. Don't ruin it for everyone, eh? Can't you and Yuna just either make up, or..._break up_?" Cloud suggested.

Everyone gasped real loud and dramatic like.

"You can't break up with Yuna!" Tifa cried at Tidus.

"Why not?" Cloud wondered annoyed.

"Because...," Rinoa tried but she and Tifa looked at each other helplessly.

"Look, just because they won 'Couple Of The Year' for two years in a row, does _not_ mean they cannot break up! _Everyone_ knows Final Fantasy couples never last forever. What do you say Tidus?" Cloud proposed.

"No way! I'm _not_ breaking up with her...I just, I don't know," Tidus said frantically.

"Poor Tidy," Rinoa cooed and patted his shoulder.

"All I know is, if you start crying at my party-," Cloud just finished by pointing a menacing finger at Tidus.

"Hey man! I don't cry ok?" Tidus snapped and pushed his hand away. Then Tidus said he was going to go back to bed, and left.

"Don't give Tidus a hard time Cloud, Yuna's already being a bitch to him," Rinoa warned Cloud.

"Fine, all I'm trying to do is _help_ the kid. But _no-o-o_, Cloud doesn't help anyone, _no-o-o_ Cloud is just annoying, _no-o-o-o _Cloud's beautifully blonde head is full of air!" Cloud cried throwing his hands up.

"Cloud, calm down," Tifa said shifting her eyes.

"No! I won't! Everyone leave me alone! _Nobody understands me_!" He cried. Everyone sat there silently. "Ok...well, don't leave me alone at 8 o'clock. Meet me in my room. That is where the party shall be, and so on. So uh...yeah. Leave me alone until then!" Cloud wailed and walked off. Everyone sat there silently shifting their eyes.

"Did...Cloud get a hair cut?" Wakka asked breaking the silence.

--

Yuna was walking out of her room in a casual dress and all dolled up at eight. She made her way over to Cloud's door and knocked reluctantly, not really in a party mood. Cloud opened the door and smiled.

"Yuna, doll! Just in time," He greeted. Yuna rolled her eyes and pushed past him. Basically Cloud had pushed over everyone's beds to make the room bigger, and there was music and drinks. Everyone was there plus some extras, like Yuffie, Barret, Cid, and everyone else from Final Fantasy VII that didn't get an official part in the parody. Hehe.

Cloud took Yuna's hand all of a sudden and brought her over to them.

"Yuns, meet some of my co-workers," Cloud said and introduced Yuna to all of them.

"Your new girl friend Cloud?" Barret barked. Cloud gave off a laugh and Yuna raised an eye brow.

"Cloud..._what _have you been telling them?" Yuna asked.

"Nothing! Guys, she isn't my girlfriend, just a friend. Ha-ha...ha...," Cloud laughed nervously as Yuna glared at him. Yuna lied that she'd be right back and made her way over to the drinks table.

"Yuna, hi," Someone said and Yuna turned around to face Vincent. She broke into a smile, it was the first time he greeted her directly! She was usually always the one coming up to him.

"Hi! When did you get here?" Yuna asked casually stirring her cup with a small straw.

"I, uh, kinda stay in the same room as Cloud, remember?" Vincent replied and Yuna laughed feeling incredibly stupid. Vincent chuckled too and noticed Barret watching him. Vincent narrowed his eyes and Barret turned away, smirking.

"Something wrong?" Yuna inquired looking up at Vincent.

"Uh no, here, want me to re-fill that for you?" Vincent asked and took her cup from her, though it was new and filled to the rim. He walked off with it and Yuna stood there sheepishly, scratching her arm.

Rinoa came over to her awhile later. "Hi Yunie! You liking Cloud's party?" She asked.

"Eh, it's ok. Hey, I haven't seen Squall in awhile...how come you guys are never together anymore?" Yuna asked.

"Oh...really, I don't know where he is. If you see him around, let me know ok?" Rinoa asked and smiled faintly. Yuna was a bit curious about that smile, but Rinoa got caught up in a conversation with someone else. With Tidus receiving his punishment of "space" and Rinoa acting strange, Yuna tried to look for Vincent so she could chat with him. She found him across the room with her drink still in his hand, looking a bit annoyed about something as he talked to Barret.

"So, how did Cloud get a reach of you anyway?" Vincent asked Barret, and absent mindedly took a sip of Yuna's drink. When he realized what he did he stopped and held the cup as far away from himself as he could and looked up at Barret.

"He has his ways. Nice hotel you guy's stayin' at, mighty fancy. Auron an' Quistis ditch y'all though, after the wedding?" Barret asked.

"Well, of course, though they had the courtesy of letting us stay at this hotel for spring break and their wedding for as long as we wanted, they still had their honey moon to go too," Vincent replied swiping a strand of hair from his face and looking around for Yuna.

"Lookin' for yer girl friend?" Barret grinned. Vincent turned around to give Barret a stern glare.

"You know I'm not like that," Vincent merely muttered.

"Ah c'mon, it was bound to happen sometime! I'm proud of ya!" Barret barked and laughed.

"No, seriously, she's not my girlfriend. She is merely my friend, and _yes _I am looking for her but only to give her drink back-," Vincent started but Barret smacked him on the back really hard, still laughing.

"Friend! Whatever you say...girl being a _friend_, HA!" Barret barked. Vincent winced as Barret smacked him, then he straightened back out.

"Yes! What is so wrong about that? Tifa and I are good friends aren't we?" Vincent grumbled. Yes, he was friends with Tifa but as he said before it wasn't the same talking to her as with Yuna, and she was after all always busy over Cloud and other such matters. Other then Tifa, the other girls didn't talk to him much, so that really did leave Yuna whom he finally spotted walking over to him.

"Vincent! If you want a drink so badly it's easier to walk over to the table and get one for yourself than steal_ mine_ off me!" Yuna exclaimed jokingly. She took her cup back and noticed Barret staring at her.

"Hello, er...Barret, was it? Cloud only did introduce me like ten minutes ago and I already forgot," Yuna said and laughed. Barret chuckled and shook his head.

"It's ok, you got it right though. So Vincent, I'll see ya when I see ya, right Foo'?" Barret winked at Vincent then patted him hard on the head before walking off.

"What was that all about?" Yuna laughed as Vincent rubbed the top of his head in pain.

"Barret was always a weirdo like that," Vincent replied.

"I HEARD THAT FOO'!" Barret cried from all the way across the room causing a lot of people around him to jump five feet, more to the fact the room shook when he bellowed. Hehe.

"C'mon Tidus, you'll be fine won't you?" Rinoa was saying to a miserable Tidus who didn't want to come in to the party.

"I know we sort of half agreed to do that 'space' thing but I can't help it! I'm not good with spacing! I can't space!" Tidus flipped out.

"You just need a distraction. Yuna has Vincent, so that's how it always seems like she really doesn't care and is cool with everything," Rinoa said.

"So...in the inside, she still cares?" Tidus asked with big teary eyes.

"Of course she does! She's just in denial, that's all. Give her the space she wants and maybe things will work out. How about after the party you even try talking to her again?" Rinoa suggested.

"Ok...maybe if I get into the party mood things will seem easier. Eh...I don't wanna go in alone," Tidus replied biting his nails.

"I'll come with you, no worries! Now c'mon, I heard Cloud has something special waiting for everyone, we wouldn't want to miss _that _now would we?" Rinoa said and Tidus shook his head, following her in. "Good Tidus, you're doing better already!" Rinoa exclaimed cheerfully and handed him a red lollipop while patting his head.

"Lolly!" Tidus cried and hugged the lollipop to himself.

--

"Spin the bottle!" Cloud announced pulling off a velvet blanket that was concealing a state of the art glass bottle, which was now laying upon the big circle carpet.

"Good night," Sephiroth announced getting up to leave.

"Hey-hey-whoa-whoa-hey!" Cloud cried getting up fast on his feet. "You better play Sephiroth, or I...or I...I will cut off all your hair while you sleep!" Cloud threatened.

Everyone gasped. Dramatically.

Sephiroth grimaced and slowly sat back down. Cloud dusted off his hands and sat down. "Do you want to play this?" Yuna asked Vincent. He looked at her and noticed she was itching to sit down, this being a game Yuna probably loved to play.

"Looks like we don't have a choice, do we?" Vincent sighed.

"Oh c'mon, it'll be fun!" Yuna exclaimed tugging on his metal claw for him to sit. Tidus was biting all his nails off as he sat with Rinoa in the circle. He was across from Yuna and Vincent, but Yuna acted like he wasn't there.

"Calm down Tidus! Here," Rinoa said and felt around in her pocket. "Uh...I ran out of candy, so you'll have to do with this," She said and pulled out a dog biscuit. What she was doing with a dog biscuit in her pocket I do not know. Tidus didn't answer but just took the biscuit hurriedly and stuffed it in his mouth.

Suddenly out of nowhere InuYasha flew at Tidus and rammed him down. "Hey you! Scram!" Rinoa yelled and InuYasha whimpered, flying away.

After a dead silence of roughly two minutes Cloud went, "Oh...'kay..." And then he shifted on his seat and placed his hand on the bottle. "Birthday boy goes first!" He declared. He spun it and everyone anxiously awaited where it would land. It landed on Wakka. Cloud's eye brow twitched and Wakka grinned. Cloud then blew on it really hard, and it went further to the right where Aeris was sitting. "Woo-hoo!" Cloud cried punching the air.

Tifa's glass snapped in half in her hand and everyone next to her inched away a bit for their own safety.

"Oh," Aeris blushed. Cloud crawled across and started kissing her, almost swallowing her mouth whole (Haha).

They were taking awhile so Sephiroth's fist shook and he clapped his hands for them to stop.

"Alright, alright, wrap it up! C'mon Strife that's enough," He said. Cloud came back to his spot and just smirked evilly at Sephiroth.

"I'll go now," Aeris said softly, still a bit red in the face. She spun the bottle and it almost landed on Cloud again but it landed on Zell.

"_What_?" Cloud yelped. Zell and Aeris shrugged, and Aeris went over to him and gave him a quick kiss. It was Zell's turn and it landed on Tifa.

"_Why_!" Cloud moaned. Tifa gave Zell a quick kiss too. Then it was her turn and it landed on Tidus. Vincent heard a low growl escape Yuna's throat and he sweat dropped. Tidus was inspecting the carpet and didn't even know he had to kiss Tifa. Tifa poked him on the shoulder and he looked up.

"What?" He asked.

"Hello? We have to kind of, uh, kiss now?" Tifa said and pointed at the bottle.

"Yikes!" Tidus yelped looking at Yuna. Yuna's eyes flashed red and he thought he was going to have an accident, but then he thought...Wait! This is the perfect chance to play at Yuna's little "game". He would kiss Tifa right in front of her, and give her a good kiss too! "Oh yeah!" Tidus said and dove at Tifa. Tifa's eyes flew open and she turned red as Tidus kissed her, but she wondered if Cloud was watching.

It seemed he was because he cleared his throat a little too hard, but Tidus wouldn't stop. "Hey! Stop it!" Cloud cried finally and sprayed a hose at them.

Tidus anime sweat dropped and pushed Tifa away from him. "Uh...sorry," He said and went back to his spot. Tifa growled at Cloud for getting her wet, and Tidus then spun the bottle himself and it landed on Rinoa. Yuna crossed her arms and huffed.

"Oh!" Rinoa cried and turned red.

"Well, you guys gonna kiss or what?" Cloud asked. Rinoa shifted her eyes between Yuna and Tidus, but when Yuna looked away, Rinoa just shrugged. She and Tidus were about to kiss when suddenly Rinoa's cell phone rang and she backed off to go answer it.

"Ah, shit, be right back," She said and got up.

"I say we just continue, who wants to have a go?" Cloud asked.

"I'll go!" Yuna cried hastily and spun the bottle. Yuna crossed her fingers, and the bottle fortunately didn't land on Tidus, but landed on Cloud.

"Heh, all right!" Cloud cried. Yuna smirked as she noticed Tidus's face, and kissed Cloud. She kept her eyes closed and looked like she was really enjoying it. Cloud then went, and it landed on Yuna. They kissed again. Yuna went, and it landed on Cloud.

"Jack pot," Cloud muttered happily and he and Yuna kissed once again. Vincent couldn't really watch, so he sighed and looked out the window. Tidus however was practically having steam come out of his ears.

"Can we do something else?" Tifa wondered after Yuna and Cloud stopped. Yuna shrugged, but Cloud was all love struck and fell back unconscious. When everyone got up gratefully, Yuna walked over to Vincent who was dusting himself off.

"Can you believe how jealous Tidus was? God, it was great," Yuna beamed at him.

"Well, so were you," Vincent noted.

Yuna shrugged one shoulder and looked back at Tidus. "Yeah, I was a little jealous. But nothing too serious, I just got kind of mad that Rinoa was actually going to _kiss _him!" She said.

"But the bottle landed on her," Vincent replied.

"Yeah, but _hello_? What about girl code? She can't go around kissing my boy friend!" Yuna snapped.

"But she didn't, did she?" Vincent smirked, trying to make Yuna feel better.

"Yeah, but she was about too! And she would have too, if her cell phone didn't ring. I bet if Squall was here she wouldn't have done it either. Plus she knows Tidus and I are in a fight," Yuna was flipping her lid.

"Look, you gotta calm down," Vincent tried, putting a hand on her shoulder. Yuna looked at it and just sighed.

"Everything's just a great big old mess. I'm not really in the party mood anymore, so I'm gonna bounce," Yuna said and lightly pushed Vincent's hand away.

"I'll walk you out. I never was one for parties either," Vincent muttered and Yuna laughed lightly.

--

Rinoa came back from the bathroom looking sheepish, and she saw Tidus lingering by the drinks table. "Hey, I'm gonna split, 'k? I think the party is pretty much over," Rinoa laughed.

"Oh, alright. Good night then," Tidus replied.

"Hey uh, you gonna talk to Yuna tonight?" Rinoa asked as she put her jacket on.

"Yeah...I'll try. Probably won't come off it bruise free though, that whole spin the bottle thing really tensed things up," Tidus sighed.

"Yeah...I should have declined going to kiss you...she's probably just as mad at me too," Rinoa replied.

"I'll clear ya, if I can get a decent word in. Catch you later," Tidus said and headed towards the door. Rinoa took a sip of her drink and waited for Squall, but hoping that Tidus will be alright.

Yuna meanwhile walked with Vincent to her room and got her keys out. "I need some sleep, eh? Well, see ya later Vincent," Yuna was saying and opened her door.

"Bye, I'll talk to you tomorrow," He replied and waving, he turned around and walked back to Cloud's room to see if everyone cleared up yet so he could get to bed himself. "But...will I really want to be talking to her tomorrow?" Vincent wondered to himself. Eh...he doesn't mind so much anymore. He'd said it himself tonight anyway. Yuna really was his friend.

--

Tidus nervously walked up to Yuna's room. He already had to sleep in Wakka and Zell's room once, he was tired and wanted to go back to his own room. It _was_ his room too after all! Yuna had no right to kick him out. But that's just what she did, but officially this time. Tidus was walking over to it and he noticed the door was locked.

"Yuna, come on, open up!" He called knocking on the door. Yuna opened the door a few minutes later and glared at him.

"I'm trying to get some sleep here, if you haven't noticed," She said in a real annoyed tone.

"It's my room too you know, and I wanna go to sleep also!" Tidus cried angrily.

"There's no room for pathetic jerks who go around kissing my best friend, sorry!" Yuna snapped and was about to close the door but Tidus put his foot down. "C'mon Tidus, just leave!" Yuna growled.

"You come on! Yuna, you're being really unfair with all this-," Tidus tried helplessly but Yuna just turned around and rummaged through a drawer. Tidus wondered if he could go in, but Yuna returned shortly afterward and hung a sign on the wall reading "Room Mate Wanted", obviously proclaiming that Tidus wasn't staying there anymore.

"Try that for unfair!" She snapped and shut the door on him.

"Fuck." At first Tidus growled out of anger, and he watched the sign swing back and forth until it stopped. He was about to leave when the door opened again and he looked up a bit hopeful, but all he got was a blanket and pillow chucked at his head. He picked them up and dragged his feet miserably to Cloud's room. He knocked on the door and Cloud opened it.

"Whoa, what happened?" He asked surprised, letting Tidus in.

"I got kicked out," Tidus grumbled. Vincent looked up from his book and saw Tidus miserably throw his blanket and pillow at a corner.

"Ouch, hey man, you can stay here as long as you want," Cloud said sympathetically and patted Tidus on the back.

"I don't want Blondie taking up residence where I stay as well!" Sephiroth growled.

"Hey Sephiroth, lighten up! The kid just got kicked out. You be quiet or you'll be next!" Cloud threatened. Then he turned to Tidus. "I'm really thinking about it actually, I think he should move in to Auron and Quistis's old room," Cloud said.

Sephiroth over heard this. "Fine, I shall!" Sephiroth cried and he picked up his few belongings and just left. He really didn't want to share a room with all those idiots, and he much rather have a big room to himself.

Tidus picked up his pillow and blanket and threw them on Sephiroth's old bed instead. "Before you sleep make sure there aren't any dead animals under the pillow Tidus buddy," Cloud warned casually as he made his way over to his own bed.

"Thanks guys, I really appreciate this," Tidus muttered ignoring Cloud's little joke. He didn't bother putting on pajamas and just fell asleep under his thin blanket.

"Poor kid," Cloud muttered before going to sleep himself.


	11. Chapter 10: Interview with a Vampire

Chapter 10: Interview with a Vampire

The next day Yuna's room was locked shut, but there was a small crowd in front of her door. "What's going on?" Cloud asked as he walked by also.

"Poor, poor Tidus," Rinoa replied and pointed. Yuna had packed up all his stuff and left it in front of the door.

"Ah, poor kid. He's still asleep," Cloud said.

"Vincent, why don't you try and talk to her? You guys are friends after all...you seem to talk to her more than she talks to anyone else," Tifa said turning to Vincent.

"I...um, ok," Vincent muttered turning mildly red for a few seconds.

"_I'll _talk to Tidus...uh...anyone have a sturdy box of heavy duty tissues?" Cloud asked, but everyone just snapped at him to hurry up. Everyone else walked away solemnly to go to breakfast, and only Vincent remained. He knocked lightly on the door but there was no answer.

"It's uh, it's Vincent," He called. He pushed Tidus's stuff a few feet away from the door so he could come in as Yuna unlocked the door and opened it.

"Oh...hi there Vincent. So sweet of you to come by," Yuna said with a faltering smile.

"Are you alright? Is there anything I can do? I'm so terribly sorry for all of it," Vincent started hastily. Yuna laughed and Vincent looked puzzled.

"It wasn't your fault, why the fuck are you apologizing? Besides...I don't want to think about it," Yuna said looking down.

"That's alright. You don't have too," Vincent replied smiling at her. Yuna sighed.

"I probably look a mess. You wouldn't mind if I maybe stopped by later?" Yuna suggested grabbing hold of her hair. Though it wasn't just her bed hair. Vincent noticed her eyes were quite red, and the circles from lack of sleep under them darkened slightly.

"I'll be at the fire place...uh, Tidus is staying in mine and Cloud's room," Vincent told her.

"Wasn't Sephiroth sharing with you guys as well?" Yuna asked.

"He moved to Auron's old room...we've had enough of him anyway, and he of us," Vincent replied and Yuna laughed. After Yuna closed the door, Vincent picked up all of Tidus's stuff and took it to Cloud's room.

"Have you even told him yet?" Vincent asked as Cloud opened the door holding a candy bar.

"I just...kinda told him to give Yuna the rest she wants, you know? The space she wants etc. I didn't really tell him she packed up all his stuff...," Cloud replied and Vincent groaned. Vincent walked in and Tidus was laying on the bed, his pillow on top of his face.

"Tidus buddy...um, something happened...," Cloud started.

"Good or bad? I could use some good news right about now...," Tidus mumbled. But when he got up and noticed all his stuff on the floor, he just kinda stared with his jaw open.

"Yeah, um...Yuna set it out...outside her door...," Cloud scratched the back of his head, not knowing what to say. Vincent stared at Tidus. He looked...exactly how Yuna looked when she thought he had died, back at the woods. Suddenly Vincent got angry at Yuna. How could she be so brutal?

"Tidus...you'll be alright, I mean just because she kicked you out it doesn't mean a_ thing_. She's just once again saying she wants her space, it's not like it's officially over or anything-," Cloud was saying as quickly as he could but he and Vincent could both see the water works coming.

First it started off slow, but under two minutes Tidus had full on streams of water going down his face. "Wah!" He sobbed. Tidus jumped on the bed and covered himself with the blanket.

"Oh come on Tidus! Be a man! Don't cry! Seriously, you're getting the room and blankets all wet...," Cloud said.

Tidus just sobbed in reply. Cloud looked at Vincent and shrugged. "Did you even talk to her yet, see if you can put some sense into her?" Cloud whispered to Vincent.

"Look, I'm not her therapist or advice giver, I'm just her friend. But...," Vincent added when he saw Cloud's expression of pleading, "I'll try to help out a bit. I can't meddle into her affairs like that you know!" Vincent hissed.

"Meddle? You'll be helping! Look at the poor kid!" Cloud cried pointing at the mound of blankets that was weeping. Vincent sighed.

"What do you want me to say, what do you want me to do?" Vincent asked shrilly as he and Cloud got out of the room.

"Ask her to dinner and talk about it," Cloud suggested.

"No!" Vincent replied almost immediately. Cloud raised an eyebrow.

"Are you really _that _date shy?" Cloud asked.

"It's not a date!" Vincent cried.

"Right, right. But you _will _be trying to emphasize a comfortable atmosphere, in which she can talk freely about Tidus. You have to find out what he has to do and maybe talk some sense into her!" Cloud ordered.

"I'll try...you know, I'm not really the one that does the talking, I just listen...," Vincent muttered to himself.

"Change that tonight! I mean, Yuna tells you about everything, right? She feels more comfortable talking to _you_ more than anybody else, so use that to your advantage!" Cloud replied.

"I don't like taking advantage of people, especially not Yuna. Is it even possible to take advantage of someone as powerful as her?" Vincent asked wringing his hands nervously.

"Please," Cloud scoffed, " I've seen her around you. She'll confess a murder for Jenova's sake!"

"Really?" Vincent wondered thoughtfully. Cloud wheeled around and Vincent stopped walking.

"Look, that's not the point. Talk to Yuna, help Tidus out. This whole fight is making everyone feel down...and we _both_ don't want a depressed Tidus to look after in our room," Cloud said and Vincent nodded rapidly.

"What will you be doing to help out?" Vincent asked.

"I'll keep an eye on the kid. I'm his best friend after all, and I've had more experience with women then you and him put together. You just focus on talking sense into Yuna," Cloud replied proudly and walked back into his room. Vincent grumbled and went to the dining hall to get a cup of coffee.

"I'm Cloud, I'm _so _experienced," Vincent mocked under his breath.

--

Yuna walked in awhile later wearing a Juicy sweatshirt, and matching Summoner's Secret sweat pants, so as Vincent watched her walk by him he wondered if she really was ready or not. He had been thinking the whole thing over, and he decided that to take Yuna out to dinner was doing too much. Why not talk to her here? I mean, did it really have to include _dinner_, and all that?

"Vincent, you wanted to talk to me?" Yuna asked yawning as she took a seat. Vincent nodded. He had called Yuna on her cell phone, using the one Cloud had bought him. It took him awhile to figure out how to use it, but he managed. He also had the luck of finding Yuna's cell phone number scratched onto the back of the men's bathroom stall in the restroom. Vincent thought how he should approach Yuna with the talking he was supposed to do. He tried to smile a big wide smile, but all he got was a scared look from Yuna.

"Vincent...are you ok?" Yuna asked in alarm. Vincent immediately clamped his lips shut and turned red.

"Uh, yeah, I was just, uh...I don't know what I was doing actually," Vincent confessed. To his luck Yuna laughed warmly and he felt relieved. But he still hadn't gotten to his point yet.

"Look...I don't know why you called me, I mean, you had kinda just left my room when you called," Yuna said when Vincent was about to say something.

"Oh?" He asked instead.

"Yeah, so I was just wondering if maybe we could...I don't know. Maybe eat out later. Last time I was in town, I found this pretty restaurant, and maybe some time out of the hotel can do me some good and distract me from the whole mess that's going on here," Yuna said while rubbing her forehead.

"I do agree you should get out, have a distraction. But uh...do we have to go to dinner...?" Vincent asked, and he tried his best not to whine.

"Do you have a problem with that?" Yuna asked sadly. Vincent was going to decline again, but then Yuna said something that made him think it over. "There'll be banana cake. I saw it with my own eyes through the display window. It's probably very good, and I remember you told me you _loved_ banana cake...," Yuna said.

Vincent raised his eye brows a tad. It's been a long while since he had a decent slice of heavenly banana cake. So long, at this stage he'd do anything for banana cake. But he still thought it over. "Well...," Vincent started and he darted his eyes away from her. But when he came back he saw how sad and helpless she looked. "...Ok. Maybe it's good for me to get out too. And have some banana cake," Vincent gave in, and when Yuna smiled and squealed happily he couldn't help giving her a small smile back.

"Ok, well I'll go back to my nap so we can stay out long enough," Yuna replied getting up.

"Wait!" Vincent said before she walked away and he got up too.

"Yeah?"

"I know another place that has good banana cake...and it's my favorite place," Vincent said.

"Oh...well, I'd love to see a place that's your favorite," Yuna replied politely and smiled.

"Yeah, don't worry, you'll like it. Well, hopefully," Vincent added and Yuna laughed.

"No worries, I'll go, like totally," Yuna re-assured him. She then walked off and Vincent got annoyed at the fact that he would have to eat dinner with Yuna after all. But then again, what was the big deal? It was just dinner. Plus she had agreed to go to his favorite place, and he'll be more comfortable there anyway so he can finally talk to her about Tidus. He just hopes word doesn't get out so that others might think it's a–

"-Date! Oh Yunie, what were you thinking?" Rinoa squealed, trying to sound angry but she was overall excited. They were in Yuna's room and Yuna groaned as she was getting ready. She turned around and glared at Rinoa.

"It's _not_ a date," Yuna replied for the tenth time.

"Then why would Vincent want to take you to his favorite place?" Tifa asked absent mindedly as she flipped through a magazine on Yuna's bed.

"Who knows, and I don't _care_. I was the one that suggested we go out to eat, and he sweetly accepted. It's only for me to get out a bit, it's too depressing around here," Yuna grumbled as she brushed her hair.

"So you're saying _you_ asked him out, but you guys decided together to go to a favorite restaurant of his instead?" Rinoa questioned.

"Rinoa! It's not a date! I didn't ask him out!" Yuna cried and walked over to her closet to get shoes. Rinoa tagged along and continued to press the subject.

"What if Tidus finds out? Are you guys even officially over? Would you go out on a date anyway even if you guys weren't?" Rinoa questioned. Yuna turned around and glared at Rinoa again. Tifa threw a pillow at Rinoa.

"Hey!" Rinoa yelped.

"Leave Yuna alone! If she wants to mess around then let her," Tifa said. Yuna growled at Tifa.

"I'm _not _messing around and I'm _not_ going on a date. Will you guys at least _try_ to process that?" Yuna snapped.

"You're getting awfully dressed up, though!" Rinoa pointed out.

"I _always_ get dressed up when I go out, you know that!" Yuna replied.

"Yeah, when you go out with a vampire," Tifa noted turning a page on the magazine casually.

"Vampire? Please. Vincent doesn't even deserve to be called that, why doesn't anybody call Sephiroth a vampire for example?" Yuna complained.

"Hey! Sephiroth is actually pretty nice," Aeris spoke up from her spot against the bed.

"Wow, imagine this. Yuna going out with Vincent, and Aeris claiming Sephiroth is nice all in the same day," Tifa spoke into the silence.

"_Awkward_!" Rinoa sing-songed.

"You know what, you guys are just a pain the neck. I don't even know why you're all in my room anyway!" Yuna cried.

"Yunie, are you gonna let him bite you?" Rinoa asked excitedly.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Yuna replied sarcastically.

"That means you're going to live forever, huh? You're going to be nineteen all your life," Rinoa pointed out.

"Woo-hoo," Yuna said in a bored voice and started to strap her heels on.

"Yuna, I'm actually not kidding. Vincent really is a vampire, so you should be careful when you go out with him tonight," Tifa said in a serious voice.

"I'm not going out with him!" Yuna snapped.

"Right, whatever. But be careful anyway, you don't want to roam around being nineteen all your life and drinking blood do you?" Tifa asked.

"If it will get you guys to shut up-," Yuna muttered menacingly.

"When's Vincent's birthday?" Rinoa interrupted.

"I dunno, why?" Tifa replied.

"Hmm...I don't remember ever going to a birthday party of his," Rinoa said in a spooked out voice.

"He's anti social," Yuna piped in but Tifa shook her head.

"It's because he doesn't get any older!" Tifa cried.

"You guys are insane," Yuna pointed out and got her purse from behind the door.

"Maybe, but you're still telling us every single detail of your date!" Rinoa called out as Yuna walked out.

"_It's not a date_!" Yuna replied for the twelfth time.

--

Yuna turned off her phone as she walked to the lobby. Tonight would be a night of distraction from Tidus, and total peace, without Rinoa calling her every minute of the night.

Vincent was rocking back and forth on his heels at the front desk, staring anxiously at the bowl of mints. Finally he couldn't help it and stuffed ten or so in his mouth.

"Vincent...what are you doing?" Yuna asked laughing. Vincent stopped and looked at her, shocked and embarrassed.

"I like...mints?" He replied with his mouth full and swallowed all of them whole.

"Ok...well, you like them better than banana cake?" Yuna asked.

"No! Banana cake good!" Vincent cried. Yuna laughed.

"I've never seen you act this way! We should go out for dinner more often, huh?" Yuna said and smiled.

"Y-Yeah...sure," Vincent replied nervously and followed Yuna outside. They got inside Vincent's Bat Mobile (Na-na-na-na-na Batman!)

"Wow...this is nice!" Yuna said and looked around.

"Yes, I only drive it in special occasions," Vincent replied smiling. Yuna giggled. _Vincent! What is this? You're getting soft with the enemy! Ok, well...not really the "enemy" but even though Yuna is your friend, it does not mean you should side track from your mission. Yes, you should act "comfortable" but not, well...don't end up flirting with her!_ Vincent thought angrily to himself.

Vincent got a little distracted by Yuna playing around with the radio and admiring the black leather-ness of the car. "Vincent, are you sure you're going the right way? We're heading back to the hotel!" Yuna suddenly spoke up.

"Huh...? Oh!" Vincent cried and realized he was going around in circles. He focused on the road and finally parked in a remote parking lot, in front of a closed down library.

"Um...are we like, here?" Yuna asked nervously.

"Oh yeah, see, it's a secret under ground place and we park here...it's the secret parking area," Vincent explained.

"Weird, but interesting!" Yuna replied. She re-settled her shawl and tried to keep up to Vincent's fast pace as he almost disappeared behind a dark alley way. "Vincent! Slow down, would ya? There's an actual _rule_ against running in heels!" Yuna pleaded.

"Oh, sorry. I made a reservation you know," Vincent replied. For some reason this seemed to flatter Yuna.

"Ooh," She merely replied. Actually, Vincent lied, but the fact that he reserved a table in a restaurant probably meant the restaurant was famous or something and he kinda wanted Yuna to think that. But why? All he needs to do is talk to her, why is he doing all these extra efforts...?

They had to walk through a long dirt road to get to the place. Yuna was a bit tired after they finally got there. "I'm so sorry! I should have told you we had to walk, I'm so bad at this, I'm sorry really-," Vincent started.

"Vincent, it's ok! These were an old pair of heels anyway," Yuna said, and looked rather sadly down at her shoes. Vincent was still doubtful, but in any case they got there and Yuna climbed down the underground steps before him. "This is so sinister. I love it!" Yuna said in an excited hushed whisper.

Vincent laughed. "Wait 'till you see the inside," He replied mysteriously.

"Ooh, the suspense is killing me," Yuna joked sarcastically. The stairs led to a dark hall way made of stone, alighted by torches. "Are we going in a crypt?" Yuna asked a little scared.

"I can only wish," Vincent replied. Yuna gave him a scared look and he laughed. They came to a big wooden door, like Viking pub big, and a wooden sign clumsily nailed onto the front read in blood red letters, "The Cavern Club."

"Is that real blood?" Yuna asked. Vincent didn't answer and just shifted his eyes.

"My lady," He said modestly and let Yuna go first. She eagerly pushed open the door and looked inside. The place looked like something out of the Flintstones, the whole room was make of rock. But it had choppy wooden tables like tree trunks, and tall wooden chairs with animal furs on the back. A warm fire place took residence in each side of the room, and in the far back there was a mini stage, and right now the only guy on the stage was some dude wearing all black, sitting cross legged with drums on his lap.

He took the time to slowly and cooly tip down his sunglasses to get a better view of what seemed like Yuna, the only one in the room who didn't have black hair nor was she wearing any black clothes. Everyone in the club raised their depressed positions for about a few seconds to take a look at the newcomer with bright happy eyes, a normal and healthy looking complexion, and who was smiling as if the world wasn't filled with evil and actual people who don't like coffee.

"Wow, this is so totally retro!" Yuna squealed. A guy actually turned around and glared at her.

"Yuna, uh...can I talk to you for a minute? Over there, in that small dark corner where no one can see us?" Vincent asked.

"Like totally," Yuna replied happily. Vincent pushed her along. "Hi!" Yuna said cheerfully to the guy who was glaring at her, and smiled at him. Vincent pushed her a bit harder and she protested. "Hey, what's the big deal?" Yuna asked.

"You can't come in to a club like this and be all...uh...cheery like!" Vincent cried.

"But...that's just who I am! I don't really have anything to be depressed about, but I don't mean anything by it. At least I'm not treating everyone like zoo animals-," Yuna replied but then she looked over Vincent's shoulder and said, "Hey look! That one is wearing sunglasses _indoors_!" as if it was the crime of the century. Vincent slapped his forehead.

"Actually...you do have something to be depressed about. Tidus, remember?" Vincent replied.

"Oh, yeah. Forgot about him for a few minutes...or ten," Yuna confessed casually.

"Huh," Vincent replied in thought. He wondered if he really had to talk to Yuna about the whole thing...can't he just lie to Cloud and say she wants to break up or something? But Vincent would have to make sure that's what Yuna wants...but then again she should do it herself...damn, Vincent didn't know.

Yuna had wandered off again and had gone to a table to stare at some Goths. She even poked one's spider necklace to see if it was real or something. "Yuna!" Vincent hissed.

"What?" Yuna replied.

"They don't like it when you touch them! Leave them _alone_," Vincent said and laughed nervously at the people at the table. The girl with the necklace just turned her red eyes up to look evilly at Yuna, then she lowered her head again to stare at the table top.

"Her eyes! That was way cool!" Yuna was saying as Vincent dragged her to a table of their own. Yuna sat down and at once took out a mirror to check her make up and stuff. Vincent anime sweat dropped.

"Yuna, as I was saying before, I know you don't wanna do what others say and stuff, but can you at least try to, well...how do I say this?..._not_ act like yourself?" Vincent asked. Yuna put her mirror away in her pink Coach bag, which some people were staring at, in hopes that it will burst into flames.

"How do you want me to act like? You should have told me we were going to a retro dark club or something. And here I am in pink!" Yuna replied shrilly.

"Yes, but...what's the difference? Do you even_ have_ black clothes?" Vincent asked.

"Of course!-wait...no, Ye-no...," Yuna replied sheepishly.

"I'm not asking for much. Just lay low, and well, act _cool_," Vincent explained.

"Cool?" Yuna asked.

"Yes, _cool_," Vincent replied.

"Cool...," Yuna repeated nodding.

"No, not cool, _cool_," Vincent said.

"_Cool_," Yuna repeated and Vincent nodded. "Oh ok, I get it, no worries! I can act _cool_," Yuna re-assured him and Vincent sighed. At this time, a Goth girl with ear length sleek black hair was making her way over to their table. She was wearing a black apron that was almost invisible against her black clothes, so she worked there.

She came from the rock built bar in the corner and had seen Vincent come in. "How very unfortunate for you to be here. What would you like to order?" She asked in a dull voice.

"Usual for me please," Vincent asked quietly.

"Can I have a Cappuccino?" Yuna asked.

The waitress took a long look at Yuna. "Regular, or black coffee?" She asked again in that dull slow voice.

"Regular then...," Yuna replied nervously.

"First time here?" The waitress asked taking a cigarette from her pocket.

"Yes, Elvira, Yuna here has come for the first time. Now, those coffees won't take long will they...?" Vincent asked trying to hurry it up.

Yuna watched this Elvira light her cigarette and nod. "Smoking kills," Yuna peeped up, and both Vincent and Elvira looked at her. And to Yuna and possibly even Vincent's surprise, Elvira started to laugh. Slow at first, then really laughing. "I'm sorry...but it does you know," Yuna said looking at Vincent.

"Believe me Honey, I won't be dying soon," Elvira told her.

"Why? You immortal or something?" Yuna couldn't help asking, and Rinoa's words came back to her..._Yunie, are you going to let him bite you? You wouldn't want to be nineteen forever would you, Yunie? You're going on a date with a vampire...?_

_Vampires! I'm going crazy,_ Yuna thought to herself. "I'll be right back...uh, bathroom?" Yuna asked Elvira who pointed lazily to a back door. "Uh, thanks," Yuna replied and remembered not to smile as she got up and walked that way.

Elvira waited a bit then she took Yuna's seat to face Vincent. "Where'd you pick up this one, eh Valentine?" Elvira asked with a smirk. Vincent glared at her. "I didn't know you started dating again," Elvira continued, putting out her cigarette.

"I'm not dating!" Vincent protested.

"...Yeah? Whose _she_?" Elvira asked. "This..._Yuna_."

"No one...well, ok, she's a good friend of mine...look, this isn't a date," Vincent repeated firmly.

"She's not all together, but...I quite like her. She has spunk. I can tell things you know, before I even officially meet people," Elvira started.

"What are you implying anyway?" Vincent asked.

"Wouldn't she make a great...you know..._one of us_?" Elvira asked, passing her tongue over her canine teeth.

"You must be mad. Not only will I won't even consider that, you still don't seem to accept the fact that I'm not dating her. We're just friends!" Vincent cried.

"Oh c'mon, Vincent! I could tell, you could tell, she could tell, the entire nation can tell that you like her," Elvira replied chuckling.

"Do not!" Vincent cried again shrilly.

"Do too. I mean, so she's not one of us, big deal? I say go for it. She's cute. Besides, none of us here have seen you on a date in _ages_," Elvira said taking out another cigarette.

"Try centuries," Vincent muttered.

"See? There you go. Move on Vincent, would ya?" Elvira said as she got up, for Yuna was making her way over.

"I think I'll be the one to decide if I will move on or not!" Vincent hissed at her.

"_Move on_," Elvira mouthed to Vincent as Yuna came to the table and sat down. Vincent glared at Elvira as she smirked and walked back to the bar.

"Hey, what happened?" Yuna asked.

"Nothing, Elvira's just a friend of mine. She owns the club you know, so of course she's friends with everybody that goes here," Vincent explained. There was a small silence until Elvira came back with the coffee then went away again. Vincent fingered his miserably. Yuna sipped her coffee and listened to the soft jazz music that started up, and looked up distractedly. Then she gave off a little yelp.

"Yuna, what's wrong?" Vincent asked and looked up alarmed. Yuna shuddered.

"There...Th-There are _bats_ in the ceiling!" Yuna whispered wincing, and covered her head with a whimper. Vincent looked up, then back at her, and couldn't help it. He started laughing and Yuna looked up at him, narrowing her eyes. "I'm scared of bats, ok? Sorry I'm not like the rest of these people, maybe bats only refuse to land in black hair..."

"Oh no, see Yuna, it's not only black hair, it's any hair. Bats are just as afraid of you as you are of them, and these particular bats have been trained to stay in the ceiling during open hours," Vincent explained and as he looked up dreamily he continued, "Bats are magnificent creatures. Don't you think so?"

Yuna was checking her hair on her compact mirror and then looked up at him with a flustered look. "Oh, uh...sure," She replied, then muttered, "Takes one to know one."

"What was that?" Vincent asked taking another sip of coffee.

"Oh...nothing, just I lost my favorite lipstick, I think on the way back to the table...Don't worry, I'll find it, it'll probably be the only thing around here that isn't black," Yuna replied ducking under the table. Vincent laughed again. "Yes, well, it's the truth isn't it?" Yuna asked with a smile and laughing too. She decided to look for her lipstick later. As Vincent turned around to look back at the stage, Yuna couldn't take it anymore. Stupid Rinoa and Tifa! They got it in her brain that maybe Vincent is a vampire...but it's such nonsense...even though a lot things would make sense if that were so. While Vincent was turned around, Yuna slowly took her mirror out again. Closing her eyes, she aimed the mirror at him. After two seconds she peeked an eye open, and gasped, putting her mirror away hurriedly. Vincent didn't have a reflection!

"Something wrong? You look awfully flustered...," Vincent said as he rose back up from tying his shoe.

Yuna was looking around nervously, and just muttered, "Uh huh, I'm fine," Even though she wasn't quite sure. Vincent thought that this should be it. I mean, they got to the restaurant and they already had their coffee...pretty soon it would be time to go and he still didn't convince Yuna to make up with Tidus. Vincent drummed his fingers on the table, looking around while thinking of a good way to start. He and Elvira locked eyes when he darted them to the bar, and she smirked at him again. He frowned and looked somewhere else. Why couldn't he just mention something to start off...why does it seem so awkward? They're not on a date after all. Why is it so hard...?

"So...," Vincent started but he couldn't finish. Yuna said so herself...she didn't want to talk about, much less think about Tidus. There was nothing Vincent could do...and she had also said those words to him personally, so he'd be a jerk to suddenly start talking about it. If she had wanted to talk about it, or was thinking about it, Vincent would be able to tell, and she would even be talking about it now. But she seemed distracted, maybe even bored. Tidus wasn't even at least, in the _back_ of her mind.

"Sorry I'm not talking much. I guess this place just gives off this barrier or something, and I just can't think of much to say," Yuna chuckled lightly. Vincent nodded.

"I should not have brought you here in the first place...it's a laid back kinda place where you just sip some coffee and think mostly to yourself. Not a great place for talking," Vincent apologized.

"It's ok. I have nothing to talk about," Yuna replied smiling. Vincent raised an eyebrow for a second, for it seemed Yuna was secretly implying that she knew what Vincent was up too and was telling him once and for all she didn't want to talk about things. Vincent took this as a sign.

"Then...wanna go?" He asked.

"Um, sure!" Yuna replied and they got up to leave.

"Bye Vincent," Elvira called and waved. Vincent waved back, though he knew she was mocking him. They appeared again in the brisk cold night air, whereas when they were departing to go to the restaurant there was sun still. Now the starlet night shone above them.

"Ah, it's cold...let's start walking now," Yuna said and started to walk. Vincent followed behind her, staring at the trees. Suddenly, out of _nowhere_ (Yes, nowhere) a fiend came! Ah, no! Yes, weird how it's in civilization but ok whatever don't bug me. The fiend came and roared at them, and Yuna stopped short giving off a little yelp of surprise.

"Lady Yuna!" Vincent cried and put an arm in front of her, pushing her back. Vincent had his gun ready but Yuna impatiently pushed his arm down.

"Hey! Don't go pushing me like that, I can take care of it myself!" Yuna cried and pulled her pistol from her purse.

"No way, it's too dangerous!" Vincent protested.

"Please! Don't make me laugh," Yuna retorted and aimed her gun at it, but Vincent blocked her.

"Let me do it, Yuna!" He ordered.

"No way! Now move out of my way," Yuna replied and tried to push him aside.

"The faster you let me kill it myself, the faster it'll take for us to get back home. I can take it out with one shot," Vincent bragged.

"Watch and learn!" Yuna replied haughtily.

"No, I rather aim and shoot. Lady Yuna this is only for your safety-," Vincent started.

"Yeah, sure, whatever. I don't need to be protected by ego maniacs anymore thank you! You're just trying to act all macho," Yuna replied crossing her arms.

"What?" Vincent yelped. The fiend was still standing there, watching them back and forth. It finally shrugged and walked away.

"Hey, Joe, you get those two?" Another fiend by the name of Jeff asked.

"Nah, they're better off killing each other if you ask me. They were all arguing over who gets to shoot me or not!" Joe rolled his eyes.

"Ha, well, what can you do? Humans I guess. You steal anything?" Jeff asked.

"Nada, man. By the looks of the guy though I don't think he had anything valuable on him...probably a bum or something," Joe replied.

"Eh, figures. So, poker night at Fred's?" Jeff asked Joe as they made their way into the woods.

"Yeah, sure man...I need a beer."

--

"Look what you've done! The fiend even got bored over us," Yuna snapped and frustrated, she shoved her gun back in her purse and started to walk away steadily.

"Oh Yuna, come on, wait up!" Vincent called and ran to catch up to her.

"The dinner wasn't the best, but you didn't have to end it by acting like a total jerk," Yuna muttered to him.

"Yes, I'm sorry about that, but...how can I be sorry for losing that fiend?" Vincent replied and stepped in front of her so she could stop walking. Yuna glared at him. Vincent put on a smile and Yuna looked confused. "How can I...when you look so cute when you're in danger?" Vincent continued and found at once that it worked.

Yuna seemed to forgive him faster than you can shoot a bullet and she tried her best not to smile but you could tell it was there. "Yeah, well...I'm not a little girl anymore. Next time a fiend comes,_ I'm_ the one to blow it's head off," Yuna declared and Vincent nodded reluctantly.

"Fine, fine...but you're still not better than me," Vincent smirked walking ahead.

"Hey!" Yuna cried and caught up him, punching him on the arm. Vincent laughed and Yuna just crossed her arms, pretending to be mad. Their happiness ended for a sec when they came across a huge pile of logs blocking the path. "What the hell?" Yuna cried out bewildered.

"This is very unusual," Vincent muttered scratching his chin.

"Hmph...everything so we don't get back home, right? This is all Cloud's doing. He got Squall or someone to get those logs there, and that was probably Wakka in a fiend costume by the way it didn't even attack us," Yuna confirmed.

"Maybe, but we still can't get over these logs. I wonder what we're going to do," Vincent asked and looked up at Yuna.

"There are woods here...can't we go through them?" Yuna asked.

Vincent laughed. "I wouldn't want to go through _that_ again," Vincent said, but Yuna raised an eyebrow and he shifted his eyes telling her to never mind. Yuna stayed quiet for awhile then she walked over to some bushes. "Lady Yuna?" Vincent questioned.

"Aha! I heard water. There's a river right here!" Yuna exclaimed. Vincent chuckled and walked over to her.

"Very good, Lady Yuna. I didn't know you to be the explorer," Vincent said and Yuna rolled her eyes, laughing sarcastically. Vincent looked out over the river and pointed. "Look! Just our luck. _Somebody_ left a small boat there," He said.

"Ooh! Let's take it and get out of here!" Yuna cried turning to him.

"That may be crazy enough to work, Lady Yuna. You are truly a mastermind," Vincent replied sarcastically and Yuna laughed.

"What if I am?" She asked slyly and started walking down the small hill to the boat. Vincent followed. He then heard a little "ew" of protest from Yuna, who got to the boat first. "What? Did you find a dead body or something?" Vincent asked.

Yuna turned to him and gave him a weird look, shaking her head. "No! It's just wet, that's all," Yuna complained hugging herself from the cold.

"Oh, well aren't we the picky one? Here, if you must," Vincent replied and reluctantly took his cloak off and handed it to her.

"Oh, why thank you. But uh, maybe for your birthday I'll buy you a more stylish jacket, huh?" Yuna joked and Vincent rolled his eyes. She set it on the seat and sat on it, but it was long enough for her to wrap it around herself from the cold. Vincent took a seat across from her and looked around.

"Don't tell me the guy didn't leave an oar," Vincent said nervously and looked under the seat and everywhere. Yuna laughed and Vincent looked up at her. She was waving the oar around giggling. "Oh...give me that!" Vincent laughed and took it from her. He pushed the boat and they floated down the midnight blue river.

"Wow...this is great!" Yuna said in a hushed whisper, and she looked around in awe.

"Yeah," Vincent replied and sat back against the boat, looking sideways at the night, not at the other end of the boat where Yuna was. Suddenly he heard a little sound...and he shifted his eyes bewildered.

_There you see her... _

...Sitting there across the way...she don't got a lot to say...

But there's something about her...

"What was that?" Vincent wondered, now looking left and right hastily.

"Huh?" Yuna asked and coughed lightly.

"I just...never mind...," Vincent replied turning red and let it go.

_And you don't know why... But you're dying to try... _

You wanna...kiss the girl...

"_What_?" Vincent yelped as the song had come back and he heard what it said.

"What? What happened?" Yuna asked alarmed.

"I...didn't you...? Oh...never mind," Vincent muttered frustrated.

"You sure?" Yuna asked quietly, and Vincent nodded. "Ok," Yuna smiled at him then she gazed her eyes upward again to look at the sky. Vincent noticed how peaceful she was and how this really was a good day for her not to think about the troubles with she had with Tidus, and here he was ruining it by acting totally paranoid. But that song...

_Yes, you want her... _

Look at her, you know you do! Possible she wants you too...There's one way to ask her!

It don't take a word, not a single word! Go on and...kiss the girl...

"No way, who-whose singing that? Come out already!" Vincent cried angrily without thinking. He then looked at Yuna who was giving him a scared look.

"Vincent...," Yuna started but Vincent shook his head.

"I'm sorry, It's just that I hear...well...I hear-," Vincent started but it came back again!

_Sha la la la la la, My oh my! Look like the boy too shy, ain't gonna kiss the girl...  
Sha la la la la la, ain't that sad? Ain't it a shame? Too bad, he gonna miss the girl..._

"Hey, wait a minute!" Vincent cried out again and stood up. Yuna whimpered in fright, and Vincent lowered his fist slowly as he looked down at her. "Yuna! I, it's nothing, I'm sorry...I lost my temper," Vincent admitted and lowered himself again.

"Over what? Is there something out there...?" Yuna asked looking around and gripping the cloak around her.

"No, no...," Vincent replied nervously. He decided to let it go completely, and ignore it. Yuna was probably thinking he was going mental or something. The boat had rocked when he stood up, so it reminded Vincent to check where they were heading.

"Here," Yuna said gently and took the oar from him lightly. Vincent blushed and watched Yuna steer the boat ahead and stay in the middle of the river, but she did it lightly so as the boat continued to go slow.

"Won't you push it a little harder, so we could get home faster?" Vincent asked. Yuna handed the oar back to him laughing.

"Can't you handle the cold, Mr. Gunsman?" Yuna asked playfully.

"Well, _you're_ the one with _my_ cloak...of course I'm cold!" Vincent replied and Yuna laughed. Vincent gave off a small smile but at once, when he thought he had finally forgotten...

Now's your moment...

Floating in a blue lagoon, Boy you better do it soon! No time will be better...

She don't say a word, and she won't say a word, until you...kiss the girl...

Vincent growled but just waved it off his ear with his hand as if keeping a fly away, and as if that would stop the song. He watched Yuna then lean out the boat and giggling, let her finger streak the water. "No, but actually I like it slow. I mean, look at that sky, and that moon! I haven't had a peaceful state of mind in a long time...and it just feels so nice, and comforting. Don't you feel it too?" Yuna asked smiling, referring to Vincent's original question of why she wanted the boat to go slowly.

"Um...," Vincent started but never finished, because Yuna got carried away again by the moon and as she looked up Vincent sighed.

"Listen to what she said...she's having a nice time, why can't you relax?" Vincent muttered to himself. Yuna suddenly giggled and Vincent looked up.

"I, uh...kinda heard you," Yuna replied and giggled again.

"Oh," Vincent replied and he was instantly glad it was dark, because he was sure he was as red as a tomato, and he pinched himself for muttering loud enough for Yuna to hear anything. Yuna gave a little laugh and stood up. "Lady Yuna?" Vincent questioned puzzled.

"Calm down silly," Yuna replied and sat down again, but on the middle seat right in front of Vincent. Vincent backed away the little he could but there wasn't room to go any farther.

"The stars and the moon are wonderful but...that doesn't take the cold away. Let's say we go faster huh?" Yuna asked and Vincent nodded, kind of absentmindedly taking the oar and starting to row it faster. Then...

_Sha la la la la la, don't be scared! You got the mood prepared, go on and kiss the girl... _

Sha la la la la la, don't stop now! Don't try to hide it how, you want to kiss the girl...

"No...," Vincent muttered angrily and Yuna just kind of shifted her eyes and let it go. Her hand went against Vincent's leg and with the song going...

_Sha la la la la la, float along! And listen to the song, the song say kiss the girl... _

Sha la la la la, let the music play! Do what the music say, you got to kiss the girl...

"I...no...!" Vincent hissed a little louder and Yuna truly looked worried now. She didn't want to ask, Vincent would probably not answer. What was going on with him...?

_You've got to kiss the girl! You wanna kiss the girl! You've gotta kiss the girl! Go on and... kiss the girl..._

"That's it!" Vincent cried out and Yuna yelped as he stood up again, but since Yuna was sitting closer the boat had totally lost control, and Yuna screamed as it tipped over. The river wasn't that deep, so Yuna immediately got up, soaked.

"Lady Yuna, oh...Geez...," Vincent started and he scratched his head. Yuna merely turned around slowly and looked at him, with her face wet and her mascara dripping down her face. The sound of the river water rushing past just below their knees could be heard in the silence.

"Well," Yuna said, and she took Vincent's soaked cloak off of her. "I guess you can have this back now." Vincent took it and Yuna laughed, watching him hold it out in front of him as it dripped.

Ooh...Vincent's busted! Haha. Well, I guess we'll have to wait to see what happens when those two youngsters walk right in to the hotel soaked to their skin. And what about that singing, that drove Vincent mad? Who did it? Did Cloud really did secretly set all this up, and was it _Wakka_ maybe singing? Is Tidus still moping around and stuff, and when will Sephiroth be brave enough to confront Aeris in another therapy session? Stay tuned!

Music Credit: "Kiss the Girl" - Little Mermaid (Come on, I know you all loved that song, haha)


	12. Chapter 11: Yuna Comes to a Decision

Chapter 11: Yuna Comes to a Decision

As Yuna watched the drops of water coming from her land on the carpet and stain it, she crossed her arms from the cold and tried to move as quickly as she could from the lobby to her room so no one would see her.

"Yuna...I'll see you, uh...later?" Vincent half asked, but shook his head in defeat. He didn't deserve to have Yuna see him later, so he just hung his head and walked away.

"Yeah, that would be-," Yuna was saying, because poor Vincent just looked so sad while the whole thing wasn't his fault.

"What's this? _What's this I see_?" Someone suddenly called out interrupting her. Cloud walked in with the biggest smirk, and Yuna gave up entirely on walking away. Once Cloud spotted you, it was over for sure, you were dead alright.

"Cloud-," Vincent started but it was no use. You could tell as Cloud shook his head that he was reciting what he was going to say.

"Tsk, tsk. I thought better of you Yuna. I mean, _seriously_-," Cloud started.

"Shut up Cloud! You're nothing but a blonde annoying little idiot with a weird choice of a name! You know this is not what it looks like!" Yuna exploded.

"-I thought you had a more creative mind, I mean obviously since you're such a gifted song writer. And here you are using the same technique again. But I guess the classics never fail. You know, I think I just might try swimming around in a lake to get a girlfriend," Cloud continued, then he couldn't say anymore even though he wanted too because he was dying to laugh and that's just what he did, he started laughing his head off.

Yuna sighed and slapped her forehead. Vincent was staring at Cloud, possibly hoping he'd burst into flames. Don't we all hope that? Don't we all? Just kidding Cloud, I love you. Well, uh...anyway...

"I mean c'mon! WHAT is it with Final Fantasy X people and _water_? I guess it never ends does it, probably cause it's so...efficient!" Cloud exploded and started laughing even more.

Wakka strolled in and looked at the scene. "What is going on, ya?" He asked.

Before Yuna could reply Cloud pointed at her and Vincent and exclaimed, "Hey Wakka! Look familiar?" and started to laugh and hang onto Wakka's shoulder, crying from laughter. Wakka shifted his eyes and wondered why Cloud was touching him.

"Get off my arm, ya," Wakka growled and Cloud backed away but still laughed.

"Those weird Final Fantasy X people. Haven't they ever heard of bathing suits? And last time I checked, people swam during the day time! Also, I had no idea Vincent could breathe under water too. Is there some way you can _detect_ that in guys Yuna? Honestly, I wanna know. I didn't even know Vincent could swim!" Cloud continued. Wakka chuckled, than started to bark out in laughter with Cloud.

"Wakka!" Yuna snapped.

"What?...Ya?" He asked.

"You're from the same fucking game! You're taking_ his _side?" Yuna cried.

"Sorry Yuna, but it's true...Ya," Wakka said, then he looked at Cloud who looked at him and they burst out laughing again.

"This is so immature. I'm leaving," Yuna huffed and walked out.

"Try not to get the hall way _too_ wet_ Lady_ Yuna, us land lubbers like to walk here you know!" Cloud shouted after her. Then Cloud turned to Vincent. "I'm surprised you didn't sink Valentine, with that heavy cloak." Cloud smirked.

"Stop it already would you? The night already went terribly wrong without you adding to it, then rubbing it in," Vincent muttered.

"Yeah, whatever. Anyway, you did what you were supposed to do?" Cloud asked.

"No," Vincent replied shaking his hair free from water.

"What?" Cloud yelped.

"I'm not meddling in Lady Yuna's affairs. It seems to me she wants to break up with Tidus more then to the fact that she wants to make up. I'm not going to tell her what she should and should not do," Vincent replied.

"I get it," Cloud suddenly said. Vincent raised an eyebrow at him in surprise. Cloud grinned.

"What? You actually get something? Now _I'm _surprised...," Vincent said.

Cloud kept grinning. "You don't want Yuna to make up with Tidus at all. You're gonna leave the matter alone because you know she's gonna break up with him. Because you_ like_ her! You wanna _kiss_ her! You wanna _marry_ her! Because you _love_ her!" Cloud singed, mocking Vincent as he jumped around him.

"Don't be stupid," Vincent growled.

"You _wa-a-a-nt _her! You want her to _love_ you-u-u! Because you_ love _her, and you wanna _marry_ her!" Cloud continued, sticking his tongue out playfully.

Vincent clenched his fists. "I'm not afraid to hurt you Cloud," Vincent snapped.

"You wouldn't hurt _Yuna_. You like her," Cloud whispered grinning. Vincent tripped him and he fell but he got up and grinned at Vincent again. "I wonder what Tidus would think. Having his girlfriend taken away from him by some guy the complete opposite of him. That's gonna hurt _so_ bad," Cloud said. "As a matter of fact, a lot of strange loves have been happening at the moment...can you believe Zell's marrying a hotdog named Lily on Friday? Now you and Yuna? The world has truly gone insane. Heh...at least I'm not the only one to go insane this time...well, _anyway_ we should make sure this is alright with the Final Fantasy producers and all...I don't think they're gonna be too happy," Cloud continued.

"Forget the dumb producers. We can do what we want," Vincent replied.

"So you _do_ like Yuna!" Cloud shouted.

"Leave me alone Cloud," Vincent growled and gave Cloud such an evil glare that Cloud finally shut up.

"Fine. I'll leave the matter alone. But if you guys get together, be ready to face me saying 'I told you so!' all the time I come across you, and perhaps in different languages if I can master it. And I'll pop up at any moment. Always reminding you that I told you so...always...," Cloud said mysteriously and faded into the darkness. Vincent rolled his eyes and went in to his room.

--

Sephiroth cursed everything he knew and everything in his sight as he made his way to Aeris's room. Another _fucking_ therapy session, and he wasn't very happy about it. He knocked on the door and Aeris opened it, stammering something. Sephiroth thought she was trying to say "Hello". He just walked in and sat down quietly.

"I guess I should just tell you. Today's session is going to be like the last. I can already tell, so you see...I don't think you should come here anymore. Have therapy with me, I mean. It's not you, it's me, really so whatever you do please don't get mad," Aeris whimpered and hid under her chair.

"No more therapy sessions?" Sephiroth inquired.

"Yes, no more. It's too hard and stressful for me, I don't know why, maybe it _is_ you and not me but whatever it is I can't do it. I tried to have a plan set out so I knew what I'd do but I still can't follow through with it... I'm guessing that's my limit. I'm sorry, but you may leave now," Aeris said. She sat firmly on her chair and watched Sephiroth across the desk.

"But-," Sephiroth started and Aeris shook her head.

"I'm sorry Sephiroth, but it isn't working out. I'm sure you're disappointed but this is really getting in my way and I want to be able to peacefully do my job. I can't do that when I have this secret fear in the back of my mind that you'll come back and it will be a disaster, so that's why I can't see you anymore--I mean s-s-see you in therapy, yeah that's what I meant, yeah...," Aeris said nervously and watched Sephiroth's reaction. He just sat there staring at her. "Don't take it personally," Aeris added looking down.

"Alright. I understand. What if...I start paying you?" Sephiroth asked and Aeris looked up.

"What? What, no! Sephiroth, can't you see? It's obvious you don't like therapy with me. You're not being forced into this you know, you can leave, you can quit! I'm giving you the chance to _quit_!" Aeris cried frantically.

"But I don't _wanna_ quit! You may think having sessions with me is a disaster but the point of therapy is for me to like it and see how it works, and get my thoughts straight. You're just there to help. I say it's going fine, and I see no need to quit," Sephiroth made his mind and crossed his arms.

"But-But...I...I'm really, I'm really helping you?" Aeris wondered faintly.

"Yes," Sephiroth replied shifting his eyes.

"Oh...," Aeris replied and frowned in concentration.

"I'll let you think on it. Here...I kinda, you know...promised," Sephiroth suddenly said getting up and tossing a black case onto the desk. He left and Aeris looked at it.

"Please let it not be a bomb," She prayed and carefully took it, opening it. She gasped. She took a shiny, new, crystalized pink pen from the case and looked at it. "It's so pretty and...shiny," Aeris noted turning it around in her fingers. There were pretty black flowered designs on it too, the black looking dazzling against the pink. "I love flowers," Aeris said to herself again and placed the pen among her other ones. But then she took it back and placed it back in the case. Then she locked it in a drawer.

--

Aeris had come back from a lunch break and took a seat at her desk again. She looked around her empty room, then quietly opened the drawer containing the black case. As she opened and peered inside to view the pink marvel again, its shiny self with its black designs and the glitter of the color catching the light made Aeris awe at it again. She tossed the case over her shoulder and gripped the pen as if she was going to write.

"It suits me so well, and I love it so much. But how can it possibly be a present from _him_? It just doesn't _fit_ that way...," Aeris said and took out a blank sheet of paper. She started to write her name over and over again in big cursive letters, the magic of the pen's color seeming to make its inked words magic. Then Aeris wrote Sephiroth's long name, then she wrote hers, then his, then hers again and before she knew it there was 'Sephiroth' and 'Aeris' written all over it.

"Oh dear!" Aeris breathed and dropped the pen. Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Aeris yelped, crumpling the paper and calling out, "Come in!"

Yuna came in looking totally flustered. "Oh Aeris! I need like, major help. You free?" Yuna asked. Aeris nodded. Yuna squealed and smiled, then her eyes traveled to Aeris's desk. "Nice desk, and oh! Nice pen! Can I see that?" Yuna asked and Aeris nodded again as she watched Yuna pick up Sephiroth's present. "The shiny pink color is so groovy. But don't you think the black flower designs kinda clash it?" Yuna asked handing it back.

"No! Black and pink together is a beautiful match," Aeris protested cradling the pen and glaring at Yuna.

"Sorry...Anyway, I have a major crisis," Yuna said sadly settling into a chair.

"You broke a nail?" Aeris asked sarcastically, carefully putting her precious pen away in a drawer where no one would find it.

"Hey! Not _this_ time," Yuna snapped but then she sighed deeply.

"Something really _is_ wrong. What is it?" Aeris asked.

Yuna suddenly got up and made sure the door was locked, and she closed all the windows. She sat back down and looked Aeris right in the eyes. "I think...I think I want to break up with Tidus," Yuna said firmly, and bit down on her thumb nail.

Aeris gasped loudly and dramatically. "No!" Aeris cried doubtfully but Yuna nodded.

"I know, _I know_! I feel so totally horrible, I feel so...two faced, you know? But I'm not _doing_ anything wrong, I mean, I don't want to _hurt _poor Tidy but I don't want to date him anymore either. I don't know what to do," Yuna wailed and set her head hard on the desk top.

"This is pretty extreme," Aeris said seriously and Yuna began to cry.

"I know, don't remind me! But I have to do something, I just do!" Yuna sniffed.

"Calm down Yunie, it'll be alright. It's going to be tough though...I don't think you _or _Tidus are willing to have two whole years go down the drain," Aeris said.

"It's not going down the drain! I'm not forgetting about Tidy, not at all! I just wanna be friends!" Yuna cried.

"Ok, ok. Now...is there a specific _reason _you wanna break up?" Aeris asked.

"No...not really...," Yuna replied shifting her eyes.

"Yuna...," Aeris inquired leaning forward and giving her a stern glance.

"Fine! I-I...I think I like someone else," Yuna replied.

Aeris gasped again. "Yuna, are you serious?" Aeris asked.

"_Yes of course I'm serious_! This isn't a joking matter you know!" Yuna snapped. Then Yuna went on and on about how confused and desperate she was and stuff like that, while Aeris absently took her pen out again and started to doodle "Sephiroth" on her clipboard.

"And-Aeris? Aeris? You listening to me?" Yuna cried after twenty minutes.

"Oh, uh, sorry...um, so you like someone else. So Yuna, what do you think the producers will say about this?" Aeris asked setting the clipboard down and putting the pen somewhere where it wouldn't draw her attention.

"Oh, you're right! Oh, gee, my life is ruined," Yuna grumbled and sat miserably on the client couch.

"I'm glad I don't have this problem. Not that I would, I can date anyone I want because my character is dead," Aeris replied simply and her eyes caught her pen again and she started to look at it and pet it.

"...Aeris...you're a genius!" Yuna cried hopping up.

"Huh?" Aeris asked.

"You're dead! You're _dead_, haha! Yes!" Yuna cried twirling around.

"Hey, that's a _bad_ thing you know! I had a lot of fans...," Aeris huffed.

"No, not that! _Tidus_! He's gone, he's not _real_! His character, I mean. I can date anyone I want too! I'm not taken! Heh, I wanna see those producers try to find a loop hole in that!" Yuna cried triumphantly.

"You do have a point actually," Aeris replied stroking her chin. Yuna squealed. "And to think that you're supposed to be _sad _he's gone," Aeris grumbled.

"Who cares about that, I'm a new woman. Fuck it, I even have my own sequel. I don't need Tidus. I don't need anybody, but I _can_ date other guys!" Yuna squealed again.

"Oi," Aeris muttered and shook her head.

"Anyway, we got through that problem. Now how the hell do I break up with the guy?" Yuna wondered frantically, starting pacing back and forth across the room.

"Tidus, sorry, I learned how to use a gun I don't need you anymore?" Aeris suggested.

"Aeris, this isn't funny, I don't want to hurt the poor guy. I just...you know, need to clear the relationship," Yuna replied looking up in thought.

"I guess you have only one choice to practice, cause I'm sure as heck not going to pretend to be Tidus for you," Aeris said and opened a drawer as Yuna laughed nervously. "Here," Aeris then placed a Tidus and a Yuna doll on the desk.

"Ooh, how did you get those?" Yuna asked bending down over them.

"Uh...let's not ask questions, ok?" Aeris said laughing nervously. "Ok. Let's say Tidus is here...," Aeris continued and placed Tidus standing up on a corner. "And let's say he's talking to Cloud..." Aeris took a Cloud doll and placed it standing next to Tidus.

Yuna grinned. "Aeris," She said, "Why do you have a Cloud doll?"

"Leave me alone, I'm trying to help you aren't I?" Aeris snapped and placed the Yuna doll on the far side of the desk. "Now let's say you're talking to uh...hmm...all I have is Tifa left," Aeris said and took out a Tifa doll. Except Tifa had her head crushed and dangling on her shoulder, lot's of stab marks of what looked like a pen's doing, and her eye balls had been squeezed out. Yuna stared at the beat up Tifa doll, then gave Aeris a terrorized look. "_Ok_, let's put Tifa _away_ now shall we? Let's just say she...died. Haha," Aeris said and tossed the Tifa doll over her shoulder.

Yuna backed away a few inches.

"Take these dolls and practice. Everything you're going to do, and most importantly, say," Aeris said seriously.

"Do you have a Vincent doll?" Yuna asked excitedly and peered over Aeris's desk. Aeris pushed her away and glared at her.

"No!...You can't have him," Aeris then quickly took the Cloud doll and put him in the drawer. "You can't have Cloud either. All you need is Tidus and yourself to practice. Now you can leave," Aeris said and pointed to the door.

"Ok. Thanks a lot Aeris," Yuna replied sweetly then she whistled as she took the dolls and walked out of the door. "Uh...I mean," She said and stopped whistling.

Aeris raised an eye brow and sighed. "Well, now _that's_ over with," Aeris said and laughing evilly she took out her Cloud doll again.

--

Yuna took the dolls and ran to her room. "Yunie...uh, what are you doing?" Rinoa asked as she saw Yuna flying down the hall way.

"Nothing. I just, uh, nothing...um, BYE!" Yuna cried and locked herself in her room.

"This spring break vacation is getting everyone weirder and weirder," Rinoa sighed and continued walking. Yuna meanwhile set the dolls down and began to think.

"This is so hard. I'm sure of what I'm going to do but...I don't want to do it. If only I could hire someone to do it for me, like everything else I'm supposed to do and don't do!" Yuna cried helplessly. She took the Tidus doll and started to stroke its head in thought.

"Oh no," She suddenly said. "Here comes the _flashbacks_!" Yuna yelped and before they could come she chucked the doll away from her and covered her head.

"Hey, hey you!" Someone said. Yuna looked up and yelped again, for she saw a huge cloud. Not Cloud. A cloud.

"Ah! What _are _you?" Yuna cried and backed away against the wall.

"I'm your flash back. Now let me get in your head, and have you remember _all _the nice little memories you had with Tidus," Flash Back said and glided a little closer.

"No! No, no, back _away_!" Yuna cried and swatted it with a plunger. Haha. Plunger.

"It's ok Yuna, I'm not going to hurt you, I'm just a little cloud aren't I? Just let me...," Flash Back said but Yuna shook her head and whacked it again. "Hey! That hurt. I don't get paid enough for this," Flash Back grumbled and flew to the window.

"Yeah, that's right! No 'Tidus' memories will make _me_ change my mind! I've had it. I'm going to break up with him_ now_!" Yuna cried and tossing the plunger aside she marched out of the room.

"Whatever Toots. By the way, do you know where a certain 'Cloud Strife' resides here? Heh...I've got some juicy flash backs for _him_," Flash Back said.

"Two rooms down...and uh, don't bother me again!" Yuna ordered threateningly. But after Flash Back left she ran into the room whimpering. "Oh gee, I can't do this _now_...Ugh, besides, I haven't seen Tidus in days...who knows what sort of a state he's in now?" Yuna asked herself and hugged Foofy close to her.

--

Tidus sneezed. "Ugh...this whole fight is getting me sick, too?" Tidus sniffed.

"They say you sneeze when someone says something ill of you," Vincent remarked calmly while reading.

"Hmm...I bet it was Cloud," Tidus replied. Cloud was getting food for them, and since Vincent doesn't do anything all day he kept watch over Tidus. Vincent calmly flipped a page of his book and for a moment peered at Tidus who was laying there staring at the ceiling again. Vincent sighed lightly, and felt bad for him again even though Tidus wasn't really his favorite person in the whole world. Also, he's noticed Tidus hasn't really cried once since the time Yuna dumped all his stuff out. Not once. Which made Vincent wonder...if he was trying really hard not to. You know, to prove something to Yuna or something.

"You...don't have to you know," Vincent suddenly spoke up.

"Huh?" Tidus asked.

"I know you're trying to prove to Yuna that you're...more mature. And you're not crying or making a big deal about this to prove it to her. But have you thought about it? Why are you doing this? Yuna is the last person who actually deserves something at the moment...," Vincent replied.

"Vincent...you're like her _best friend_. You really feel this way about her?" Tidus asked turning around on his stomach.

"Well...I'm not saying I'm not her friend...but I tried to help her and it's no use. She gets whatever she wants, and here you are _still_ tied to her leash even though she let it go," Vincent replied.

"Huh?" Tidus asked.

Vincent looked sideways rolling his eyes then looked back at Tidus. "You still like her and worship her. Can't you see she's trying to get rid of you?" Vincent asked.

"I don't care. I still love her, she just can't see that," Tidus replied staring back up at the ceiling.

"Well, she sure doesn't love _you_ anymore...I'm just saying it's the truth. Cloud and I really don't want you to be all clingy to this. Can't you just let go? That's all she wants. If you like her still, why don't you do what she wants?" Vincent asked.

"Would _you _Vincent...let go so easily?" Tidus asked after a moment of silence.

"Depends-," Vincent started shifting his eyes but Tidus cut him off.

"Depends on what? How much you love her? If that's the case then I'm never letting go. I just...I just don't care," Tidus replied.

"Wow...Tidus goes Emo," Cloud noted coming in with some food and junk. Vincent dropped his book and walked out of the room. "What's with him?" Cloud asked chucking a bag of chips at Tidus's head.

"He just doesn't understand anything. We all think Vincent knows everything...but he actually doesn't," Tidus replied ripping open the bag.

"That's weird. I always thought he knew everything too. Oh well," Cloud said turning on the TV. Tidus heard Spanish voices and turned around.

"Cloud...what are you watching?" He asked.

"Shhh! Sophia is going to cheat on Rafael. And she doesn't know whose baby she's pregnant with, she's just guessing it's Angelo's but it's not, everyone knows it's Rafael's but she still wants to stay with Angelo and maybe some other guy," Cloud explained. Tidus inched away and ignored the fact that Cloud is watching soap operas...and that, well, he didn't know Spanish.

--

Yuna walked down the hall way for the fourth time...deciding whether or not to just get it over with. "Ooh, I just can't do this!" She wailed.

Rinoa was walking down the hall way and noticed Yuna. "Yunie, you doing ok? Ever since last time I saw you, you've been acting strange...," Rinoa said.

"Sorry...I'm just flipping out here. I was going to...you know, _break up with Tidus_," Yuna whispered.

Rinoa dropped her lollipop. "_What_?" She cried but Yuna put a hand to her mouth.

"You and Aeris are the only ones that know. Now, could you please keep it a secret? Anyway, I don't need help if that's what you're thinking. I just...need to find out the best time," Yuna said and slowly removed her hand from Rinoa's mouth.

"You like Vincent!" Rinoa said immediately. Yuna shrugged one shoulder. "Yunie!" She cried aghast.

"Will you be quiet already? Anyway, I think I'm just going to take a nap and sleep on it. I just know I can't get it over with now," Yuna said and went back to her room. Rinoa shook her head and went to her room to find a note from Squall.

"Oh...pfft, not again," She said after she read it. She sat on their bed, cradling her head in her hands. "I thought it was Spring Break," She continued miserably.

Cloud suddenly knocked on the door and Rinoa opened it. "Hey Rinny, Squall here?" Cloud asked.

"No, sorry. He just left. Another SeeD mission thingy majig whatever," Rinoa sighed.

"During Spring Break?" Cloud asked puzzled.

"Yeah, I know. Oh well, I think Squally's had enough of this vacation anyway...maybe some work will get him back on track, you know? But now I feel so lonely...," Rinoa replied.

"Oh well, in that case since Squall isn't here-," Cloud started and Rinoa glared at him. "Hey, wait 'till I finish! I finally got my ultimate birthday present. I got _Advent Children_ on DVD, and I was going to ask you and Squall to watch. You can still watch it, can't you?" Cloud asked.

"Oh, yeah, sure," Rinoa replied and followed Cloud to his room. They went in there and it seemed that Cloud had rounded up everyone again from Final Fantasy VII. They were all waiting in front of the TV.

"Cloud, I _really_ don't want to watch this," Aeris grumbled sitting near Vincent who also nodded.

"Hey, c'mon guys! I've been waiting for this to come out for like ever," Cloud replied.

"But my role in this movie stinks," Aeris snapped. "You don't even see all of my face half the time."

"I have the worst lines...," Vincent sighed and pretty soon everyone started grumbling about their roles in the movie.

"Hey guys, chill, chill! I know all your roles stunk...but, hey, look on the bright side. Mine didn't, hehe," Cloud said with a smirk and everyone groaned.

"Oh yeah, that makes us all feel so much better," Tifa snapped. Cloud had already put the DVD in, but he didn't press play.

"Hey Cloud, what's the hold up 'FOO?" Barret barked.

"Yeah, I wanna _see _it!" Yuffie cried.

"Hold on! I'm waiting for some people!" Cloud snapped.

Suddenly the door opened, and lo and behold, Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz come in. "Cloud!" Loz greets and Cloud gets up laughing.

"Guys!" Cloud cried.

"Yo, it's our Brother from another Mother man!" Kadaj greets and he and Cloud pound fists. Tifa nudged Aeris.

"Ooh Aeris, look it's Kadaj!" Tifa whispered and laughed.

"Shut up Tifa," Aeris replied turning red. Sephiroth glared at Kadaj as he winked at Aeris and sat down with the others to watch.

"Finally, alright, let's get this show on the road," Cloud says and presses play. Aeris could barely watch the movie, she kept thinking about Kadaj (Don't we all).

Those brilliant green eyes! That shiny, irresistable silver hair..., Aeris thought. Sephiroth then gets up and is about to leave.

"Sephiroth! Don't go walking out in the middle of the movie!" Cloud cries.

"I already _know_ what happens. And, why would I wanna watch a movie in which I finally come back to life, and I only last five minutes?" Sephiroth asks. Everyone hesitates at first then they start laughing and rolling around. Sephiroth growls and walks out.

"Hey, that wasn't nice!" Aeris scolds but everyone keeps laughing, then Cloud resumes the movie. Aeris stands up to go check if Sephiroth is ok.

"What are you doing?" Tifa hisses.

"I'm his therapist. I have to make sure he's alright," Aeris tells her. But as she walks someone takes her hand and Aeris stops, looking down at Kadaj.

"Hey, don't go. Let him be, he'll be fine," Kadaj says.

Aeris turns red, stammering, "Ok," and sits next to him. After the movie Kadaj and Aeris were walking outside and talking.

"I missed you, you know, after the movie was done," Kadaj says and smiles at Aeris.

"Oh...," Aeris replies and tugs on a strand of hair nervously.

"Here, I even got you this," Kadaj says and hands her a little wooden box. Aeris opened it and took out a pink Materia ball...orb...sphere...thing...Materia, ok?

"Wow, it's so pretty and shiny...and pink," Aeris says. Kinda like her pen.

"Isn't it? I thought of you when I found it. Just be sure not to, you know, have it with you when Yuffie is around," Kadaj grins and laughs.

"Oh, haha, yeah," Aeris smiles and puts it away.

"I smell materia!" Yuffie cries and breaks through the window. Everyone stares out the broken window and shrugs. Yuffie runs until she finds Aeris and Kadaj. Then she tackles Aeris.

"Ah!" Aeris cries.

"Give me it!" Yuffie demands, smacking Aeris's head into the dirt multiple times until she went unconscious.

"Hey, stop that!" Kadaj cries and smacks Yuffie on the head with...hmm...a plunger.

"Ow! Not a plunger!" Yuffies wails and bites Kadaj's arm.

"Ow!" He yelped and tried to shake her off but she was like a miniature dog holding on to his arm. Suddenly something black swoops out of nowhere and butts Yuffie in the head with his blade, then picks up Aeris. Kadaj rubs his arm and looks up at Sephiroth.

"Hey! Put Aeris down!" Kadaj growls.

"Why should I?" Sephiroth sneers, but Aeris wakes up in a daze and looks around.

"What happened?" She asks rubbing her head.

"Aeris-," Sephiroth starts but Kadaj cuts him off.

"Aeris Honey, you fell unconscious thanks to Yuffie. But it's ok I saved you," Kadaj declares proudly.

"Hey!" Sephiroth growls but Kadaj takes Aeris from his arms and scowls at Sephiroth.

"You should go now. I can take care of Aeris myself, you know," Kadaj says.

"Huh?" Aeris says faintly and looks at Sephiroth, but then out of _nowhere_ Kadaj gives her a kiss and her eyes grow wide and she turns red.

Sephiroth then looks at her, then at Kadaj, then looks down. "I see how it is," He says and sulks off.

"Sephiroth, wait!" Aeris cries but Kadaj shakes his head shushing her.

"It's ok Aeris. You won't have to see that maniac anymore," He says.

"Hey, let go of me! He's not some maniac!" Aeris says and jumps off, then stands in front of Kadaj angrily.

"Of course he is. What are you trying to say? Do you actually _like_ that old geezer?" Kadaj asks.

"What? He's not _old_! Well...at least I don't think so! He's a very sweet person, he's just very lonely inside and all he needs is someone to care for him a little more then anyone else so he can blossom into a beautiful healthy flower," Aeris says therapist like.

"What is it with you and_ flowers_?" Kadaj asks and Aeris frowns.

"I like flowers! And I like Sephiroth! If you have a problem with that, then you can just-," Aeris says crossing her arms but Kadaj gives her a terrorized look.

"Oh-oh GOD!" He gasps and falls down looking up at Aeris all scared like. "You really _do _like him!"

"Like I said, so what if I do? At least he isn't a jerk like you. Didn't I tell you back at the set of _Advent Children_ that it was just a fling? I'm not going to officially date you Kadaj! How many times do I have to tell you that? Thanks for the Materia and everything but...I think your brothers are waiting for you," Aeris huffed and walks away.

Yikes! Poor Kadaj. Wait, poor Sephy. Poor...poor Tidus! We forgot about him. I guess we'll have to wait to see what happens to him. Next time!


	13. Chapter 13: Sephiroth & Aeris Whoopee

Chapter 13: Sephiroth and Aeris "Whoopee"

--

Tifa was walking down the hallway when she saw Rinoa quietly slip away from Yuna's room, still in a short night gown. "Uh...Rinoa?" Tifa asked.

Rinoa jumped, and let out a sigh of relief on seeing who it was. "Oh Tifa, don't go scaring me like that! What are you doing roaming the hallways at this time of hour?" Rinoa wondered shifting her eyes.

"Well, first of all it's only ten at night, but I guess it's pretty late. Anyway, I need some money quick and I just remembered that Cloud owes me thirty gil. Actually, since I first met him, all together he owes me around 5,687 gil and 43 cents...but then again, whose counting?" Tifa asked miserably and made to start walking again.

"I think Cloud went out clubbing with Tidus and Irvine...sorry Tifa," Rinoa replied and Tifa stopped in her tracks.

"Oh...well, hey, I should've known. It_ is_ a Saturday," Tifa said.

"Uh...Tifa...it's Wednesday," Rinoa pointed out nervously.

"What difference does it make? Cloud will never change," Tifa replied emo like. Emo.  
Rinoa went over to her and gave her a hug. "Why don't you do what I always do?" Rinoa asked.

Tifa took a glance at Rinoa's night gown. "Um, no thanks," Tifa replied.

"No, silly! Why don't you _sing_ it out?" Rinoa asked.

"_Sing_?" Tifa repeated and Rinoa nodded. "Whatever do you mean Rinoa?" Tifa asked.

"Sing out your feelings. It feels really good, Yuna taught me how! Just try it. Speaking of Yuna by the way, I'm awfully worried about her...," Rinoa said tracing small circles on the ground with her foot.

"She's a wailing baby? She just broke up with Tidus. What do you expect?" Tifa replied crossing her arms.

"On the contrary, she's so casual about it, I'm dead worried! I suggested that I sleep over, you know? I'm her best friend and I wanted to be there in her time of need. But nothing happened! We had a little ice cream, watched _Titanic_, heck, we even watched _Scarface_, I thought it would scare the feelings out of her," Rinoa said.

"Uh, Rinoa, _Scarface_ isn't really a scary movie...," Tifa started.

"Well, all that blood sure does scare me! Anyway, as I was saying, _nada_! _Zip_! _Nothingness_! I expected her to break down suddenly at anytime, but she just finally got bored and said she'd go to sleep. I even suggested we talk about it but she replied, 'Why talk about it? It's already been done. I wanted it to happen and it did. Now everything is how I want to be, and I couldn't feel any more free or relieved. Then again I sure do hope Tidy--I mean Tidus-- is feeling at least a bit better...', and that's it! So you could say the only thing that changed was that she now addresses Tidus as Tidus now, like everyone else, and not 'Tidy'," Rinoa concluded shaking her head.

"Well, she's right. It's stereotyped that all girls should feel downright shitty and have really low self esteem after a break up and all that, but it's not true. I'm proud of Yuna for not caring less about it," Tifa replied.

"Tifa, it's a bad thing! If Yuna isn't letting it out, it's getting bottled in!" Rinoa cried. Tifa just shrugged a shoulder. "Oh, you're never any help! What use is it to talk to someone with zero experience in these things?" Rinoa snapped and stomped to her own room.

Tifa glared at her but just sighed. "She's right. I'm going to be alone forever," Tifa mumbled and slid against the wall. After some thought, she decided to take a walk outside and clear her mind.

--

Tifa walked to the courtyard, the night sky blossoming with stars. A slight breeze caused a fallen flower to glide across a stone bench, catching Tifa's eye. She walked over quietly to the flower, held it gently in her palm, and took a slow seat at the bench.

"If there's a prize... for rotten judgement," Tifa started to sing softly. "I guess I've already won that. No man is worth the aggravation...that's ancient history-been there! Done that!" Tifa cried flinging the flower aside and getting up.

_Who'd ya think you're kiddin' ?_

He's the Earth and Heaven to you!

Try to keep it hidden...

Honey, we can see right through you!

Girl, you can't conceal it,

We know how ya feel and who you're thinking of...!

"No chance, no way! I won't say it, no, no," Tifa protested to the singing voices that came out of nowhere. (Oh no...they're _back_!..._And they got Tifa_!)

Y_ou swoon, you sigh, why deny it, uh-oh! _

"It's too cliche, I won't say I'm in love!" Tifa sang back. She looked around, but not spotting anyone or anything she headed towards the other side of the courtyard, gazing at the flowers and shrubs, the elegant fountains and statues. "I thought my heart had learned its lesson...it feels so good when you start out. My head is screaming get a grip, Girl!" Tifa sang clutching her head, then sensing something behind her she turned around, but spotting nothing she continued, "Unless you're dying to _cry your heart out_! Ooh..."

_You keep on denying,_

Who you are and how you're feeling!

Baby, we're not buying,

Hon, we saw ya hit the ceiling!

Face it like a grown-up,

When ya gonna own up,

That ya got, GOT, got it bad!

"No chance, no way, I won't say it, no, no!" Tifa sang.

Give up, but give in, check that grin you're in love!

"This scene, won't play! I won't say I'm in love," Tifa was singing, and turning around she tried to spot the singers. Were they only in her head? Was she going crazy?

_You're doing flips! Read our lips, you're in love!_

"You're way off base, I won't say it!" Tifa sang pushing back a tree branch, but finding nothing. "Get off my case, I won't say it!" Tifa sang angrily and gave up, marching back towards the stone bench in frustration. When she sat down, she saw that same flower again.

_Girl don't be proud, it's ok you're in love!_

The voices sang again, and the flower magically flew into Tifa's hands. "Ooh," Tifa sang in surprise, then lay down across the bench, fiddling with the flower while smiling. "At least out loud...I won't say I'm in... lo-," Tifa started but an obnoxious voice interrupted.

"What's with all that racket? Can't a drunk fellow walk by in peace?" Cloud cried as he and Tidus walked through the courtyard.

"Cloud!" Tifa breathed sitting up as they passed her.

"Hey Tifa. What are you doing outside at his hour?" Tidus asked helping her off the bench.

"I-I was, I-um," Tifa stammered.

Cloud toyed with a toothpick between his teeth rolling his eyes. "She sleep walks. I found out myself, that one time in Band camp-," Cloud started but Tifa growled interrupting.

"Shut up Cloud! I don't sleep walk! Now leave me alone, please!" Tifa cried and turned to walk away.

"Tifa, wait," Tidus called out but Cloud shook his head.

"Let her go, she's always so _grumpy_," Cloud said.

"Haven't you noticed that's only when she's around you?" Tidus asked sarcastically and went after Tifa.

Cloud raised an eye brow but shrugged a shoulder. "That's not true," He said even though Tidus wasn't even there anymore. "Is it...?" Cloud asked himself looking up in thought.

"Tifa, don't go walking off at night, we're going back inside anyway," Tidus coaxed to Tifa who was angrily crossing her arms while sitting down at a bench.

"Cloud's a jerk, I can't stand him!" Tifa grumbled.

"I know, but ignore him. Come inside now, aren't you cold?" Tidus asked.

Tifa looked at him with a stern gaze but her features relaxed as she sighed. "I guess. But if Cloud utters one word-!"

"Then I'll kick him in the nuts myself. Save ya the dirty work," Tidus cut in winking at her. Tifa smiled and got up reluctantly.

"Could ya walk any slower? I'm freezing my ass off here!" Cloud cried at them and hugged himself. "Damn courtyard with all those stupid, dumb, woodland animals...," Cloud muttered as a Bambi like deer fawn came up and sniffed him gently. A squirrel hopped on his head and blue birds landed on his arms. "_Ah_! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Cloud cried. "_Help_! The Disney animals are _attacking_!" Tifa and Tidus just laughed as they watched Cloud struggle with the animated animals. When they finally decided to help, and the animals went away, Cloud growled angrily at his now ruined, stained, and ripped jacket. "I'm taking this to Aeris, she'll fix it up for me," Cloud muttered.

"Shouldn't Aeris be sleeping by now? Why can't you drop it off at her room tomorrow morning?" Tidus complained, eager to get to bed.

"I'll surprise her. She always did like a little Cloud intrusion. Follow me," Cloud said with a smirk, and he started to tip toe around the back of the main building. Tifa and Tidus shrugged at each other, then finally followed Cloud. While they were walking they suddenly heard crunching noises behind them. "Ah! Tifa, save me!" Cloud yelped leaping into Tifa's arms.

"You're such a chocobo Cloud," Tifa grumbled. "_And_ you're heavy." She dropped Cloud on the ground and he scrambled, shaking, to hide behind Tidus. He had every reason to be scared; a bush was shaking violently and the crunching noises were getting louder.

"Ok...I'm officially scared," Tidus announced.

"Wimps," Tifa muttered making her way over to the bush.

"No! Tifa! _Don't be a hero_!" Cloud cried after her. Tifa rolled her eyes at him and pushed the bush back. She gasped. It revealed Wakka violently gnawing on his toe nails. Tifa sighed with relief.

"Holy Mother of Sephiroth, Wakka! You scared the living life stream out of me," Tifa snapped, then turned to Cloud and Tidus. "The coast is clear guys, it's only Wakka eating his toe nails again."

Cloud cheered and posed. "The mystery was solved!" He exclaimed.

Wakka got up, dusting off his pants. "And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for those meddling kids and that stupid mutt," Wakka added, imitating a villain from the hit TV show _Scooby Doo_. They all laughed... then suddenly it died down.

"Um...what were you doing eating in the middle of the night behind a bush anyway, Wakka?" Tifa asked.

"It makes too much noise inside, and I didn't want to wake everyone up," Wakka shrugged.

"Yeah, well we're going to sneak up on Aeris so I can give her my jacket," Cloud said and gave a low evil laugh, then it got louder, and louder, until he was full on laughing maniacally.

Wakka raised an eyebrow. "Ok...why can't you do this tomorrow?" Wakka asked.

"My jacket is ruined _now_. I must have it sewed, cleaned, and fixed, you know...all those things girls do," Cloud said matter-of-factly.

"Well, Tifa's _right _here you know, she could have done it, because she _is _a _girl_. That way, not only can we go to bed now, but we wouldn't have to bother Aeris or get in trouble for sneaking up on her," Tidus said, not only wanting to go to bed as he said, but also knowing as well with the whole entire nation Tifa's mega crush on Cloud that she doesn't seem to do anything about. Hehe.

"Tifa's a girl?" Wakka questioned bewildered and Tifa glared at him. "No, I'm _serious_. She's a GIRL?" Wakka continued but everyone ignored him at first. I'm seriously wondering why Tifa hasn't punched him yet...?

Cloud suddenly turned his head sharply towards Tifa's chest. "Yeah," He replied, shrugging. Tifa's fists clenched, but Cloud didn't seem to notice. "Anyway, that wouldn't be any fun Tidy buddy! We gotta do things my way," Cloud said, pointing at himself.

"Let's just go and get this over with," Tifa grumbled. With another maniacal laugh, Cloud followed her. Tidus and Wakka shrugged at each other and followed them too.

--

Sephiroth tickled Aeris's neck with kisses, making her squeal and giggle. He grinned to himself, loving her taste. He's wondered throughout this whole adventure why he hasn't ever bothered to try this before. And he had never noticed how beautiful Aeris's body was; but he made up for that. He couldn't get enough.

Aeris was also having the time of her life, and I mean she hasn't had such a good time _doing this _for a long, long time! She hadn't done it so many times in her life, either. Where had all this sudden energy come from anyway? Aeris felt like a new woman. Sephiroth provided for her this new kind of ecstacy she was just addicted to instantly. She thought with lusciousness and amusement that what all the fans say about Sephiroth compensating with that lovely sword of his (oh, that she thought oh so sexy now!) Is _oh_ so not true. And I mean..._so _not true. This whole moment (or should I say moments) filled in all the therapy Aeris and Sephiroth needed put together, and it was the best therapy session she's _ever _had.

Sephiroth meanwhile was twirling a strand of her long hair around one finger, thinking about something interesting that they hadn't done yet. It was pretty hard, because they've spent quite an amount of hours in that room and there were endless possibilities they have already achieved (basically they've just about done it everywhere). Aeris looked sleepy while she was cooling off so Sephiroth thought maybe that was enough for today. There was always tomorrow. (oh God)

Now, for any kids sneaking into this story, never fear for this couple. You see, in Final Fantasy nobody gets like serious sexual diseases or anything, and barely anyone gets pregnant (except for that Lucrecia chick, but she's just plain stupid and BLIND I mean, seriously, if you had to choose between...ugh, never mind, I'm not going to get into that) _Anyway_, you see, there's a certain time when you can like have sex or not, and Aeris and Sephiroth were pretty ripe so yeah it's ok for them. Plus it's not like I'm going to ruin the whole plot line and get Aeris pregnant or something I mean like, what the fuck? That's totally messed up. It seems that's the only thing people think about when they think about sex, I mean, c'mon peeps it's like a natural and beautiful thing. Aeris really wasn't into the whole 'intercourse' thing, 'cause you know, JENOVA cells kinda give guys "some other" minor side effects (haha, get it, MINOR haha) so she was just like "You know what I'm going to focus on my job" and yeah, and with Sephiroth, he just plain is like the 40 year old virgin or whatever, like seriously. Not that he even had time to get deflowered, he was busy taking over or destroying the world or whatever he was trying to do (-doesn't follow Final Fantasy VII plot lines that well-) and he's like the bubble boy basically he was never...like, taught, or anything, the necessities of life or some shit like that. He had a pretty messed up childhood so, I can't really blame him, but anyway, it's perfectly fine that Aeris and him got their groove on so no like throwing up, or sending me complaint letters, or closing the window, or anything really drastic like that. The world's just one big juicy doughnut, man, and you just gotta fuck it! (Just kidding...but that'd be funny though. Haha)

And just so you know Aeris is like on the pill 'cause her period is like messed up, so yeah...and remember, the characters can do whatever they feel like doing and it doesn't matter who loves who! It's _love_ baby! I hope this chapter has taught you a valuable lesson. Even though you might be some fat chick and your husband is John Bestow, or some other fit guy, it doesn't matter. Doesn't matter if you're the old guy from Kentucky Fried Chicken and you're dating the McDonald's dude. Hey, man, love is love. If you're a flower girl who just did it with like the most evil dude in the Final Fantasy franchise and who even supposedly kills you in the game, who gives a shit! You readers, _seriously _need to stop judging people. It ain't right. You might not have realized it, but every chapter in this Jenova damned story has some valuable lessons, and if you were smart enough to find them, good for you. Good for you. And not only that, but we learned silver haired men _do_ have a big jack in the box (haha just kidding...but seriously though. Wait...where did Kadaj go anyway?...Hmm...) Erm, I'm probably scaring you enough, but I just wanted to make some things clear and to also lessen the tension because I know it's kinda hard to read steamy sex scenes, it just feels weird. I didn't even make my own stupid sex scene in my own damn story steamy enough 'cause just like you guys who can't read them, I can't type them. I don't want to get coal for Christmas! Ah! Besides, it wouldn't really make sense if they were doing it for the first time _now_...because like it's been hours since they first started...and everyone always knows the first time is the best. Haha. But we missed it so, yeah, it's too late. _So_ sorry...

--

Meanwhile.

--

"I'm hungry," Wakka announced twenty seconds later. Everyone groaned.

"You just had some toe nail, didn't you?" Tifa asked.

"If that's all you eat, what do you expect Wakka?" Tidus added.

"Hey! Toe nail is a good source of fiber. But I admit I should go on a better diet...," Wakka replied hanging his head.

"Shh! We're here," Cloud whispered and keeping low to the ground, he made his way over to Aeris's window, and positioned himself to throw open the shutters.

"Wait! Let's see what she's doing first," Tifa whispered and shoved Cloud to the ground. He fell over and a flower pot landed in his head.

"Guys! I can't get this off!" He yelped, tugging at the pot. Everyone shushed him impatiently and slowly, Tifa and Tidus opened the shutters for only a little bit.

"It's pretty dark. I can make out some candles. Is Aeris meditating?" Tidus asked Tifa.

"She probably would too," Tifa replied, but was cut short by a faint giggle.

"There's gotta be someone else in there!" Tidus whispered excitedly. They tried opening it a little farther, but any more and Aeris might notice. Tifa instead put her ear to the window and raised an eye brow.

"I can hear very low chatter, and she's giggling a little bit now and then. Plus the smell of incense is overpowering," Tifa reported waving a hand in front of her face.

"I wanna see!" Cloud complained, and tried to get the flower pot off his head by ramming it again and again against a tree.

"This all sounds familiar. By the looks of it, it's something Yuna and I would do if we were-," Tidus started but stopped abruptly. He went pale very suddenly and Tifa looked worried.

"Tidus, I know the breakup was hard, maybe not thinking about it-," Tifa started but Tidus shook his head.

"It's not that. It's-I-oh God," He said and his cheeks got bloated as if he would throw up.

"Tidus?" Tifa questioned, but suddenly Cloud came running at them.

"I got it off!" He finally cried, chunks of the pot stuck in his hair.

"This is boring, let's just _come in already_!" Wakka cried, and without warning he threw open the shutters, only to get a night shirt flown into his face. Again. Tifa and Tidus gasped. Well, Tidus tried, but he ended up throwing up finally. When he looked back up and processed the scene, he threw up again. Hehe.

"A-A-Aeris?" Tifa stammered out. Wakka slowly removed the night shirt and, shifting his eyes and making sure no one was looking, he ran off with it.

"Aeris! _Do you know what Cloud will say when he_-?" Tidus started after he threw up, but there was no need.

"I-I I _know_! Oh geez, leave me alone," Aeris suddenly cried, totally embarrassed. I'm sure you would be too, if suddenly everyone snuck up on you laying down right next to Sephiroth in bed! Yes, that's right, _in bed_! Completely nakey, ha-ha-ha-ha! (-Snort-)

Sephiroth had long since pulled on his boxers hurriedly which he found, surprisingly, in time. Since Aeris didn't even want to think about where all _her_ clothes were, she just wrapped the bed sheet around herself like a toga. Haha. Toga.

"What will I say when I what?" Cloud asked and saw the scene. Suddenly his jaw dropped and he started speaking in gibberish. "Da-da-da-duh-doo-doo-doo-da-dada," Cloud said.

"Shit, not Cloud! Oh, Mother," Sephiroth cried slapping his forehead. (Get it? Instead of 'Oh, brother'? Ha!)

"Cloud, please, let's get a hold of ourselves," Aeris said nervously, pulling the bed sheet up to her chin.

"Get...a _hold of myself_?" Cloud repeated, and suddenly his face turned very red. Tidus was tempted very much to crack an egg on it, so the yolk would fry up. Cloud jumped in the room, and started pacing back and forth while Aeris and Sephiroth watched him anxiously. Tifa and Tidus remained outside the window, watching him too. Cloud muttered to himself, would at times clutch his head in frustration, and to everyone's surprise he even started yanking on his precious hair! "This is _insane_!" Cloud cried. "Messed up! Wrong! This crosses the _line_!" Cloud feverishly paced back and forth, and even kicked a chair aside, then hopped one legged and grabbed the foot he kicked it with. "Ow, ow, ow!" Cloud cried then set his foot back down. He narrowed his eyes at Aeris and limped closer. "_You_!" He cried pointing at her.

"C-Cloud, please! Let's not be irrational-," Aeris started.

"Yeah Strife, cut her some slack," Sephiroth added.

"_You _don't say anything!" Cloud cried pointing at Sephiroth. "You _deflowered_ the_ flower_ girl!"

Aeris scoffed and rolled her eyes. As if she was a virgin before! She considered saying this to Cloud, but then this whole mess would tumble back to some things between them she better not mention...(No! The details! _I want details_, damn it!)

"How could you do this?" Cloud continued turning to Aeris. "Did I not love you enough? Was it our first date? C'mon what was it!" Cloud cried at Aeris.

Aeris raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about? We were never dating Cloud," Aeris snapped.

"Cloud's going loopy again," Tifa muttered in a cheerful mood. Tidus gave her a weird look and inched away a little. Tifa is actually surprisingly modest, considering her very frequent Pre Menstrual Syndrome mood swings and anger management problems from Cloud ignoring her all her life. So, she did not announce out loud the following thoughts. _Ha, you get what you deserve Aeris! You slut, bitch! Man, you're _totally_ getting whipped by Cloud now! I can't get enough of the look on your face! Now that Cloud is going to go all sad and Emo about you, I get him all to myself! This is twice as much better than the time the director thought it'd be _heartbreaking _and _intense_ to kill you off in the game! Oh, how Cloud bawled like a baby but I was there! And I'm here now! There's no stopping me now, I'm finally getting what I want!_ Tifa thought with triumph and amusement. Dreams _do _come true!

"How could you say that? Of course we were!" Cloud cried.

"That's so typical of you Cloud! You don't commit yourself at all, then when you get jealous of me with another guy you suddenly declare your love for me!" Aeris cried. Cloud suddenly got such a crazed look, Tidus expected foam to ooze out of his mouth. Tifa read his mind.

"He's been in a worse state...believe me," Tifa pointed out. Suddenly the door bursts open, and Rinoa, Yuna, and Vincent stroll in. Yuna and Rinoa gasp out loud, and Vincent goes paler than he usually is.

"Sephiroth!" Vincent cried. Sephiroth didn't reply; he just covered his head with the blanket and shrank.

"What the hell happened here?" Rinoa asked with surprise, but had the biggest grin on her face. Cloud didn't seem to notice the new guests. He and Aeris just stared at each other.

"I admit it isn't about _us_ anymore, Aeris! But you gotta face the truth! This is completely _awkward_ and it's never going to work!" Cloud cried.

"Shut up Cloud, you don't know anything about love, you're just a heartless blonde jerk who thinks you can date any girl you want because you're so famous! But I'm taken now, so there!" Aeris snapped, crossing her arms. You tell him, girlfriend!

"C'mon Cloud," Tifa said, and appeared by Cloud's side, taking his arm.

"Tifa! Help me! This can't go on, you guys can't date, this must _end_!" Cloud cried.

"Aw, how cute! It's like _Beauty and the Beast_!" Rinoa exclaimed happily. Everyone turned to look at her for a very long time before turning to Aeris and Cloud again. Aeris started to cry tears of frustration.

"Sephiroth," Vincent muttered all of sudden. Sephiroth didn't stir. "_Sephiroth_," Vincent spoke up again, in a menacing tone, with a fatherly edge. Sephiroth shamefully took the blanket down from his head.

"Yes?" Sephiroth asks.

"Come here."

"I don't wanna."

"Come..._here_...Sephiroth!"

"I don't _wanna_." But Sephiroth obeyed anyway, and walked over to Vincent wearing only Spider Man boxers. (There you go Alyssa, I wrote that in for ya. Gimme a hug at school!)

Vincent looked around at everyone in the room. "I'll be right back," He said calmly, then looked sternly at Sephiroth. "You're coming with me!" Vincent grumbled, and took Sephiroth by the ear.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow," Sephiroth said as Vincent dragged him out of the room. Yuna followed them, and left Rinoa shifting her eyes at everyone. Aeris was still sobbing in her hands.

"It's...too...awkward...," Cloud kept muttering over and over, twitching.

"C'mon Cloud," Tifa repeated, and managed to drag him out of the room. Rinoa went to Aeris and put her arm around her comfortingly.

Tidus was about to sit next to Aeris too, when Rinoa asked, "So...what was it like?"

Tidus turned around abruptly and sped out of the room. Aeris stopped crying to give her a glare, so Rinoa shut up. "Cloud's being a jerk," Aeris sobbed. "We _aren't _dating. I don't even know where he got the idea!"

Rinoa nodded. "I know, I know. But...out of all the guys..._Sephiroth_?" Rinoa asked bewildered.

Aeris sniffed and blew on Rinoa's handkerchief. "No one knows him like I do," Aeris finally replied.

"Cloud and everyone else might think it's totally awkward for you and Sephiroth to date, but I'll support ya all the way!" Rinoa said cheerfully with a burst of energy. Like everything _else_ she does or says.

"I'm going to_ kill _Cloud," Aeris suddenly said in a menacing voice, clenching her fist.

"Whoa! You sound like Sephiroth!" Rinoa cried inching away.

--

Meanwhile...

--

"How could you? Are you _insane_?" Vincent cried.

"Actually, yes, but that's beside the point," Sephiroth replied. Vincent glared him down something fierce, so he then proceeded to look at his feet embarrassed.

"Vincent, don't be so hard on him," Yuna said softly.

"No! He must learn!" Vincent cried.

"You're not the boss of me!" Sephiroth piped up angrily.

"Wanna bet?" Vincent challenged.

"I just wanna be with Aeris!" Sephiroth whined.

"Well, that's too bad, 'cause you can't!" Vincent replied.

"Why_ not_?" Sephiroth cried.

"Because! It's too awkward. You'll ruin the Final Fantasy series. Do you _really _want angry mobs of fans terrorizing you?" Vincent replied.

"I don't care! I'm leaving. I don't need you, I don't need anyone! I'm running away!" Sephiroth cried getting to his feet. If it meant being with Aeris, he couldn't give a shit. Aw! How sweet!

"Oh yeah?" Vincent wondered, and suddenly took out Sephiroth's Masamune sword.

Sephiroth's heart almost stopped. "My baby!" Sephiroth yelped with panic.

"Yes, your baby. You want it back? Then don't run away!" Vincent ordered.

"But-," Sephiroth started.

"This discussion is over. Go to your room," Vincent interrupted.

"My room? No way!" Sephiroth cried.

"That's it mister, you're grounded!" Vincent announced angrily.

Sephiroth stomped his foot. "I want my Masamune!" He whined.

"You'll get it back when you deserve it. Now march!" Vincent said, and Sephiroth left the room with his head down. Vincent tossed the Masamune away and massaged his temples. "Damn kids," Vincent muttered.

Yuna held his arm gently. "Do you think he'll sneak out?" Yuna asked quietly.

"If he does, I'll strangle him with my own two hands! I should have done that years ago anyway," Vincent replied.

"Vincent! What an awful thing to say!" Yuna gasped.

"Eh, it's no big deal. He wrote those exact words in my last birthday card," Vincent replied casually. Yuna raised an eyebrow, and just shrugged. Tifa came in then.

"Hey guys. I gave Cloud some sleeping medicine, so he's out cold. Sephiroth locked himself in his room, and I think Aeris did the same. Gosh, I feel so bad...," Tifa said scratching her head. Yeah right, liar.

"It's ok Tifa. I agree with Cloud, Sephiroth is not to date Aeris," Vincent announced.

"Yeah, but Aeris doesn't _want _to date Cloud," Tifa protested.

"She doesn't have too, but she can't date Sephiroth either," Vincent replied.

"Isn't that a little unfair?" Rinoa pointed out, coming in. Yeah, and a big ass discrimination!

"Not at all! We have to keep the Final Fantasy official rules in order. There can't be any cross dating! It's just wrong," Vincent said and walked to his own room.

Yuna looked sadly down at her shoes. So did Rinoa. Tifa looked at both of them. "You two ok? You look as if you just broke a rule," Tifa said, but just shrugged and walked to her own room. Yuna and Rinoa instead walked together to go see Aeris.

"She's probably a wreck. But someone has to tell her," Rinoa whispered.

"Tell her what?" Yuna asked.

"Cloud and Vincent are powerful people to both Aeris and Sephiroth. If they don't want them to date, then it's going to be hard for them to ever pull if off. The best thing to do is well...to not have them see each other," Rinoa explained.

"That's awful!" Yuna cried.

"Yeah, I know. Isn't it cute though? It's like _Romeo and Juliet_!" Rinoa exclaimed cheerfully. Yuna shook her head to shake off Rinoa's weirdness, and they slowly opened the door to Aeris's room. She had clothes on again, and was wearing an extra large t-shirt as pajamas. She had mascara running down her face from crying and was hugging a pillow to herself.

"Aeris?" Rinoa asked as she and Yuna made their way over.

"What do you guys want?" Aeris grumbled.

"We're so sorry about the whole thing. But you know how Cloud is, and we obviously just found out how Vincent is...," Rinoa said.

"What's _that _supposed to mean?" Yuna snapped crossing her arms.

Aeris began crying lightly again and sniffed. Rinoa put her arm around Aeris to comfort her again. "I just don't get it. I'm supposed to be dead, aren't I? And so is Sephiroth. We can date whoever we want. Neither the Final Fantasy contract, nor Cloud and Vincent have any power over us!" Aeris sniffed.

"I know, but you're still alive in the real world, and so is Sephiroth. Imagine the talk and gossip from all the news. It's going to be terrible," Yuna said. Aeris sobbed again.

"But...you like Vincent. No one is stopping you! And you, Rinoa, you like-," Aeris started but Rinoa clapped her hand over Aeris's mouth.

"No one! Haha," Rinoa laughed nervously.

"Is it really that obvious?" Yuna murmured to herself, wondering how Aeris knew she liked Vincent. Shaking her head, she then wondered, "What ever happened to Squall?"

"He's away again...but I think we're gonna end things anyway. It's about time, our relationship just keeps going downhill," Rinoa replied sadly. What? No, Rinoa! Then again I don't think Squall ever liked you anyway...

"Will I ever be able to see Sephiroth again?" Aeris asked quietly after awhile. Rinoa and Yuna looked at each other.

"I'm afraid...not," Rinoa said.

"What?" Aeris yelped.

"Aeris, I know you like him, but it's for the best," Yuna said as Aeris got up and made her way over to her window.

"I don't only just _like_ him Yuna. There's so much more...," Aeris replied placing her hand on the window. "It's the first time...in a very long time...that another person actually knows how to look inside and know the real me. The same goes for Sephiroth, I mean, he's probably _never_ had anyone be so close to him...and that's just what he needed all along."

"You mean there's more to the grumpy old Sephy whose always threatening to kill us?" Rinoa asked thoughtfully.

Aeris looked down with a small smile. "Of course. He just acts that way to cover his real feelings. Inside was just a sad, lonely little Sephiroth, who needed someone to look into him at last," Aeris replied turning back around.

"Wow Aeris...that's beautiful," Yuna murmured writing the words down on her hand for future use.

"It stinks you can't ever see him again," Rinoa pointed out bluntly.

"Yeah. I guess it does," Aeris replied quietly.

--

It rained all night. All Aeris could do was just lay down, eyes wide open, and listen to the heavy rain. When she heard something against her window, she just turned over and thought she imagined it. But then she heard it again and her eyes flew open. "I'm going crazy," Aeris muttered, but got out of bed all the same to see what was up. She unlocked the window (she kept it locked now just in case) and threw open the shutters.

The rain was so heavy that Aeris could barely see outside, but she could just barely make out an outline of some lone figure. "Hello...?" Aeris called softly.

"Aeris," Sephiroth replied, and moved closer to the window. Aeris was in shock, and didn't speak for a moment. Sephiroth merely caressed her face lightly with his damp fingertips.

"Why are you out here in the _rain_?" Aeris asked taking his hand.

"It was the perfect time, so they wouldn't catch me. They hired Wakka to guard my room. I had to come see you...," Sephiroth replied.

"Get out of the rain though, please. You're all wet! You'll catch a cold!" Aeris warned.

Sephiroth merely chuckled. "Don't worry, I never get sick. Besides, I'll be off in a second. I have to go back before they check in on me," Sephiroth replied. He stood there holding hands with Aeris for a long time, while the rain came down on him. But he didn't care. Aeris then swung her legs over outside, and climbed down. She got soaked instantly, but she just hugged Sephiroth tightly to keep the cold away. "Meet me out here as the sun rises," Sephiroth whispered, while stroking her wet hair.

"What?" Aeris asked, raising her head from his shoulder and looking at him.

"Meet me out here. You won't regret it," Sephiroth said over the rain, kissing her quickly. He then made to run off, but before doing so, he turned to Aeris one last time. "You better get inside. I don't want you catching a cold," He warned.

Aeris laughed. "Don't worry. I never get sick either," Aeris replied smiling. Sephiroth smiled too; then he took off. Aeris watched him go until she could hardly see him anymore. Then, she got inside her room again, drenching wet. For the heck of it, she gave off a hearty laugh. By looking at her now you couldn't tell. But she felt like the happiest person in the world, standing there, freezing and soaking wet.

--

Vincent heard a knock on the door to his room. He got up reluctantly, and walked over to it. Yuna stood outside. "Yuna? What do you want at this time of hour?" Vincent asked rubbing his eyes.

Yuna raised an eyebrow. "Vincent, please. It's noon. Besides, I have some bad news...," Yuna said and walked inside.

"Let me guess. Sephiroth took off," Vincent said sitting on his bed, running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, but he took Aeris with him," Yuna added carefully.

"_What_?" Vincent yelped.

"I know. Cloud and Tidus are looking around town, but I don't know if they'll find them. Cloud's _really_ determined to find Aeris," Yuna said.

"He should be! And he should have woken me up, that idiot. I'm going to look for Sephiroth myself, no one knows that kid better then I do anyway," Vincent said slipping his cloak on.

"Can I come with?" Yuna asked. Vincent shrugged a shoulder and left the room. Yuna took that as a yes, and followed. They made their way outside, but Vincent didn't head towards the parking lot. "We're not hopping in your Bat mobile?" Yuna joked.

"No," Vincent replied flatly, and took off in the direction of the forest. Yuna quickly followed. See, Vincent thought Sephiroth had taken off with Aeris in the forest, but Sephiroth was smarter than that! He was right under their noses. Or should I say on top...? The thing is, Sephiroth and Aeris were hiding on the roof.

"Sephiroth, how long do we stay up here?" Aeris asked holding his hand.

"Just as soon as they give up, and stop looking. Then we can leave to anywhere we want. Anywhere _you_ want," Sephiroth replied smiling at her.

"But I don't want to leave them...why can't we talk it out?" Aeris wondered, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"Because, Cloud can't do that. We'll either have to sneak away from him or fight him out about it, there's no other way to get something through his thick head," Sephiroth grumbled. "Besides, Aeris my love, sometimes you just can't talk to people. That's when you kill them instead. _Then_ they get the point," Sephiroth added matter-of-factly.

Aeris looked up at him in shock. "Sephiroth! I thought all that therapy cured you of your killing fever," Aeris said alarmed.

"Oh, it did. A little. But Cloud just had to go and make me mad again, so I must attempt to kill him. Again. But this time I won't lose, and this time Vincent won't put away my Masamune and put me on a Time Out-," Sephiroth started but stopped abruptly, then cleared his throat. "I mean, yes, Cloud must die," Sephiroth continued casually as if he was explaining to a small child the wonders and various joys of life.

"I'm not dating Cloud, nor do I have any feelings of that sort anymore for him either, but we're still friends. I don't want him to just _die_," Aeris protested.

"He broke your heart and threatened to take you away from me," Sephiroth explained bluntly. "Therefore he must be punished."

"Can't it just be a duel?" Aeris argued.

"I don't know...what if he tries to break us up again, huh? What about that?" Sephiroth says.

"He won't, Sephiroth. He's dated _a lot_ of girls and has had various flings, I know that better than anyone else, but he doesn't know what true love means yet. Don't blame his stupid little mind," Aeris explained, fiddling with a strand of Sephiroth's hair.

"Ok...Fine. Whatever," Sephiroth replied disappointed.

"Thanks," Aeris smiled sweetly at him, and kissed his cheek.

As if on cue, Cloud and everyone else suddenly came outside. "We've looked everywhere. They have run away, Cloud, get over it!" Tifa growled.

"I must find them! They can't date, they can't, I tell ya!" Cloud cried for the millionth time.

"Cloud, if they really love each other, let them go," Zell said softly patting Cloud's arm.

"What do _you _know about love, you hotdog eating moron?" Cloud snapped. Zell gasped dramatically and shielded Lucy, the hotdog, from Cloud.

"Hey look! They're up there!" Wakka suddenly cried. Aeris gasped and Sephiroth cursed.

"Sephiroth! Come down here and _face me like a man_!" Cloud cried, pulling his sword out from behind his back. Uh oh, I smell a macho fight coming on!

"Sephiroth-," Aeris started with a pleading look, and grabbed his arm.

"He's asking for it Aeris," Sephiroth muttered clenching his fist.

"Remember your therapy!" Aeris tried, but it didn't work. Sephiroth walked up to the edge and glared down at Cloud.

"You want to fight, pretty boy? Then come on up here! No need for _me_ to come down there for _you_," Sephiroth called.

Cloud chuckled. "Things never change, do they Sephiroth? You're just as lazy as ever," Cloud replied. Suddenly, he dramatically handed Tifa his hair gel. Tifa gasped softly. "Take care of it Tifa," Cloud said solemnly without looking at her. "I know you will."

"Oh, yes! I will," Tifa reassured him, hugging the bottle as she looked up at Cloud dreamily.

Cloud nodded and walked to the building, then proceeded to climb up it.

"Sephiroth, do something! Cloud can't climb for beans!" Aeris cried.

"What do _you _care for Aeris?" Tifa snapped up at her. Aeris glared at Tifa.

"Let him come here and fight me. You know he'll lose, so maybe then he'll learn to leave us alone," Sephiroth said to Aeris.

"Just...be careful. Don't hit too hard. Don't kill each other unless you absolutely _must_...," Aeris started wringing her hands.

"You can't set rules to a duel between sworn enemies, Aeris," Cloud said as he finally came up on the roof, red in the face and gasping for breath.

"He's right my little flower, you must stay out of it," Sephiroth agreed, turning to Aeris. With a quick kiss he pushed her softly out of the way.

"Quite confident about this aren't we?" Cloud grumbled watching them.

"Oh, Cloud! If you weren't such a stubborn jerk this wouldn't even be taking place!" Aeris replied angrily to him.

"_Don't yell at Cloud_!" Tifa shouted out of nowhere through a megaphone.

"Ooh, can I try? I wanna say somethin'!" Zell cried hopping up and down, trying to reach Tifa's megaphone.

"No Zell, back off!" Tifa cried and shoved him. Zell grumbled and crawled away to pay attention to something else.

--

"What has that idiot gotten himself into now?" Vincent asked as he and Yuna made their way over to everyone else.

"Looks like he's fighting with Cloud!...Again!" Yuna cried in shock.

"Hotdogs! Burgers! Get your Spira Sprites!" Tidus was yelling out pushing a snack cart past them. "Don't watch the big fight with an empty tummy!" Yuna gave him a weird look and Vincent shook his head at the random scene that just so happened to interrupt them.

"_I say Aeris should leave the roof_!" Tifa yelled through the megaphone. Cloud and Sephiroth both turned to Aeris at the same time.

"Um, I...I don't want to leave!" Aeris cried nervously.

"Sweetpea, you must leave...not because Tifa said it, but well, it's too dangerous up here," Sephiroth said calmly.

"Tifa's smart!" Cloud cut in, shifting his eyes.

"Fine, fine," Aeris said ignoring Cloud, and made her way slowly down from the building.

"_Ha-ha-ha! In your face_!" Tifa cried through the megaphone right in Aeris's ear, causing her braid to stick straight up.

"Oh no!" Aeris yelled suddenly. "I've gone deaf!" Seriously, Aeris couldn't hear a word or sound as everyone surrounded her and started talking.

"No-o-o-o-o!" Sephiroth cried.

"Don't go 'No-o-o-o-o-o!'-ing me Sephiroth! Whether Aeris is deaf or not, we're continuing this fight!...Right after the commercials!" Cloud cried.

And sadly yes, Cloud and Sephiroth are fighting...Aeris is deaf...and Tifa has a deadly megaphone. And unfortunately, it's commercial break, so...until the commercial ends! Bye everyone! Review please and try not to yell at me _too_ much!

Music Credit: "I Won't Say I'm In Love" - Hercules, the movie.


	14. Chapter 14: The Big Fight

Chapter 14: The Big Fight

--

"Aha! The commercial has ended! Now we fight!" Cloud cried swishing his blade.

Sephiroth looked down at Aeris worriedly, but he knew he had to finish off Cloud first. "Alright pretty boy! Let's go!" Sephiroth cried, then he and Cloud began to circle each other.

"Stop! Somebody make them stop!" Aeris yelled poking at her ears desperately.

"Tifa, why did you have to go and make Aeris deaf?" Rinoa cried.

"It was an accident!" Tifa snapped but still held the megaphone protectively in her arms.

Suddenly Cloud made a move towards Sephiroth who backed away, so Cloud got a Missed. "Damn you!" Cloud cried shaking his fist.

"What's happening?" Aeris yelled and Rinoa got a good idea.

"Here! I still have the deck of cards I used to train Squall with," She said.

"_What_?!" Aeris cried. Rinoa took out a colorful box with the word 'Squall' written on it in kindergarden crayon handwriting, and pulled a card from it. She showed it to Aeris. Aeris looked at the card, which had a picture of a lightning bolt, and the word under reading 'Shocked!'. Aeris turned back to the fight and put a shocked look on her face.

"Why is Aeris shocked? She should be happy I dodged that move!" Sephiroth cried out suddenly.

"Ooh! My bad," Rinoa apologized and held up a 'Happy!' card to Aeris. For some reason there were bite marks on it, but Aeris looked happy and jumped up and down.

Sephiroth struck at Cloud's leg, and Cloud cried out in pain. "Muahahaha!" Sephiroth laughed. Aeris continued looking happy, but then Cloud used a potion on himself and could stand up again. Rinoa held up a card that had a picture of an angry pepper, with the word under it 'Angry!'. Aeris put on a completely furious face.

They continued back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Sephiroth would hit Cloud, or Cloud would hit Sephiroth, but then they'd just heal themselves again.

"Boo! Final Fantasy VII fighting is _boring_!" Tidus cried out. Both Sephiroth and Cloud glared down at Tidus, then back at each other.

Suddenly Kenshin ran through the crowd yelling, "_Violence isn't the answer_!"

Vincent took his gun out to shoot him (who could say such a thing!?) But Yuna put his arm down. "Vincent! You can't shoot Kenshin! He's the best anime character ever!" Yuna protested.

"Fine," Vincent grumbled.

--

Meanwhile.

--

Sephiroth didn't make a move when it was his turn. He thought on what he should do. He wasn't going to hurt Cloud, no, that was stupid for Cloud would heal himself again. He thought of Cloud's weaknesses...and aha! Sephiroth would go for his hair. Just one swish of his sword and as a blonde spike of Cloud's falls lightly on the roof, Cloud will give up all hope! He ran to Cloud, dodged his block attack, and went up behind him to slice his hair.

But as his sword came down Cloud ducked and rolled out of the way. "Going for my hair eh?! That was so obvious a monkey could've seen it! I'll only repeat this once, so listen carefully! _No one goes for Cloud Strife's hair!_" Cloud cried.

Sephiroth muttered under his breath and didn't reply. He looked around then down at Aeris, her eyes locked on him. He didn't want to fight Cloud anymore, it was too pointless. Either Final Fantasy VII got a new battle system or he'd just flee.

To everyone's surprise, Sephiroth merely went up to Cloud, and swished his blade back and forth really fast. Cloud gasped and looked down as his pants fell to his feet, revealing his underwear.

Sephiroth then leaped down from the roof and took Aeris by her hand.

"Hey! Where do you think you're going?" Cloud cried angrily and took a step forward, but fell on his face when he tripped over his pants.

"I'm running away with Aeris to find a treatment for her ears! After that, were going to buy you a new pair of underwear! _Then_ after that, I'm going to _take over the world_!" Sephiroth cried evilly.

Aeris didn't hear what he said, so she merely cried out, "What he said!"

Everyone gasped. Would Aeris really succumb to a life of crime and evil?

Sephiroth looked at Aeris in surprise, but a smile stole over his lips shortly after that. Aeris guessed it was a good thing she said that, if it made Sephiroth happy. They ran off hand in hand until they disappeared in the parking lot, to run away even more after that, and maybe come back later to_ take over the world! _

"Are they really going to take over the world?" Rinoa asked timidly twisting a strand of hair around her finger.

"Are they really going to just go off like that?" Yuna wondered turning to Vincent.

"Don't look at me, who knows what's going on in Sephiroth's mind," Vincent replied.

"You do," Yuna pointed out and Vincent sweat dropped.

"Well, I mean, yeah...but not now I don't," Vincent replied.

Tifa was sad she didn't have to use her megaphone anymore, so she gave it to Zell as an early birthday present. "Yay!" Zell cried and hugged Tifa's legs.

"Zell, let go of me!" Tifa snapped so he cowered away with Lucy and his newly attained friend, Jeff, the megaphone.

Tifa went up to Cloud who had just climbed down from the roof, still in his underwear. "Cloud, Cloud! Look, I still have your hair gel...," Tifa said softly and handed it to him.

"Oh, gee, thanks! Like that'll help me at the moment," Cloud grumbled snatching the gel angrily and stomping away. Tifa frowned wondered if she did something wrong.

"Alright, well, I guess the party's over," Tidus announced and started to walk off when Rinoa took his hand.

"Hey you, wait up," She giggled.

"Uh, Rinoa...Hey," Tidus replied, shifting his eyes and making sure Yuna wasn't looking at him.

"What a fight between Cloud and Sephiroth, huh? I wonder where Sephy went with Aeris!" Rinoa wondered smiling while still holding Tidus's hand.

"Um, Rinoa, hey look," Tidus said letting go of her hand and looking at her nervously.

"What?" She asked worried.

"I kinda have to go check up on Cloud, so can we do this later...? Yeah, thanks, you're a doll," Tidus said hastily and ran away.

Rinoa pouted. "What's gotten into him?" Rinoa wondered out loud.

"Who?" Yuna asked coming up right beside her and making Rinoa jump five feet.

"Whoa, Yunie, don't sneak up on me like that! Anyway, I was just wondering about Tidus...He's acting like he doesn't want to be seen with me," Rinoa explained.

"What do you mean 'seen' with you? Are you guys dating?" Yuna suddenly demanded in a bitchy tone.

"N-N-No...No that's not it," Rinoa laughed nervously drumming her fingers together.

"Oh ok, good!" Yuna cried, cheerful all of a sudden with a strange, sweet smile. "Because, you _do_ know that if you go as far as merely having _feelings_ for him, you'll be breaking Girl Code and you know I'll never forgive you..."

Rinoa laughed a little too enthusiastically. "Yuna! Don't go acting stupid, you know I'm...I'm not like that, I'd _never_ break Girl Code!" Rinoa cried nervously. Yuna smiled at her once more, and went on her way. "_Oy Vey_," Rinoa sighed and decided to go the hotel's spa or something, to relieve some stress.

--

After Aeris got her hearing medicine and could hear again, she walked hand in hand out of the Hearing Specialty place with Sephiroth. "So you can hear just fine now, sweet pea?" Sephiroth asked.

"Oh yes, and finally too!" Aeris replied. They went to a bench and sat down, quietly gazing around their surroundings.

"So...um, there's something I need to tell you real quick...," Sephiroth said after awhile, turning to Aeris.

"Yeah, sweetie?" Aeris asked happily.

"Well, see, around the time that you were deaf...I kinda mentioned something...and you uh, 'agreed'...so I was wondering if that plan was still on...?" Sephiroth asked.

Aeris looked at him puzzled. "What was it that you mentioned?" Aeris asked.

Sephiroth shrugged one shoulder casually. "Oh, just a little something..._Like taking over the world with me_!" Hesuddenly cried out.

Aeris gasped. "I...I-," Aeris started.

"You said you would!" Sephiroth interrupted.

"I was deaf Sephiroth, I didn't know what you were saying! I-I can't take over the _world_...," Aeris replied.

"Oh, sure you can! It's easy and it'll be fun, c'mon, what do you say?" Sephiroth proposed energetically.

Aeris bit on a nail in thought, and wasn't sure at all. She thought Sephiroth had changed. Aeris then got up, her mind made up. "No!" She shouted.

"What?" Sephiroth yelped meekly.

"No! I'm sick of everyone treating me like a door mat, and I'm going to do what_ I_ wanna do! I'm _not_ going to take over the world, Sephiroth, I just won't!" Aeris cried and ran off.

"Aeris!" Sephiroth cried in return, frustrated. He grumbled to himself and stabbed the dirt angrily with his blade.

Aeris meanwhile was running off while crying (Drama queen, much?). "I can't believe him. Expecting me to be just like him! What was all that therapy for anyway, then? Oh, oh, oh...," Aeris sniffled and cried sadly. She walked to a tree and slumped against it, and watched as snow lightly fell all around her (please...don't ask me why it's snowing during Spring Break...just go with it!). She heard the twitter of birds, and heard Sephiroth's footsteps a moment later.

"Aeris? Oh, Aeris, c'mon...," He called out.

Aeris forced herself to stay rooted to the spot, hidden from him behind the tree. Sephiroth walked over to a group of birds hopping around the snow, and he got some sun flower seeds from his pocket (why Sephiroth has sunflower seeds in his pocket, don't ask me that either). He bent down and offered his hand. The birds twittered happily, but when they looked up at him they squeaked in fear and ran away. Sephiroth frowned and crawled closer to them on his knees, determined to have those damn birds eat from his hand.

Aeris was puzzling over the silence, so she turned around briefly to see what he was doing. She clutched at her poor heart at the sight and turned back around. Sephiroth was offering food to birds without using violence! He was being generous and nice. Now Aeris got suddenly reminded why she loved him so much. She stood up and continued to watch Sephiroth (pathetically) try to feed the birdies.

"_There's something sweet... and almost kind, but he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined! And now he's dear, and so I'm sure, I wonder why I didn't see it there before!_" Aeris sang softly.

Sephiroth caught Aeris looking at him from the corner of his eye, and focused on feeding a bird. "_She glanced this way... I thought I saw. No it can't be, I'll just ignore, but then she's never looked at me that way before..._," Sephiroth muttered.

Aeris saw him flicker his eyes over her so she quickly turned around. _"New and a bit alarming... Who'd have ever thought that this could be? True, that he is no Prince Charming... But there's something in him that I simply didn't see_," Aeris continued and finally decided to go back.

"Well, who'd have thought?" Said an owl.

"Well bless my soul!" Replied the beaver next to it.

"Well, who'd have known?" A horse asked.

"Well who indeed!" Agreed a squirrel.

"And who'd have guessed that they'd come together on their own?" Replied a rabbit.

"It's so peculiar...let's wait and see," The owl said nodding.

"We'll wait and see, a few moments more," The horse replied, "There may be something there that wasn't there before!"

Aeris ignored the suddenly able to sing animals and walked over to Sephiroth, bending down next to him and planting a kiss on his cheek.

"Oh, Aeris! Where'd you come from?" Sephiroth asked shifting his eyes.

"Silly," Aeris replied laughing and extended Sephiroth's hand in hers with the seeds in them.

A small blue bird walked forward to them, away from the others, who knew better and flew away. "It's coming!" Sephiroth cried excitedly. Well, it was, then Sephiroth cried out so the bird squeaked and started to trot off.

"Oh it's ok Sephy, next time we'll-," Aeris started humbly, making to turn around, but it was too late.

Sephiroth shook with anger and his hair flared up. "_Eat the seeds you stupid bird_!" He cried out and without thinking took his blade out and slashed it through the air. There was a flutter of feathers and a bird scream, and Aeris gasped.

"Sephiroth!" She cried.

Suddenly Sephy came back to normal and looked around. "Oh, um...oops?" Sephiroth shrugged. Aeris kneeled down by the injured birdie and took it in her hands.

"It's still alive!" She announced happily.

"Good...Now lets-," Sephiroth started but Aeris was walking away with it. "Hey! Where are you going?!" Sephiroth cried.

"I'm going to heal it, you stay there!" Aeris ordered and quickly patched up the little bird. Sephiroth scratched the back of his neck and looked around impatiently until Aeris finally came back and set the little bird on the snow, one wing bandaged, an eye patch over one eye, and his good wing holding a small wooden crutch. Aeris ran over to Sephiroth and bent down again.

"C'mon birdie, you can do it! C'mon, try to walk, come towards me!" Aeris called out sweetly, smiling. Sephiroth helped and they tried to coax the bird towards them. The birdie twittered and shifted on his crutch. He tried walking and slowly maneuvered its way toward them. "There you go! C'mon, a little farther!" Aeris cried happily.

The birdie was about to take another step when _vwam_! _Boom_! A truck came out of_ nowhere_ and ran it over. Aeris and Sephiroth's smiles dropped, and they watched the truck zoom by.

"Oh, birdie!" Aeris cried and hid her face on Sephiroth's shoulder.

"Wait!" Sephiroth called out, and sure enough there was a faint little "tweet".

Aeris and Sephiroth ran to the road and saw a twitching blue birdie covered by a tire track and its crutch broken in two beside him. "Sephy we have to help it!" Aeris wailed and picked it up.

"Oi...alright let's go," Sephiroth said and they took Birdie to the hospital.

--

Sephiroth paced feverishly down the aisle and back while Aeris nervously bit her nails while sitting down. Finally, a nurse came and went up to Sephiroth.

"Are you relatives of Birdie's?" She asked in a bored voice.

"Yeah, sure, whatever, is he ok?!" Sephiroth asked shaking the nurse by the shoulders.

"Please! He's all we've got!" Aeris bawled.

"Follow me," The nurse said bored again and led them to a room.

"Birdie!" Aeris called running inside to the little blue bird, barely visible under all those heavy blankets, and hooked up to all sorts of different machinery. The bird gave out a faint tweet from his heavily bandaged head and Aeris stroked its arm gently. "Oh Sephiroth, come look at him!" Aeris called.

"Coming," Sephiroth replied and quickly turned around, causing, unfortunately may I add, for his sword to swoop with him and easily cut all the chords hooked up to the machines and Birdie.

"Birdie!" Aeris cried as the bird gave out a loud gasp of air then fainted.

"Oops," Sephiroth muttered as Aeris frantically tried to bring it back to life.

"_Live_!" She cried, pushing on his little chest.

"Clear!" Sephiroth cried and tried to shock Birdie back to life but it didn't work. The heart monitor was beeping slower and slower.

"Birdie! Noooo!" Aeris wailed.

"Aeris, get a hold of yourself, we could always have more," Sephiroth grumbled.

"But he was _special_!" Aeris sniffed. Suddenly the monitor came at a normal beeping and Birdie woke up. "Birdie! Oh thank goodness!" Aeris cried and hugged it.

"What's going on in here?!" The nurse suddenly asked, coming by.

"Our birdie lives!" Aeris declared.

The nurse went up to the bird who looked as if it was trying to say something. "Res...training...order...," Birdie gasped out and pointed weakly at Sephiroth and Aeris who grinned nervously.

"Get out of this hospital! You are never to see Birdie again!" The nurse ordered. Aeris and Sephiroth hung their heads and left.

Later, Sephiroth and Aeris sat at a bench holding hands, going through miserably all the moments they had together with Birdie. "I'm going to miss him. So, so, so much," Aeris sniffed.

"Hey, cheer up," Sephiroth said and Aeris looked up at him.

"How?" She asked.

Sephiroth smiled at her slyly. "Let's have another," He suggested, his eyebrows going up and down. (Oh God...)

--

Music Credit: I don't know the title, but anyway, it's from _Beauty and the Beast_. I bet you were all struggling to remember where you've heard that before!

Note: Tune in next time, because guess what! One of my favorite chapters. Hell yeah!


	15. Chapter 15: Lifestyles of the Rich And

Chapter 15: Lifestyles of the Rich and Bitchy

--

A black shiny limo made its way in front of the hotel. Zell and Wakka were playing cards on the grass and looked up, surprised.

"Who's that?" Zell whispered, but Wakka only shrugged.

A limo driver came out of the front and had to walk all the way to the back, which was a long way, and open the very last door where whoever was inside was to come out. After catching a breath from all that walking to the end of the limo, the driver straightened up and opened the door.

A gleaming, leather, mahogany brown boot delicately made its way out, and supported fine sleek legs followed by a tan petite body, all of which a head finally lay upon, sporting a fine head of sleek, waist long light brown hair. Lenne, wearing her usual songstress outfit but now with big expensive Gucci sunglasses and swinging a Louis Vuitton at her side, stepped out and strutted towards the entrance, walking like a model. Even the way she chewed her gum seemed professional, and even though Zell and Wakka were used to this kinda of behavior from Yuna, their jaws dropped anyway.

But, followed shortly after her came Shuyin, struggling to keep up. He bared his teeth at Zell and Wakka who whimpered away and hid behind the bushes, still watching from a safe distance the two newcomers make their way inside. Lenne waited for Shuyin to open the door for her, then she made her way impatiently inside. If you thought Yuna was the snobbiest, most selfish, spoiled, drama queen, bitchy, self centered character in this story, you thought wrong. Here walked in someone even more of a snob, and selfish, spoiled, drama queen acting, bitchy, self centered, and totally pop star material. Yup, I'm talking about Lenne. Lenne is ten times worse than Yuna, and here walked in a true nightmare.

The desk lady smiled at Lenne, the poor soul not knowing who she really was, and waited for Lenne to say something. But Lenne just stood there looking at her, chewing her gum. Shuyin suddenly came to life, coming to him what he was to do. "Um, uh, room for two please...Biggest one you have!" Shuyin cried.

"Ok, that'll be-," The lady started.

"And the room has to be at least two degrees lower than room temperature every other day, and two degrees higher on the days other then that. Lenne likes her orange juice in the morning to come to her at exactly 8:32 am with no pulp and bendy straw _only_. This bendy straw must be purple and white striped on Saturdays, Lenne will take red and white striped only on Wednesdays, and all the other days they must be pink swirly straws-"

"But, you just said-"

"-Lenne likes chocolates under her pillows but absolutely _no_ nuts of any kind or almonds, Lenne will only accept milk chocolate with purple wrapper. Her pillow must have approximately exactly 56.7 feathers in them or else she will not sleep. The lamp next to her bed needs to have string turn on maneuvers, no buttons. The light switches on the room must be activated by clapping your hands or else Lenne's precious soft fingers get damaged by flipping the germ infected light switches, and we wouldn't want that would we? _Would we_?!" Shuyin cried out in the lady's face.

"N-N-No, but Sir-," The lady tried helplessly.

"I'm not finished!" He cried and continued. "Every rug and carpet in the room must be vacuumed at least five times a day with only a purple vacuum cleaner or blue, absolutely _no_ yellow or orange or any colors other then that. Any maids available are only allowed in the room when we are not inside, and no one is to interrupt us while we're inside either. Breakfast must come at exactly 8:04 am or later, lunch must consist of only foods with less than 200 carbs, and absolutely _no_ later then 3 o'clock sharp. The shampoos in the bathroom are to be arranged strictly with shampoo first, conditioner after, body wash, then soap, all of which must be purple or else Lenne won't wash her hair. The water temperature must be exactly-," Shuyin continued then suddenly stopped.

The lady looked at him incredulously.

"_Why aren't you writing this down_?" Shuyin boomed, pounding his fist on the counter.

The lady jumped five feet and frantically tried to jot everything down from memory. "S-Sir, there's something though I s-should tell you," The lady stammered trying to at least look as if she was writing anything down.

"What?" Shuyin asked.

"Um, well, the whole hotel was rented out by a group visiting on Spring Break and-," The lady started but was interrupted by a sudden eruption of laughter coming from Lenne.

Lenne laughed out loud and let it fade away with a sigh, thus swiftly pulling out a nail filer and beginning to file her nails. Shuyin watched her then turned back to the lady, clearing his throat. "Uh, Lenne says no room is not ever unavailable to Lenne, the greatest pop singer in the world!" Shuyin proclaimed. He then did a back flip, splits, then finished it off with a cheer holding cheerleader pom poms. "Go-o-o Lenne!" Shuyin cried.

Lenne yawned in the background.

"I'm sure we can work something out," The lady said, smiling nervously.

"Shuyin, sweetie, my bags," Lenne said filing away at her nails while taking a delicate seat to the sofa.

"Right away," Shuyin said and ran outside at high speeds. When he came back he headed towards the far back room, the biggest one, that used to be Auron and Quistis's room while hauling an immense amount of luggage.

Tidus was walking down the hallway while whistling and saw the struggling Shuyin, but thinking he was someone else. "Hey pal, need some help?" Tidus asked.

"Oh, no, no, I'm good, thanks buddy," Shuyin replied through gasps of air.

"You sure? Someone shouldn't really be carrying all that luggage at a time...," Tidus insisted.

"Well, now that you mentioned it," Shuyin said and dropped all the luggage gratefully to allow Tidus to pick it up. But the instant the two recognized each other they gasped dramatically.

"_You_!" They cried in unison, pointing at each other.

"What are _you_ doing here, you...you..._Hair style copy-cater_!" Tidus cried.

"Hey man! I got this hair style _way_ before you did!" Shuyin protested.

"If _you're_ here, there's no doubt Lenne's here too, huh?" Tidus sneered.

"Yeah, well, what's it to ya?" Shuyin asked back, crossing his arms.

"Uh...nothing, so um, yeah! In your face!" Tidus feebly tried to come up with a comeback.

"Well...um, uh, _your mom_!" Shuyin cried and taking Lenne's luggage with him he tried to run as fast as he could to their room, moving only like two small steps a minute. "Almost...There...," He wheezed carrying all the stuff.

Tidus raised an eyebrow.

"You'll...See...Tidus! Better not try...To...Catch up to me!" Shuyin said menacingly, even though he was five feet away.

"Whatever dude," Tidus said and waving him off, he made his way elsewhere.

--

Meanwhile...

--

Lenne took her sunglasses off, and swished back her hair. "Ugh, what a dump," She muttered under her breath. The desk lady had long since cried out an excuse that her uncle's adoptive cousin's step brother's half sister's twice removed other cousin who moved to Idaho and has a PHD in COWS, got killed then came back to life again only to be attacked by ravage squirrels who barely ate her alive but just before that had her 50th child so the desk lady was going to her funeral and to celebrate the newborn's birth with the rest of her relatives and non relatives and cows from Idaho.

Anyway, Lenne walked down to the dining hall where to her entertainment she found Yuna and some other guy she didn't know (frankly, a rather ugly one) talking alone at a table. Lenne walked up to them smiling and the guy looked up at her briefly and his eyes sort of flashed.

"This can't be good," Vincent suddenly muttered.

"Huh?" Yuna asked and turned around to her utmost horror! "L-L-Lenne...What the fuck are _you _doing here?" Yuna suddenly asked in shock.

"Well, well, well, would you look who it is! And wow, what a pleasant way to greet old friends!" Lenne said in a bittersweet voice, though she was smiling like a psycho Barbie doll.

"...Friends?" Yuna wondered in puzzlement as Lenne gave her a quick hug.

"Oh, Yuna! Don't be silly! Anywho, aren't you going to introduce me to your gentleman friend here?" Lenne asked, stepping over to Vincent and twirling a strand of his long hair.

"Hey! Leave him alone, Lenne!" Yuna snapped.

"Yuna, it's ok-," Vincent started but Lenne's voice went over his.

"Gosh Yuna, how rude of you! Didn't your mother ever teach you to share?" Lenne asked and to Vincent's surprise she sat on his lap.

Yuna turned red, either with embarrassment or fury, or...perhaps both. "Lenne! So is this why you suddenly appeared here, to come here and taunt me?" Yuna asked.

"I just love it when she gets angry, don't you?" Lenne said into Vincent's ear.

"I, uh...Um...," Vincent stammered pulling his collar.

"Vincent!" Yuna cried.

"What?" Vincent asked.

Lenne suddenly yawned. "All this name calling is making me sleepy. I'm going to check how Shuyinny Poo is doing. We'll chat later, won't we Yunie?" Lenne asked getting up from Vincent's lap and walking away.

"Your loyal dog is here too, huh?" Yuna wondered loudly.

"At least _my_ dog is trained...can't say the same for yours. Where is Tidus anyway?" Lenne asked smirking.

"He's uh...Um...Who cares? Why do you need to know?" Yuna challenged crossing her arms. No way in every hair spray can Yuna has ever owned will she tell Lenne she broke up with Tidus.

"I'm sure I can find him...All I gotta do is whistle, right?" Lenne said inspecting her nails. Then with an evil laugh she strutted out the room.

Yuna growled like a wild animal and Vincent shifted his eyes nervously. "I can't _stand _her!" Yuna cried, tugging at her hair.

"Maybe I should go...," Vincent said.

"Why? So you can go over there and follow her?" Yuna suddenly demanded.

"What are you talking about?" Vincent replied puzzled.

"I saw the way you looked at her! Well, let me tell you now she isn't your type, plus the fact that she's taken, and did you know that she-," Yuna started but Vincent put a hand up and she stopped.

"I'm not _going _after Lenne, Yuna. I'm going to tend to some other businesses and I advise you to do the same, so you can calm down a little. I think all these talking sessions we have are...Um...Sort of putting ideas in your_ head_," Vincent said. Ouch!

Yuna looked taken aback. "Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?" She asked, but Vincent merely shook his head and swooped out of the room. Yuna sighed and crossed her arms. "Why is Vincent acting so strange? We were able to talk all the time...," Yuna muttered. She gathered up all her stuff and decided to go to the spa to think clearly.

--

At the spa, Yuna ran into Tifa. "Tifa! You...Pamper yourself?" Yuna asked, looking her up and down.

Tifa glared at her. "Of course I do! What are you doing here?" Tifa wondered.

"I need to clear my head," Yuna sighed.

"How come?" Tifa asked and they walked together to the locker room.

"Can you believe that _Lenne_ is here?" Yuna told.

"Lenne?" Tifa questioned.

"You know...Lenne? My school, career, and life rival?" Yuna grumbled, changing.

"Oh...The chick with that hit single, has some blonde guy following her around like a body guard? You know, he looks almost _identical _to Tidus," Tifa chuckled.

Yuna rolled her eyes. "Wait...Did you say hit single?" Yuna asked.

"Yeah, came out last week. It has a really catchy tune, too...," Tifa said.

"Oh please, don't sing it," Yuna replied when Tifa looked about ready to sing. Yuna rubbed her forehead.

"You look even more stressed," Tifa noted.

"Lenne has a hit single...I _promised_ my manager I'd come up with something original during break, but...God, _so_ much stuff has been going on," Yuna said as she and Tifa walked to the sauna in towels.

They then screamed as they ran into a green alien with large cucumber eyes! But never fear, it was only Rinoa. "Yunie, Tifa!" Rinoa cried.

"You scared the living aeons out of me Rinoa, sheesh," Yuna said.

"Sorry Yunie! You guys came out of nowhere, and...Wait...What are _you _all doing here? Did you plan a spa party _without me_?" Rinoa asked hurriedly and started to sniff.

"No! No, I ran into Tifa, and we ran into you," Yuna reassured her.

"Oh...Ok then!" Rinoa cried cheerful again.

They all walked together to a sauna and sat down in the steamy, wooden room. "So, Yuna, why do you look so stressed?" Rinoa asked.

"Well, first of all, Lenne and Shuyin found their way here, Lenne has a single and I haven't even written any rough drafts, not to mention back ups, Vincent is starting to avoid me, and well I feel like crap!" Yuna cried.

"Well, you have little problems, try having the same problem, not changing, since you reached puberty," Tifa grumbled.

Rinoa looked at Tifa thoughtfully and reached for her hand. "We _all _have monthly periods, Honey," Rinoa said softly.

Tifa snatched her hand back and gave Rinoa a crazed look. "Not that, you psycho! I'm talking about _Cloud_," Tifa said.

Yuna laughed but Rinoa didn't get it. "Cloud gets a monthly period as well?" Rinoa asked. Nobody answered. Frankly, I think they weren't sure how to answer.

"Cloud is so clueless. I'll bet he even forgets the chick's name he slept with the night before," Yuna said, fluffing her hair up casually.

Rinoa laughed but Tifa didn't. "Hey, he's not_ that _clueless, he's just a little...slow, you know?" Tifa said.

"Tifa, you know how long it's been and he still doesn't have a clue you like him?" Rinoa pointed out shrilly.

"It's not his fault though, it's...it's me. I don't hint, like you guys, I don't put myself out there," Tifa grumbled. "I don't even know how to flirt, for Pete's sake."

"I remember in Junior High we tried to teach you," Rinoa giggled and she and Yuna laughed.

"Yeah, yeah," Tifa replied looking away.

"Well...As for me, I kinda have a problem too," Rinoa said.

"What is it?" Yuna asked.

Rinoa looked at her hands then at Yuna. "I, well, I like...," Rinoa started but then she remembered Yuna's words, about "Girl Code" and knew Yuna would tear her to shreds if she found out about anything...So it wasn't a good idea to tell.

"Spit it out," Tifa said.

"I like...Well, this one _guy_...," Rinoa said drumming her fingers nervously.

"Oh, who?" Yuna asked excitedly.

Rinoa smiled shyly. "I won't tell you...but I _can_ tell you that he's the nicest guy I know. He cares about other people's feelings, and he can just make me laugh for so long," Rinoa replied.

"Sounds like love," Yuna noted. Rinoa gulped and looked worried.

"Wait...What about Squall? I know he's a man of few words, but you still have to consider his feelings," Tifa pointed out.

"I know, I know! That's my biggest problem. The poor guy is out working, and here I am almost _cheating_ on him!" Rinoa cried desperately.

"Hey, you're not cheating unless you sleep with this mystery man," Yuna smirked.

Rinoa shifted her eyes. Yuna and Tifa's eyes grew wide. "Rinoa!" They scolded in unison.

"What? I didn't sleep with him! Don't be stupid. All I'm admitting is that I think I may have feelings for him, and that I think he's a great guy. But the thing is, there's _no_ way I could date him," Rinoa explained.

"How come?" Tifa asked.

"Well...There's someone else," Rinoa replied.

"That stinks. Does he even deserve her?" Yuna asked.

"No, well...It's the opposite. She doesn't deserve him, she breaks his heart every day, and the poor guy is too caught up in the love he once had he won't move on. I feel so sorry for him, and I want to help, not to mention...Maybe go out with him myself," Rinoa explained.

"Sounds like a bitch to me," Yuna replied, inspecting her hair. Rinoa looked up at Yuna then at her own feet, somewhat embarrassed.

"Look Rinoa, what I think you should do is wait. Wait until Squall gets back, then talk it out with him. If you still have feelings for this other guy then, and you and Squall officially break up, you can then maybe try something. Just right now, for both the guy, the other girl, and Squall, it's really not that fair," Tifa advised.

"Fair? Who cares about being fair? If you want something, I think you should go ahead and get it," Yuna replied.

"Well, see Yuna, not all of us can really apply to that philosophy, maybe just you and Lenne think that way," Tifa said angrily.

"Ugh, don't even compare me to that slut," Yuna replied, turning her head away.

"Guys, don't fight. I don't have a chance with this guy anyway, let's not fight about it. I'll be a good girlfriend and stay with Squall," Rinoa said feebly.

"Don't listen to Tifa, Rinoa," Yuna said. Tifa crossed her arms.

"No, Yuna, really I don't have a chance-," Rinoa said shaking her head.

"Everyone has a chance...Heck, I could go out with Squall if I wanted too, I just well...He's not my type," Yuna said waving it off.

"What's wrong with Squall? If you should know, he's really good in-,"

"Bedtime ladies, the spa will be closing shortly," A female voice came out from a speaker. Rinoa gulped down her words, as Tifa and Yuna turned to each other and laughed.

"Was that what you were going to say?" Tifa asked, laughing.

"Close enough. C'mon, let's go," Rinoa replied and the three friends walked out together.

--

Tifa was the only one left in the hallway as she walked towards her room. Both Rinoa and Yuna had already gone to bed. Humming to herself, she took out her keys and was about to open her door when someone called her name.

"Tifa, right?" A sweet voice came out of nowhere.

"Huh?" Tifa wondered, turning around. She found Lenne coming towards her, a sweet sort of smile on her face that matched her voice. "Um, yes, hello," Tifa replied scratching her neck as she watched Lenne.

"I was wondering...Could I ask for some fashion advice, real quick?" Lenne wondered.

Tifa laughed out loud and Lenne's smile dropped. "Fashion? You're asking the wrong girl," Tifa replied, turning back to her door.

"Wait," Lenne said hurriedly, grabbing Tifa's arm. Tifa looked at her and she smiled sweetly again. "I'm not asking the wrong girl. Trust me, I'm the most ahead in Fashion person here, and your look is _it_. I just don't think I could pull it off...Won't you help me? I love your clothes," Lenne said coming closer.

"Uh...," Tifa stammered backing up. "Sure...I don't have much to do anyway...," Tifa replied finally.

Lenne backed away and smiled content. "Good answer. C'mon, my room's this way," Lenne said leading Tifa down the hallway. They went inside and found Shuyin with goggles on, working on making his own coat hanger.

"Shuyin!" Lenne yelled over the loud noise. Shuyin stopped the carving wood thing machine (Shut the fuck up, I've never taken wood shop, ok?) and pulled his goggles off his face. "Babes, uh...Who's this?" Shuyin asked.

"This is Tifa," Lenne introduced sweetly and Tifa smiled nervously.

"Hey," Tifa replied.

Shuyin also said hi, but raised an eyebrow at Lenne, who quickly said, "Tifa's giving me fashion advice...Wouldn't her clothes just look _great _on me?" Lenne asked Shuyin, emphasizing the word 'great' with the flashing of her eyes.

"Uh...Sure?" Shuyin replied, scratching his head.

Lenne laughed casually, turning to Tifa. "Men, huh?" Lenne chuckled and Tifa laughed along with her nervously. "Anyway, you wouldn't really want to hang out here with us girls...Why don't you go hang out with the other guys, or something?" Lenne inquired.

"Um...," Shuyin replied, not really used to male bonding anymore.

"Cloud and some of the guys are at the bar I think, why don't you go there?" Tifa suggested timidly.

"Cloud...He's your boyfriend, isn't he?" Lenne asked.

Tifa blushed tremendously. "Oh no, if only, but nah," Tifa chuckled.

"Oh...You like him?" Lenne wondered. Tifa didn't really answer, but tried to hide her face. But nothing could really get past Lenne, how great and wonderful she is!

"Shuyin sweetie, go hang out with the guys, we'll just be a minute. Make sure to meet this 'Cloud'. I haven't met him yet, we could be friends!" Lenne exclaimed and Shuyin, extremely confused, walked out. "Is Cloud a nice guy?" Lenne asked, jumping on the bed and looking up at Tifa with interest.

"Oh, yeah, a bit clueless...But hey, all guys are like that," Tifa said, sitting at a chair.

"Tell me about it," Lenne grumbled, starting to file her nails.

"Hmph," Tifa suddenly grunted.

"Pardon?" Lenne inquired.

"Oh, nothing, it's just...You remind me a lot of Yuna. She'd call Tidus sweetie a lot and he'd do anything she told him too. She also files her nails like crazy," Tifa noted.

Lenne chuckled, a little dully though. "Trust me, Yuna and I are _nothing_ alike," Lenne replied seriously.

Tifa shrugged. "Anyway...You want me to help ya with your clothes now?" Tifa asked. Lenne yawned.

"You know what? Why don't we hang out tomorrow...Suddenly I'm dreadfully tired. I'm so sorry...You came all the way to my room," Lenne said apologetically.

Tifa got up, waving it off. "Oh, it's fine, I'm just glad I got to meet you officially in person. No offense, but Yuna doesn't like you very much...She's said some things before, I just wasn't sure," Tifa replied.

"Yuna and I just joke around like that, but we're _really_ good friends. Heck, she would've never met Tidus if it weren't for me," Lenne said matter of factly, opening the door for Tifa.

"Really?" Tifa wondered, not knowing that before.

"Oh, sure! We go way back. We just kinda lost touch a bit during a period of time when I got sent to boarding school," Lenne replied.

"Ouch," Tifa said wincing.

"Anyway, I'll make a deal with you. How about we meet some other time...And we'll do a trade!" Lenne proposed happily.

"A...Trade?" Tifa asked, facing Lenne.

"I know my closet by heart, and I know I don't have anything like your style. We'll talk about it tomorrow, you'll see," Lenne said mysteriously. Tifa looked at her suspiciously, but finally said goodbye, heading towards her room.

What was the 'deal' that was to take place? Find out soon enough next time!


End file.
